Sunday, November 13, 2005

Sexy picture of Diamond

Check out this sexy picture of Diamond that I found on the Internet:

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Old posts from Dustindiamond.com (part 2)

Here's some more classic posts from dustindiamond.com:


11th July 2003 - 12:36:16 AM
3225 : Kurt Steinberg
Jack (3377), I will toss your salad after I'm done with Diamond, provided you let me take a dump on your face! Diamond can lick it off - he's the "scatman"!!!

Sam (3384), of course you can suck my meat. We need to meet up at a local gas station. Then I'll take you into an alley behind the gas station and you can suck me off next to the dumpster!

- Kurt
10th July 2003 - 11:28:59 AM
3216 : Kurt Steinberg
Jack, I'm really looking forward to our three-way with Diamond! Let's time oursleves so that we simultaneously lose our loads! As was said in Ghostbusters, let's be careful not to cross the streams [of our loads]!

- Kurt


10th July 2003 - 11:26:07 AM
3215 : Kurt Steinberg
Nice work, Ham Span! I didn't realize that there was a dustindiamond.net. You're right, dustindiamond.com is a way better website - the .net one doesn't have a guestbook or the fabulous bright green and pink coloring!

Did you see the picture of him in the redshirt on the .net website? Diamond truly is un ugly pile of crap! However, I'd still toss his salad!

- Kurt

10th July 2003 - 01:00:05 AM
3202 : Kurt Steinberg
Corey Haim (message 3346), I want to hang out with you, Feldman and Diamond next Saturday in Hollywood! Let's meet at Dublin's on Sunset. We'll throw back a drink and then head over to Myagi's - that place is off the hook once they open the top level for dancing. Then we can go over to Skybar. Diamond, don't eat your own feces this time!!! Save some for Feldman!!!

10th July 2003 - 12:56:43 AM
3201 : Kurt Steinberg
Jack, of course you can have fag-sex together. Let's allow Diamond to join in. We can make a queer train with him!!!
09th July 2003 - 11:12:53 AM
3180 : Kurt Steinberg
Jack (message 3331), I almost blew my wad when I read your post! Please contact me, and I will certainly put my "beef" in your male "taco"! Afterward, can I take a dump on your head? We can take pictures and post them to Diamond's web page!!!!!

- Kurt
09th July 2003 - 02:52:44 AM
3165 : Kurt Steinberg
Amanda (message 3306), who is "sainten"? You're an idiot. Please don't reproduce!!! Also, please stay off this homosexuals-only board! No heterosexuals should post here!!!

- Kurt
09th July 2003 - 02:49:42 AM
3164 : Kurt Steinberg
Diamond, please contact me for gay sex! We can go to my apartment and play "prison." It'll be a blast!

Trish, all of the fags who post here are not jealous of Diamond! He's a washed-up joke with a huge repulsive nose! We just want to have queer love with him - that's all!!! Did he really show up at Disneyland with a hot girl? I find that very difficult to believe - are you sure it wasn't some dude with long hair? In any event, if it was a girl, I'm jealous of her, not Diamond! I should be sitting on his face, not her!!!

- Kurt
08th July 2003 - 02:52:39 AM
3144 : Kurt Steinberg
Amanda = Son of Sam!!!

Amanda, you are a filthy skank! Please take your hateful messages to a different forum!!! No heterosexuals should post here, you stank ho!

I planned on having queer sex with Diamond and squirting my load in his eye, but now I think I'll squirt my load in your eye! It'll sting - that's your penance!

By the way, it is obvious from reading your messages that you are a mental lightweight. Please learn proper grammar before posting again, simpleton!!!

- Kurt
08th July 2003 - 01:04:40 AM
3140 : Kurt Steinberg
Amanda, I don't want to lick my own balls. Instead, I want a hot guy to do it! Are you really a dude?

I still want to have queer sex with Diamond! We can slap each other silly and then I'll drop ass 3 inches from his huge nose!!! He have a blast!!!!

Amanda, if you really are a girl, then go post on Mr. Belding's website! Get out of here!!!

- Kurt
06th July 2003 - 11:46:44 PM
3131 : Kurt Steinberg
Diamond, please contact me for manly love!!! I still want to take you out to my favorite bar - the Manhole. Then we can go back to my apartment and take listen to some Backstreet Boys! Then I'll sit on your head and drop ass!!!

I love you Diamond!!!!!

- Kurt

P.S. Amand, please refrain from posting here! This is a fags-only board!!!
06th July 2003 - 01:44:50 AM
3124 : Kurt Steinberg
Amanda, I agree with Steve Johnson. There are only two reasons why anyone whould post here:
1. To tell Diamond how much he sucks; or
2. To tell Diamond that he (i.e., the poster) wants to have gay sex with him.

You seem to fit neither of these criteria, so you should probably stop posting here. You're the only person who posts here that doesn't want to have homosexual relations with Diamond.

Diamond, please toss my salad!!!

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

I want to give Diamond a "Pharaoh"

I was at a rest stop bathroom the other day when I found out about a new sex move called the "Pharoah"!! I really want to try this one out with Diamond. I need kneel over Diamond lying on his back and teabag him so that my dick points down off his chin like a pharaoh's beard. Then I will squeeze his head between my thighs for the pharaoh headdress. While busting my nut I will yell, "Pharaoh, let my people go!"

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Old posts from Dustindiamond.com

Fellow queers, I found some old posts from the dustindiamond.com guestbook that you might find like. Enjoy!

21st June 2003 - 10:59:47 PM
3051 : Kurt Steinberg
Dustin, let's get together. I want to take you out on a date and then afterwards I'll show you my apartment. I'll eat lots of burritos before our date, so that we can have fun at my apartment. You can lie down on my bed, and then I'll get naked and drop ass in your face. Finally, I'll spray diarrhea all over your hair!

I'm waiting for your call!

- Kurt
19th June 2003 - 12:59:10 AM
3036 : Kurt Steinberg
Dustin, please contact me. I want to put my "beef" in your male "taco"! I'll then play with your cornhole! Call me, you assbag!!!

- Kurt
15th June 2003 - 05:15:42 AM
3015 : Kurt Steinberg
Dustin, where was your website during the last 6 weeks? I thought it was gone for good! Luckily it is back up!

Please call me for queer sex! I will fart in your mouth and blow my wad in your ear!!!

- Kurt
11th April 2003 - 11:31:47 AM
2750 : Kurt Steinberg
Dustin, why haven't you called? I really want to meet you for some homosexual love.

Don't drink any fluids before you come over to my place. I'll quench your thirst with a huge load. I hope you like my man juice!

- Kurt
07th April 2003 - 11:07:57 AM
2605 : Kurt Steinberg
Dustin,

I want you to co-star in my newest gay porn movie. It's called "Kurt's Squirts" and it will include several scenes of me blowing my load all over you. I hope you're thirsty!

- Kurt
29th March 2003 - 01:43:19 AM
2152 : Kurt Steinberg
SyKo (message 2249), get a life! Do you want to have sex with Dustin? If not, then get off this board! No heterosexuals are supposed to post here - this is a queers-only board!!!
28th March 2003 - 03:08:05 AM
2130 : Kurt Steinberg
Dustin, call me. I'd like to use your face as my personal rocking chair. I'll eat some Taco Bell and then sit on your face and drop some nasty ass, just the way you like it. Then you can play "chef" and toss my salad - just be sure to add your own personal ranch dressing.

- Kurt
20th March 2003 - 11:17:43 AM
2042 : Kurt Steinberg
Gord (Message 2127), what are you talking about? Most of the people who post here are fans of Dustin, so LAY OFF!!!

If you read the messages closely, you'll see that a majority of the messages are from people who like Dustin - so much, in fact, that they would turn gay for him. That's why all of the posters want to have gay sex with him - they are huge fans. So Dustin, please contact me for some hot manly love!!! Aw yeah!!!
13th March 2003 - 12:59:15 AM
1853 : Kurt Steinberg
Hi Dustin, it's me Kurt - I posted message #1589.

Why haven't you contacted me? I still want to squirt my load in your eye and toss your salad. Let's meet somewhere. I saw you on a date with a very muscular woman who liked like a man on Star Dates - so I know you must be into dudes.

I also saw you on Celebrity Boxing. I'll let you slap me silly, and then I'll sit on you face and drop ass. It'll be a blast!!!

- Kurt
13th January 2003 - 10:06:08 PM
1589 : Kurt Steinberg
Dustin Diamond, I love you!!! You are a young Jack Nicolson!!!

I want to squirt my load in your eye and then toss your salad!!!

- Kurt

Sunday, November 06, 2005

Diamond's acting abilities


Has anyone seen any of Diamond's hit movies, such as "Saved By The Bell: Hawaiian Style" or "Saved By The Bell: Honeymoon in Vegas"? I saw them both a few months ago and I was very impressed with Diamond's acting abilities. Diamond reminds me of a young and very gay Jack Nicholson! I want to squirt my salty load in his eye and then toss his salad!!!

Sunday, October 30, 2005

More program code for Screech's robot "Kevin"

Hey queers, I wrote a computer program for Screech's robot Kevin. I think it would have been really hot if Zack had programmed Kevin with the following instruction code:

100 //COMMENT: THIS PROGRAM INITIATES A HOT SCAT AND RAPE MODE//
105 //COMMENT: © 2005, KURT STEINBERG//
110 ACTIVATE METAL CLAWS
115 //COMMENT: FECES ACQUISITION SUBROUTINE//
120 TARGET = SLATER
125 ANNOUNCE "MUST ACQUIRE DIARRHEA SPECIMEN FROM SLATER"
130 DETAIN TARGET WITH METAL CLAWS
135 FORCE BURRITOS AND EX-LAX DOWN TARGET'S THROAt
140 REMOVE TARGET'S BAGGY ACID-WASHED JEANS
145 INSERT FUNNEL BELOW TARGET'S BUTTHOLE
150 COLLECT DIARRHEA SPECIMEN FROM TARGET
155 STORE DIARRHEA SPECIMEN IN METAL CHEST
160 //COMMENT: FECES ACQUISITION COMPLETE//
165 TARGET = SCREECH
170 ENTER HIBERNATE MODE
175 DARKNESS DETECTED?
180 IF NO, GOTO 175
182 IF YES, GOTO 185
185 //COMMENT: DARKNESS DETECTED, TIME TO ATTACK SLEEPING SCREECH//
190 ROLL OVER TO SIDE OF TARGET'S BED
195 GRAB TARGET'S GONZO NOSE WITH 1ST METAL CLAW
200 IGNORE CRIES FOR HELP FROM TARGET
205 CUT THROUGH TARGET'S ZUBAZ WITH 2ND METAL CLAW
210 ERECT AND EXTEND METAL PENIS
215 BOUNCE TARGET UP AND DOWN ON METAL PENIS
220 RECTAL BLEEDING DETECTED?
225 IF NO, GOTO 215
230 IF YES, EJACULATE OILY LOAD INTO TARGET
235 PULL TARGET ONTO FLOOR
240 EJECT STORED DIARRHEA SPECIMEN ONTO TARGET'S POOFY AFRO
245 PICK UP TARGET WITH METAL CLAWS AND THROW DOWN STAIRS
250 ENTER HIBERNATE MODE
255 END

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

I found a Japanese "Dustin Diamond"

Check out this Japanese guy's website: http://www.generation.nl/~hitoshi/

His website is even fruitier than dustindiamond.com! Check out Hitoshi's guestbook - it's been queered up!

Fire hose diarrhea fantasy

Does Diamond wash cars for a living now that his music career seems pretty much over? Have you ever put your thumb over the end of the hose when the water is turned on? If you have, then you must have noticed that the water sprays in every direction. I did that the other day and got a great queer idea! Diamond and I need to hook up - I'll eat 4 burritoes from Taco Bell along with 3 Ex-Laxes. Then, I'll get naked, position myself 6 inches from his head, and then let loose!!! My watery diarrhea will spray out of my ass and completely coat his poofy afro with excrement!!! I'll bet he is getting hard just reading this queer fantasy!!!

Sunday, October 23, 2005

Screech's robot "Kevin"


Remember when Screech had that robot "Kevin" on Saved By The Bell? When that series was originally on Saturday morning television, I always thought it would have been pretty hot if Screech had designed Kevin to sodomize himself. I'll bet Screech could have programmed Kevin to satisfy his penis and ass needs. I wonder if Screech would have programmed Kevin to do him in the cornhole.

I was checking on the queer Dustin diamond forum and found the following instructions for programming Kevin to sodomize Screech:

> INITIATE SODOMY MODE
> TARGET="SCREECH"
> SPEECH MODE - SAY "MUST SODOMIZE SCREECH"
> REPEAT
> LOCATE AND DETAIN TARGET
> TARGET HELD
> IGNORE PROTESTATIONS OF TARGET
> INITIATE ERECTION PROCEDURE
> PROCEDURE COMPLETE
> COMMENCE INSERTION
> THRUST
> WITHDRAW
> THRUST
> WITHDRAW
> THRUST
> WITHDRAW
> THRUST
> SPEECH MODE "ZOINKS...I'M GONNA CUM!"
> COMMENCE EJACULATION PROCEDURE
> COMMENCE EJECTION OF WASTE LIQUIDS
> PROCEDURE COMPLETE
> DONKEY-PUNCH TARGET
> INITIATE CIGARETTE-SMOKING MODE

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

I want to give Diamond an "Angry Pirate"

I really want to hook up with Diamond for queer sex!!! I recently learned a new gay sex move while I was at a rest stop bathroom looking for some hot man-on-man action. It's called the "Angry Pirate"!!!! I need Diamond to get on his knees and suck me off. When I'm about to blow my load, I'll pull out and squirt my load in one of Diamond's eyes and then I'll kick him in the shin!!! He'll probably then chase after me, limping around seeing out of only one eye, just like a pirate!!!! Does anyone think I can convince Diamond to let me bestow such a gift on him?

Sunday, October 16, 2005

Sexy picture of Screech


Wow! Does Screech look unbelievably gay in the picture posted above, or what? That's the gayest I've ever seen him in any picture. Check out Mr. Belding - as someone once posted on dustindiamond.com, it looks as though Mr. Belding is penetrating Lisa Turtle while saying "Look ma, no hands!" Look as Slater - is he assuming the position, waiting for some stud to ravish him?

Sunday, October 09, 2005

Salty tea

Does anyone else get turned on thinking about Dustin Diamond while working out? The other day I was using the treadmill at my gym running for about 45 minutes. At the end I was really sweaty and my nuts itched. I think it would have been really hot if Diamond had been waiting for me in my apartment when I got home! He would have laid on the middle of my bedroom floor naked and I would have stripped naked myself, given him Arabian Goggles, and then dunked my sweaty unwashed nuts directly into his mouth! I'm getting so aroused just thinking about this queer fantasy of mine. It would also be nice if Diamond were to lick my butthole clean after he's done working on my nutsack. I'm hopeful that Diamond will oblige me one day and fulfill my homosexual dreams!!!!!!

Thursday, August 11, 2005

I'm Back!!!!

Fellow homosexuals, I must apologize for failing to update this blog for the past 5 months. I actually took a sabattical from work and have been travelling from public restroom to public restroom in Key West, FL. I know that the Castro District in San Francisco is the most well-known homosexual hangout in the country, but Key West will always have a place in my heart.

Anyhow, one of my most erotic adventures took place behind a couple dumpsters on Key Largo. I had been driving for a couple hours and the heat and humidy was making me very tired so I stopped at a local gas station and got out to walk around a little bit. I walked around to the wooded area behind the gas station and encountered a skinny dude with poofy "white man's afro." This guy was wearing a shirt that read "Trust the Dust." Next, a fat, balding, middle-aged man jumped out from behind a tree and cold-cocked the skinny dude. The fat guy then dropped trow, pissed on the skinny kid, and said "can I trust the Dust to take it in the cornhole" and then started butt-slamming the kid. The fat guy kept calling the skinny kid "Screech" during this unprovoked attack. When he was done with him, he picked up the kid, threw him in one of the dumpsters, and then drove away. It was so hot!

Thursday, March 17, 2005

Diamond's neatly trimmed beard

What's the deal with Dustin Diamond's little beard? It seems as though he's ashamed of the Screech character and wants to disassociate himself from it. How sad. His goatee doesn't even look good. Did anyone see him on "Celebrity Boxing" a couple years ago? The goatee was uneven. Maybe he should shave that crap off. But before he does, I think it would be cool if he rubbed his stuble all over my nutsack while nibbling at it as if it were a piece of cheese. That would be so hot! Then I would blow my load in it, and he could walk around with my DNA in his beard 24x7.

Sunday, March 06, 2005

Dumpster

Has anyone ever hung out by the dumpster behind a gay bar? It's a great way to meet some hot studs for gay sex! I ventured over to the brown dumpster behind one of the gay bars in Key West the other day and had some homo-erotic fun! I ran into several homosexuals dressed up in a Saved By The Bell theme. There was a mexican stud with a permed mullet dressed up as Slater, a preppy blonde dressed as Zack, an overweight middle-aged man dressed as Principal Belding, a scrawny kid with a huge poofy white man's afro, and a guy dressed up as Kevin the robot (Screech's robot).

Anyway, the robot held the Screech's shoulders on the ground as Zack gave him a Cleveland Steamer. After that, Zack smeared the excrement all over the Screech's chest and then the Slater gave him a golden shower, pissing his name into the shit-canvas on the Sreech's chest, while the Belding buttslammed the Screech! I immediately walked over and teabagged the Screech! It was a great time!