Dustin Diamond and Other Celebrities Queer Fantasies Blog!!!: Rick Bawls

These are questions that I asked my stalker, Rick Bawls,over at the now-defunct Dustin Diamond Love Forum:

Posted: Jul 28 2010, 04:52 AM
Hey Rick, please confirm that you spend more time masturbating while thinking about Randy Constan and homeless men than you do looking for employment. You truly are a welfare queen, aren't you?

Posted: Jul 28 2010, 09:28 PM
Rick, remember that time when you got kicked out of "The Attic," your favorite dance club, after you got caught watching random dudes pissing at the urinal in the bathroom? Remember when you were thrown into an alley and landed in a puddle of barf and urine? Remember when you woke up some homeless men who started yelling at you? Remember when the homeless man doubled-up on you? Remember how much you enjoyed their smelly cocks? Remember when one of the homeless men fired his diseased seed into your mouth and said, "Here's a little HIV juice for Rick!" Remember when you contracted AIDS and have cut your life expectancy by 35 years? Remember how much this turns you on because you are a deranged bug chaser? You sure had a fucked-up experience that time!

Posted: Jul 29 2010, 06:14 AM
Hey Rick, please confirm that you are the biological son of serial killer and necrophiliac Jeffrey Dahmer.

Posted: Jul 30 2010, 05:26 AM
Rick, remember when your dad, Jeffrey Dahlmer, killed all of those people and had sex with their corpses? Please confirm that you feltched your dad's semen out of the corpses after he was done. You sure were one sick, deranged faggot that time!

Posted: Jul 30 2010, 11:10 PM
Rick, please confirm that the "n" key on your computer keyboard no longer works because you ruined it when you blew your little load on it while you were masturbating vigorously the other day when you posted under your 20 different logins on Facebook.

Posted: Aug 10 2010, 09:21 PM
Rick Bawls, you fucking faggot, I am going to fire my seed down your throat after you finish sucking off the 17 bums in front of me in line at the gloryhole.

Posted: Aug 11 2010, 08:03 AM
Rick Bawls, how many terabytes of gay porn are stored on your computer's hard drive? Remember that time you uncle caught you having sex with the little holes in the serial port of your 1992 Packard Bell? Remember when your uncle molested you when he caught you? Remember how that was your happiest childhood memory? Your life sure sucks, Rick!

Posted: Aug 16 2010, 10:33 PM
Rick Bawls, please confirm that you moved to Canada in 1991 after the arrest of your biological father, Jeffrey Dahmer? Remember how you lived in Canada with your uncle Cletus, a convicted child molester who was permitted to molest children at will with no repercussions due to the criminal-friendly laws of Canada? Remember how your uncle was also a cowardly draft dodger and had moved to Canada during the Vietnam War so that he could avoid mandatory conscription into the U.S. army? Remember when Cletus woke you up one night by shoving a sweaty jock strap into your mouth and then viciously raped you? Remember how that was the single most homoerotic moment of your life and you still think about it while pleasuring yourself today? Remember how Uncle Cletus ass-raped every day until you moved away to become a janitor at the shopping mall? Remember how his ass-rapings permanently damaged your colon and now you have to use a colostomy bag to take a dump? You've sure had a shitty life!

Posted: Aug 17 2010, 11:01 PM
Rick Bawls, remember when you were a teenager and started worked for that company that laundered dirty cloth baby diapers? Remember how this was a dream job for you because you got to smell shit and piss all day? Remember how you would rub the soiled diapers on your face while jerking off? Remember when you were caught masturbating while rolling around on the floor on top of several dirty diapers? Remember when you were fired, ending your 15 year career at the company? Remember when you were arrested for lewd conduct? Remember how disappointed that made you? Remember how less disappointed you were when you shared a cell with an HIV+ homosexual Puerto Rican prisoner who would pump you full of his diseased seed every night? You sure were perverted that time!

Posted: Aug 18 2010, 07:09 AM
Rick Bawls, please confirm that you are currently driving to Hunstville, AL to meet up with Antoine Dodson, the guy at 1:00 in this video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vZKXAFqdlC4

Posted: Aug 18 2010, 05:34 PM
Rick Bawls, remember when your father, serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer, would murder male prostitutes and drill holes in the the heads of their corpses? Remember when you would eat out the murdered victims' asses after they had died? Remember how your dad would then have sex with the corpses while you cheered him on? You sure are one sick fuck!

Posted: Aug 19 2010, 12:45 AM
Rick Bawls, did you produce this video for Antoine Dodson, the object of your homosexual affections? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TrWu13Uh2Yw

You and Antoine make such a cute couple. I bet he'll really give it to you right in the ass in front of Antoine's masturbating homies when you visit him in the projects!

Posted: Aug 19 2010, 07:12 PM
Remember when I sent out that evite to let people know about the gay dumpster party in the alley behind the McDonald's on 5th Street last week? Rick Bawls RSVPed for himself, Timmy Woods, the fake John Dado, the fake Kurt Steinberg, Tiffany Powell, and Megan Stonehouse? However, Rick Bawls was the only one of that group to show up, although he claimed that the spirit of his imaginary friends were there with him. Rocco and I made sure that Rick felt some real, not imaginary, pain in his groin as we both to town on his tiny nuts with those rusty car antennas! Rick deserved this for causing me to over-order Taco Bell tacos for the get-together. Normally I order enough tacos ahead of time so that we can each eat three during the gay orgy. However, this time some of the food went to waste! I almost gave some of the extra tacos to a bum, but instead I decided to throw them down the storm sewer.

Remember when Rick Bawls started coughing up blood while his balls were being whipped and then thanked Rocco and me for giving him the most pleasurable experience of his life? Rick sure was a sick fuck that time!

Posted: Aug 19 2010, 08:51 PM
I liked when Rick's Velcro Wallet fell out of his pants while we were whipping his nuts and a picture of his father, Jeffrey Dahmer, sodomizing a black mans corpse could be seen. I was amazed at the amount of semen that coated the picture! Rick you owe Kurt $25.00 American Dollars for those taco's that went to waste! And don't even think about trying to pay in that Canadian Monopoly Money!!!

ROCCO

Posted: Aug 19 2010, 09:42 PM
Remember how it was a pink "Hello Kitty" wallet? What a homo! And that photograph was absolutely coated in about 1/2 inch of dried semen. I wonder why Rick Bawls didn't get extra copies made so he could jerk off onto a new copy of the photograph from time to time. Maybe Rick gets turned on when he sees cum stains on that photograph?

Posted: Sep 7 2010, 08:04 PM
Rick Bawls, please confirm that you have permanent grooves on your face that formed over the years as you attempted to roughly wipe all of the skidmarks off your face after random dudes squatted over you and dropped shit logs onto your face? You must have rubbed so hard that you permanently damaged layers of skin. Nice going, shithead!

Posted: Sep 13 2010, 04:28 AM
Rick Bawls, remember when you flunked out of high school after your junior year because you failed your Health class? Remember how Health class grade was based on the following percentages:
10% - class participation
25% - final examination
15% - mandatory research paper
50% - cock length

Remember how you poorly you performed on the cock length portion of the class because your 1-cm long cock was so small, resulting in an F for the course?

Man, Canada sure has a fucked-up grading system!

Posted: Sep 14 2010, 06:24 AM
Rick Bawls, which swing technique do you prefer when being whipped in your tiny balls with a car antenna? Do you prefer a level stroke similar to the batting swing of a line drive baseball hitter? Or do you prefer a rising stroke similar to the way one would swing a golf club?

Posted: Sep 16 2010, 06:35 AM
Rick, remember when you legally changed your name from "Rich Dahmer" to "Rick Bawls" after your dad, serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer, was arrested and exposed as a homosexual serial killer? Remember when you drove to the courthouse to change your name and couldn't stop thinking about thinking about cock and thought to yourself that you would love to suck on some hairy and sweaty balls at that moment? Is that why you chose "Bawls" as your new last name? I bet you initially were going to change your name to "Rick Balls" but you thought that was too obviously queer and instead settled on the last name "Bawls." You sure are a faggot!

Posted: Sep 16 2010, 11:05 PM
Rick Bawls, why did you plan the 9/11 attacks? You are one sick fuck!

Posted: Sep 22 2010, 11:05 PM
Rick Bawls, is it true that men in Canada are known for their tiny cocks? Please confirm that a large influx of baby dicked men occurred during the 1960s and 1970s as Canada allowed military draft dodgers to enter the country and gay up Canada. Please confirm that your 1/4 cm long micro-penis is considered to be large by Canadian standards. However, with your microscopic cock, you must feel grossly inadequate when you partake in the gay rest stop scene in the United States!

Posted: Sep 23 2010, 02:00 AM
Rick Bawls probably also flosses his teeth with random pubes he finds on the floor of the rest stop, as is customary in Canada.

Posted: Sep 23 2010, 11:18 PM
Rick Bawls, are faggots allowed to adopt children in Canada? Do you and your gay lover plan to adopt any kids? Is it true that Canada endorses molestation of male children by gay men as a necessary part of the learning and maturing process for boys? Man, Canada sure is a fucked-up country - I cannot believe that they give free reign to deviant queers such as yourself to molest children!

Posted: Sep 24 2010, 04:50 AM
Rick Bawls, how do you sleep when you are at your home in the bathroom stall at the rest stop? Have you installed a hammock or do you sleep right in the floor? Have you made a make-shift blanket from discarded soiled toilet paper? Do you use the toilet seat as a pillow? Does inhaling the stench from the piss and shit stains on the toilet seat help you drift off to sleep? How many men walk into an adjacent stall to take a piss all over the floor? I bet you're soaked with piss by the time you wake up the next morning!

Is it true that the janitor comes in to clean the men's room at 7:00 AM and sweeps pubes and other garbage from the floor under the door of your stall and onto your face?

Posted: Sep 25 2010, 04:13 AM
Rick Bawls, you have probably heard that baseball is America's national pastime. Please confirm that tossing a random stranger's salad is Canada's national pastime.

Posted: Sep 26 2010, 10:33 PM
Rick Bawls, please confirm that you have fallen in love with Rocco, Fagbusters, Dner, and me. Is it true that last month you were in your rest stop stall cracking one off while fantasizing that Rocco and I were spit-roasting you while Fagbusters and Dner took turns kicking you in the ribs and masturbating? Remember how you started moaning and the guy taking a piss at the urinal next to your bathroom stall became irate because you were interrupting his piss? Remember how he was a truck driver and was wearing cowboy boots? Remember when he kicked in the door on your bathroom stall and then kicked you right in the face with his boot? Remember when you started crying and he said he'd give you something to cry about and when shoved your face into the toilet in your stall and started viciously raping you? Remember how the toilet was clogged with several days worth of shit and piss from various drivers? Remember when you inhaled about a gallon of piss and turds as you struggled to breathe? Remember when everyone else in the bathroom started clapping and cheering him on? Remember when the truck driver thrusted harder and harder until he finally pulled out and blew a huge diseased load in your jew-fro? Remember when he then dragged you onto the floor area in front of the urinals? Remember how your ass was bleeding and your hot pink Hypercolor t-shirt was soaked with piss and diarrhea? Remember how a huge turd had dried and was stuck to your forehead? Remember when everyone started pissing on you for the next several minutes? Remember when a Mexican man said, "Hey, he's had enough. Let's dry him off!" Remember when the Mexican man dropped his pants and farted in your face? Remember when he said, "Hey mang, do you like how I just blow-dried your face with my fart?" Remember when several other dudes also ripped ass on you? Remember how the farts did not dry you off and actually made you more soaked than before because they were wet farts?

Remember how despite the violent nature of the attack, you loved every minute of it and have masturbated several times while thinking about when these random men did to you? You sure are a deviant and deranged faggot!

Posted: Sep 27 2010, 07:21 AM
Rick Bawls, have any of your many gay lovers ever used a shoe horn when sliding a table leg into your asshole?

Posted: Sep 30 2010, 06:25 AM
Rick Bawls, remember that time when you contracted the Bubonic plague when you were at the dumpster party behind the Burger King in downtown Toronto last year? Remember when two random dudes were doubling up on you and one of the dudes blew his load in your ass and then grabbed a sewer rat that was in the alley and shoved it up your ass? Remember how the sewer rat was scared when it was shoved up your ass and started clawing as it struggled to breath while trapped in your colon? Remember how much you enjoyed it as the sewer rat moved around inside you and you blew a couple loads with your tiny cock? Remember when the sewer rat eventually suffocated and you shit it out several hours later? Remember how the sewer rat was infected with many diseases, including rabies and the Bubonic plague? Remember when you became deathly ill several days later and told they homeless men in the alley where you were living at the time that you thought you were going to die? Remember how annoying you were being and they raped you completely against your will and farted right in your face and made you eat out their filthy assholes? Remember when a Canadian mountie eventually found you in the alley? Remember how you were asleep at the time? Remember how the mountie woke you up by letting his horse take a huge piss on you? Remember when the mountie then walked you past a house and turned a garden hose on you to clean you up? Remember when he eventually took you to a Canadian hospital for treatment? Remember how the Canadian universal health care program handled your treatment? Remember how glad you were that you lived in a country with "free" health care? Remember how less glad you were when the doctors gave you shots with rusty needles that had just been in a homosexual black crackhead's arm? Remember how you eventually survived the Bubonic plague but became infected with HIV and Ebola as a result of the rusty used needles? You sure had a shitty experience that time!

Posted: Oct 1 2010, 04:36 AM
Rick Bawls, please confirm that you are a child molester, you sick fuck! Is it true that child molestation is permitted and even encouraged in Canada? Remember when your landlord entered your apartment because your toilet was clogged and was dripping down to the floor below? Remember when your landlord noticed pictures of child porn on your computer and called the Canadian mounties to arrest you because she thought that the pictures were illegal? Remember when the mounties arrived and you found out that the pictures were perfectly legal in politically liberal Canada? Remember when you licked the mountie's asshole while he rubbed one out while looking at the child porn? Remember when the mountie blew his load on the floor and you licked it up? Remember when the mountie left and then you went over to your computer and downloaded hardcore gay porn and added it to your blog? Remember when you claimed that the pictures were of Rocco and me? Remember how you assumed that accusing Rocco and me of appearing in the gay porn on your blog gave you a "legitimate" excuse for denying your own latent homosexuality? Remember how you didn't fool anyone, as everyone has known for years that you are a raging queer? You sure were a dirty HIV+ child-molesting faggot that time!

Posted: Oct 1 2010, 04:59 PM
Rick Bawls, when do you think you will finally succumb to the deadly AIDS virus? You must have been anally infected with about 800 different strains by now, you nasty faggot!

Posted: Oct 5 2010, 08:47 AM
Rick Bawls, remember when you were in high school and your dad, Jeffrey Dahmer, would fire his demon seed into your asshole every night during an anal sex session? Remember how much you enjoyed having sex with your dad even though he refused to give you any reach-arounds? Remember that time when he anally impregnated you with a butt baby? Remember how mad that made your dad and he yelled at you and told you that you should have eaten greasy Taco Bell after he blew his load in your ass? Remember when he explained that Taco Bell food would give you diarrhea and the force by which your colon would expel the diarrhea would effectively abort any early stage anal fetuses growing in your asshole? Remember how your dad said he had no other option other than killing the butt baby himself? Remember when he took a coat hanger, unwound the metal, and then started jamming it up your ass in an effort to kill the butt baby? Remember how your dad lacerated your colon and caused your asshole to bleed all over the floor? Remember how mad that made your dad? Remember when he stabbed you in the eye with the coat hanger to teach you not to bleed on his precious floor? Remember how the butt baby eventually dropped out of your colon? Remember when your dad cooked the butt baby in a pot of boiling water and then you and he ate it for dinner? Remember how you are now permanently blind in your left eye and have to wear a diaper at all times as a result of your dad's actions during the abortion procedure? You sure learned not to get pregnant that time!

Posted: Oct 8 2010, 06:58 AM
Rick Bawls, please confirm that the third bathroom stall at the Toronto-area rest stop where you live doubles as a gloryhole. Is it true that hundreds of queers stick their cocks through the holes every day and you suck them off and swallow their loads? Is it true that you also drilled some big holes so that random dudes could stick their filthy sphincters up against the holes for you to toss their salads and lick their assholes clean after they have taking dumps? Do some dudes also fart right in your face while you are licking their dirty buttholes? How many men stick their cocks through the holes and piss on you while you are trying to take a nap? Man, you sure live a shitty life, you dirty fucking STD-ridden faggot!!!

Posted: Oct 17 2010, 07:56 AM
I demand that you answer Rocco's important questions, you Canadian cocksucker!! Also, please confirm that your winter igloo is made from ice blocks that are comprised of 90% piss and 10% fecal matter. I bet you enjoy licking the ice blocks in your igloo from time to time, don't you!!!! Do you even realize that you are comprising the structural integrity of your igloo when you lick the ice block? One day you are going to be crushed under a pile of worn down blocks of frozen piss and shit!

Posted: Oct 18 2010, 07:13 AM
Hey Rick Bawls, remember when you were in swim class in high school and had to shower naked at the end of class? Remember when everyone saw how tiny your cock was and started laughing? Remember when you blamed the cold water and said that your penis is normally huge? Remember when the swim teacher called you "Baby Dick Rick" and everyone started laughing even harder? Remember when the swim teacher started hi-fiving the other kids in the class as you cried in the showers? Remember how every day for the next two years the kids would chant "Baby Dick Rick" whenever you would walk down the school halls? Remember when you finally graduated from high school and were still distraught years later about the nickname and your tiny cock? Remember when you were searching the Internet for gay porn one day and discovered Randy Constan's homepage? Remember how you assumed that he was the one man almost as gay as you who could sympathize with your high school experience? Remember when you began visiting Randy's homepage and jerking off at the homoerotic pictures on that website? Remember how you continued this practice for the next 8 years until you discovered this forum? Remember how you are trying to wean yourself off of Randy Constan and lately have been vigorously jerking off while thinking about Rocco, Fagbusters, Dner, Assvomit, your dad, your uncle, and me? You sure are a demented Canadian faggot!!! Seek professional help immediately!

Posted: Oct 19 2010, 09:04 PM
Rick Bawls, what is your Halloween costume going to be this year? Please confirm that you are going to dress up a urinal again, just like you have done several times since you were a child. When was this childhood picture of you taken?

Posted: Oct 20 2010, 03:57 AM
Rick Bawls, do you remember that scene in "There's Something About Mary" where Chris Elliot told Ben Stiller that he needed to jerk off and lose his load before any big date so that his mind was clear? Please confirm that you follow your own pre-date ritual. Is it true that you shit your pants while on your way to a new date so that you feel relaxed and confident? Man, you are one demented faggot!

Posted: Oct 21 2010, 05:51 PM
Rick, remember when you celebrated your 12th birthday? Remember when you asked for a pinata at your birthday party? Remember how you invited kids from your school but nobody showed because they all hated you? Remember how the only people at your party were your parents and several homeless men who lived in the alleys near your home? Remember when you but on a blindfold and began swinging at the pinata with a stick? Remember how you assumed that the pinata was filled with candy and that you would soon be showered in a sea of Jolly Ranchers and candy bars? Remember when your broke the pinata and were instead showered with piss, semen, and diarrhea? Remember when you took off your blindfold and realize that your parents have given you a fecal jizz pinata? Remember how happy this made you as you started licking a puddle of piss and diarrhea that had dripped out of the pinata? Remember how this was the best birthday party you have ever had? Man, you are one fucked-up Canadian faggot!

Posted: Oct 22 2010, 07:30 AM
Bawls, there was a trend in the U.S. during the late 1980s when everyone wore acid-washed jeans that had a whitish hue as the result of bleaching. Please confirm that Canada has had its own jeans trend. Is it true that the current trend is to wear shit-stained jeans? Is it true the the jeans are manufactured in Mexico at a factory next to the largest Taco Bell in the world? Is it also true that there is no toilet paper in the factory and that the workers are instructed to wipe their asses with denim jeans after taking massive shits so that the jeans will have authentic shit stains? Man, raging queers really set the trends in Canada, don't they, ASS-FUCK!!!

Posted: Oct 25 2010, 07:36 AM
Rick Bawls, how often do you have wet dreams? Do you think about being ass-raped at rest stops during your wet dreams? When you wake up during your wet dreams, are your jammies soaked with your cum stains as a result of being so turned on during those dreams, or are they instead soaked with your piss because you are so frightened during the dreams? Please contact me to discuss.

Posted: Nov 23 2010, 07:31 AM
Rick Bawls, are you going to celebrate Christmas at the rest stop this year? Do you plan on taking a break from eating feces and sucking cock to enjoy a hearty turkey dinner? It must be nice to eat a plate of turkey while sitting in a puddle of piss and pubic hair on the bathroom floor while toilet bugs fly around your plate. It sounds yummy!

Posted: Nov 28 2010, 05:40 PM
Rick Bawls, please confirm that the Canadian government operates its own airline called "Canadian Airlines." Is it true that Canadian Airlines is the largest air carrier in Canada? I heard that Canadian Airlines operates at a huge profit by cutting corners. Please confirm that instead of using heaters to provide heated air to passengers, the airline instead employs a gay man who sitting in the back of the plane while eating Taco Bell tacos. Is it true that a metal pipe is lodged up that man's ass so that when he farts, his warm and wet farts are evenly distributed throughout the passenger cabin to warm everyone? Is it further true that Canadian Airlines is ranked #1 in Queer Bait Quarterly's recent ranking of gay-friendly airlines?

Posted: Nov 29 2010, 11:22 PM
Rick Bawls, is it true that in Canada it is perfectly legal and socially acceptable to marry a fart? What is that all about???

Posted: Nov 30 2010, 02:31 AM
A major source of the recently published classified documents is Bradley Manning, a U.S. soldier who was an intelligence analyst. Manning is a raging homosexual and reportedly wants to have a sex change because he feels like he is a woman trapped in a man's body. This traitorous faggot deserves to be executed for putting American lives and American foreign policy in jeopardy.

Anyway, the descriptions of Bradley Manning remind me of Rick Bawls. Is it possible that Rick Bawls = Bradley Manning? Perhaps this explains Rick Bawls' absence from his pathetic excuse for a blog over the past six weeks.

Posted: Nov 30 2010, 06:29 PM
Hey ass-fuck, please confirm that you enjoy sucking off men suffering from Down's Syndrome. Do you also enjoy it when a couple retards are viciously ass-raping you? Is it true that in Canada the current "hip" trend is to adopt a Down's syndrome man and service the Downer's various penis and ass needs? Man, Canada sure is one fucked-up cesspool!

Posted: Dec 1 2010, 07:39 PM
Rick Bawls, is it true that 95% of Canadians hibernate like bears during the winter? Do you and several other random dudes get naked and pile into an igloo and then wrap a blanket around yourselves? Please confirm that all of the dudes in the igloo form an erotic mishmash of intertwined legs, arms, and crotches. Do you guys rest for a few months while pissing and shitting all over the "man pile" during the hibernation? Is it true that the hibernation period ends in March when the members of the Canadian Parliament piss on the igloo until the ice walls melt? Please get back to me soon, buddy!

Posted: Dec 2 2010, 10:48 AM
Rick Bawls, have you moved bedroom dresser into the men's room where you are living? Is it true that you sit in a stall while sucking cocks inserted through a gloryhole in the stall wall? Is it also true that the door to your stall remains open so that random truckers and other dudes can spray diarrhea and fart and piss on you while you are sucking off other dudes? Is it true that some of the dudes get mad when there is a long line? Please confirm that when the line is very long, some of the truckers enjoy pissing and shitting in the sock drawer of your dresser? Do you like it when a random dude wipes his ass clean with your pillow case - do you have pleasant dreams while sleeping on the floor with your face laying directly on top of a crusty shit stain on the pillow case?

Posted: Feb 8 2011, 07:47 PM
Rick Bawls, how many times a day do you fantasize about sucking off Randy Constan? Do you fantasize about watching Randy have rough anal sex with Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper and then pulling out of Harper's ass and blowing his diseased load in your face? Man, you are one demented Canadian faggot!

Posted: Feb 16 2011, 03:17 AM
Rick Bawls, where have you been for the past few months? Please confirm that one of your trucker clients at the gloryhole where you sell blowjobs and rimjobs kidnapped you, held you captive for 3 months, and made you his sexual slave. Is it true that this was the best and most pleasurable experience in your entire life? Why did you enjoy it so much when he would piss on your face to wake you up and then viciously ass-raped you? Is this type of experience known as a common rite of passage among the large gay population in Canada? Man, you are one dirty faggot!!!

Posted: Feb 17 2011, 04:03 PM
Rick Bawls, please confirm that you were recently promoted to the head cheerleader position at the Highway 401 rest stop in Ontario. Is it true that your job requires you to give encouragement to constipated men walking into stalls and to congratulate men in the middle of taking dumps? Is it true that you say things like "well played, sir," "nicely done," "nice fart," and "that was a lovely diarrhea spray!" Do you ever lick the buttholes of constipated men to help loosen them up to take a shit? Do you enjoy it when some of those dudes "accidentally" expel the contents of their bowels into your mouth while you are licking their nether regions? Please contact me to discuss!

Posted: Feb 18 2011, 10:29 AM
Rick Bawls, please confirm that Toronto has banned urinals at rest stops and in gas station bathrooms. Is it true that men who need to take a leak are supposed to piss on the floor? Is it further true that nobody mops up the piss and that it collects in puddles on the floor until it either evaporates or someone slips on the piss and soaks up piss with their pants? Is it also true that you enjoy sitting on a puddle of piss while random truckers piss on your face and hair? Have you contacted Randy Constan to convince him to piss on you and then anally rape you in front of your uncle and a crowd of random queers gathered at a rest stop bathroom? Please get back to me PRONTO with answers to these important questions, buddy!

Posted: Feb 20 2011, 09:17 AM
Rick Bawls, how often do you prance around in green tights like your hero, Randy Constan? Is it true that you enjoy soaking your tights in a clogged toilet bowl full of piss and shit for 45 minutes prior to wearing them out in public? Does the putrid smell of shit and shit on your tights really turn on the massive gay community of Canada? On average, how long can you wear the piss- and shit-soaked tights in public before you are anally raped? Please get back to me with answers to these important questions, ass-fuck!!!

Posted: Feb 21 2011, 07:52 AM
Rick Bawls, please confirm that the top selling item on eBay in Canada last year was a bag filled with farts. Is it true that over 75 million bags of farts were shipped to different Canadian queers from the factory down in Mexico? Is it true that Mexican men fill up the bags with farts after eating greasy Mexican food? Sounds hot! Man, Canada sure is chock-full of demented faggots!!!

Posted: Feb 23 2011, 10:07 AM
Rick Bawls, how often do you fall asleep and fantasize about riding around on a broomstick with the object of your homosexual affections, Randy Constan? Do these fantasies end with Randy ass-raping you and infecting you with STDs? When you wake up do you discover that you've blown your tiny load in your pants? Please get back to me soon, you dirty faggot!

Posted: Feb 24 2011, 08:03 PM
Rick Bawls, remember that time when you were in high school and were taking your written final examination for Driver's Ed? Remember when your teacher dropped his pants and pissed on your head as you filled out your Scantron sheet with answers to the test? Remember when you asked him to stop and the teacher got mad at you for interrupting the other kids taking the test and gave you a failing grade? Remember when he said that drivers need to learn to focus despite distractions, such as being pissed on, and that his piss was an important part of the class? Remember when you went home crying after receiving your grade and told your dad, Jeffrey Dahmer, that you had failed Driver's Ed? Remember when your dad got upset with you for being such a loser and took out his aggressions by becoming a notorious cannibalistic homosexual serial killer? You really fucked up that time!!

Posted: Mar 1 2011, 07:12 AM
Rick Bawls, please confirm that the gallons of semen that have been pumped up your asshole have backed up into your brain. Is it true that your brain has absorbed the STD-ridden semen resulting in the destruction of many brain cells? Is this why you now have a learning disability? Please get back to me soon, buddy!

Posted: Mar 1 2011, 11:56 PM
Rick Bawls, please confirm that that #1 movie in Canada right now is an art film entitled, "Dudes Taking Dumps." Is it true that this is a 2-hour long film filled with clips of random dudes farting and taking dumps in public rest rooms? Is it also true that 98% of the people who watch this movie in public theaters masturbate during the movie? I further heard that the movie theater operators encourage masturbation by providing free hand lotion samples and instructing patrons to use popcorn grease as lubrication? Do you enjoy watching this movie while sitting on a semen-soaked cushion? Man, Canada sure is a backward country chock-full of deviant queers!

Posted: Mar 5 2011, 09:34 AM
Rick Bawls, when you used to watch your father, serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer, raping a corpse, is it true that you would masturbate vigorously? Is it true that you would fantasize that your dad was having anal sex with you instead of the rotting corpse? Would you come within seconds during while jerking it during your sick homosexual fantasy? Man, you are one demented faggot, but I guess it is par for the course in the homosexual utopia known as Canada!!!

Posted: Mar 7 2011, 06:58 PM
Rick Bawls, is it true that you collaborated with Dustin Diamond and the Muslim community to plan the 9/11 attacks? Man, you are one vile piece of shit!

Posted: Mar 10 2011, 11:29 AM
Rick Bawls, when are you going to come clean and admit that your are an HIV bug chaser? It's already been established that you enjoy listening to random men take dumps and also like it when random queers piss and shit on you and blow their diseased loads into your mouth and ass. I also heard that you like to lick clean the dirty toilet seats at rest stops that have not previously been cleaned in years. You have also made it clear that you have a voluminous collection of hardcore gay pornography that you enjoy reviewing with your uncle with you are both naked and his cock is buried deep in your ass. However, I need you to update us on your quest to contract the deadly HIV virus. Have you made any progress toward your lifelong goal of dying from full-blown AIDS? Please get back to me soon, ass-fuck!!!

Posted: Mar 10 2011, 05:47 PM
Rick Bawls, please confirm that you are one of the faggots dressed up as a woman who is fighting in this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gi2ehhySasc

Is it true that you and those other queers were brawls over who got to receive the first diarrhea spray next to the dumpster in the alley adjacent to that taco restaurant?

Posted: Mar 13 2011, 09:34 AM
Rick Bawls, please confirm that 78% of all of the men in Canada are HIV+. Is it true that the 22% of men who are not HIV+ are treated as outcasts and are shunned by society? Is it true that you and the other men in the 78% of HIV+ group frequently throw rocks and shout anti-heterosexual slurs at the 22% who are not HIV+ even though a majority of men in the 22% are also raging homosexuals like yourself? Please confirm that men without HIV are forced to wear a patch on their clothing identifying themselves as such are are routinely sent to concentration camps for "heterosexual cleansing?" Is it true that the inspiration for the concentration camps was the concentration camps in which Russians, Jews and other political enemies of the Axis Powers were held during WWII? Man, Canada sure is one fucked-up shit hole!!

Posted: Mar 14 2011, 01:26 AM
Rick Bawls, please confirm that only 0.10% of all babies in Canada are born gay. Is it true that the Canadian doctors test for homosexuality? Is it also true that the non-gay babies are sent to re-education camps and are molested until they turn gay? Is this how Canada manages to maintain a homosexuality percentage of 98% within the male population? Is it also true that 99.6% of all babies born in Canada since 1983 have been test tube babies? Is it further true that Canada has banned the birth of women and sells test tube babies containing females to McDonalds, where they are ground up and used within Chicken McNuggets? Please confirm that the test tube babies are raised within the assholes of men until birth.

Man, Canada sure is a queer's utopian paradise!!!

Posted: Mar 14 2011, 07:32 PM
Rick Bawls, why are you such a cum-guzzler?

Posted: Mar 14 2011, 09:23 PM
Bawls, why are you such a piece of shit? Why are you so obsessed with flamboyant queers such as Randy Constan? Why do you lick dirty toilet seats at rest stops after truckers have sat on them while taking massive smelly dumps? When are you going to come out of the closet and admit that you are a homosexual? I know that you feel embarrassed when you get an erection when you hear a random man ripping ass, but you need to be true to yourself and your homosexual desires. You need to stop obsessing over the dudes who post here and go live out your deranged HIV bug-chasing queer fantasies!

Posted: Mar 15 2011, 06:51 AM
Ass-fuck, please describe what went through your mind the first time you were in a public restroom and you saw a strange man watching you piss at the urinal. Remember when he farted and you achieved your first erection? Remember when he pulled down your pants and anally violated you until he blew his load in your ass? Remember how you contracted your first STD from this encounter? Remember when you turned around and saw your dad, Jeffrey Dahmer, jerking off at the sight? Remember when you also noticed your grandmother, who was sitting on a sink while fingering herself? Please confirm that being raped by a stranger at a public restroom is a celebrated "rite of passage" in Canada.

Man, Canada sure is a backward shit-hole!!!

Posted: Mar 16 2011, 09:40 AM
Rick Bawls, please confirm that Canada has banned the use of certain college entrance exams, such as the SAT, designed to measure intelligence and logical reasoning. Is it true that the college entrance exam in Canada consists entirely of the test taker drawing doodles of cocks and gay sex positions while the test proctor rips ass in the test-taker's face. Please confirm that the test concludes when the test proctor takes a dump on the test taker's face. Is the test taker's grade an entirely subjective measure determined by the test proctor based on the test taker's reaction to having a load of warm feces dumped on his/her head? Can the test takers receive extra credit by sucking off the test proctor or letting the proctor piss in their faces? Please get back to me soon, buddy!

Posted: Apr 10 2011, 09:34 PM
Rick Bawls, why won't you deviant Canadian faggots let Corey Haim's body rest in peace? What is wrong with you morons???

Rocco
Posted: Apr 13 2011, 02:25 AM
Rick Bawls, please confirm that there are many different terms for how people use urinals in Canadian bathrooms? Is it true when a dude takes a piss then turns around and takes a shit in a urinal it's called a "double"? Is it true when two dudes both piss in a urinal at the same time while a dude stands in the middle of them and drops a chud into the urinal it's called a "triple"? Please confirm that eating out of a urinal is totally normal in Canada and that if a dude pisses on your head while you're gobbling up a turd out of a urinal it's called a "squirt surprise"? Please confirm that eating a Mexican turd out of a urinal is known as a "hot tamale"? Is it true when a urinal overflows because turds block the urinal drain it's known as a "turd dam" and immediately invokes a slip and slide party in any bathroom where this occurs? What's up with this Rick Bawls? Why is Canada so full of demented faggots?

Posted: Apr 13 2011, 02:37 AM
Man, I need to visit Canada soon to partake in a triple! That would be so hot if another dude and I pissed all over a random stranger who was shitting in a urinal!

I heard that Canadians often use the liquid hand soap dispensers that are large and see-through and are typically glued onto a wall. The big thing now is for someone to drop a deuce into the hand soap dispenser so that random people in the bathroom can see the deuce when they are lathering up their hands with the hand soap. Canadians often shit into hand soap dispensers like the one shown in this picture:

Posted: Apr 13 2011, 07:18 PM
Rick Bawls, what is the hold-up? Why haven't you answered any of the questions in this thread? 463 messages have been posted and almost all of them contain important and serious questions that need to be answered ASAP!

Also, please make the arrangements for Rocco and me to give you a "triple." You need to drop a chocolate hot dog into a urinal while Rocco and I piss all over you! After we are done, we will shove your face into the piss/shit puddle in the urinal to see how long you can hold your breath.

Rocco
Posted: Apr 14 2011, 05:20 AM
Rick Bawls, I demand you promptly respond to Kurt's proposition! Kurt and I will each down multiple 2 liters of soda, while eating massive amounts of Taco Bell before participating in the Triple with you. This way we will have plenty of urine to really coat you with piss while you take a dump in the rest stop urinal! Then as an added bonus I will kick you into the urinal causing your head to land in your turd and our piss. Kurt and I will then execute a "double double" when we both drop trough and fire diarrhea onto your head in the urinal! I imagine this uber hot move will really show you Canadians a thing or two! A quick confirmation would be greatly appreciated as Kurt and my schedule fills up quickly come the summer time!

ROCCO

Posted: Apr 14 2011, 06:36 AM
Rick Bawls, please arrange for this to happen in the men's room at the next Toronto-area wrestling event in which Diamond is scheduled to appear. I heard that things got really hot and nasty with Diamond after he stepped out of the wrestling ring to take a piss after his Toronto wrestling match last month!

Posted: Apr 17 2011, 09:37 PM
Rick Bawls, I just read about one of your beloved former Canadian Air Force Colonel Russel Williams. Not only is he now a convited rapist and murderer, he is also a cross-dresser. Please confirm that he is the most revered man in all of Canada.
http://weirdnewsfiles.com/tag/russell-williams-air-force-colonel/