Old posts from DustinDiamond.com (part 20)

08th March 2007 - 03:18:37 PM

79750 : Kurt Steinberg

Dner, I work out at Ramone's Gym down on 6th Street in Key West. It's just past the White Swallow bar. They validate for the pink parking lot across the street. It's not designated as an all-gay gym, although most of the patrons are flaming.

08th March 2007 - 02:18:21 PM

79746 : Kurt Steinberg

Hey guys, I was at the gym yesterday lifting weights. As usual, I was wearing my Zubaz without underwear. After about 30 minutes of lunges, squats, and leg presses, the entire weight room was beginning to smell like my asshole. So then this weak kid with a giant jew fro walks in and asked me to spot for him on the bench press. This kid was a totall pussy and only put 5lb weights on each side of the bar. Then we started doing a couple reps and was struggling. I knew he would need my help on the third rep and so I immediately dropped my Zubaz and turned around so that my butthole was about 2 inches from his face and ripped a nasty wet fart while he was struggling to lift his rep. He was overcome by my fart and dropped the bar down onto his chest. His hands were occupied trying to lift the bar and I knew he was now defenseless against my aggressions. I then dunked my nuts in his mouth until I blew my load and cleaned his face with a golden shower. A couple other dudes saw what was happening and immediately dropped their shorts and started jerking off. After everyone had blown a few loads, we finally lifted the bar off the little pussy's chest. His ribs were bruised pretty badly, but I think he'll be ok. Unfortunately, I don't think he'll visit my gym again. :(

08th March 2007 - 10:22:53 AM

79744 : Kurt Steinberg

Didn't Screech also get caught licking the skidmarks on Belding's tattered underwear when Belding was swimming a few laps (while completely naked) at the Bayside pool?

07th March 2007 - 08:59:54 PM

79738 : Kurt Steinberg

Hey Turd Ferguson, thanks for the head-up. I definitely plan on watching Diamond's appearances on Celebrity Fit club while I;m completely naked and masturbating. I intend to lose several loads per episode while I watch Diamond's lazy and chunky pale ass get fatter and fatter while the other contestants lose weight during the course of the show. My sofa is bound to have lots of semen stains by the time summer arrives! Thanks Diamond.

07th March 2007 - 08:26:24 AM

79733 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, is it true that your penis is the size of a Tic-Tac, whereas Belding's is the size of a Pringles can?

06th March 2007 - 02:34:53 PM

79730 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, you missed your chance to hook up with this morbidly obese 873-lb woman before she dided. :( You should have hung around the Arby's until she waddled in and hit on her. http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/front/4575169.html

06th March 2007 - 12:11:04 AM

79727 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, let's play "Gym Class." I just made it up. The rules of this game are simple - I roll a kickball across the ground while you chase after it. I will run after you and kick you in your tiny "ball bag" if I catch up to you. I will continue doing this until you pass out. You must be creaming your pants just thinking about playing this game with me!

05th March 2007 - 09:38:47 PM

79725 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, why is your penis so small?

02nd March 2007 - 10:57:17 AM

79699 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, did you ever tell your parents about any of the things that used to happen to you on the rowdy Saved By The Bell set? Did your parents cry or laugh at your tales of Cleveland Steamers, Rusty Trombones, and Arabian Goggles?

01st March 2007 - 11:56:42 AM

79690 : Kurt Steinberg

Deucer, I've often thought about purchasing my own spa for some hot homosexual scat orgies. However, my friend Scott had a scat party in his spa and his spa ended up being ruined because little chunks of shit (and corn and peanuts that were in the shit) clogged up the drainage system and caused thousands of dollars worth of damage. Does one of your buddies lick the shit off of the floor and walls of the spa when you are done? If Diamond would visit you could use his brillo-like jew-fro to scrub down the spa when you are done and to soak up the piss and semen!

28th February 2007 - 01:45:03 PM

79682 : Kurt Steinberg

Dner, I have been to the Pump Room many times in the past. However, my most recent spa experience took place at the Rim Room - I think that both are owned by JM J Bullock. The great thing about the Rim Room is the complimentary Taco Bell food that is great diarrhea fuel. The spa had to be hosed down and bleached when my group was done with it! There's something about rancid feces (and dumpsters) that is an absolutely critical component of a deranged and demented homosexual's lifestyle!

28th February 2007 - 11:48:04 AM

79679 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, I took a train to a well-known gay spa the other day. The train ride was rather unpleasant as a black bum shit his pants, causing the entire train to smell horrible. I'm not positive, but that bum may have been Milo the janitor. Once I arrived at the spa I had to wait around for 15 minutes or so until the daily Saved By The Bell session started. While I was waiting around I ate a few of the complimentary Taco Bell tacos and burritoes that were sitting out on a big tray. When the event was finally starting, a Saved By The Bell DVD was inserted into a DVD player and a disc from the fifth season started playing. I immediately took off my Zubaz pants, as did several other guys (it is a spa club requirement that members must wear Zubaz - preferablyZubaz pants with Skidmarks - when not in the spa). I jumped in the spa along with several other random dudes. There were some obese middle-aged white guys, some chubby mexicans, a japanese dude, a couple skinny koreans, and three filipinos. When "The Fight" episode started playing everyone got really horny and crazy. The mexican guy in front of me dropped a huge shit in the spa and one of the fat middle aged white guys gobbled it down. I personally peed on the filipino in front of me and then sprayed diarrhea all over the spa and started cracking one off. By the time three episodes had played, we were all exhausted and there was about 2 inches of feces and semen floating at the top of the spa water. It was a good time!

27th February 2007 - 04:11:31 PM

79671 : Kurt Steinberg

Belding's farts are very potent and can probably melt lead. The German army would have conquered Europe during WWI if they could have used Belding's asshole as their secret weapon instead of mustard gas!

27th February 2007 - 10:59:50 AM

79665 : Kurt Steinberg

I enjoy the fact that Belding's fart is so nasty that it instantly kills bees. He should bottle his farts and sell them as bug spray. Belding, you're sitting on a goldmine!

26th February 2007 - 11:09:03 AM

79649 : Kurt Steinberg

nelson tejeda, you came to the right place. I'm sure that Diamond will get back to you soon!

25th February 2007 - 09:44:10 PM

79640 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond needs to purchase that robot insurance, because it's only a matter of time until someone finds Kevin and the garbage dump and replaces his old expired batteries with fresh ones. When that happens, he's coming for Diamond's zoinker and brownpipe!

25th February 2007 - 05:20:09 PM

79637 : Kurt Steinberg

Dner, Bradis was so washed up that he actually committed suicide! Will Diamond eventually do the same? I think it's only a matter of time until Diamond receives a prison sentence for tax evasion or something like that and I don't know if he'd be able to survive a prison sentence.

23rd February 2007 - 12:09:18 AM

79610 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, I heard an unbelievably queer song at my gym the other day. It is called "Let Me Borrow That Top" and is sung by a dude who sounds like a raging homosexual. Did you write that song? I immediately thought of your queer ass when it started playing. This is a youtube video of that queer song (the video part has nothing to do with the song): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cgzks4K5kzI

22nd February 2007 - 05:32:43 PM

79606 : Kurt Steinberg

Corey, please gay up the script. It sounds a little too heterosexual for my taste. FYI, I was watching Lucas the other day - wow was your character a little homo in that flick!

22nd February 2007 - 10:54:36 AM

79601 : Kurt Steinberg

Bruce, I thought that your new movie was supposed to be called "Live Free or Die Hard." Remember that scene in the original Die Hard where you put some C-4 explosives on an office chair, tied a computer monitor to the top of the chair and then threw it down an elevator shaft and whole thing exploded when it hit the elevator down below? You should have put an alternate scene on the DVD where instead of puting the C-4 on the chair you put it in Screech's rectum (maybe Screech was hiding in the building to get away from Belding) and then threw Screech down the elevator shaft. When Screech blew up you should have been masturbating while standing in the open elevator shaft and then you could blow your load on screech's burnt corpse hundreds of feet below.

22nd February 2007 - 12:38:55 AM

79589 : Kurt Steinberg

Hey Diamond, we need to hook up. I still want you to French kiss my asshole while I'm in the middle of taking a shit. The thought of your tongue touching my sphincter while a big meatly Taco Bell induced turd is being forced out really turns me on. Let's have sex!

21st February 2007 - 07:02:06 PM

79588 : Kurt Steinberg

Let's meet at the Denny's at 6100 Suset Boulevard in Hollywood. Here is a map: http://web.sa.mapquest.com/dennys/advantage.adp?transaction=locmap&recordId=258&pwidth=400&pheight=250

21st February 2007 - 06:57:05 PM

79587 : Kurt Steinberg

We've meeting behind the Denny's on the Sunset Strip in West Hollwood. 2-4 dudes can go the bathrooms inside the Denny's for some hot scat play and the rest of us will engage in watersports and unprotected buttsex out back by the dumpsters while HIV juice is flying every which way!

21st February 2007 - 09:49:19 AM

79570 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, you should rip off Haim's idea and make your own movie. You could call it "Zoinks!," "How Screech Lost His Heterosexuality," of "Jew Bastard." Please include a scene where Milo kidnaps you and takes you to the 'hood where you are sodomized by several illiterate HIV+ janitors. You should also include a scene where you go to a Mexican restaurant and someone from the cleaning service you complained about on your Myspace blog recognizes you. It would be awesome if they dragged you into the kitchen and beat you with mops, stuck some discarded burritoes up your brownpipe and then hanged you from the ceiling and pretended you were a pinata and whacked you with sticks and chairs for 45 minutes until you passed out.

20th February 2007 - 11:32:48 PM

79561 : Kurt Steinberg

Corey Haim, please add a Taco Bell scene to Fart Patrol 2. I was disappointed when there wasn't one in the original. Is Feldman going to make a cameo appearance in the sequel? What about Dustin Diamond? I think it would be funny if you include a scene where you behind the Taco Bell and have to walk past a couple dumpsters to get to the entrance. As you walk past the dumpsters the camera pans down and shows that Dustin Diamond is being brutally sodomized by a couple dirty and diseased homeless men! What do you think about using a scene like that?

Old posts from DustinDiamond.com (part 19)

19th February 2007 - 06:30:20 PM

79538 : Kurt Steinberg

Ray, I think that Diamond created this website himself. The problem is that he was using a 1990 Packard Bell computer that is horribly out of date. The computer locks up periodically because of all of the virsuses on it (Diamond must not have anti-virus software). I think he tried to correct the spelling a number of times only to become frustrated when his computer locked up on him. His modem is something like 4800 baud - it took him 15 minutes to upload the picture on the main page! Give the guy a break - he did the best he could do with the only materials he could afford.

19th February 2007 - 12:10:20 AM

79534 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, I have an important and serious question for you - when some random dude sticks Skittles up his asshole and then farts them out toward your mouth, do any Skittles ever accidently hit you in your eyes? If so, does it hurt or rupture any blood vessles? Please get back to me soon buddy!

18th February 2007 - 09:46:36 PM

79533 : Kurt Steinberg

Rocco and jewvebeenframed, listen to the "Bright" Jerky Boys clip on the Jerky Boys myspace page: http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=141793655 It's one of my favorite clips from the Jerky Boys.

16th February 2007 - 02:23:20 PM

79515 : Kurt Steinberg

I saw the Jerky Boys movie in the theatre when it first came out back in 1995. Rocco, I think I also heard the bootleg tapes. There was a clip where the calleer is supposed be Indain or an arab and calls up some Italian guy in the middle of the night asking him to turn down the music. When the guy who was called says he doesn't know what the guy is talking about, the caller goes into a rant, calling him a "Ginny motherfucker" and tells him to meet him on the front lawn in a few minutes to get his ass kicked. Funny shit. You can still find most of the clips on file sharing programs. They did an awesome one a few years ago where Sol Rosenberg called up a beauty salon to complain about a haircut given to Gary Del'Abate (from the Howard Stern Show). That was one of the best ones I have ever heard. Howard Stern loved it.

16th February 2007 - 12:54:04 PM

79512 : Kurt Steinberg

Queers, were any of you fans of the Jerky Boys? I found some Jerky Boys clips on youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j3_NhDYmANA&NR http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AQ2NFwfk7NA&mode=related&search= http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3kJ7aK-sDIw

16th February 2007 - 10:16:19 AM

79511 : Kurt Steinberg

Hey fucko (message 79509), I'm going to make you a slave of my cock! I'll give you something to bitch about when I pull it out of the butthole of a dude who is dressed up like Screech and make you lick off the Screech's shit. The Screech will then fire his HIV+ seed down your throat while I kick you in the junk and stomp on your tiny balls. You're going down!

14th February 2007 - 03:21:56 PM

79487 : Kurt Steinberg

Rocco, I also added this one last year: http://www.2secret.com/secret_50379.aspx

14th February 2007 - 12:13:12 PM

79482 : Kurt Steinberg

It would be awesome if someone did this to Diamond: http://www.2secret.com/secret_45655.aspx

14th February 2007 - 11:12:55 AM

79479 : Kurt Steinberg

Hey Swedish dipshit below, quit posting your crap here. Nobody cares about your anti-slavery propaganda. This website was set up for one reason and only one reason - for Diamond's gay fans to exchange queer fantasies about him. It's hard to find hot spank material when you post inane messages here. And why are you posting in Swedish - none of the queers who post here can read Swedish. I'm going to call up Belding and he's going to smash your nuts with a tire iron and fart in your mouth until lungs fill completely up with his farts. Then he will light a match and cut open your chest cavity. As the smelly excapes from your collapsed lungs your whole torso will ignite in flames! What do you think about that your fucking piece of shit?

13th February 2007 - 11:17:12 AM

79465 : Kurt Steinberg

Hey anti-slavery movement, you think that everyone in jail is a "slave"? How dare we arrest and jail people for murder and theft. Guess what, faggot? How about we get together and play "prison." I'm going to squirt my load in your eye and take a dump in your mouth!

13th February 2007 - 12:37:21 AM

79461 : Kurt Steinberg

This secret posting website is funny: http://www.2secret.com I added this secret last year: http://www.2secret.com/secret_50493.aspx And this one today: http://www.2secret.com/secret_72961.aspx

12th February 2007 - 09:24:13 PM

79460 : Kurt Steinberg

There's a fat black guy that works out at the same gym as me. He's kind of funny - whenever he finishes a set of reps he typically says something like "aw shit." It totally reminds me of Deucer's "remember when..." story where Milo was raping Screech and then yelled out "aw shit! Milo gots ta cum!"

12th February 2007 - 04:37:59 PM

79458 : Kurt Steinberg

Dner, do you know if Diamond accepts Burger King bathroom tokens as payment? I'm not sure if they technically constitute "curreny," but I know he can meet some nice ass in one of those places.

12th February 2007 - 04:02:06 PM

79456 : Kurt Steinberg

Dner, thanks for the clarification. I wonder if Diamond accepts foreign currency when someone is paying Diamond for degradation purposes. If Diamond were charging 15 U.S. cents to allow someone to spray a Taco Bell shit on his face I think I would slip in a few Canadian cents just to piss off Diamond.

12th February 2007 - 03:42:26 PM

79453 : Kurt Steinberg

Stefan, I'm not even sure what 500 quid is. However, I'd bet that Diamond would let you piss all over him if you give him a few half eaten french fries that you find in the dumpster behind a McDonald's.

12th February 2007 - 12:06:34 PM

79449 : Kurt Steinberg

Screech, do you remember that time when Belding dressed you up as a urinal for Halloween and then took you to a costume party and glued you to the floor of the bathroom? Everyone peed all over you before the night was over.

08th February 2007 - 03:59:10 PM

79421 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamondcutter, do you think the heirs of her 90-year-old former husband took her out after she made off with her inheritance? Maybe they poisoned she and her son.

08th February 2007 - 12:10:06 AM

79414 : Kurt Steinberg

Hey Dustbin Diamond, what happened with your whole mortgage scam? You should go to jail for that and share a cell with Richard Hatch from Survivor. I'm sure he'd have fun with you against your will.

07th February 2007 - 01:41:25 PM

79412 : Kurt Steinberg

Rosinha, this is a QUEERS-ONLY message board. Take your Swedish spam elsewhere! This for was created as a masturbatory aid for Dustin Diamond's queer fans to come and find hot spank material. If you don't want to wipe your ass with Diamond sexy jew-fro or fire our seed in his pube goatee, then you should probably stop posting here.

06th February 2007 - 06:57:30 PM

79396 : Kurt Steinberg

Gay this up: http://bonijergen.proboards45.com/index.cgi?board=dating

31st January 2007 - 09:23:18 PM

79357 : Kurt Steinberg

79356, how dare you suggest that something is wrong with the queers who post here! Homosexuals visit this guestbook to find hot spank material. This website is chock full of queer fantasies involving Screech and the rest of the Bayside gang. I have lost 1037 loads while reading gay fantasies here over the past 4 years. I keep track of the loads lost in a journal and store the semen that has been ejaculated in a nice big jar. I'd be willing to sell the jar to you on eBay if you are interested. Let me know.

13th December 2006 - 09:07:25 AM

79271 : Kurt Steinberg

Look at this recent picture of Leanna Creel (Tori): http://www.geocities.com/sbtb_fanatic/sundance.jpg She looks beaten-down! What in the hell happened to her?

12th December 2006 - 11:26:03 PM

79266 : Kurt Steinberg

Pauly Shore is almost as big of a loser as Diamond. He deserves this profile: http://washedupcelebrities.blogspot.com/2006/12/pauly-shore.html

12th December 2006 - 04:26:03 PM

79264 : Kurt Steinberg

Look at this video of Pauley Shore getting his ass kicked while performing his stand-up routine at a comedy club in Texas. He must have totally sucked or been extremely unfunny (very easy to believe), because the crowd was cheering about he was punched. http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-4076863223883966153 I'm shocked that someone has not yet done this to Diamond. I remember reading that someone hit Diamond in the face or on the head with a glass bottle when Salty the Pocketknife was performing, but as far as I know, he hasn't received a beating during his stand-up routine.

11th December 2006 - 12:10:26 AM

79249 : Kurt Steinberg

arbys shitpipe, you raise good points. I totally forgot about the curly fries that Diamond almost certainly scrafs down at Arby's. Does anyone know if Belding used to make Diamond eat curly fries out of his asshole?

10th December 2006 - 03:12:26 PM

79246 : Kurt Steinberg

Did anybody watch the NFL pregame show in Fox this morning? Every week there's a comedian who does funny little skits about the guys on the show (e.g., Howie Long, Jimmy Johnson, Terry Bradshaw, etc.) The comedian was talking about Howie Long's movie career and how awful he was as an actor. At the end of the segment he posted 4 game picks of the week. He posted each pick along with a picture of an actor that he said was better than Howie Long. On one of the picks he showed a picture of Ernest (from "Ernest Goes t Camp," etc.). For his next pick he showed a pciture of a young Dustin Diamond along with his game pick. I almost lost it because that so funny!

09th December 2006 - 09:44:13 PM

79243 : Kurt Steinberg

I think that fucker tried to out us a couple months ago.

08th December 2006 - 09:59:51 PM

79240 : Kurt Steinberg

Thanks Gay Zack! http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/1208062screech1.html

08th December 2006 - 12:33:10 PM

79237 : Kurt Steinberg

Deucer, there has been a fat bald guy hanging out on Key West the dumpster circuit over the past few weeks. He was always doubling up on a Screech with an A.C. Slater. He looked vaguely familiar, but I didn't know why. Now I realize that he's a Coach Sonski.

07th December 2006 - 11:14:51 PM

79233 : Kurt Steinberg

Hey queers, I found some good spank material. Here are pictures of Coach Rizzo: http://kurtsteinberg.blogspot.com/2006/12/coach-rizzo.html Here are pictures of the wrestling coach, Coach Sonski. Coach Sonski is the coach I remember who used to rub his bald head all over Belding's taint and team up with Ox to spit-roast Screech: http://kurtsteinberg.blogspot.com/2006/12/coach-sonski.html

07th December 2006 - 04:46:29 PM

79232 : Kurt Steinberg

Fellow queers, I'll get some pictures of Coach Rizzo for you to look at while spanking it!

07th December 2006 - 01:52:31 PM

79229 : Kurt Steinberg

Go to the online section: http://www.glossaryofperversion.com/TheListA.html I want to give Diamond a "Rusty Fish Hook." That's where I'm doing a dude in the butt and get some shit on my finger. I then reach around and "hook" the dude's mouth like as though I have caugh a fishyou got a bass on your finger.

07th December 2006 - 12:57:44 PM

79228 : Kurt Steinberg

Have you queers seen the "Glossary of Perversion"? It lists some good sex moves. http://www.glossaryofperversion.com/ "Bill Buckner" - While receiving head standing up, the girl cuts off your balls and rolls them through your legs. I've been known to participate in an "anal boot" from time to time: An anal boot is when you take a pitcher of beer, everyone spits in it, someone stirs it with their cock, and then the mixture is poured through the crack of a man's ass into the waiting mouth of the loser of a bet or drinking game.

07th December 2006 - 12:52:39 PM

79227 : Kurt Steinberg

Was Coach Rizzo the bald guy?

07th December 2006 - 09:52:42 AM

79224 : Kurt Steinberg

Deucer, has anyone ever mentioned Coach Rizzo in a "remember when..." gay fantasy? I sure don't remember one, and I've probably read them all while cracking one off.

07th December 2006 - 07:57:51 AM

79222 : Kurt Steinberg

Deucer, I almost forgot about Coach Rizzo! Didn't he and his star athlete, Ox, rape a bunch of students at Bayside? I heard that Coach Rizzo is in prison right now. Apparently he's a "wolf" in prison, raping all of the dudes in there.

06th December 2006 - 11:34:57 AM

79215 : Kurt Steinberg

Gay Zack, those Slaters are always violent homosexual predators. There's something about a greasy permed mullet that brings out the worst in a gay man. :( You should move on, as your older queen is no longer of use to you anymore. His asshole was probably the only thing keeping the two of you together.

Old posts from DustinDiamond.com (part 18)

05th December 2006 - 11:36:27 PM

79208 : Kurt Steinberg

Dner, I hear you. Some people just don't understand the queer lifestyle and how piss, shit, and HIV+ semen is an intergral part of our lives. I've also participated in piss and shit parties over the years. However, you should consider purchasing a spa. Spas are great because you can dose off in them while piss, shit, and semen is floating around in the water with you! Diamond apparently agrees: http://www.dustindiamondfoundation.com/dustinjennhottub.jpg

05th December 2006 - 06:04:10 PM

79204 : Kurt Steinberg

Dner, drop a deuce on one of those dudes for me. It kind of reminds me of when I was in college and had a roommate. My roommate and I were having a fued - he was being a little bitch and kept complaining because I wanted to watch gay porn all day and fire my loads on the floor. (He slipped on one during the spring semester and was so pissed at me!) Anyway, I slept on the top bunk and he slept on the bottom bunk. During the last day of the spring sememster I had already moved out all of my stuff to my car to drive home and then I suck back into the room where my roommate was taking a nap after his last final exam. I had just eatne Taco Bell and quietly dropped my pants and then positioned my butthole right above my roommate's head and unleashed a diarrhea tsunami of epic queer proportions! I quickly ran out of the room as my roommate was quite pissed when he woke up and discovered chunks of shit in his eyes. He transferred to a different college for the next semester and I never saw him again. :(

05th December 2006 - 05:20:51 PM

79201 : Kurt Steinberg

Dner, you must prod Fagbusters to acquire Internet access. I think that most of the queers who post here miss his condemnations of our dangerous homosexual lifestyles.

05th December 2006 - 04:21:38 PM

79200 : Kurt Steinberg

What does 1337 mean? Is that some kind of nerd code? Please refrain from using terminology that most of Diamond's queer fans don't understand.

05th December 2006 - 09:36:16 AM

79195 : Kurt Steinberg

Dner, what happened to Fagbusters? He rarely posts anymore.

04th December 2006 - 11:50:43 PM

79185 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, I want to play a game with you. It's called the "Kurt Steinberg game." The rules of this game are simple - you need to ingest everything that comes out of my asshole, whether it be diarrhea, a meaty turd, or a gerbal. If you fail to ingest something, I'll kick you in the junk with steel-toed boots. If you guess correctly, on the other hand, I'll reward you by sodomizing you with a softball bat. Are you interested in playing this game with me?

04th December 2006 - 05:58:11 PM

79183 : Kurt Steinberg

arbys shitpipe, I remember reading Goldberg's response to Diamond's appeal in the UDRP arbitration action. Goldberg actually wrote this: "The complaint is without merit. It is a heavy-handed attempt to use money and celebrity�albeit an exceedingly limited kind of celebrity�to suppress artistic freedom and the well-established First Amendment right to create and disseminate parodies of those who are famous, powerful or otherwise in the public eye. This right has been defended by ICANN itself, which specifies that use of domains for parody purposes is in fact a good faith use." "Mr. Goldberg created dustindiamond.com in 2001 as an insightful parody of the growing social phenomenon of �has-been-itis.� The site makes fun of the increasingly common spectacle of minor celebrities clinging to the vestiges of their fame long after their moment in the spotlight has passed. An integral component of his parody installation is the wide array of voices�from the public at large�in the free speech forum provided by the site guest book." http://www.dustindiamond.com/udrp/Official_Response.pdf

04th December 2006 - 09:35:40 AM

79177 : Kurt Steinberg

Double D, please enlighten us. How exactly are you going to collect IP addresses (not ISPs) when you aren't the owner of this website and the real owner, Max Goldberg, apparently hates you? You already got your ass handed to you in 2004 by the UDRP arbitration board, are you thirsty for more? You do realize that you'll have to subpoena the IP addresses of the people who post here, don't you? Courts don't simply hand those over absent a strong showing that you have a cause of action against people who post here. So what's your cause of action "Double D"? Oh wait, you don't hace one, do you?

04th December 2006 - 08:43:48 AM

79175 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, let's hook up soon. I want to share a romantic kiss with you. Actually, I want you to kiss my asshole right when a meaty turd is being expelled. You must be creaming your pants just thinking about this tremendous offer! Let's get together.

01st December 2006 - 11:27:19 AM

79157 : Kurt Steinberg

Screech, I watching the Spice channel the other day when I saw the classic Saved By The Bell episode where Belding raped you for the first time. It was in that episode where you first said "zoinks." About every 5 seconds you yelled out "zoinks" while Belding had his fun. You were saying "zoinks...zoinks...zoinks...zoinks...zoinks...zoinks" while Belding yanked on your jew-fro and pounded away on you.

01st December 2006 - 09:27:45 AM

79155 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, thank you for finally bringing back your website. I was so disappointed last week when I couldn't find any hot Diamond-related queer spank material. I'm ashamed to say that I almost broke down and had sex with a woman. You must be disappointed in me. :(

22nd November 2006 - 09:57:09 AM

79135 : Kurt Steinberg

Deucer, I loved all of the episodes where Uncle Leo had sex with Jerry. Do you remember the episode where Newman took a shit in Jerry's sink and Uncle Leo rubbed it all over his bald head? Kramer held a knife to Jerry's throat and made Jerry lick clean Uncle Leo's head! I shot my load across the room when I saw that scene.

20th November 2006 - 05:57:06 PM

79117 : Kurt Steinberg

This clip is even better than the previous one. Screech almost cries when the radio host plays a clip from another stand-up comic who goes off about what a crappy comic Screech is. Screech is on the line with his R&B singer friend named "Fabian." the radio hosts go off on what a homo Screech's friend Fabian is: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=otWVPRV18IA

20th November 2006 - 05:41:55 PM

79116 : Kurt Steinberg

Watch this video of Diamond talking about his sex video. You can totally tell he's lying his ass off when he says he is not behind its distribution and that it took place 4 years ago. He also claims that he doesn't even remember where the video was recorded. His heffer actually looks pretty embarassed about the whole deal: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=12c6zGBHwE8

20th November 2006 - 04:52:42 PM

79114 : Kurt Steinberg

This could use a good queering: http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/index.php/Saved_by_the_Bell#Screech_Powers

17th November 2006 - 05:10:35 PM

79086 : Kurt Steinberg

Check this out: http://www.tv.com/celebrity-fit-club/show/20431/celebrity-fit-club-5/topic/9524-298273/msgs.html According to that forum, Diamond's chunky ass is supposed to appear on Celebrity Fit Club 5. Imagine how much spank fodder his appearance will provide for all of the queers who post here! Is there any doubt that Diamond will "dork it up" on that show?

17th November 2006 - 02:46:35 PM

79084 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, is it true that Mr. Belding was a substitute teacher for your Bayside Science class one time in the early 1990s when Mr. Dewey was sick? Is it further true that Belding was teaching a class on optics and refraction? I seem to recall that he took the whole class outside on a sunny April day and made you drop your pants and lie on the ground. He then pulled out a magnifying lens and positioned it to focus light from the sun's rays directly onto your ding dong. The focused light acted much like a laser and quickly lit your wang on fire and smoke came off your brunging flesh. That was a cool episode.

16th November 2006 - 11:45:37 PM

79069 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamondcutter, I'll get working on a dirty sanchez program for Kevin the Robot. I don't know who wrote the first program I posted below, but it wasn't me. Maybe it was Deucer?

16th November 2006 - 06:52:28 PM

79062 : Kurt Steinberg

Those routines were obviously written for Kevin the Robot, not me.

16th November 2006 - 06:45:51 PM

79061 : Kurt Steinberg

Bzzzt!!! Bzzzt!!! Screech, I found some old program code for the sodomy routines you wrote for me. Bzzzt!!! First program: > INITIATE SODOMY MODE > TARGET="SCREECH" > SPEECH MODE - SAY "MUST SODOMIZE SCREECH" > REPEAT > LOCATE AND DETAIN TARGET > TARGET HELD > IGNORE PROTESTATIONS OF TARGET > INITIATE ERECTION PROCEDURE > PROCEDURE COMPLETE > COMMENCE INSERTION > THRUST > WITHDRAW > THRUST > WITHDRAW > THRUST > WITHDRAW > THRUST > SPEECH MODE "ZOINKS...I'M GONNA CUM!" > COMMENCE EJACULATION PROCEDURE > COMMENCE EJECTION OF WASTE LIQUIDS > PROCEDURE COMPLETE > DONKEY-PUNCH TARGET > INITIATE CIGARETTE-SMOKING MODE Second program: 100 //COMMENT: THIS PROGRAM INITIATES A HOT SCAT AND RAPE MODE// 105 //COMMENT: � 2005, KURT STEINBERG// 110 ACTIVATE METAL CLAWS 115 //COMMENT: FECES ACQUISITION SUBROUTINE// 120 TARGET = SLATER 125 ANNOUNCE "MUST ACQUIRE DIARRHEA SPECIMEN FROM SLATER" 130 DETAIN TARGET WITH METAL CLAWS 135 FORCE BURRITOS AND EX-LAX DOWN TARGET'S THROAt 140 REMOVE TARGET'S BAGGY ACID-WASHED JEANS 145 INSERT FUNNEL BELOW TARGET'S BUTTHOLE 150 COLLECT DIARRHEA SPECIMEN FROM TARGET 155 STORE DIARRHEA SPECIMEN IN METAL CHEST 160 //COMMENT: FECES ACQUISITION COMPLETE// 165 TARGET = SCREECH 170 ENTER HIBERNATE MODE 175 DARKNESS DETECTED? 180 IF NO, GOTO 175 182 IF YES, GOTO 185 185 //COMMENT: DARKNESS DETECTED, TIME TO ATTACK SLEEPING SCREECH// 190 ROLL OVER TO SIDE OF TARGET'S BED 195 GRAB TARGET'S GONZO NOSE WITH 1ST METAL CLAW 200 IGNORE CRIES FOR HELP FROM TARGET 205 CUT THROUGH TARGET'S ZUBAZ WITH 2ND METAL CLAW 210 ERECT AND EXTEND METAL PENIS 215 BOUNCE TARGET UP AND DOWN ON METAL PENIS 220 RECTAL BLEEDING DETECTED? 225 IF NO, GOTO 215 230 IF YES, EJACULATE OILY LOAD INTO TARGET 235 PULL TARGET ONTO FLOOR 240 EJECT STORED DIARRHEA SPECIMEN ONTO TARGET'S POOFY AFRO 245 PICK UP TARGET WITH METAL CLAWS AND THROW DOWN STAIRS 250 ENTER HIBERNATE MODE 255 END

16th November 2006 - 05:01:54 PM

79059 : Kurt Steinberg

Look at this picture of Diamond. Diamond appears to be locked up in some kind of cage or make-shift prison at Belding's home: http://legionsofthenight.com/dustinand13h.jpg

16th November 2006 - 04:55:44 PM

79058 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, you look like a total fat-ass and your jew-fro looks really oily in this photo: http://www.meetin.org/files/news/7650.JPG

16th November 2006 - 12:31:57 AM

79048 : Kurt Steinberg

Renee, this website is for queer fans of Dustin Diamond. There are many demented homosexuals who grew up watching Saved By The Bell while jerking off to Screech. I personally would like to meet Diamond face-to-face in a spa. He could reminisce about the old days until I get tired and then take a shit in the spa. I would then get out and piss in Diamond's jew-fro and fart in his mouth while Diamond attempts to evade the turds that are floating all around him.

15th November 2006 - 03:19:57 PM

79042 : Kurt Steinberg

Check this out: http://www.marksfriggin.com/news06/11-13.htm "Dustin Diamond's Home Sex Tape Clips. 11/13/06. 9:50am After that Howard said he finally saw the home porn movie that Dustin ''Screech'' Diamond was in. He said he thought that he was going to see a huge penis in the clip but when he saw the movie he didn't think it was all that big. JD came in and said he saw the movie but it appeared to have a huge head on it but an average length. Howard said he's got about 6 inches himself and Screech's didn't look much bigger than his. Howard said he thinks that Screech is about 6 1/2 inches, that's it. Howard described what he saw in the movie. He said the chicks were kind of cute. He played some audio clips from the movie where Screech was asking the girls some questions about what they have pierced and if he can see their boobs. He got one of the girls to pull up her top. He had to beg the girl to show him. Howard said there was a lot of talking during that movie. Screech asked the girls if they wanted to see his monster. One girl said she wanted to see it so he had her ''take the beast out.'' He then had her ''go to work'' on him. JD said that there's a lot of that going on in the movie and there's no cum shot or anything. Fred played JD's techno theme song as the guys goofed on him about that comment. Artie said he's never watched a porno and asked where the cum is. JD said that some guys want to see that kind of thing. JD walked out after that. Howard played another clip where Screech was talking as two girls were getting it on. He wouldn't shut up and Howard said he's just like his character Screech in the movie and it's no wonder people don't want to sleep with him. "

15th November 2006 - 10:11:18 AM

79037 : Kurt Steinberg

I saw this post at http://www.glamsu.com/bulletin/YaBB.cgi/YaBB.cgi?board=SU;action=display;num=1163424888 : Posts: 25 Re: Screech � Reply #7 on: Nov 14th, 2006, 2:20pm � Quote Modify -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- There have been rumours, started by the Mississippi Journal Sentinal that the whole thing was a hoax anyway because the money he's raised so far for his house (as he said himself on Sunday night) hasn't been recieved by his creditors yet

15th November 2006 - 10:04:35 AM

79036 : Kurt Steinberg

Deucer, that's a great find. It's funny that Diamond now tries to sell his porn during his visits to college campuses. I'd be shocked if anyone bought a copy. Seriously, how embarassed would you be if you actually tried to buy porn directly from Diamond?

14th November 2006 - 03:25:56 PM

79024 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, please contact IMDB and ask them to stop deleting posts. Too many hot posts on the boards for you, Michael Oliver, Chris Burke, and toher boards have been deleted recently. In fact, just yesterday I posted a serious question on the "Harold and Maude" board. I simply asked whether the 80-year old granny in that movie gave the young 20-year kid a rusty trombone. The IMDB fascists deleted that post for some unknown reason!

14th November 2006 - 11:58:47 AM

79021 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, I was watching "Prison Break" yesterday and there was a scene where the old ex-prison guard was about to pay a call girl $750 to give him a Cleveland Steamer. Since you're running low on cash, I bet you'd allow an old man to give you a Cleveland Steamer for a mere $15!

14th November 2006 - 10:58:32 AM

79020 : Kurt Steinberg

Rocco, it would be pretty hot if Belding fired Screech out of the space shuttle without a space suit. I'd bet that Belding would be vigoruously jerking off while Diamond's eyes explode and the rest of his body puffs up as it adjusts to zero atmospheric pressure and Diamond becomes asphyxiated in the vacuum of outer space! Maybe some martians would rescue Diamond and take them on board their mother ship for an anal probe. Perhaps they would add Diamond to their intergallactic zoo?

Old posts from DustinDiamond.com (part 17)

13th November 2006 - 02:02:39 AM

79000 : Kurt Steinberg

Hey faggots, check this out: http://www.savedbythesmell.net/ Didn't Howard Stern or someone else say that the women in Diamond's "Saved By The Smell" video were supposed to be "hot"? The women on the cover of Diamond's video are obviously fat and butt-ass ugly! Does he honestly think that telling everyone that he had dirty sex with two obese hogs somehow makes him "cool." Geez - he can't even afford attractive hookers. Those actually look like the type of women I would expect to see with Diamond. Before I turned gay I used to see fat bitches like that at the bar scene. I never tried to hit on them or even talk to them because fat chicks never did it for me. And then I saw Diamond on SBTB and became a raging queer.

12th November 2006 - 10:05:59 PM

78998 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, has Mr. Belding ever lodged a table leg in your rectum? I'll bet that he probably has. I could see him using a shoe horn to guide the table leg right into your "nether regions."

11th November 2006 - 07:19:06 PM

78990 : Kurt Steinberg

Marcia, you're full of shit. Leave and don't come back. Diamond is a penniless nerd and is unable to afford a "team of lawyers." He tried unsuccessfully to acquire this website in 2004, as discussed in this press release: http://www.prweb.com/releases/2004/4/prweb118385.htm

10th November 2006 - 03:38:18 PM

78971 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, we need to hook up for sweaty unprotected butt-sex. There's a new gay bar that just opened up in Key West called the "HIV Room"!!!! I really want to take you there this weekend. Saturday night is "circle jerk" night. There's gonna be so much HIV+ semen flying around at the HIV Room tonight. I hope you're thirsty or hungry - feel free to gobble it down. :)

10th November 2006 - 10:51:06 AM

78967 : Kurt Steinberg

Screech, is it true that after the daily rapings at the hands of Belding, Tuttle, and Slater, that your colon is so damaged that it now extends out of your ass and hangs like the tonuge of a tired dog?

10th November 2006 - 12:37:39 AM

78965 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, I think it would be funny if you lost your house and had to go on welfare. Someone should make a reality show about your ordeal when you have no other options but to live in a housing project. It would be awesome if the housing project were in the inner city of Milwaukee, Compton, Cleveland, or possibly even Chicago. It would be perfect if you were living in a 99% minority housing project. Watching a reality show of the other housing project residents messing with you as you fear for your life would be an interesting show. Maybe then you'll think about some of the dumb decisions you've made with your money.

09th November 2006 - 01:16:57 AM

78959 : Kurt Steinberg

Rocco and Dner, I've encountered many demented faggots who get off on the smell of a nasty fart. The other day I was at the Gold's Gym lifting weights while wearing my blue and white patterned Zubaz pants (without underwear, of course). I had eaten some nasty South American food for lunch that day and it did not agree with my bowels. While I was doing some bench-press reps, I accidently ripped a nasty, smelly, wet fart and had to stop my set to run into the bathroom! Some diarrhea soaked through my Zubaz and got on the bench. After cleaning my ass in the bathroom for about 15 minutes, I returned to the weightroom and caught two dudes (one black guy and one asian guy) rubbing their cocks in the diarrhea and tossing off. Those were two sick sons-of-bitches!

08th November 2006 - 04:29:27 PM

78953 : Kurt Steinberg

Rocco, the advancements in voting technology are unfortunate developments for hedonistic queers like us. I voted yesterday right after eating some Taco Bell. Although I didn't get any butt-sex in the voting area, I did drop ass while I was in line. It was loud and smelled so bad. There was another queer behind me in line. That queer had a big jew-fro and was wearing Zubaz pants! He dropped his pants after I farted and started jerking off. Unfortunately, he was quickly escorted out of the voting area. :(

08th November 2006 - 11:51:18 AM

78947 : Kurt Steinberg

That's in the UK, so I won't be able to make it. :( I'm sure that there must be many UK queers who post here - one of you should take a dump in Diamond's mouth in my honor!

07th November 2006 - 05:53:12 PM

78936 : Kurt Steinberg

As far as I can tell, this was the first post where I made it clear this this is a QUEERS-only message board: 29th March 2003 - 01:43:19 AM 2152 : Kurt Steinberg SyKo (message 2249), get a life! Do you want to have sex with Dustin? If not, then get off this board! No heterosexuals are supposed to post here - this is a queers-only board!!! In this message, I made it clear that heterosexuals should not post here: 06th July 2003 - 01:44:50 AM 3124 : Kurt Steinberg Amanda, I agree with Steve Johnson. There are only two reasons why anyone whould post here: 1. To tell Diamond how much he sucks; or 2. To tell Diamond that he (i.e., the poster) wants to have gay sex with him. You seem to fit neither of these criteria, so you should probably stop posting here. You're the only person who posts here that doesn't want to have homosexual relations with Diamond. Diamond, please toss my salad!!!

07th November 2006 - 05:47:15 PM

78935 : Kurt Steinberg

Teresa, women are not supposed to post here. Please read the Terms of Service. The only chicks that should post here are chicks with dicks! If you post here again, the website admin will be forced to delete your message. This message board was set up as a service to gay fans of Dustin Diamond. Many homosexuals come here looking for hot spank material. When I'm smacking around my gind-dong, the last thing I want to read is an off-topic message about breaking into acting. Instead, I prefer to read queer fantasies about Mr. Belding manhandling Screech!

06th November 2006 - 09:18:58 AM

78914 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, I saw that our wikipedia entry includes a new picture of you: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dustin_Diamond Why were you staying with a "host family" in the midwest for 4 months during 2001? What is that all about?

03rd November 2006 - 12:31:33 AM

78870 : Kurt Steinberg

Dustin Diamond (78866) is an imposter! It's not the real Diamond - instead, it is PRINCESS PUESSIE! I didn't make the connection right away, but when I saw the use of the word "turds" I figured it out. Puessie was the only poster to use that term regularly. Get out of here Puessie. Nobody want you here, you cross-dressing faggot! Remember this "remember when" story about you? 16th May 2005 - 12:22:34 AM 13557 : Ox Screech, remember that episode where you were playing kickball during gym class at Bayside? Remember when Kelly was at the plate and she kicked the ball to you while you were playing shortstop? Remember when you fielded the ball and wildly threw it toward Zack, the first baseman? Remember when you were so uncoordinated that the ball slipped as you threw it and it hit the second baseman in the head? Remember when the second basement was a weirdo that liked to be called the "Prince"? Remember when everyone thought he was a complete faggot? Remember how he was the only kid in school that you could beat up, as he was even more scrawny than you? Remember when he got up after you hit hit with the kickball and came at you crying and screaming like the big pussy that he was? Remember when he swung at you with flailing arms? Remember when you kicked him in the nuts and he fell over? Remember when a crowd started forming around you two yelling "FIGHT!!! FIGHT!!! FIGHT!!!" as you squared off with the Prince? Remember when Mr. Belding ran out in the gym and said "hey, hey, hey, waht is going on here?" Remember when the Prince ran over to Belding and told him that you hit him with the kickball for no reason? Remember when Mr. Belding picked up the kickball and said "was it this kickball, you stupid FAGGOT?" as he whipped the ball at your face from a distance of a mere 10 feet away? Remember when the ball hit the Prince in his face, shattering his nose and spraying blood everywhere? Remember when the entire class started laughing and called the Prince a stupid piece of cocksucking shit? Remember when Slater said "whoa, that's a lot of blood" as Zack gave the Prince a legsweep, knocking him to the ground? Remember when Slater dropped trow and then dropped an HIV+ pile of shit on the Prince's bloody nose? Remember when the HIV from Slater's feces made its way into the Prince's bloodstream, giving the Prince HIV? Remember when Mr. Dewey, the science teacher, ran into the gym with a syringe and said "Prince, take this, it will make you better" as he injected the Prince? Remember when he finished the injection and then told everyone he had just injected the Prince with the Ebola virus? Remember when everyone started laughing? Remember how the Prince was a bloody, fecal-covered mess by this point? Remember when you said "alright, he's had enough... JUST KIDDING, WE'RE JUST GETTING WARMING UP!!!" as you kicking the Prince in the nuts and then yanked off his gym shorts? Remember when everyone laughed because the Prince was hung like a gnat? Remember when Slater, Zack, Mr. Belding, Maxwell Nerdstrom, and Mr. Dewey took turns stomping on the Prince's tiny hairless beanbag? Remember when I said "let me have a chance! I'm strong like an OX?" Remember when I stomped so hard on the Prince's nuts that his nutsack broke open and his tiny balls rolled out? Remember when Salter said "Prince, I think these belong to you" as he stuffed then down the Prince's throat? Remember when the Prince was in the hospital for months afterward and has been seeing a psychiatrist for years? Remember when you went to your 10-year Bayside high school reunion and discovered that the Prince had a sex change and now goes by the name "Princess Puessie"? Remember when Princess Peussie started posting retarded things in message board because he thinks they are funny, when in reality only a stupid fecal-munching pervert would find any of his postings funny? You and the Bayside gang sure screwed over the Prince in that episode!

03rd November 2006 - 12:25:42 AM

78869 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, thank you for setting up this glorious guestbook so that your gay fans will have one centralized location to post their gay fantasies!

01st November 2006 - 04:39:15 PM

78853 : Kurt Steinberg

Fellow queers, has anyone successuflly arranged gay sex with Diamond? I often ask him to pencil me in for rimming and teabagging sessions in gas station bathrooms, but when I show up he's never there! Has anyone else who posts here been fortunate enough to make a dump in Diamond's jew-fro or fire your seed down Diamond's throat? - Kurt Steinberg

01st November 2006 - 12:27:38 AM

78843 : Kurt Steinberg

Happy Halloween, what are you 15 years old? Based on the "quality" of writing on your post it is obvious that you are the immature one posting here. It's funny that you disparage the south and the midwest. But I'll bet you just love it in the northeast, don't you? There was a NJ queer who used to post on the Dustin Diamond Forum under the name Diamondish. Could that be you, faggot? For your insolance, I will be sure to drop a deuce in your mouth!

01st November 2006 - 12:19:12 AM

78841 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond is going to star in a shitty new movie entitled "HAMLET A.D.D.." http://www.free-press-release.com/news/200610/1161846566.html Fortress Productions Announces New Shakespeare Film Featuring Dustin Diamond Title: Fortress Productions Announces New Shakespeare Film Featuring Dustin Diamond Released by: Fortress Productions Release Date: 2006-10-26 02:09:26 For_Immediate_Release: PRESS RELEASE October 26, 2006 - Milwaukee, Wisconsin - FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE Fortress Productions is proud to announce the production of their feature film, Hamlet A.D.D., directed by Bobby Ciraldo and Andrew Swant. The film is a comic re-envisioning of the classic Shakespeare text which takes aim at making The Bard more captivating for modern audiences. The "A.D.D." in the title refers not only to a quirk of Hamlet's personality, but also to the fact that the play has been artfully condensed so as to appeal to audience members lacking in the focus department. Shot entirely in front of a 'green screen,' the film features live-action characters living in a playful cartoon world. Science-fiction elements are gradually woven into the story to re-invent the play for those already familiar Hamlet's narrative, and to keep newer audience members on their toes and at full attention. Ciraldo explains, "I play Hamlet, and Andrew plays Horatio. It's basically a buddy movie, except with a lot of weird words, murder, suicide, and some space travel." Says Swant, "We started working on the film in March of 2004 and hope to have it done in early 2007. Three years is a big chunk of your life, but it's been a really rewarding chunk." He adds, "We're extremely pleased with the way post-production is progressing and looking forward to audiences' reactions." Ciraldo adds, "We shot with Dustin Diamond about a year and a half ago. He was an absolute professional and a gifted actor." "Working with an icon like Dustin was a blast," says Swant, "T'was a mind altering experience." Other cast members include Robert Richard Jorge (American Movie, Coven) as King Claudius, Dustin Diamond (Saved By the Bell) as Bernardo, Mark Borchardt (American Movie, The One, David Letterman Correspondent) as the Gravedigger, Mike Schank (American Movie, Storytelling) as the Gravedigger's Friend, Xavier LePlae (The Foreigners, I'm Bobby) as Polonius, David Robbins (Lift, The Ice Cream Social) as the Norwegian Captain, Laura Klein (Helping Hand) as Queen Gertrude, Harmony Murphy (Big Girls Don't Cry They Get Even) as Ophelia, Paul Finger (singer of Wild Kingdom) and Matt Cook (The United States of Poetry) as Pirates, Steve Wetzel (Men's Hockey) as the Priest, Sarah Price (producer of American Movie) as the Judge, and Leslie Hall (of Leslie and the Lys) as herself. Fortress Productions, located in Milwaukee, is a full-service production facility providing creative services to business clients such as the Milwaukee Art Museum and The Sundance Channel, as well as individual artists such as Leslie Hall, Ray Chi, and David Robbins. For more information contact: Email: Info@FortressProductions.com Phone: 414-687-1474 Alt Phone: 414-429-3530 Web: www.FortressProductions.com/HamletADD Fortress Productions 1718 N 1st St. Suite 5N6 Milwaukee, WI 53212

31st October 2006 - 10:53:41 AM

78836 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, I agree with Borat in this youtube clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B6qD0nVqYMs We should throw you down a well!

31st October 2006 - 10:12:07 AM

78834 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond (message 78330), please write your gay messages in Standard English. When you use your queer little abbreviations, I get annoyed and don't know what the hell you are writing about. Let's hook up for unprotected buttsex!

31st October 2006 - 12:41:09 AM

78829 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, is it cool with you if I painfully burn off your nut-sac with a blowtorch? Please get back to me soon, buddy!

30th October 2006 - 11:26:21 PM

78828 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, thanks for posting, buddy! You're such an ass tease. When I arrived at home this evening I was disappointed that you were not here. :( Luckily, however, three queers were dasiy-chaining each other in the alley outside my building - I went down and took dumps on a couple of those HIV+ fruits! So everything turn out ok!

30th October 2006 - 01:55:46 PM

78826 : Kurt Steinberg

http://www.dontgivescreechadime.com/Welcome.html " Don�t Give Screech a Dime! Actor Dustin Diamond, known best for playing the character �Screech� on TVs �Saved by the Bell,� has been popping-up on various media lately hawking t-shirts and soliciting public support in a campaign to raise $250,000 to make the balloon payment due on his Wisconsin home. On his website GetDShirts.com and in interviews, Dustin suggests that there is a conspiracy to take his home from him. He makes it sound as if getting served with a notice of foreclosure after not making his house payment came as a shocking surprise. He uses words like �injustice� and spits venom at land-contract experts who weren�t able to bail his ass out. He talks about his �shitty credit� as if it were some kind of disease that was inflicted upon him, as opposed to the product of his own choices and behavior. While we here at DontGiveScreechADime.com have nothing against Dustin Diamond personally and are never happy to see anyone in an awkward situation, we believe strongly that the principles of accountability and responsibility apply to everyone, even former celebrities! Dustin Diamond is in his late 20s. He appears to be healthy and completely capable of contributing to society. He has had and continues to have opportunities that are not available to most. The general public should not be concerned if Dustin Diamond defaults on the loan for the house that he bought but obviously could not afford. He has no right to your sympathy or financial support. Plus, his public campaign is totally irritating and his shirts are uninspired and crappy-looking. Remember, if Dustin Diamond is successful with this campaign we have only ourselves to blame when he starts selling �HELP ME COVER MY ALIMONY PAYMENTS� and �HELP ME BUY A NEW LIVER� shirts. What can I do to really help Screech? �Again, don�t give him a dime. By giving him a dime, you become an �enabler� and only encourage his irresponsible behavior. �If you live in the Port Washington, Wisconsin area and have an extra room in your house, let Dustin Diamond know that he can �crash on your couch� for awhile when he gets evicted, but only if he gets his act together. � If you know of a job that you think Dustin Diamond would be qualified for, or if you run across something on the Milwaukee craigslist job-postings that you think he would be qualified for, let him know! �If you ever see someone sporting a �DShirt,� point, laugh, snicker and do whatever it takes to let them know that they are a chump. Now what do I do with that $15 burning a hole in my pocket? Well, anything else- give it to a real charity, take a loved one to lunch, apply it as extra principal toward your own house payment, buy some groceries or buy a Suicide Girl something from her Amazon wish list. If you feel so inclined to spend your dollars on celebrity charity schemes, spend it here. Thanks!"

30th October 2006 - 11:22:55 AM

78823 : Kurt Steinberg

Hungbob Spoogepants, Owen Wilson, Dner, and Paul Daanen, is it ok with you guys if I videotape your encounters? Diamond is destitute right now and could probably use some extra money from a second sex tape.

30th October 2006 - 01:39:01 AM

78816 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, do you remember when the Exxon Valdez tanker hit a reef in the waters off the coast of Alaska in 1989, spilling millions of gallons of oil into the Pacific Ocean? I think that you should have led the clean-up effort. Your jew-fro alone could have mopped up millions of gallons of oil. You should have teamed up with Chris Burke to form a celebrity clean-up crew. After you would have finished, Chris Burke would have lifted everyone's spirts by lighting your oil-soaked jewfrom on fire, burning your head to a crisp, much to the delight of all onlookers!

29th October 2006 - 05:29:46 PM

78813 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, reading the messages posted here must make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Dner and I want to do everything in our power to ensure that you remain well-fed with our feces! You must be licking your chops right now just thinking about these hearty meals!!!

29th October 2006 - 02:48:53 PM

78811 : Kurt Steinberg

Dustin, thanks for the praise! Is it cool with you if I insert a cupful of peanut M&Ms into my butthole and then fart them out into your mouth?

27th October 2006 - 02:34:15 PM

78794 : Kurt Steinberg

It took Zack's dad 35 minutes to upload the picture of Diamond that's on the main page of this website. Diamond, maybe if you Bill Gates or Larry Ellison take a dump in your mouth they'll help you improve this website!

27th October 2006 - 11:17:51 AM

78792 : Kurt Steinberg

Rocco, I think that Zack's dad did the best he could with his 1990 computers. Those computers actually used modems that tranmit at maximum speeds of only 4800 baud! Maybe Diamond should have sucked off someone who had better computer equipment.

27th October 2006 - 08:37:51 AM

78790 : Kurt Steinberg

Hey 78789, Diamond is a penniless nerd. He cannot afford to hire someone to update this website.

26th October 2006 - 11:18:35 AM

78785 : Kurt Steinberg

Diamond, I came across this article about you: "DIAMOND TO CASH IN ON SEX TAPE SCANDAL Former SAVED BY THE BELL star DUSTIN DIAMOND has stunned fans by choosing to take a cut of the profits from of his notorious sex tape instead of spending thousands of dollars trying to ban its release. Diamond, who played nerdy SCREECH on the 1990s high school series, claims he wasn't looking for a second career when he filmed himself having sex with two women four years ago. He tells American publication Us Weekly, "I'm not an adult actor. I did something stupid in private." Diamond, who is dating his manager, JENNIFER MISNER, claims he and some pals each made sex tapes as a joke. He says that someone leaked his tape, but insists he doesn't know who. Although he initially threatened to sue, the 29-year-old has now decided to make a profit on the 40-minute sex tape, tentatively titled SAVED BY THE SMELL, which will be released next month (NOV06). Diamond explains, "I thought, I can spend a fortune fighting this or I can try and make a fortune." He adds, "Let's just say, if I were a small man, it would be worse."" http://www.pr-inside.com/diamond-to-cash-in-on-sex-tape-scandal-r22746.htm Diamond, didn't you recently mention that some dude was your manager, but Jennifer was just your girlfriend? Now she's your manager again? Get your lies straight, fucko!

25th October 2006 - 03:54:36 PM

78774 : Kurt

Dner, great story. I like Belding's judicious use of his switchblade! I also think it is funny that everyone is always laughing at Screech while he's getting sodomized and beaten to a pulp. Screech is nothing more than a subhuman clown to all of the other Saved By The Bell characters.

25th October 2006 - 03:29:38 PM

78772 : Kurt Steinberg

I think it would be funny if someone sent a Dustin Diamond-related "postcard" to this website: http://postsecret.blogspot.com/