Friday, October 13, 2023

Video Clip of Corky Shooting a Gun

I discovered a short clip from an episode of Life Goes On entitled "Loaded Question."  This is the episode in which Corky's dad gave him a handgun to use to protect his house from robbers. 

A black guy who worked with Corky's hot older sister was snooping around the back of the house one night and Corky opened fire and tried to shoot him!  The black guy claimed that he was just trying to return some tools he had borrowed from Corky's sister.  However, it was very evident that the black guy was trying to find an unlocked door to Corky's house so that he could rob it!  The only thing that saved the black guy was Corky's complete lack of coordination.   

Another funny thing about this episode is the way in which Corky was carelessly waving that handgun around at 1:15 into this video clip while talking to his baby nephew.



98 comments:

Larry Dong said...

Corky was so entertaining. He knew that the script was lame and boring, so he livened things up by waving his gun around, nearly killing his nephew, the black guy snooping around, and even his dad! It would have been even funnier if he had left the gas stove top on high when he went outside and accidentally burned down his house.

Steve Bartman said...

I would love to fondle Corky’s dong. Maybe I could also put my lips on his butthole and give him a Rusty Trombone??? He’s a real stud! I hope Alex Rodriguez realizes how lucky he is to be dating Corky.

Crotch said...

Corky was right to be extremely suspicious of the black guy. In an earlier episode two hoodlums named Jamal and Jamuke had stolen his bike! I wish once Corky had that gun he pursued some vigilante justice like in the movie Death Wish. I always found it entertaining when Corky used his ‘tard card to get out of situations like firing off a gun, burning down his family restaurant, running various cars into dumpsters, and going dookie in the kitchen sink!

Smiddy said...

Look at how Corky bossed his dog around in the beginning of this clip. I bet that was what Screech used to experience when he was demoted to Corky’s unpaid assistant on “Saved By The Bell: The New Class.” Corky was nicer to his dog than he ever was to Screech, who typically ended up being slapped around and raped whenever Corky got irritated with something dumb Screech did!

Gary McAnus said...

Corky was watching an unusual episode of Seinfeld on Netflix last night in which Kramer was friends with a midget. Corky asked A-Rod why Kramer wasn’t friends with anyone with Down Syndrome and said that Down Syndrome people are more interesting than midgets. A-Rod replied that he heard that there was supposed to be an episode with a retarded character, but the actor who played him kept forgetting his lines and went dookie in the kitchen pantry five times in a row, so the episode was cancelled. A-Rod started laughing and said he was just kidding. Corky got mad and punched A-Rod in the balls and sat on his head and dropped ass! Corky then proceeded to rape A-Rod while Mr. Belding ate three tacos and then sprayed diarrhea into A-Rod’s pantry!

Crotch said...

Gary, you have to love how Mr. Belding had 3 delicious tacos sitting around and decided to take the time to gobble them up before spraying diarrhea in the pantry. A Rod was very rude to Corky and I’m glad Mr. Belding showed his support for Corky by shitting all over A Rod’s healthy food he keeps in the pantry.

Gary McAnus said...

Last night, Corky told A-Rod about an idea he had for a game show called “Who Dealt It?” Corky explained that 15 people would be in a crowded room and that someone would fart and everyone had to figure out who was the farter in order to win. Corky said that he and Mr. Belding would always be on the show as contestants. Mr. Belding said that he and Corky would be given an ample supply of tacos, pepperoni pizza, Doritos, and soda to consume before each taping. Corky also said that they would also be given big bags of M&Ms to eat. Corky also said that there would be one chair in the room and that A-Rod would be sitting on it while everyone else stood up. Mr. Belding said that the chair would be placed in a recessed portion of the floor which was at a lower level than the rest of the floor. A-Rod asked, “So my head is going to be at the level of everyone’s chest?” Corky replied, “No, you idiot! Everyone’s ass will be at the level of your head!” A-Rod asked why he had to sit with his head near everyone’s ass while everyone else got to sit. Corky responded that it was because A-Rod was the show’s host and that it was part of his job. A-Rod asked, “So people are going to be farting in my face??” And Corky replied that yes, they would be. A-Rod pointed out that the show was stupid because everyone would know if Mr. Belding or Corky farted because their farts are so insanely loud. Mr. Belding replied that each contest would be wearing a special kind of underwear which muffles the sound of farts. Mr. Belding also said that it was like a thong for men and that it keeps the wearer’s ass cheeks spread so that they can silently fart without making noise. A-Rod replied that wouldn’t that type of underwear raise the risk of a contestant accidentally shitting his pants? Mr. Belding said that they were addressing that by making each contestant wear dark black pants.. A-Rod also asked what the point of this game show was. Corky replied that whoever guesses the farter would receive thousands of dollars from A-Rod’s bank account. A-Rod relied that it was a terrible idea, one of Corky’s worst yet, and that the entire room would reek of the stench of anus. A-Rod then demanded that Corky pull out his dong so that A-Rod could fondle it since Corky had just wasted his time again. Corky was outraged that A-Rod dismissed his brilliant idea and ass-raped A-Rod while Mr. Belding ripped a 15-second fart!

Corky Fanatic said...

I believe that game show would be a smash hit. It doesn’t sound really thought out, but I can’t imagine anyone not wanting to watch a bunch of people in a room designed so they could rip ass in A Rod’s face. I’m sure Corky or Mr. Belding would be the culprits in every show, making guessing who farted pretty simple. But getting to watch A Rod crinkle his nose, and possibly puke, would be hysterical. A Rod would get so angry when people ripped ass in his face while the studio audience laughed. The best part is all the prize money would come from his bank account!

Tom Jizz said...

I just thought of a great variation on Corky’s game show. Perhaps A-Rod could be strapped down to an office chair capable of rotating completely around. Not only would his legs be strapped down to the seat, but his arms would also be strapped to the back so that he cannot move them. A motor could be attached to the base of the chair to continually roster the chair while contestants stand in a circle with their asses facing A-Rod as they chow down on greasy food such as tacos, pizza, and baked beans. The contestants will also be provided with bottles of cheap beer which doesn’t taste good when being drunk, but helps produces absolutely repugnant, eye-watering farts! A-Rod would have to guess which contestant produces the most nasty-smelling farts as his chair spins and the winner, of course, will be awarded with a cash prize from A-Rod’s personal savings account! I’m not sure exactly how the show’s producers will figure out who produces the nastiest farts, but I’m sure they’ll come up with something and millions of viewers will tune in to laugh at A-Rod’s facial expressions when the stench hits his nose. I’m sure we’ll see many nose crinkles and looks of disgust and queasiness on his face!!!

Gary McAnus said...

Last night Corky and Mr. Belding were stuffing their faces with pizza and candy while watching cartoons. The tv remote control was laying on a chair on the side of the room while the two best buddies gobbled down junk food and farted repeatedly. At one point, the cartoons ended and a Tony Robbins infomercial started playing. Mr. Belding and Corky were each too busy eating to walk over to the chair to grab the remote to change the channel. Corky enjoyed watching the infomercial and decided that he wanted to become a life coach and make millions of dollars. Corky ran to the den where A-Rod was watching the MLB playoffs and told A-Rod that he needed at least $1 million to film an infomercial and then air it on cable. Corky told A-Rod he was going to become a life coach and would make billions of dollars a year. A-Rod asked Corky what the hell he was talking about and questioned why normal people would pay thousands of dollars to a retard for life coaching. A-Rod also said that Corky would probably appear with Mr. Belding in the infomercial and they would stuff their faces with food and belch and fart throughout the infomercial. A-Rod questioned why anyone watching Corky belch, fart, and fill a diaper with dookie would contact Corky and want to pay thousands of dollars for life advice and life coaching from Corky. A-Rod told Corky that his Down Syndrome condition is getting worse and that Corky needed to pull down his pants so that he could get his rocks off fondling Corky’s dong. Corky got mad and punched A-Rod in the Adam’s Apple and then kicked A-Rod in the head. Corky then stomped on A-Rod’s back and pulled down A-Rod’s pants and viciously ass-raped him while Mr. Belding ate a large pie and belched loudly!

Bart said...

I would gladly pay just to watch the infomercial, let alone have personal access to the genius that is Corky! I can only imagine he had Mr. Belding teaching people so be as successful as they are. A Rod tends to forget Mr. Belding and Corky’s Hollywood success. He also forgets their amazing farting and belching prowess, along with their billion dollar ideas such as Corky brand diapers (and this years somewhat less successful Step by Step reboots, and Corky’s submarine tour above the titanic). What has A Rod done during this time? Played golf, co-hosted a few baseball games, and gotten beaten and raped by Corky regularly? I’m all for hearing from Corky on how I can be as successful as he is! A Rod should frankly sign up also!

Corky Fanatic said...

Today Corky and Mr. Belding were watching the Smurfs while eating 3 large pepperoni pizzas and some ice cream. Corky said that it would be funny if they did a reboot of the Smurfs where he, A Rod, Mr. Belding and Screech were characters. Mr. Belding belched his approval at this fine idea. Corky said that Screech and A Rod would both hav big Jew from and hook noses, and he and Mr. Belding would have to teach them lessons by buttslamming them all the time. He then yelled to A Rod to share his new idea. When A Rod appeared Corky said A Rod needed to get on the horn and get the rights to the Smurfs. He then explained his idea, specifically how A Rod would be a giant loser on the same level of Screech Smurf with a giant Jew fro and hook nose. He said he’d be living and dating Smurfette and Screech would live with Mr. Belding. He then said A Rod would live with Papa Smurf as he deranged lover, but that Corky would regularly come by and teach him lessons by ass raping him. In support Mr. Belding lifted his leg and ripped a 9 second wet fart. A Rod starred at them and said this was the dumbest idea over. He told the, the Smurfs was a kids show and they wouldn’t allow a ‘tard and his obese best friend to run around raping other Smurfs. He also said he didn’t want to be portrayed as a loser with a hook nose and Jew fro, and sure as hell didn’t want to live as Papa Smurfs lover. Corky tried to explain that it was just a funny cartoon and everyone would love it, but A Rod said he wasn’t helping. Corky then grew annoyed and clotheslined A Rod before ripping off his Texas Rangers uniform (A Rod seems to have jumped on the bandwagon since he once played there) and anally violating him. During this erotic attack Mr. Belding took a dump under a bathmat in a downstairs bathroom then covered it with the bathmat!

Larry Dong said...

Corky Fanatic, despite having Down Syndrome, Corky sure is creative! A-Rod needs to see the big picture as that cartoon would be a monster hit. Kids would watch it, but so would the gay community as well as Red Sox fans to laugh at the humiliation of A-Rod’s character. Mr. Belding Smurf would always be chowing down on food and could br used to make tons of money for the show through product placement. Imagine him drinking a 2-liter of Mountain Dew, stuffing his face with Cheetos, and then unleashing a 19-second belch in A-Rod Smurf’s face - the product sales for Mountain Dew and Cheetos would go through the roof. Also, a scene like that would quickly go viral as an Internet meme!

Corky Fanatic said...

I feel it’s a stupendous idea. It will bring back Screech as Screech Smurf, and Mr. Belding and he will live together. You just know there will be an enormous amount of “Zoinks, and ridiculously loud farts and belches. Corky Smurf is a surefire hit as he would be dating Smurfette, but would also teach A Rod Smurf tons of lessons by ass raping him. If they could get this going quickly I could see this years “must have” Christmas toy being Smurf action figures. A Rod would get so angry when his action figure sales were far behind those of Corky, Mr. Belding, and even Screech!

Corky Fanatic said...

Today Corky woke A Rod up by ripping a nasty fart in his face. He then told A Rod that he and Mr. Belding had examined A Rod’s claim that he was a great baseball player. He said they looked at the post season and found A Rod had a mediocre .259 batting average, compared to his amazing teammate Derek Jeter who had a .308 batting average. He said Derek Jeter also had more homers than A Rod. He said A Rod needed to stop talking about how great a player he was and that Mr. Belding was in the den taking down and throwing away all of A Rod’s dumb awards. He then said overnight he and Mr. Belding had drawn up some Smurf storyboards and showed him some drawings that had crude crayon sketches, but he could make out Corky with a massive dong holding hands with Smurfette. Then he noticed Mr. Belding also with a massive dong and a lot slimmer than reality. Behind Mr. Belding was Screech Smurf who had a massive Jew fro and had his enormous hook nose in Mr. Beldings ass. On the other side of every9ne was Papa Smurf who had no pants on and behind him was a creature with a large jewfro and massive hook nose that was also buried in Papa Smurf’s ass. A Rod said he assumed the person behind Papa Smurf was him and Corky said “yup”. Corky then told A Rod he and Mr. Belding had considered making A Rod the captain of the Smurfs softball league but after looking up his post season stats felt it more realistic that Corky Smurf play that roll. As A Rod began crying Corky ripped another fart in his face then went down to the kitchen to join his best buddy Mr. Belding in the kitchen for some pop tarts and fruity pebbles.

Smiddy said...

Corky Fanatic, will Gargamel be in Corky’s version of The Smurfs? Gargamel was as tall as a normal man, whereas the Smurfs were only a few inches tall, if I remember correctly. It would be funny if Gargamel had an itchy butthole and grabbed A-Rod Smurf and rubbed him up and down his sweaty ass crack while A-Rod Smurf gasped for fresh air and yelled, “Zoinks.” Gargamel would position A-Rod Smurf between his butt cheeks and then pull down his pants and rip a powerful wet fart, launching A-Rod Smurf 50 feet while Mr. Belding Smurf and Corky Smurf laugh hysterically. Corky Smurf would then strangle A-Rod Smurf with a Smurf diaper and ass-rape him!

Corky Fanatic said...

Smiddy, Gargamel will be involved. Corky has decided that Gargamel will have a Jew fro as he already has a large hook nose of sorts. Corky decided that Gargamel will be terrified of he and Mr. Belding and that they will call him “dick nose”, and will fart and belch on him. Every other Smurf will be scared of Gargamel, especially A Rod Smurf and Screech Smurf. Gargamel will do exactly as you said and run them on his butthole before ripping ass and launching them. Corky will of course accuse A Rod of cheating on him when Gargamel rubs A Rod Smurf on his butthole and will attack and rape him while Mr. Belding Smurf belches Dorito particles in A Rod Smurfs face, then rips nasty farts in his face. Screech Smurf will rarely be seen where he doesn’t have his hook nose buried in Mr. Belding Smurf’s butthole. I think this reboot is really progressing nicely.

Smiddy said...

Corky Fanatic, is there any truth to the rumors that Corky intends on adding new characters such as “Faggot Smurf,” “Ass Eater Smurf,” “Fart Sniffer Smurf,” and that all of them look like A-Rod and will wear Yankees pants? Each of them will prance around the Smurf village like total faggots. I also heard that there is going to be a “Steve Bartman Smurf” who wears huge 1980s style headphones and is always peering at other Smurfs going to the bathroom.

Corky Fanatic said...

Smiddy, it’s difficult to keep up with all the information coming out as Corky and Mr. Belding work fast and furious. I am hearing there will be guest spots for characters like Anthony Rizzo Smurf and Steve Bartman Smurf. Screech Smurf will be a permanent character and will have a job as an unpaid bathroom attendant in the local high school. Mr. Belding Smurf will be the high schools principal and Corky Smurf will be his assistant, who is also in charge of Screech Smurf. A Rod Smurf will be the schools janitor who Corky is also in charge of. He will constantly talk about how great a baseball player he was when he went to Smurf High, and all the students and Corky will laugh at him and call him a loser. A Rod Smurfs janitors pants will be Yankees Zubaz pants. Corky is changing things up and says A Rod Smurf won’t be Papa Smurfs lover, and instead A Rod Smurf will live in a janitors closet where Corky and Mr. Belding will trap him and fart and belch into it non stop. I can’t wait to see if this amazing idea gets a pilot episode! I’ve heard Mr. Belding called someone from NBC about this idea and ripped a mighty fart into the phone then hung up, causing Corky to laugh hysterically. I’m not sure of the person on the other end got the message about the new Smurf show, but I imagine they knew it was Mr. Belding.

Smiddy said...

Corky Fanatic, it is well-known that Corky’s favorite cartoon is He-Man from the early 1980s. I heard that Corky wants to include some He-Man characters in a special cross-over episode. Somehow Skeletor and He-Man are teleported to the Smurf Village and they are the same height as the Smurfs. He-Man is horny from the teleportation and seeing A-Rod Smurf slipping around the forest like a gigantic faggot. He slugs A-Rod Smurf in the gut and then pulls down his Yankees uniform pants and starts raping him! Skeletor, who apparently is also gay, emerges from behind a tree and joins in on the homosexual hijinks. He-Man and Skeletor start spit-roasting A-Rod Smurf while Corky Smurf laughs uncontrollably! He-Man and Skeletor give each other high-fives during this brutal attack before jizzing all over A-Rod Smurf. He-Man then gets on that tiger he rides around on and the tiger takes an enormous dump on A-Rod Smurf’s head! He-Man, Skeletor, and He-Man’s tiger are then teleported back to their own planet and then Mr. Belding Smurf emerges from a Taco Bell near the Smurf Village and unleashed a 12-second belch in A-Rod Smurf’s face while his mouth his stuffed with partially chewed Cinnamon Twists, coating A-Rod Smurf’s head with a layer of Cinnamon Twist film!

Larry Dong said...

I wonder whether Corky ever points out that Jason Heyward has just as many World Series championships as A-Rod. Corky could point out that despite a batting average of around .100 during the 2016 postseason, Heyward managed to single-handedly win the World Series for the Cubs by belching into his teammates’ assholes during the rain delay to motivate them to rally and win the game? Why didn’t A-Rod ever bench into the assholes of his Yankees teammates to motivate them to win additional World Series championships???

Corky Fanatic said...

Smiddy, Corky has had so many amazing ideas over the last few days. Just think how spitroasting A Rod will bring together mortal enemies He-Man and Skeletor! I have heard Corky used A Rod’s American Express card to hire a team of cartoonists to make this dream a reality. It sounds a bit spicy for a normal network in this day and age, but I’m sure the Cartoon Network or another channel that has late night programming will buy it. I would certainly tune in regularly if they did!

Corky Fanatic said...

Some exciting news. Corky has gotten his favorite athlete Hulk Hogan to participate and voice his character in the new Smurf reboot. The Hulkster will be portrayed from his glory days of the 1980’s and will make sure everyone is taking their vitamins and eating their vegetables. He will also visit his friends Mr. Belding Smurf and Corky Smurf each day to see if he needs to beat up or ass rape Screech Smurf or A Rod Smurf for doing a poor job, or annoying Corky.

Hal Herpes said...

Corky Fanatic, I work work a toy distributor. I heard that they are designing a new line of toys for Corky’s Smurfs reboot. There is going to be a Hulk Hogan toy which has removable pants. If you removed the pants, there is an indentation where his ass is located. There is also an A-Rod Smurf toy. Apparently the A-Rod Smurf and Hulk Hogan toys are designed to line up so A-Rod Smurf’s face fits into the indentation in the Hulk Hogan toy’s ass! It sounds like these toys will be real “stock stuffers” this year!

Corky Fanatic said...

Hal, thanks for that update! It’s amazing how quickly Corky moves. Within hours of Hulk Hogans involvement being announced a toy Hulkster with a perfect indent for A Rod Smurfs head is already in production! That will be the smash hit toy of the Christmas season! I have heard that the Mr. Belding Smurf toy has a small hole in the ass and comes with a small tube of brown goo. When fed into the mouth Mr. Belding Smurf can be squeezed in the stomach area, causing an enormous diarrhea spray! This is genius, as extra packages of “diarrhea” will sell separately. I’m told this was Corky’s idea and he and Mr. Belding are working furiously on this idea. Today A Rod, now sensing the financial potential tried to get Corky to give him a piece of the action, but Corky instead punched him in the adams apple and then ass raped him while Mr. Belding ate a dozen bratwurst’s with sauerkraut, then ripped noxious farts in A Rod’s face!

Hal Herpes said...

Corky Fanatic, there is also going to be a Taco Bell play set for the Smurfs reboot. There is a counter with a big board menu, a seating area, a kitchen area, and even a men’s room. The strange thing is that the men’s room takes up about 70% of the area of the play set. There are a couple stalls and a urinal in that men’s room portion. Several of the Smurfs action figures can fit in a stall at a time. I’m sure that people with play with these play sets and have several action figures violate the A-Rod Smurf character! That new diarrhea feature for Mr. Belding Smurf will undoubtedly be used in this men’s room to portray A-Rod Smurf being on the receiving end of a thick diarrhea spray! There is reportedly also going to be a Screech Smurf action figure which has a poofy Jew-fro and enormous hook nose. The Screech Smurf action figure will also have a little foldable bag in which tiny breath mints, cheap cologne bottles, and paper towels will be located. I’m sure that these will be selling like hot cakes this Christmas season!!

Store Owner said...

Hal, is it true there is also a 'trucker set' in production and that it will be a peterbilt big rig, with an obese older dude figurine?

I also heard, but this was a rumour going round on online newsboards, but there will be a commemorative bandstand playset to celebrate the 2019 queercore festival with salty the pocket knife and the demasi twins! It even has leapfrogging action figures.

I think this is an important way to celebrate the iconic festival AND the trucking scene.

Hal Herpes said...

Store Owner, I have heard about a big rig truck toy set which comes with an obese trucker wearing jeans low enough so that the trucker’s ass crack is showing. However, I have not heard anything about the DeMasi twins having a toy set. Corky had some type of falling out with them, so I wouldn’t expect to see them appear on Corky’s Smurfs reboot and doubt that they will ever get mass-produced toys. There is a rumor that they stole Corky’s porn collection or drugs, or something like that and Corky is still upset about it. It is possible, however, that there could be a special mail-order toy set for those two weirdos, but I wouldn’t bet money on this happening anytime soon.

Store Owner said...

The thing is Hal, i've seen the prototype of the Demasi set. its set on a stage, that looks exactly like the buddy walk 2013 show they did.

Juicily, there is also a cage, a tin of hotdogs and both a baseball jacket AND a leather jacket that didn't seem to fit on the twins when i tried them on...I wonder if there is going to be another limited run action figure?!

Its a shame they fell out because they released some banging albums in the mid noughties. Do you have a favourite track of theirs you like to grind to?

Hal Herpes said...

Store Owner, I’m not really into the gay ‘tard scene, although I do make a living selling toys to that market segment. But I have been familiar with Corky, given his A-list superstar status, and I had heard of the DeMasi twins. I don’t know whether it is true, but I heard rumors that the DeMasi’s were trying to take advantage of Corky for his money and to get a piece of his Adonis-like body. The story goes that the DeMasi twins tried to trick Corky into servicing their homosexual needs, or something like that, but Corky turned the tables on them and used his ‘tard strength to make them service his own sexual needs!

Concerned Citizen said...

A simple search for “Joe DeMasi” reveals that someone with that name was arrested in Vietnam and pled guilty to molesting little boys in Vietnam. He is currently serving a 108-month sentence. Is this one of the DeMasi twins from Corky’s band???

https://www.justice.gov/opa/pr/repeat-child-sex-offender-sentenced-108-months-prison-attempted-sex-abuse-vietnam

SBF Fanatic said...

Speaking of criminals I am a huge fan of SBF and feel it’s mean to prosecute him for stealing a little crypto from people as it’s kinda made up and isn’t even real cash. As far as I’m concerned those people were asking for it and SBF taught them a lesson they should be thanking him for! I am far more interested in him being free and manning bathrooms as a bathroom attendant. I am intrigued about his potential to join this new Smurf venture. SBF Smurf could be a protege of Screech Smurf and the two of them could occasionally man a truck stop bathroom together where Smurf truckers would fart in their faces and piss in their Jew fros. I’m hoping SBF is found not guilty in time for the holiday season. I’m sure he wants to be out manning the truck stops during that time of giving. Everyone knows truckers are most generous during December and step up from nickels to dime tips!

Ass Breath said...

Is there any truth to the rumors about all of the Smurfs in the reboot cartoon wearing skin-tight pants which reveal the outlines of their dongs? I read that Corky Smurf and Mr. Belding Smurf will be drawn with enormous bulges in their crotches. There is supposedly a highway rest stop near the Smurf Village for some reason there is also a scene where Corky Smurf and Mr. Belding Smurf pull down their pants and it is revealed that their cocks hang down to their knees! A-Rod Smurf and Screech Smurf, on the other hand, are drawn with little tiny knubs which are their baby cocks! There are also supposed to be scenes in which A-Rod Smurf walks into Papa Smurf’s house and then the conspicuous sound of loud butt-slamming emanates form inside, although nothing explicit is actually shown other than the noises.

Stroe Ownerg said...

Hal i don't think that is exactly Canon.

They had a really raunchy stage act lasting until well into the mid 2010s and theres lots of x rated videos of Corky grinding his bubble butt on buff jocks whilst the twins are jamming away on their acoustic guitars.

What is true however is that they are no longer part of Cork's inner circle. I wonder if they are scared of A Rod?

One other juicy tidbit is that I was looking through the documentation for the 1994 world farting competition and saw that a 'Mr. Belding' entered and got to the quarter finals where his caddy was a Mr 'DeMasi'. Do you think its the same person? Hal you really need to answer this really important question as soon as you can.

Lastly, i wonder what a caddy does at the world farting competition. I heard that they do important things like inspect the pizzas and mountain dews cups before the competitor demolishes them and also advises on farting strategies depending on the room and the chair involved.

Mitch said...

I am the assistant manager at a Motel 6 located in Livestock, NV, just outside of Reno. Corky stayed at the hotel last week with Mr. Belding and A-Rod. The weird thing is that A-Rod was wearing a huge Jew-fro wig and rainbow colored pants which resembled Zubaz pants from the early 1990s. Corky kept referring to A-Rod as “Screech” and said something about deporting him to Mexico if he made Corky mad. They were awful guests and we received numerous complaints about loud butt-slamming coming from their room as well as the constant sounds of wall-shaking farts. The stench was unbearable to our maids who refused to clean their room for a few days until it had aired out somewhat with the windows open. I saw A-Rod when he checked out of the room after a couple days and he coated in feces and there appeared to be an ass-print on his face! A-Rod was also limping in noticeable pain when they checked out. It was pretty obvious that Corky had really gone to town on A-Rod’s butthole!

Gary McAnus said...

Earlier tonight, Corky wore clown makeup and then walked up to A-Rod and belched right in his face while A-Rod was sitting on his couch watching the ball game. A-Rod yelped, “Zoinks!” and then told Corky that was disgusting and asked Corky to leave him alone. Corky was outraged because it is Halloween and Corky expected A-Rod to give him a bunch of candy after that belch. A-Rod, however, was not aware that within the ‘tard community belching in someone’s face is equivalent to saying “Trick or Treat.” Corky was mad at A-Rod for being so rude and punched A-Rod in the balls and then kicked him up the ass! Corky then put A-Rod in a headlock and pressed his face up against Mr. Belding’s ass as Mr. Belding began ripping a 15-second nasty fart! Corky proceeded to ass-rape A-Rod while Mr. Belding belched to encourage him!!

Ass Scratcher said...

Mitch, that is one hot and erotic story! I can’t believe your guests weren’t overwhelmed by the celebrity duo of Mr. Belding and Corky! It’s shocking people would complain about hearing powerful buttslammmg and getting to breathe in the noxious ass gas of Mr. Belding. If you tip me off if they come back to your hotel I’ll immediately travel there and tip you a C note. If you get me a room next to theirs it will be another C note. I’d also like to come to an arrangement where I could drill a few small holes in the wall between mine and theirs. This way I could leer at Corky ass slamming and beating up A Rod/Screech while rubbing my dong! The holes would also allow the heinous stench of Mr. Beldings farts allowing me to lay on my bed and pretend the Big Bopper was in my room ripping farts right in my face! Mitch I’m counting on you buddy. Help me make this dream happen and I’ll make sure you get a massive tip!

Mitch said...

Ass Scratcher, there is little doubt that most of the gay community enjoys hearing loud butt-slamming, loud farts, as well as the sound of semen flying across a room and smacking against the walls emanating from the room next door to them in a hotel. They also enjoy the rancid stench of balls and ass wafting under their doors and through the vents. However, heteros are not into this type of stuff at all! We got a lot of complaints from families and business people who stayed at our hotel when A-Rod, Corky, and Mr. Belding were our recent guests.

Reatardid Faggit said...

Duskin Dimaond & Corkee Thakker are seekrit luvers and thay like to fukk eech othur in tha anus-hoal and sukk eech othurs seeman.

SBF Fanatic said...

Gentlemen and fellow deranged queers. I am distraught! The government railroaded our newest queer icon and he now faces an extremely long prison sentence. The idea of his massive Jew fro and pasty ass cheeks being hidden from the public has me distraught. My only hope is the judge will take into consideration his training and importance to the LGBTQ community and will set him free, or just sentence him to serve his sentence in a truck stop bathroom! If we lose SBF to prison I wonder if his Dad, Mr. SBF, could wear a Jew fro and take over his sons role? I for one would totally back my ass up to his face and rip a few blasts.

Anus Goblin said...

SBF Fanatic, I heard about the guilt verdict. When you are sentenced to prison, I hope you are allowed to have conjugal visits! I would pay to watch Corky slap you around and go to town on your butthole and jizz all over your Jew-fro.

When you are in prison, do you think you’ll use your newly learned skills as an unpaid bathroom attendant to avoid be sexually violated by the horny gay men in prison with you??

SBF Fanatic said...

Anus Goblin, I am not SBf, just his biggest fan. I am saddened that he is in prison and we won’t even know his sentence until March of next year. He was on his way to be a queer icon and I had planned on following him from truck stop to rest stop this holiday season. I was lucky enough to run into him during his training in the Bahamas, as well as a massive truck stop bathroom outside Seattle. Both times he serviced my P and A needs perfectly and accepted my farts as tips. I’m certain he will put these skills to use in whatever prison he is sent to. Unfortunately there are no conjugal visits in the federal prison system which is total bullshit. I will be so jealous of the inmates of whatever prison he is sent to. I’m sure it will be a low security prison like Bernie Maddoff was sent to. Too bad Bernie died as I could see SBF being his prison bitch!

Anus Goblin said...

SBF Fanatic, I stand corrected. That’s awful that conjugal visits are not allowed in federal prisons! SBF have a legion of gay fans who would love to feel his tongue on their stinky buttholes while he gives them reach-arounds.

I, for one, hope that SBF finds a kind older prisoner to take him under his wing and guide him. It would be great if his prison mentor were obese and balding. He could be SBF's “Mr. Belding.” SBF would learn to love licking his mentor's sweaty taint while the mentor rips ass in SBF's face!

Angry Dad said...

Mitch, my family stayed at your Motel 6 while A Rod, Corky, and Mr. Belding were there. I have no idea why someone worth hundreds of millions of dollars would stay at a budget motel. My family is poor and we were there on a family vacation. We spent most of our time at casino buffets in Reno. After one buffet my son Timmy who is 10 announced he to go “spray diarrhea”. He then belched in my wife’s face and told her to “keep the change”. Before I could yell at him he had waddled off to the bathroom. I followed him and when I got into the bathroom I found him spraying diarrhea in a urinal like some kind of animal! When I asked where he’d learned that behavior he said Mr. Belding had been hanging out with him while Corky “buttslammed” A Rod! I told him members of our family didn’t shit in urinals like cavemen and he was no longer allowed to hang out with Mr. Belding. He began crying as we walked back to our table and said Mr. Belding was a better Dad then I was. That night we just stayed in our room, which was two doors down from Corky, Mr. Belding, and A Rod. I also didn’t understand why they didn’t have at least two rooms? We could hear insanely loud farts and my son sat right by the door so he could enjoy the sounds and shakes. I tired to get him to watch TV with me and eat some snacks we’d gotten at WalMart but he just lifted his leg and passed gas! That continued on for the rest of our trip. Now that we are back home he’s been telling my wife he wants to drop out of school and take a class to be a bathroom attendant! My wife is distraught and blames me for being so cheap and staying at that Motel 6. Someone help me!!

Mitch said...

Angry Dad, I am sorry that your son is acting up, but Motel 66 is not responsible for his actions. When I was a kid, my dad would have kicked my ass for acting out like your son did. Perhaps that is exactly what your son needs from you. You have to realize that the population of degenerate queers has exploded over the last decade, so you should expect for your son to encounter deviants like A-Rod, Corky, and Mr. Belding again. You may find this hard to believe, but my boss has invited Corky, A-Rod, and Mr. Belding back to stay at our fine budget hotel for a half-price room. There was so much buzz about their stay at local gay bars that our lobby phone has been ringing off the hook with people interested in rooming next to them so that they can listen in on the loud butt-slamming and wall-shaking farts! We also intend to set up a web cam outside of their room which has a sensitive microphone to broadcast the noises through the internet so that fans can listen in on the fun!

Angry Dad said...

Mitch, it sounds insane that you would invite those deviants back to your hotel. Also, A Rod is worth hundreds of millions many on earth would he care about a “half priced room”. We paid $69 per night. A Rod cares that much about $35 he would allow you to create some twisted event around him staying there? One where him being buttslammed and farted on is broadcast to the world? Earlier tonight I had to take a shit. When I went in my bathroom I found my son in there in a little outfit he’d made up. He had a little tray of breath mints, colognes, and a thing of binaca. He bowed when I came in and watched as I sat down and took a dump. He told me I was taking a masterful shit and refused to leave when I told him to get out. When I was done he offered to wipe my ass, and asked if I needed anything from his stupid tray. When I said I didn’t and he should leave he held out a little tip hat. I begrudgingly put a dollar in it and he seemed really happy and spritzed me with some awful smelling cologne on my way out. Motel 6 has ruined my son’s life!

Mitch said...

Angry Dad, A-Rod reportedly has hundreds of millions in net worth, but I can tell you that he is really cheap. I think that Corky and Mr. Belding are spending a significant amount of his money, either directly or indirectly (e.g., by forcing him to spend money to repair the damage they do to his property). He actually went to our front desk and asked for directions to the nearest DollarTree! He also asked where the closest Burger King was and said something about wanting to take advantage of a “BOGO Whopper” deal there. The crazy thing is that he still drives a Bentley! His 2020 Bentley was parked next to a rusty 1978 Ford Pinto in our parking lot! There was also a rusty 1973 Gremlin parked further down in our lot.

In any event, we reached out to him and he is interested in taking advantage of our 50% off deal. Apparently he had a great time being butt-slammed and is a bit of a voyeur who doesn’t mind of random stranger can hear him yelp in pain as Corky goes to town on his butthole and rips nasty 15-second wet farts in his face!

Gary McAnus said...

Last night, Corky ran to the den to tell A-Rod that he needed $1 million to open an art studio to sell the art work of his best buddy, Mr. Belding. A-Rod asked what he was talking about and said that he found it hard to believe that Mr. Belding had time to create any art, seeing as how he spends most of his day eating, farting, and going diarrhea. Corky was about to smack A-Rod in the head for his rude behavior until Mr. Belding belched loudly and Corky started laughing hysterically. Mr. Belding said that tie-dye shirts were big in the 1960s and made somewhat of a resurgence in the late 1980s. Corky then chimes in to say that Mr. Belding had an improvement over tie-dye shirts. Corky then pulled out a pair of Mr. Belding’s underwear and pointed out the artistic yellow stain in the front as well as the clever brown stain in the back. Corky then handed A-Rod the underwear. A-Rod asked why he thought that this underwear was artistic and pointed out that the yellow stain in the front was a pee-stain and the brown stain in the back was a dookie stain. A-Rod asked why anyone in their right mind would consider this art or would want to display it in their house. A-Rod then pointed out that the underwear had nasty stench and then asked whether Mr. Belding had washed it. Corky replied that obviously it hadn’t been washed because Mr. Belding didn’t want to ruin the art! A-Rod then said “Eww!” and threw the underwear in the trash can and said he needed to go wash his hands. Corky was outraged at A-Rod’s rude behavior and punched him in the taint and kicked him up the ass! Corky then proceeded to yank down A-Rod’s Yankees uniform pants and ass-raped him to teach him a lesson about appreciating art!!

Screech Fanatic said...

Mitch, did Screech happen to frequent your fine establishment? He was known to drive a Gremlin, and I’ve seen stories where he also had a Pinto?! I’ve been waiting for Barrett Jackson or some other high end vehicle auction house to sell off Screech’s fine Gremlin, but have yet to see it happen. I’m now wondering if you have a goldmine sitting in your parking lot? Could you check to see if the vehicles have signs of Screech? Like piles of gay porn, seats coated in diarrhea and jizz, chunks of Jew fro strewn about, soiled Zubaz pants? When Screech passed he didn’t own much, but he did have at least one Gremlin that hasn’t yet appeared.

Mitch said...

Screech Fanatic, I don’t think that either of the cars recently in our parking lot ever belonged to Screech. I do remember Screech staying here maybe 10 years ago - he drove a rusty purple late 70s Ford Pinto at the time. The passenger side rear seat window was missing and he had a black plastic bag taped up in its place! I also remember that there was pubic hair all over the upholstery, although I suppose it could have been chunks of Jew-fro. Whatever it was, it was pretty nasty. I remember one other thing - there were Arby’s wrappers all over the floor - he must have eaten there regularly.

Screech Fanatic said...

Mitch, thanks for the clarification. I initially believed you were saying the cars were abandoned in your parking lot. I hoped Screech had potentially abandoned them there, much like he abandoned his house. I assume Screech stayed there while in Reno to do his “act” at a local truck stop. I was one of his biggest fans and would love to own the gremlin he drove for many years while on SBTB and then for at least 5 years after the show finished. Hopefully it wasn’t crushed for scrap metal. I could see Screech doing that to get $5 back when Arby’s regularly had the 5 regular roast beef sandwiches for $5! It was amazing what he’d do for $5 when that deal was going on.

Ass Scratcher said...

A Rod sure is a deviant weirdo. Just imagine having hundreds of millions of dollars and staying at a motel 6. As if that weren’t bad enough you get only one room with two crappy double beds so your ‘tard lovers obese best friend can be two feet away while he stuffs his face and watches cartoons as you get buttslammed. I’d also like to know why the hell they drove from Florida to Nevada? That’s one hell of a drive. I’m sure Corky and Mr. Belding needed pit stops every 30 minutes to get snacks and drinks. Also, that car must have stank like shit by the time they got to Reno. Why wouldn’t A Rod have just chartered a jet and gotten them there quickly and comfortably? I can’t see Mr. Belding being comfortable on a days long car trip, even in a Bentley. A quick search shows the trip is 43 hours and nearly 3,000 miles long!? I have a buddy in Arizona who told me a few weeks back he saw a white Bentley being driven by a guy with a massive Jew fro and both the front passenger and back seat passenger had their asses pressed to his head. He said even amidst the traffic noise he could hear some ridiculously loud farts, then the car swerved dangerously. He said he got out of there fearing an accident. I now wonder if that was A Rod, Corky, and Mr. Belding?

Pee Stain said...

Hey everybody, I’m pretty sure that A-Rod has a condo or possibly a house in Las Vegas. He probably drove from there to Reno to partake in its legendary truck stop dumpster/men’s room scene. I agree that it would be nuts for A-Rod to drive his Bentley 3000 miles just to save $29/night on a crappy hotel room at Motel 6! That is crazy that Corky is busy butt-slamming A-Rod while Mr. Belding stuffs his face with Doritos and cake while watching cartoons and movies in the bed just a few feet away.

I have heard that back when Mr. Belding was dating Screech during the mid-90s, they would eat dinner at a Pizza Hut in downtown Reno and then Mr. Belding would butt-slam Screech so loudly that everyone in the restaurant could hear them!

Artic Char said...

I have to say I love when the boys stay at a place like Motel 6. I was at a gay bar called “Satans Taint” when the guys rolled into town and we were the first call the front desk clerk made after they checked in. I cruised right on over and hung out outside there room. Since all the rooms exit to the parking lot you don’t have be bothered by rooms on the other side of a hall, or nosy management asking what the hell you are doing. Thankfully they were on the first level and we didn’t even have to walk up stairs (I’m sure this was requested for the sake of Mr. Belding). I could hear loud farts as I got close to the room and then the sound of someone being smacked around, then buttslammed. The stench of ass permeated from the vent for the AC/Heating unit and 5 or 6 of us stood there huffing it and jerking off wildly. We could hear some kind of cartoons blaring as well as someone munching on chips and belching. After jizzing on the wall my buddies and I went to the Denny’s next door. Soon after A Rod, Corky, and Mr. Belding came in. Corky and Mr. Belding ordered and impressive amount of food, and A Rod just had some water. At one point Corky said he had to go to the bathroom, then stood up and ripped a loud fart in A Rod’s face before high fiving Mr. Belding. We then watched Mr. Belding wolf down about 20 pancakes along with bacon and sausage. He constantly ripped ass and had the restaurant stinking of a filthy anus. It was all incredibly hot. By their second day there word had gotten out and the queer Reno community was clamoring to get rooms next to them, or pay $20 for a ticket that got you into a roped off area outside of there room! I felt Motel 6 took advantage of us by doing that and refused to pay. But I’ll always have my memories. I hope they return soon. Corky and Mr. Belding are class acts.

Dong Fondler said...

Artic Char, that was a hot story! I can only image how homoerotic that must have been to camp outside A-Rod’s hotel room at the Motel 6 so that you could hear him being loudly butt-slammed by Corky while Mr. Belding chowed down on chips while watching cartoons. The memory must have made it into your own personal “spank bank” for you to think about the next time you rub one out. That stench of anus and semen must have been super intense as it wafted through the vent around the AC unit in the room. It is a shame that greedy hotel management started selling tickets to prime seating outside of the room for $20. Was it at least a comfortable chair, kind of like what you would see at an expensive movie theater? Or were they crappy plastic folding chairs like the ones sold at Wal-Mart for around $10? I bet that the sound of 30 dudes jerking off drowned out much of thr sound of butt-slamming and loud farts coming from A-Rod’s room, which is unfortunate. ☹️

Arctic Char said...

Dong Fondler, it was extremity erotic and the deranged queer crowd really showed up. The first night was the best as it was only a few of us and we were really able to hear the sounds and smell the stink coming from their room. Hearing buttslamming with “Zoinks” being yelled while cartoons blared was so hot I lost a number of loads in just a half an hour! Then the management of the motel 6 ruined it by charging to be in the good spot right by the AC/Heating unit. They charged $20 for a crappy chair. It wasn’t even foldable. It was one of those stackable plastic chairs that are really uncomfortable. You think they would have provided a Capri Sun or some kind of drink but they didn’t. They steered everyone to the vending machines which they had marked up just for that occasion. I’m hoping they return soon. It’s gotten pretty chilly as we settle in for winter and I’d love to set up a barrel outside their room and have a roaring fire to keep us warm as we jerk off. It would be amazing if Mr. Belding came out and ripped a few massive farts to generate some fireballs! Mr. Belding did come out the second night from what I was told and did his trademark “hey hey hey what’s going on here” which made a few guys instantly ejaculate. It seems Mr. B was on his way to the vending machines and was furious when he saw the prices. He just shook the machine and put his massive girth to it causing numerous items to fall. He then took this smorgasbord of snacks back to his room.

Gary McAnus said...

Yesterday afternoon, Corky ate lunch at Taco Bell with his best buddy, Mr. Belding. He scarfed down 10 of them and then came back to A-Rod’s mansion. As his body digested the greasy meal, Corky began ripping some nasty wet farts and filled up his diaper with doodie while he sat on the couch watching cartoons. Corky then yelled for A-Rod - when A-Rod walked into the room, Corky said he was horny and that A-Rod should put on his Jew-fro Screech wig so that he and A-Rod could make out. Corky then stood up and told A-Rod to grab his booty. A-Rod replied that it smelled like anus in the den and said that it looked like Corky had filled up his diaper. A-Rod said that he should change Corky’s diaper before making out. Corky got mad and said he was horny right now and that he wanted to feel A-Rod’s hands on his booty. A-Rod replied that if he touched Corky’s bare ass, he would get Corky’s doodie all over this hands and that it would be gross and make a mess. Corky got really mad and said that A-Rod was being a selfish jerk! Corky then kicked A-Rod in the taint and punched his anus! Corky then removed his overflowing diaper and used it to strangle A-Rod while raping him! Mr. Belding laughed during his encounter and then opened the lid on A-Rod’s fish tank and sprayed diarrhea into the fish tank, killing A-Rod’s exotic fish!!

Luke O’Brien said...

I am a reporter for the Huffington Post. I have been following Corky’s exploits for years and am interested in setting up an interview. I would like to interview Corky as well as his best friend, Mr. Belding, and lover, Alex Rodriguez. I want an in-depth interview, so to get in the right frame of mind, I will need to have sex with Corky myself. I would love for Corky to treat me like I’m A-Rod and slap me around before giving me rough anal. I am so gay for Corky right now!

Mitch said...

Corky, A-Rod, and Mr. Belding spent another night at my Motel 6 last night. Things are getting out of hand as local gay bars have been announcing where they are staying, so the line of people outside their motel room is now quite large. My boss started renting out swivel office chairs for patrons who want to loiter outside of Corky’s motel room to listen in on the action. Unfortunately, however, there are so many demented Corky fans outside that it is hard to hear what is going on in their motel room. I know that Corky has been loudly butt-slamming A-Rod like usual, but there are so many dudes jerking off outside the room that all I could hear was the sounds of those dudes masturbating and couldn’t hear the butt-slamming from Corky’s room! Also, the smell of anus emanating through the AC vent of Corky’s room has been overtaken by the stench of anus coming from all of the swivel chairs which have had filthy dudes sitting on them bare-assed for days now! I think that the note management should really consider videotaping the outside of their room and broadcasting it on a pay-per-view channel so that everyone can hear the hot sounds from Corky’s room while the patrons are sitting naked at home rubbing one out. Obviously they would not be able to smell the stench from Corky’s room, but at least they’d be able to hear the anal sex, loud farts, and diarrhea sprays!

Arctic Char said...

Mitch, we understand they are staying the weekend and the queers of Reno are very excited. During his short trip to the vending machines many noticed Mr. Beldings massive dong. Everyone understands Mr. B lost the love, but word has that many of Teno’s most deranged queers are prepared to “shoot their shot” to try and seduce the Big Bopper! I have a friend who sells wigs and he told me he has sold over 25 “‘fro wigs”! There has been a massive run at various thrift shops of dudes looking for Zubaz pants as well. I was glad to see that the hard plastic chairs were upgraded swivel chairs, but agree with Mitch that the scene has made it so it’s hard to really enjoy the sounds and stenches coming from the room. Mitch, do you think it would be possible to at least get a microphone in the room, and a portable Bluetooth speaker outside the room to amplify the buttslamming, farts, and belches? I plan on being there Friday and Saturday, and have coughed up for a swivel seat. If Mr. Belding leaves the room I will be excited to see how he reacts to all the dudes trying to get a piece of his rhinoceros penis!

Mitch said...

Hey gang, I have great news! I was just informed that Mr. Horton is going to be staying in a room a couple doors down from Corky and A-Rod. Mr. Horton is 91 years old, but he’s still going strong. He’s with his lover, Dudley - they said that they are celebrating their 45th year of dating/marriage as well as Dudley’s 52nd birthday! Mr. Horton said he’s going to play a loud round of “Neptune: King of the Sea” which will involve eating handfuls of pills, drinking red wine, and engaging in some butt-slamming…

Arctic Char said...

This weekend has been wonderful. I believe seeing that the world is watching on this fine board the motel 6 went all out and provided the swivel chair patrons some mini candy bars and juice boxes! I really enjoyed snacking while enjoying the non stop farts, belches, and buttslamming that came from Mr. Belding, Corky, and A Rod’s room. It was so hot. Motel 6 staff also set up an area for unpaid degenerates that was well back from the prime seating area which really limited the noise of dudes jerking off. What was nice was our area encompassed Mr. Horton and Dudley’s room. Mr. Horton seemed excited to have a fan base and kindly left the door open while he and Dudley played “Neptune, King of the Sea”! Mr. Horton even came out to offer a few of us wine and pills! One guy popped a few of the pills, along with some wine, then fell of his chair. A nude Dudley ran out and drug the unconscious guy into their room while we cheered and continued jerking off! What an amazing weekend.

Mitch said...

My Motel 6 recorded record revenues over the past couple weeks! Corky’s room with A-Rod and Mr. Belding has obviously been the main attraction, but Mr. Horton’s and Dudley’s room is quite popular in its own right. Leaving his door open to play “Neptune: King of the Sea” was a genius marketing move by Mr. Horton! We’ve added yet another attraction starting on Tuesday night - Anthony Rizzo and Steve Bartman are staying for a few days! Jason Heyward is going to make a guest appearance to belch into Anthony Rizzo’s anus to start things off before handing off the baton to Steve Bartman, who will go ahead and service Anthony’s penis and ass needs. Expect to hear insanely loud pepperoni farts from their room as Anthony rips his trademark 15-second wet farts in Bartman’s face! Anthony will follow this up by loudly butt-slamming Bartman for your enjoyment! We will have ten swivel chairs available for rent set up outside their motel room so that fans can listen in on the fun while pleasuring themselves!

Former Chicago Sun-Times Reporter said...

I was a journalist for the Chicago Sun-Times newspaper between 2001 and 2006. At that time, I covered sports topics of interest. Back in 2003 I was tasked with investigating the incident in which Steve Bartman went to catch a foul ball which would have been caught by Cubs outfielder Moises Alou if he hadn’t reached out his hand (along with several other fans). As you may remember, Mr. Bartman was wearing huge 1980s-style headphones during that incident. I did some sleuthing at the time and discovered that Mr. Bartman used those headphones to listen to an illicit audio recording of Mr. Belding ripping nasty loud farts in Screech’s face and also spraying diarrhea on Screech and butt-slamming him! I wrote about this in a draft article, but my editor thought that these details were far too salacious and changed my story to indicate that Mr. Bartman was listening to a live radio broadcast of the game. I was looking for some hot spank material and came across this fine website and thought that you should all know about this!

Ass Scratcher said...

Damn this is some spicy info! We now have a Motel 6 in Reno that is hosting extremely high end homosexual talent! Mitch, I hope you continue hosting these amazing gatherings. As you’ve noticed the queer community will support anything deranged. I’m sure the European jet set queers will fly in all winter if you continue hosting deviants like Steve Bartman and Anthony Rizzo you will see an influx of queers speaking numerous languages. I’m hoping the accommodations can be spruced up a bit from swivel chairs to some nice recliners, as well as a giant screen with massive speakers to really give a high end experience. I would love to sit in a recliner and watch Anthony Rizzo rip giant pepperoni farts in Steve Bartman’s face.

Sun-Times reporter, that is one hell of a scoop! How did you find out Bartman was listening to an illicit recording? I can only imagine how deviant Bartman truly is to go to a playoff Cubs game and be listening to the Big Bopper buttslam and humiliate Screech! Just imagine the connections Bartman must have had to get access to something that depraved. I bet when he was going for the ball he heard an enormous fart being ripped right in Screech’s face, distracting him from Moises Alou’s presence!

Pig Pen said...

Buuuurrrrrrrrppppppppppp!! Yeee-hawww! Boys, it’s that time of year! I’m glad to see this board is running strong. Thanksgiving is coming up next week and I was going to report that we couldn’t have our annual Thanksgiving through New Years fiesta at the Iowa 80 truck stop. After many fine years there they have said we aren’t welcome back due to us scaring off all the hetero customers! We were going to sue them but now I see a potential option.

Mitch, I believe your fine Motel 6 seems to be the perfect place to hoat our bacchanal of depravity. We will take all your rooms (minus any needed for celebrity guests like Mr. Horton or Corky). We will stay from next Tuesday through January 2nd. Our rooms will not need to be cleaned, but there will be a lot of buttslamming, farts, belches, and flying jizz! Do you have a spa? If not I’d ask you out in a large jacuzzi. We truckers like to relax and let the floaters loose! Let me know soon Mitch!

Ass Breath said...

Hey gang, I was filling up my car at the Philips 66 gas station across the street from the Motel 6 and I can tell you that the scene at the Motel 6 was off the hook! I was about 150 feet away from a room where Anthony Rizzo and Steve Bartman were rooming, but I could hear unbelievably loud farts from where I was standing! I also heard loud butt-slamming and several 10-second window-rattling belches. Then, all of a sudden, I heard what sounded like a hippopotamus bellowing followed by an utterance of “Zoinks!” The door to the Bartman room opened and Steve Bartman limped out covered in a layer of semen and feces! He went to a vending machine to buy a couple bags of candy before returning to his room for round two with Anthony Rizzo. I had filled up my car by then, so I proceeded on my way.

Hillary Schieve said...

I am the mayor of Reno Nevada and am disgusted by recent events! The activity at our local Motel 6 is reprehensible and I have had hundreds of citizens contact me about the outrageous behavior being conducted there. One woman called to tell me she was driving past the Motel 6 in her minivan with her two children when they heard loud farts coming from the motel 6, then looked over to see a pack of deranged men openly jerking off! She said her son heard the fart and pressed his ass to her head and ripped a small blast, then said the man who farted that loud was his hero. She lost control of her van and almost drove into a ditch! A family man was driving by when he smelled the stench of anus. He immediately abandoned his family, and spent their mortgage payment on a luxury swivel chair and snacks from the vending machine! He was last spotted jerking off wildly and licking a fat guys butthole! I have had numerous noise complaints regarding earth shattering farts and close by businesses call and say the queer activity is chasing away their customers! I demand this stop immediately or I will be forced to shut down the Motel 6 for being a public nuisance!

Mitch said...

Mayor Schieve, your complaints will be taken under consideration. However, the city budget is dependent upon revenue from tourism. There is a huge amount of money being spent by mentally deranged queers looking to get their kink on! As you are aware, my Motel 6 is located near the Reno-Sparks Livestock Events Center. The Reno Rodeo took place there last June and brought money into the city, but tourism has dried up until my motel hosted Corky, A-Rod, and Mr. Belding and brought demented queers with money to spend to Reno! I have heard that more tourism dollars were spent last week as a result of the Motel 6 festivities than were spent during the Reno Rodeo this year!

So please give us some leeway to do our thing - the entire city benefits from this.

- Mitch

P.S. If I weren’t gay, I would do you. You have a MILF look about you.

Hillary Schieve said...

Mitch, you are a cretin. I would never let you touch me. I drove past the Motel 6 today to see if anything had changed and to see if they were being responsible members of our community. I was appalled at what I found. When I pulled in I saw a sign that say “free donkey rides” and felt this was a positive sign Motel 6 was trying to make amends and create a family friendly environment. What I found made me puke. I noticed there were at least a hundred members of the LGBTQ community, all of them male, and all watching something while pleasuring themselves. I then saw that Corky was riding a donkey while nude except for a cowboy hat. Mr. Belding was holding onto a rope and was leading the donkey while also feeding it an enormous amount of Taco Bell. Then I noticed that A Rod, who was wearing a filthy Yankees uniform, had a rope tied around him and was being pulled by the donkey. The rope was incredibly tight and his head was directly below the donkey. The Taco Bell, and weight of Corky made the donkey groan, then release a torrent of shit directly onto A Rod. A Rod opened his mouth wide and gobbled up the shit spray while the crowd cheered wildly and jizz began flying! A bunch of deviants began buttslamming each other and I vomited, then ran to my car. I had parked next to an old van, and when I got there the side door opened and a drunk and disoriented black man who I recognized as “Dudley” fell out while wearing only a pair of underoos! Mr. Horton stepped out of the van and gave Dudley some pills and glass of what looked like wine! I got out of there in a hurry and have never been more terrified! Mitch, is this how you take my complaints “under consideration”? Tomorrow morning I will be going to court to get an injunction to shut down that hell hole!

Long-Haul Trucker said...

I don’t understand why the mayor is so against what is going on at the Motel Six. I’m a long- haul trucker and I was in my Kenworth hauling logs from Washington state down to Texas when I got off the I-80 in Reno to eat dinner at the Denny’s down the street from the Motel 6. I sat down at a booth near the window of the Denny’s and was shocked to see Corky from Life Goes On ruthlessly butt-slamming Alex Rodriguez! I then saw that the guy from Saved By The Bell, Mr. Belding, was feeding Taco Bell to a donkey. It was a strange sight, as I’m pretty sure that donkeys aren’t supposed to eat greasy faux Mexican food. As the mayor pointed out, the donkey suddenly groaned and then sprayed an enormous amount of dookie onto A-Rod’s head and into his mouth! I’m not gay or anything, but it was pretty hot and I blew a huge load semen in my pants! I then heard some insanely loud farts as about 10 guys turned away from A-Rod and positioned themselves so that their asses were in his face and then ripped loud farts which I could hear from the inside of the Denny’s - it was amazing, seeing as how the Denny’s is .3 miles away and on the other side of the I-80 highway! After that, it was hard to hear anything over the sound of 20 guys sitting in swivel office-type chairs loudly jerking off as they smacked around their dongs in delight! Anyhow, I ended up eating my hamburger meal and then drove to a Salvation Army second-hand store down the street to purchase a new pair of pants before I got back on the I-80 and continued on my trip to Texas!

Bernie Madoff Fanatic said...

Hello Mitch. I am looking to book your Thanksgiving package at your fine Motel 6. Will you be serving special holiday meals, like a turkey that has been cooked with Mr. Beldings farts? What is the schedule for entertainment, and will celebrities be in attendance? I saw Pig Pen, who I have run into on many occasions, will be there with his convoy of deranged truckers. I am hopeful I can get a room and will be staying indefinitely. Let me know pricing and options for the high end traveler.

Tom Bodett said...

I am Tom Bodett and I have been doing commercials for Motel 6 for over 30 years. Normally I let people know “we’ll leave the light on for you”. I want to make it clear that there is no light on for any of you deranged losers, or your donkey! Motel 6 is a budget chain meant for families looking for safe and inexpensive lodgings, and for weary travelers looking to get a good nights sleep at a fair price. It IS NOT a hangout for deviant homosexuals to lurk and jack off at pseudo celebrities like Mr. Belding, farting and buttslamming each other. Only the most depraved of the depraved get off from hearing an obese man’s loud farts. Farts that disturb families and other upstanding customers! If you are lookimg for a good nights sleep at a fair price Motel 6 welcomes you. If you’re looking for donkeys, farts, buttslamming, flying jizz, monster belches, or any other deviant behavior I beg you stay away!

Advertising Executive said...

Tom Bodett, you are missing a golden opportunity here to help promote Motel 6. There needs to be a commercial where you discuss how Motel 6 is a part of Americana and is central to the local community. Then the camera zooms in on a motel room which has its lights off - it appears as though someone is moving in the darkness, although there is insufficient light to determine what is going on in the room. You proceed to say your trademark “We’ll leave the light on” catchphrase and then the light switch suddenly turns on, revealing that Corky is viciously butt-slamming A-Rod in one bed while Mr. Belding watches an “Inspector Gadget” cartoon while lying in the other bed stuffing his face with Doritos and pie before ripping a window-rattling fart as the commercial ends!

Weirdo said...

There is a hot dumpster scene behind the Washoe County Clerk building across the street from the Reno Motel 6. A homeless man and I were busy tonguing each other’s buttholes in between dumpsters when I heard a ruckus across the street. I saw A-Rod dressed up in a Jew-fro wig and he was wearing rainbow colored pants which were down around his ankles. Corky and Mr. Belding were there and they were also pantsless - they had huge bellies and enormous foot long dongs whereas A-Rod had six-pack abs but sported a tiny dong which was the size of a pencil eraser! Corky then started giving it to A-Rod right in the ass while Mr. Belding stood in front of A-Rod with his bare ass mere inches from A-Rod’s nose. Mr. Belding was chowing down on a bag of greasy tacos from Taco Bell while standing there. Mr. Belding suddenly ripped an enormous fart in A-Rod’s face which caused A-Rod to utter, “Zoinks!” Corky then pounded away on A-Rod’s anus while a legion of queers sitting on old office chairs masturbated loudly! It was pretty hot and I jizzed all over the homeless man I was with and farted in his face before pulling up my pants abd walking across the street to get a better view!

Pig Pen said...

Buuuuuurrrrrrrppppppp! Boys I’m in town and ready to party! Myself and my convoy of 75 truckers pulled in to find the scene Weirdo just regaled you with. When I saw it I nearly crashed my Big Rig into the side of the building! I’m now set in my room 3 doors down from Mr. Belding, Corky, and A Rod, two doors down from Mr. Horton and Dudley, and next door to Anthony Rizzo and Steve Bartman! I can’t believe how many dudes are splurging for old swivel chairs! There must be 20 of them. The smell of rank ass permeates everywhere, and the sounds of buttslamming, Zoinks, farts and belches are everywhere. One amazing feature is this Motel 6 has a closed circuit channel that plays the old SBTB New Class Spice Channel versions 24/7! There is also a pool in the courtyard area of the hotel that has about 50 floaters in it, along with some humongous Hanes underwear and some water wings with “Corky” on them. Most of my trucker buddies are on the second level and have been jerking off onto the swivel chair patrons! Talk about hot and spicy! I saw Anthony Rizzo carrying in 6 pizzas. Steve Bartman was holding the door for him, and as he passed him Anthony jumped in the air and ripped an insanely loud fart in his face. Bartman yelled “Zoinks” and fell to the ground, convulsing while jizzing himself. I cannot believe how depraved this Motel 6 has become in a few short weeks. If only SBF could be here to man the bathrooms! At check in Mitch told me there will be no turkey on Thursday, but there will be a deep dish pepperoni feast, as well as belching and farting competition!

Weirdo said...

I heard that Mr. Belding and Corky are going to have a Thanksgiving barbecue to honor Screech’s memory. Apparently they are going to adopt a few abandoned hound dogs from the pound and cook them for dinner just like they used to cook Screech’s “Hound Dog”! It sound horrifying, but it is their Thanksgiving tradition and they are going to do this while Corky buttslams A-Rod in front of several rows of random queers sitting bare-ass naked in old office chairs while loudly jerking off! I also heard that Corky has rented a velvet rope and those metal line divider things on which velvet ropes are attached, so that Corky has enough space to buttslam A-Rod! I heard a rumor that the stench of sweaty balls and anuses is overwhelming on several of the swivel chairs and that Corky plans to get some fresh new ones and will sell the old stinky ones on eBay in case anyone is interested!

Pig Pen said...

Weirdo, you are totally correct. The pepperoni pizza buffet and farting competition will be held at lunchtime, followed by a delicious Hound Dog dinner. I am so lucky to have a room close to the action. I can relax in my room eating tons of food while watching the buttslamming and other hot action out my window! I have seen A Rod numerous times, but never out of his “Screech” costume. Corky is demanding everyone call A Rod “Screech” and A Rod seems to enjoy the humiliation. After buttslamming him right in front of my room today he took a nasty dump in A Rod’s mouth. It looked like a soft serve ice cream came from Corky’s ass and Wes then gobbled up by A Rod. The deranged queers went insane for this and jizz flew everywhere!

Ass Scratcher said...

Guys, there was just a bit of a health scare for A Rod. He was getting buttslammed by Corky and A Rod all of a sudden began groaning and saying he felt sick. Corky told him to quit whining, then continued ass slamming him. At some point as the swivel chair crowd went wild A Rod fell over and collapsed. Corky jizzed all over him and Mr. B came over and said he’d take care of it then ripped a bunch of heinous farts right in A Rod’s face. When this didn’t work Mitch called 911 and an ambulance came. When the EMT’s checked A Rod they asked if he’d been eating a large amount of feces recently as they had seen this many times at dumpster parties. Corky told them he’d been feeding A Rod a lot of “doody” lately and then began laughing. The EMT’s laughed at adorable Corky then said A Rod was just sick from all the bacteria and parasites in the shit. They gave him some shots of penicillin and other antibiotics, while also giving him some oxygen. A Rod began coming to and Mr. Belding waddled over, ripped the air hose from the oxygen tank, and ripped a powerful fart into it. When it hit A Rod he yelled “Zoinks” then convulsed in pleasure while jizzing his pants. The EMT’s laughed again, then called A Rod a giant faggot and told him to cut back on his feces consumption. They then put their gear back in their ambulance and did a massive burnout right in A Rod’s face!

Pig Pen said...

Buuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrrrpppppppp! Boys, the feasting is off the hook. Happy Thanksgiving to everyone! We just finished the first annual Motel 6 Pepperoni feast and farting completion. Legendary pepperoni fart champion Steve Anus made a special appearance and judged the competition. Mr. Belding ate two large Pizza Hut deep dish pepperoni pizza’s himself, then ripped a fart so powerful it cracked a few windows! Corky wasn’t bad at all and ripped a few nice blasts. A Rod ripped a squeaky fart that was just pathetic and he was booed by everyone. Corky told A Rod he was a disgrace. A bunch of truckers then went and the place reeked of ass, but in the end Steve Anus made it clear Mr. Belding easily won! He was given a small trophy, a coupon for a small personal pan pizza at Pizza Hut, and a high five by his best friend Corky. Currently Mr. B and Corky are roasting a few Hound Dogs and the smell of burnt hair permeates the air. Corky keeps telling A Rod his ass will be barking later tonight after he eats Hound Dog. A Rod has tried to complain and say he isn’t eating dog for Thanksgiving but Corky just winds up his arm and threatens A Rod with a beating if he ruins Thanksgiving dinner. A Rod is dressed as Screech, and everyone is calling him Screech. He seems to be enjoying that.

Mitch said...

We had a little excitement yesterday when an ambulance was dispatched because A-Rod felt sick. A-Rod really needs to eat feces in moderation- he obviously has been eating far too much of Corky’s foodies recently!

We have a nice pizza dinner planned tonight for our guests. We are preparing deep dish pizzas with a twist. Instead of pepperoni or sausage, the meat on these pizzas with be ground of pieces of cooked hound dogs. If you think that pepperoni pizza causes rank farts, be prepared as hound dog pizza farts are far more potent! I have no doubt that several of our guests will Jizz all over their swivel office chairs when they catch a whiff of a 12-second wet fart from Mr. Belding after he’s devoured a 14-in dee dish hound dog pizza!!

Mitch said...

Damn autocorrect! I meant that A-Rod has been eating far to many of Corky’s doodies, not foodies!

Larry Dong said...

Pig Pen, thanks for the field report on that farting contest. I’m not surprised that Mr. Belding won it his only competitors were Corky and A-Rod. Mr. Belding eats junk food and red meat constantly, so he definitely has the fuel for some powerful and stinky farts! But I have to ask - where the hell was Anthony Rizzo?? He won a string of pepperoni fart contests a few years ago when he still played for the Chicago Cubs and ate deep dish pizza and Taco Bell constantly. I heard he’s still staying at the Motel 6 in Reno, so his absence is surprising. I wonder whether he was too busy butt-slamming Steve Bartman?

Pig Pen said...

Larry, there were at least a dozen truckers who also competed, and a trucker named Fart Goblin came in 2nd place behind Mr. Belding. It was kind of funny as A Rod was sitting by Fart Goblin who weighs well over 500 pounds. When it was his turn Fart Goblin stood up, bent over, and ripped a mighty fart. It was powerful enough that it blew off A Rod’s absurd ‘fro wig. That angered Corky greatly and he smacked A Rod around and accused him of cheating on him with Fart Goblin’s fart!! A Rod began crying and grabbed his wig and ran back to his room. I was surprised Anthony Rizzo didn’t attend. As I said their room is next to mine and I have only seen them twice. However I hear non stop farts and buttslamming coming from their room. I did see Bartman, who was limping badly, come out and get a few Hound Dog pizza’s last night. He immediately carried them back to the room he shared with Rizzo. Later in I heard some earth shattering farts.

Jamie said...

I eat dinner at the Arby’s on Northtowne Lane a couple times a week. I was enjoying a delicious chicken sandwich last Tuesday when Corky, Mr. Belding, and A-Rod showed up. Mr. Belding ordered about ten sandwiches and A-Rod paid for the meal. It was strange because A-Rod was dressed up as Screech from Saved By The Bell and Corky kept referring to A-Rod as “Screech” while repeatedly calling him a “hook nosed faggot” and threatened to take a dump into the Jew-fro wig A-Rod was wearing. It was certainly a strange sight! So after the order of ten sandwiches came out, they took the sandwiches to a booth. A-Rod sat down first and Mr. Belding looked like he was about to sit down next to A-Rod - he crouched down, but instead of sitting at the booth, he positioned his ass near A-Rod’s face and then ripped a loud fart which rattled the window by the booth and quickly stunk up the restaurant! Corky started laughing hysterically as A-Rod gasped for fresh air! A-Rod then grabbed one of the sandwiches and Corky threw his iPhone at A-Rod’s head and told him he would eat later as these sandwiches were for he and Mr. Belding. Mr. Belding then proceeded to eat nine of the sandwiches while Corky ate the other one. After finishing, Corky said that it was time for A-Rod’s meal and then he, A-Rod, and Mr. Belding went into the men’s room. I can’t say exactly what happened, but I did hear some butt-slamming and loud farts coming from the men’s room! Someone also told me that he heard Corky yell, “eat that doodie!” So this may explain why A-Rod had the medical scare recently from consuming a dangerous amount of feces as Ass Scratcher mentioned the other day.

Barf said...

Jamie, thank you for that erotic field report! Did you notice any massive orders of curly fries? Mr. Belding is known to be very fond of them, and it was reported on a few occasions he made Screech eat them directly from his butthole. I’m wondering if A Rod Screech gobbled up any Curly fries from Corky’s filthy asshole?

Jamie said...

Barf, the strange thing is that all of the sandwiches were part of the Arby’s meals and each came with fries and a soda. I don’t understand what the point of that was seeing as how Mr. Belding could have gotten ten refills of one soda cup instead of getting ten different soda cups. But I suppose that Mr. Belding didn’t care because A-Rod was the one paying for the meal, not him, and he didn’t want to exert the effort to keep getting up to walk the ten feet to the soda machine to refill his soda cup. But in any event, Mr. Belding did appear to get curly fries with most of the sandwiches. I don’t know whether he placed any in the crack of his ass for A-Rod to eat, although it certainly wouldn’t surprise me.

A-Hawk said...


To the posters of this fine board, I have been wondering if i imagined something.

I was at the Reno Motel 6 last week before it all kicked off. Nothing to report and i was just there as I work in the car business and was inspecting a shop. However, a man calling himself 'Mylo' came up to me and asked "why you jivin' on the north side of town fool? Git yo' ass down to Americas Best Travel Inn across the road"

I had no idea what he was talking about, but as I left, I saw numerous patrons dressed up as the Fresh Prince, Duane and DJ Jazzy Jeff from the Fresh Prince of Bel Air. There were even a few big dudes dressed up as Uncle Phil. Many of them had their soiled underoos showing and some of them were even re-enacting episodes from the show, such as the times when Uncle Phil threw the Jazzy Jeff out of the door, these deranged lunatics were doing it by throwing other men into dumpsters and moaning loudly. The theme song was blaring for hours at night too - the dumpster party went crazy when 'boom, shake the room!' came on

Can you please confirm that I am not imagining things?

Reno Resident said...

A Hawk, the Americas Best Travel Inn is an eyesore in Reno. I have lived in Reno for the past 20 years and that Inn is frequently a problem and it makes Motel 6 seem like a luxury motel in comparison. There was some type of family reunion for a family with the surname “Jefferson.” I drove past that hotel the other day and it looked like the Klump family from Eddie Murphy’s “Nutty Professor” remake was staying there. There were many big fat guys who kind of looked like Uncle Phil. I’m not sure whether any gay orgies were occurring, although I heard that a bunch of cars in the parking lot had their hubcaps stolen…

Travel Adviser said...

Everyone should read the Yelp reviews for the America’s Best Travel Inn in Reno! It is rated 1.1 out of 5 based on 31 reviews. There are also photos of cockroaches and of a false bathroom mirror where some weirdo was allegedly visible standing behind it. There are also reviews claiming that they’re crackheads and hookers all around and inside rooms at the motel. A couple reviews claim that people would be better off sleeping outside under the highway underpass instead of in the filthy motel rooms! Another review claims that the neighborhood behind the motel is filled with homeless people. There are also photos on blood on a wall of one of the rooms which the maid service never bothered to clean off.

https://yelp.to/lYnPje2y9z

Mitch said...

My Motel 6 is significantly higher rated than the roach motel known as the America’s Best Travel Inn! We received a rating of 2.0 on Yelp from 112 reviews, nearly double the score of the America’s Best Travel Inn. Read our reviews and you’ll see why Corky and Mr. Belding chose to stay at our fine motel to engage in their shenanigans with A-Rod.

I also wanted to respond to the person who posted an image of a huge blood stain on a mattress and who wondered whether someone was murdered in the bed in their room - you should know that our maids flipped the mattress over and wiped it down with a Wet-One, so you have nothing to worry about. It may look like blood, but it was actually a ketchup and Kool-Aid stain on that mattress. So it is of no concern.

Barf said...

Travel Advisor, thank you so much for steering me to those heinous reviews of the Americas Best Travel Inn! It sounds like a complete hell hole! Many of the reviews mentioned an angry fat lady who seemed to manage and own the dump. I can only imagine how smelly her nasty queefs must be. Nothing seems to get washed, and it must have been a nice surprise to find a two way mirror with some deviant lurking behind it! It sounds like the parking lot is where the action really peaks with dudes working on crappy cars, and pimps and hookers plying their trades all night long. The nicest thing anyone had to say was the Denny’s was close by! The Motel 6 is a far superior choice with a pool, and a much higher caliber room. It isn’t as close to the Denny’s as Americas Best is which might annoy Mr. Belding. Americas Best is listed as a one star motel, whereas the Motel 6 is a 2 star!! It also sounds like Americas Best is a place for low class hetero’s. The Motel 6 seems to cater to middle class raging queers. Corky and Mr. Belding definitely picked the right motel for their months long holiday vacation!

Jerry Supiran said...

Hey guys. I figured I’d chime in. Some of you may remember me as Jaime from the show Small Wonder. I’m very familiar with the Americas Best Travel Inn. While I was homeless I would occasionally get enough change from panhandling to get a room there. I’d only do this if was really cold or snowing. I greatly preferred living under the overpass. That hotel many times didn’t even have heat in the dead of winter, and one time when I complained some obese woman showed up in my room and ripped some nasty farts, then claimed she had provided me personal service and warmed my room. It was gross. I always heard things moving around in the walls, and now think it was likely people. I always wanted to stay at the Motel 6 but it was far too expensive and luxurious for me. I then moved to central California to stay near my brother who didn’t have room in his house for me, but helped me find a really nice bridge to live under! Thankfully life has taken a turn for the good and I am no longer homeless.

Biff said...

I stayed at the Americas Best Travel Inn about 10 years ago. I was in town on business at the livestock center and my cheap company wouldn’t even spring for the motel 6. Anyway, when I checked in the guy in front of me was that Screech guy. I overheard him mention he was doing his comedy act at a nearby 7-11. He had a massive Jew fro and multicolored pants that had what looked to be a large shit stain. After I checked into my room I went to Denny’s and ate a bunch of greasy food, then retired to my room to watch a movie on my laptop. The AC barely worked so I laid on the bed in my boxers. I noticed how gross the room was and the only piece of art was some horrible painting that had eyes that seemed to watch me when I moved around the room. I was watching the movie when the greasy food I’d eaten created a gurgling in my stomach. A few later I ripped a nasty fart. It was pretty loud and at least 3 seconds long. Moments after releasing it I heard someone yell “Zoinks” then heard scurrying in the walls right where that odd picture was! I can’t be positive but I think that Screech guy was in the walls leering at me and likely pleasuring himself. I didn’t see him the rest of the trip but someone did call my room phone about 50 times that night. They never said anything but I could hear breathing!

Ass Plunderer said...

Biff, I stayed at the America’s Best Travel Inn myself back in 2017. It was a huge dump then and I also heard something in the walls. I initially assumed that it was rats or possible even squirrels until I heard a loud rumbling noise. I wasn’t sure what that noise was until a heinous stench started coming through the wall! I then realized that it had to be a loud fart! Then I heard what sounded like someone dropping marbles. I got close to a mirror on the wall and discovered that pro baseball player Alex Rodriguez was in the on his knees and he was there with two fat guys who were naked - one had a mongoloid look about him and the other was morbidly obese and was stuffing his face with pizza and was holding and empty bag of M&M’s. I think he must have accidentally spilled M&M’s from the bag and that was the marble- like sound I had heard. I looked closer and realized that the mongoloid was Corky from Life Goes On and the obese guy was Mr. Belding! They were on opposite sides of A-Rod and were ripping ass against the wall and right in A-Rod’s face! I throw a towel over the mirror to get a small degree of privacy from those degenerates and was about to get into bed when I noticed dookie stains on the sheets and pubes all over the floor! It was disgusting, but the motel manager wouldn’t let me switch rooms or refund my money. It was a terrible experience - I should have stayed at the Motel 6!

Angie said...

Hey y’all suckas! It’s Angie, the owner and general manager of the luxurious Americas Best Travel Inn! I’m sick of you fools talking smack about my fine motel. When you stay at a one star motel you knows what yous gettin into! If yo askin, yes I did fart in a room to warm it up! That customer service to da max! I waz tryin to get retard faggits to stay at my place, and even let weirdos lurk in the walls and peer at customers. You know how much a damn peepin Tom wants to pay? They never have no money! I thought I hit da jackpot when A Rod stayed with his two weirdo friends. But now they at the Motel 6 living it up and stealin all my business. I hate Mitch, who lures all my hard earned customer to hiz lavish motel! I got a damn Denny’s in my parking lot fools! Thoze reviews is made up crap. You mind yo bizness when you stayz here. No mind peeps workin on cars or havin a good time pimps and ho’s! They ain’t botherin no one. They add some spice and class! I’m gonna git dem customers back Mitch!

Daniel said...

Angie’s motel is a huge dump! I am the night manager at the Vagabond Inn (also known as Travellers Inn) located at 3131 S Virginia St in Reno. Unlike the crappy 1.1 Yelp rating for America’s Best Travel Inn, my Vagabond Inn has a fantastic rating of 1.5 stars out of 5. Stay here if you want a luxurious night! Please disregard the photo on Yelp of the dookie stain on the white sheets and the other photo of the pee-stained sheets - that only happened a couple times when Louie Anderson stayed here and forgot to get out of bed before going to the bathroom. But those sheets have since been washed, so don’t worry about it. Also, please disregard the boarded up windows on some of the rooms - it isn’t as if drug addicts are going to enter those rooms to smoke crack or anything like that.

https://yelp.to/u5pCxKlGuN

Larry Dong said...

Daniel, any hotel with the word “Vagabond” in its title has to be a top-end place! Also, your hotel’s other “Traveller” title, apparently named after the Irish Travellers, is undoubtedly a sign of an excellent and trustworthy hotel.