The first story is about Gary Moody, a man arrested in 2005 in New Hampshire:
Man Pulled From Women's Outhouse Tank
Teenager Reports Seeing Man's Face In Toilet
POSTED: 4:56 pm EDT June 28, 2005
UPDATED: 6:18 pm EDT June 28, 2005
ALBANY, N.H. -- A man is facing charges after police said they pulled him from a tank under a women's toilet that was filled with human waste.
Police said that Gary Moody, 45, was under a log cabin outhouse off the Kancamagas Highway in Albany.
"You can draw your own conclusions as to the conditions we encountered," said Capt. John Hebert, of the Carroll County Sheriff's Department.
Police said that they got a call from the parents of a teenage girl who said that when she went to use the facilities, she saw Moody's face staring back at her from the hole.
Moody was hosed off before police cuffed him.
"It's a very filthy environment, and before we put anybody in contact with him, we had to decontaminate him," Hebert said. "We treated him as if he were hazardous material."
Hikers using the outhouse on Tuesday said that the story was enough to make their stomachs turn.
"He just must be sick to put yourself in that muck. Disgusting," said Harriett Voysey, of New Jersey.
Police said they don't know how long Moody was in the tank, but they said the door to it was locked, which means he must have gone in through the toilet. They said they don't know why he was there.
"I started this business in 1980, and I have never in my career encountered anybody in this type of situation," Hebert said.
Police charged Moody with criminal trespass, and they said he could face more charges. He is out on bail and due back in court next month.
The second story is about Donald H. Baker, a man arrested in 1987 in California:
My Two Cents
by Hosey R. Horton
It takes all kinds of people, but...
It may just be my imagination, or maybe it's all due to the fact that since I'm not over the mid-century mark, I just don't remember all that well how things were when I was a youth.
Whatever the truth of the matter, it does seem as if there are far more than two but crooks around than there ever were. And it also seems as if there's more weirdos around, too; some of them just weird and some of them somewhat dangerous.
New depths - no pun intended - were reached recently by a California man who, dressed in plastic with surgical gloves, was dragged out from beneath a woman's outhouse at Montana de Oro State Park and arrested.
Donald H. Baker, San Luis Obispo County officials said, was sitting on crates beneath a woman's outhouse up to this waist in muck, ostensibly in an effort to get his kicks by watching women go to the bathroom,
Rangers at the park, after forcibly removing Baker from the outhouse, hosed him off with a garden hose and then turned him over to deputies who arrested him.
Can you imagine how that poor deputy felt with Baker smelling up the back seat during the drive to the jail house? Gas masks will probably take on a new meaning in San Luis Obispo County.
When last heard of, Baker was whiling away his time in jail on charges of loitering. You can almost imagine a jailhouse conversation. "What are you in for?" someone asks Baker. "Loitering,: he replies.
Topping the story of someone who's weird enough to crawl under an outhouse will be tough, maybe impossible, but there's a lot of other weirdness around, and we're not even talking about the two clowns now doing their best to make Spokane Rape City U.S.A. on the city's northside.
Consider for example the saga of singer Michael Jackson ...