Did Dustin Diamond Date Joe Exotic?

Joe Maldonado, better known as "Joe Exotic," is the star of a recently released Netflix documentary series entitled "Tiger King: Murder, Mayhem and Madness."  The documentary details Joe Exotic's life operating a large private zoo filled primarily with large cats such as tigers and lions, and also delves into his sexuality including his various homosexual relationships.   The documentary also exposed him as a self-professed gay redneck mullet-headed tiger breeder.

As many of you are aware, Dustin Diamond is down on his luck and supposedly currently works as an unpaid bathroom attendant handing out paper towels and offering breath mints to random men who have just expelled the contents of their bowels and urinated at men's rooms.  But apparently there is another rumor floating around the Internet which says that Diamond had a brief relationship with Joe Exotic a few years ago!

Diamond was looking at YouTube videos back in 2015 when he discovered the JoeExoticTV channel and started looking at the videos of Joe Exotic discussing his daily life at the zoo and complaining about "Fuckin' Bitch" Carole Baskin.

Diamond likes animals and immediately fell in love with Joe Exotic's sexy mullet and decided he had to meet the man.  So Diamond hopped on a Greyhound bus and managed to eventually make his way down to Wynnewood, Oklahoma where he went to Joe Exotic's Greater Wynnewood Exotic Animal Park.  Once he arrived, Diamond was so hungry that he ate one of the zoo's homemade pizzas filled with ingredients taken from expired food dumped into the dumpster behind the local Wal-Mart.

Diamond then went to use the bathroom and ran into the Joe Exotic at the urinal next to his!  Diamond introduced himself as "Screech" from "Saved By The Bell" and said he was a big fan and loved the pizza he had just eaten.  Joe Exotic replied that he had never seen "Saved By The Bell" but was glad that he liked the pizza.  Diamond then went into the animal park and enjoyed looking at the animals and loved it when one of the lions peed on him!

At around 8PM that night, the zoo closed and Diamond left along with the other visitors that day.  Diamond did not have a place to stay, so he decided to sleep on the side of the road next to a family of raccoons he had seen on his way in.  In the middle of the night, Diamond snuck into Exotic Joe's trailer and attempted to wake him up by rubbing his balls in Exotic Joe's face!  Exotic Joe woke up and was none too pleased by Diamond's transgression!

Joe Exotic pulled out his pistol and hit Diamond in the face with it and then kicked him out of the trailer!  Then Joe Exotic pulled down Diamond's Zubaz and started butt-slamming him in front of a tiger enclosure while several workers at the park watched while smoking crystal meth!  Joe Exotic suddenly roared like a lion while blowing his load into Diamond's brownpipe!  Joe Exotic proceeded to kick Diamond out of the park, accused him of being a spy for Carole Baskin!  Joe Exotic sure taught Diamond a lesson that time!

Photo of Dustin "Screech" Diamond as an Unpaid Bathroom Attendant

As many of you are aware, Dustin "Screech" Diamond is apparently an unpaid bathroom attendant.  His acting career is all but done and he has abandoned his dreams of performing in a band and being a stand-up comedian.  In order to make ends meet, he has started pursuing a job as an unpaid bathroom attendant.  He enjoys hanging out in men's rooms while listening to random strangers pee, taking dumps, and rip heinous farts.  He hands paper towels to bathroom patrons and offers them mints and samples of cologne in exchange for tips.

Here is a recent picture of him working in his new profession.  This picture was apparently taken in a highway rest stop in New Jersey a few ago. I'm glad to see he's finally getting his life back on track!

Mr. Belding Teaches Screech a Lesson About the Coronavirus

Screech and Mr. Belding have been down on their luck ever since Bayside High School temporarily laid off its employees and independent contractors.  Even though Mr. Belding is a high school principal with a salary in excess of $200k, he has little savings due to his addictions to gay porn, cocaine, and Dunkin' Donuts.  Screech, on the other hand, is in an even worse situation as he works solely for tips as an unpaid bathroom attendant and has been unable to work for the past several weeks.  Being short on cash, Screech and Mr. Belding have temporarily moved into a YMCA which offers cheap rooms and has a community bathroom at the end of their hall.

Even though he weighs 400 lbs and is nearly 70 years old, Mr. Belding still has a voracious sexual appetite and has his way with Screech every night when he has rough anal sex with Screech and makes Screech tongue his anus!  The other day after eating 7 large burritos from Taco Bell, Mr. Belding waddled to the bathroom to take a massive dump.  While taking a dump, Screech was in the men's room washing his hands and he heard Mr. Belding rip an insanely loud fart.  Screech then realized that he had to take a dump of his own, so he entered a stall near Mr. Belding's and sat down and squeaked out a pathetic excuse for a fart.  When Mr. Belding heard Screech's fart, he was irate and yelled at Screech for interrupting his dump and for possibly exposing him to the Coronavirus!  Screech replied, "Zoinks!  Oopsie!  Sorry Chief, but I had to go!"  Screech also pointed out that he had just eaten our Mr. Belding's ass and had been on the receiving end of anal sex from Mr. Belding a mere 30 minutes earlier and that there was therefore no way that he could catch the Coronavirus from him.

Mr. Belding was so angry at Screech that he jumped off his toilet and kicked open the door to Screech's stall even though his pants were still down and he still had feces stuck in his asscrack!  Mr. Belding then punched Screech in his huge nose and grabbed Screech by the Jew-fro and launched him into a sink!  Mr. Belding then wiped his ass clean with Screech's coarse Jew-fro before ripping a wet fart in Screech's face!  Mr. Belding then told Screech to clean himself up and go buy a deep dish pepperoni pizza for him to eat later!

Mr. Belding sure taught Screech a lesson about the Coronavirus that time!

 

Dustin Diamond Took a Job at NBC Studios Last Year

Dustin Diamond was notoriously excluded from the upcoming reboot of Saved By The Bell, the show on which he starred for more than a decade back in the late 1980s-90s.  However, I have it on good authority that he has taken a job with NBC Studios again, his first full-time job in 20 years!  This is an account which I discovered posted in another forum:

I visited the NBC Studios in Burbank, California last year and toured the old Saved By The Bell set!  I got to walk through The Max, down the halls of Bayside, and peeked into Mr. Belding's office.  I actually sat in the three-wheeled golf cart where the SBTB gang learned to drive in Driver's Ed, and I ventured into the boy's locker room where Mr. Belding used to lift weights right in front of adolescent boys changing during gym class.  It was a fun time reminiscing about one of my favorite TV shows from long ago.

After the tour, our guide took us to the food court.  It was the most unusual food court I've ever seen as they only offered pizza for sale and the only option was deep dish pepperoni pizza!  And if that wasn't strange enough the only liquid refreshment available was large cups of Mountain Dew - they didn't even have a water fountain!  I was famished so I purchased a slice of the pizza and the Mountain Dew and then found a table where I gobbled down the food and watched an old Saved By The Bell episode which was airing on TVs in the cafeteria - they were playing the "Miss Bayside" episode where Screech won a beauty contest.

About 5 minutes after eating, I felt a rumbling in my belly and realized that I needed to find a men's room where I could go #2.  Fortunately, there was a men's room nearby although when I walked in there were only two stalls and both were occupied.  There was also a line of five men in front of me.  There was a bathroom attendant who looked like a weirdo - he was standing near the sink and had a small display of breath mints, cologne, and paper towels.  He also was also a fat white guy who had a big poofy curly 'fro.  

While I was standing in line, a man in front of me ripped a heinous pepperoni fart and it stunk up the men's room!  The bathroom attendant walked up to the man and then knelt down and started sniffing his ass before saying, 'Well played!" and offering him a mint.  The attendant was so gay and enamored by the men's fart that it was very creepy.  A minute later after struggling to hold in my own fart, I unleashed a nasty fart of my mine and it smelled awful!  The bathroom attendant looked over at me with a strange smile and then asked if I wanted a mint before telling me he enjoyed my fart!

I looked over at the bathroom attendant and was shocked to discover that it was Dustin "Screech" Diamond himself!  I asked why he was a bathroom attendant and he replied that his official title was "Unpaid Bathroom Attendant" and that NBC made it clear that he was not an employee, although he was allowed to work for tips.   I then turned so that my ass was facing him and ripped another smelly fart.  He got an enormous smile on his face and then fell over convulsing while jizzing his pants!  

He's a strange guy but I'm glad he finally has a sustainable career since acting hasn't worked out for him since Saved By The Bell was cancelled 20 years ago!

Mr. Belding Makes a Coronavirus Face Mask for Screech

The United States' Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) recently recommended that everyone wear cloth face masks when out in public as a preventative measure to avoid spreading the Covid-19 Coronavirus.  When Mr. Belding heard about the recommendation, he crafted a homemade face mask for Screech to wear. Specifically, Mr. Belding saw a pair of his underwear on the floor and thought that it would be the perfect face mask for Screech to wear.

Screech walked back into Mr. Belding's home after taking out the garbage and Mr. B presented the face mask to Screech and told him to put it on and then go get him an extra large deep dish pepperoni pizza.  Screech uttered "Zoinks!" and said that he didn't want to wear the mask because there were yellow pee stains in the front and hershey stains in the back!  Screech also asked why Mr. Belding hadn't at least washed the underwear before handing it to him.  Mr. B got really angry with Screech and informed him that the pee and dookie stains serve as a natural filter to protect him from the Coronavirus!  Mr. B was also angry that Screech dared to question him and decided to teach Screech yet another lesson!  Mr. B punched Screech in his hook nose and then grabbed his Jew-fro and shoved him into a wall!  Mr. B then pulled down his underwear and grabbed Screech's face and shoved it in between his sweaty ass cheeks before ripping a wet fart.  Mr. B is notorious for failing to wipe properly and his wet fart smelled absolutely heinous!  The fart was so powerful that it snapped Screech's head back, giving him whiplash!  Mr. B then pulled down Screech's Zubaz and pounded away at Screech's anus until pulling out and blowing his STD-ridden seed into Screech's face!  Mr. B sure taught Screech about face masks that time!

"A-Rod Learns Another Lesson About the Coronavirus"

Corky likes to prank his gay lover, A-Rod, by ripping wet farts in his face to wake him up in the morning.  However, A-Rod is terrified that he his is going to catch the Coronavirus which has been rapidly spreading around the world.  Yesterday A-Rod asked Corky not to fart in his face anymore until the Coronavirus pandemic has passed.  When Corky heard this he got mad because he thought A-Rod was trying to trick him by using big words such as "pandemic."  A-Rod elaborated that he still loved Corky, but that he was afraid he would contract the Coronavirus from Corky's dookie juice which is expelled in Corky's wet farts.  Corky is immune to the Coronavirus although he can be an asymptomatic carrier as a result of his superior 'tard immune system.  Since he is immune, Corky thinks that the panic over Coronavirus is a prank.  When A-Rod begged Corky to stop farting in his face, Corky got really angry and accused A-Rod of being a liar!  Corky then slugged A-Rod right in the balls before pulling down his overflowing diaper and ripping a wet dookie-filled fart into A-Rod's mouth!  Corky yelled "Enjoy your meal, FAGGOT!!!!" as he ripped another wet fart in A-Rod's face!  Corky then grabbed an 8-pack of toilet paper A-Rod had stored in the bathroom and smacked A-Rod in the head with it!  A-Rod pleaded with Corky not to destroy the toilet paper as most places have been out of stock.  Corky then dropped the toilet paper and began ass-slamming A-Rod!  A-Rod moaned in delight although he still asked Corky to stop!  Corky then blew his 'tard load into A-Rod before grabbing a couple rolls of toilet paper and shoving them up A-Rod's brownpipe!  Corky sure taught A-Rod a lesson about the Coronavirus that time!!

"Corky Teaches A-Rod How To Purchase Diapers"

A-Rod was doing his weekly shopping last weekend when he encountered a scared mob of shoppers who cleaned store shelves of certain necessities as a result of fears over the Coronavirus.  Corky had asked A-Rod to purchase a new 124-ct package of extra large Huggies diapers.  Corky produces several gallons of urine and goes dookie multiple times a day, so he typically goes through about 12 diapers a day, so a 124-ct package usually only lasts about 10 days.  In any event, A-Rod went to his favorite stores, such as Dollar General and Wal-Mart and was disappointed to discover that there had been a run on diapers and no Huggies could be found.  Instead, A-Rod managed to locate store brand diapers at a Target.  So A-Rod purchased the Target diapers and brought them home. 

When A-Rod arrived home, Corky ran up to him and complained that his diaper was overflowing with dookie and said that he was mad that A-Rod took so long to come home with the diapers. A-Rod told Corky to settle down and suggested that he drink a Capri Sun to calm down.  A-Rod then pulled out the diaper package and showed it to Corky while saying, "Ta-da."  Corky took one look and then yelled "WHERE ARE MY HUGGIES!!!!!!"  A-Rod replied that the stores were out so he had to buy generic brand.  Corky got really mad and then flew into a 'tard rage!  Corky started slapping A-Rod in the face until A-Rod started crying!  Corky then removed his overflowing diaper and rubbed the dookie in A-Rod's face while he strangled A-Rod with the diaper!!!  Corky sprayed diarrhea while beating A-Rod and then used the diarrhea to lube up his cock upon which he started anally violating A-Rod's anus until he fired his mongo seed up A-Rod's brownpipe!

Corky really taught A-Rod to stock up on Huggies that time!

"Corky Teaches A-Rod About the Coronavirus"

A-Rod has been watching quite a bit of CNN and MSNBC lately and is terrified that he is going to catch the Coronavirus.  So he went out to a DollarTree near where he lives and bought 20 bottles of hand sanitizer which he has dispersed throughout his massive apartment.  A couple days ago, Corky, who has been potty training, went dookie in a toilet for the first time ever and was so happy that he jumped up off the toilet and ran to get A-Rod to show him what he had done.  Corky said to A-Rod, "Corky go dookie!!!" as A-Rod was eating his breakfast.  Corky then grabbed A-Rod's hand and directed him to the bathroom where Corky showed his massive dookie!  A-Rod replied that it was disgusting and that Corky clearly hadn't been paying attention to his potty training lessons as he forgot to flush the toilet.  A-Rod then asked why the sink was dry and said, "Corky, you washed your hands after going to the bathroom, didn't you?"  Corky replied that he had not and again replied. "Corky go dookie!!!"  A-Rod then told Corky that it was important that he wash his hands and also use hand sanitizer so as to prevent the spread of the Coronavirus.  Corky then got incredibly angry and red in the face as he shouted "Corky give A-Rod the chrome virus!!!"  A-Rod then replied that Corky needed to calm down and that it was known as the "Coronavirus, not the Chrome Virus."  Corky then slugged A-Rod right in the gut, causing A-Rod to double over in pain!  Corky yanked down the Yankees uniform pants which A-Rod still wears and then used some hand sanitizer to lube up his mongo cock before anally violating A-Rod!  Corky kept yelling "A-Rod fagget" while really giving it to A-Rod, right in the ass!  After a few more minutes, Corky jizzed in A-Rod's torn anus before wrapping his diaper around A-Rod's neck while choking him out!  Corky then pressed his bare ass up against A-Rod's face and ripping a nasty wet fart!  Corky said "that saves A-Rod from Chrome Virus!!!!!"  Corky then went into A-Rod's bedroom to watch cartoons while leaving A-Rod in a puddle of blood, semen, and feces!  Corky sure taught A-Rod about virology that time!

"Screech Gets Gets Promoted to the Janitor's Closet" Episode Recap

Hey Screech, remember that episode from the seventh season of Saved By The Bell: The New Class where you walked into Mr. Belding's office and saw him eating an entire can of chocolate cake frosting?  Remember how you uttered "Zoinks!" and reminded Mr. Belding that he already weighed 400 lbs and that he needed to watch when he ate?  Remember how Mr. B got really red in the face and you feared an imminent beating?  Remember how Mr. B instead thanked you for your suggestion and then said that you had been doing such a great job that he wanted to give you your own office as a reward for your valued services as his unpaid assistant?  Remember how happy this made you as you thought that you had finally earned the respect of your hero?  Remember when he led you down a hallway to a small door which had a sign on it which read "Screech's office"?  Remember how Mr. B said that your office was the old janitor's closet but that he would get you a bigger office once the budget for the next fiscal year was approved?   Remember Mr. B opened the door and you saw a chair and a single light bulb hanging from the ceiling, but you didn't care because you finally had your own office and would now finally get the respect you craved?  Remember how there was a small 3 inch by 3 inch sliding window located in the door about three feet above the ground?  Remember when you asked why that was there and Mr. B replied that it was your mail slot and not to worry about it?  Remember when Mr. B suggested you walk into your new office and then you happily did?  Remember how Mr. B then shut the door behind you and locked you in?  Remember when you said, "ha ha, real funny, Chief?"  Remember when you heard the sliding window in the door open and then you saw that Mr. B unzipped his pants and dropped them to the ground and then pressed his bare ass against the hole in the door before ripping a 10-second long wet fart?  Remember how bad it smelled?  Remember how there were no windows or vents in your new office and Mr. B slid the window closed after ripping his repugnant fart?  Remember when how you begged Mr. B to let you out and you could hear him laughing and hi-fiving some Bayside students who saw what he had done?  Remember how the sliding window then opened again and you assumed that Mr. Belding was giving you some fresh air to breathe?  Remember how concerned you became when Mr. Belding inserted his massive penis into the hole and then pissed all over you?  Remember how for the next four days Mr. B and numerous Bayside students repeatedly farted, pissed, and shit on you as you remained locked in your new office?  You sure learned not to criticize Mr. Belding's eating habits that time!!!

Former WWF Wrestler Marty Jannetty's Fart Pranks

"The Rockers" was a popular WWF tag team from the late 1980s. One of the members was Marty Jannetty. Jannetty was apparently notorious for pranking other wrestlers and random people often by ripping heinous farts.

Here is a nice video clip of an interview with Al Snow, a wrestler who used to wrestle on a tag team with Jannetty.  At 2:17 in this interview, Snow said:

"[He] ate Icopro amino tablets which that been left in his garage for  years and had like [a] kind of brown edge on them and gave him horrific gas and the only reason he ate them is because they gave him horrific gas so that he would fart on the plane and bother people.  I remember when we were in San Antonio in Texas and they had this little closet of a room where they were having the agent meeting.  And he's like, 'watch this' ... 'um, ok' and he gets this big smile on his face and then walks in the agent room and then nothing...nothing and then all of a sudden the door opens and then he walks out laughing and shuts the door.  He says, 'stand right here.'  I don't move ... about 30 seconds later ... 'JESUS CHRIST!!!' and they all came piling out of there because he had went in and busted ass and didn't tell anybody and then shut the door again and left them sealed in that little small coffin of a room with him shitting his pants.  Who does that?  All the time!  24 hours a day, 7 days a week!"

Jannetty would have been a great addition to Saved By The Bell: The New Class. It would have been fantastic if he had played a substitute teacher who pranked Screech by ripping nasty farts in his face!

Negative Forum Comments About Dustin Diamond

I recently discovered these negative comments about Dustin Diamond from another forum. Some of these are quite funny and illustrate that he's always been an annoying dork notwithstanding his status as an icon among mentally-deranged homosexuals who love him!

"I love SBTB - I watch it everyday. I'll be curious to see what Screech says about the behind-the-scenes stories about the cast members. That said, Dustin Diamond has shown his true colors these last few years. He's just a desperate, money-starved, washed-up actor that is looking for attention. I'll be taking his memoir with a grain of salt and not believe everything in print."

"He used know him from back in my band days. He was the singer of a shitty band called Much! First time I met him he was hitting a 4 foot bong. He liked his shrooms back then too. This was back in 1992. He was a dorky ass with a huge head even back then.  
...
He was such a moron that after hanging out with him 15 minutes, groupies even wouldnt want to hang around him. If he is claiming he banged some fellow cast members, he is full of shit. He was a joke."

"I so agree! He's on my list of celebs who should just die and go away along with Andy Dick. Back in 1999 when I worked at Disneyland a Guest Servicies person who was assigned to Dustin for the day while at the park said he was a total ahole and full of himself. "

"Dustin is such a creepy, scum sucking bottom feeder !! I wouldn't read this book if you gave it to me gratis !! He has shown what a flaming asshole he is to the entire world !"

"Ugh, he's just like herpes. Can't someone run him over and be done with it?? Perhaps he and Corey Feldman can take a Thelma and Louise-like ride to the closest cliff."

"that dude is a creepy crying sack of doo doo.. dustin the douche diamond needs to grow up.. celebrity fit clubbed annoyed the crap out of me for bringing him back after all the crap.."

"Ugh. Dustin Diamond is an ugly disgusting ass."

"Diamond probably eats feces too..."

"He is extremely annoying. And that is a compliment. He had an ensemble part on a very popular Saturday morning TV show 15 or so years ago. So what. He needs to go away, the faster the better."

"He is such a douchebag, which is a shame cuz I used to like Screech and Saved By The Bell...I still like that show, but he's such a disgusting freak now...and so washed up."

"Another act of desperation from another has been that nobody could give two shits about. Let's see....sex tape, Celebrity Fit Club, fighting the dude who played Horshack on Welcome Back Kotter. Seriously, this guy just needs to disappear. " 

"What are your thoughts on this loser?"

"I'm surprised he isn't dead yet..."

"I've never liked him. Even as Screech on Saved By The Bell. Screech always screwed things up. I don't like people like that."

"I have seen him on Celebrity Fit Club and he was an ass on there, and the sad part is I don't think he was acting."

"He was always annoying on the show. Then later I saw him on a "Where Are They Now" type program and he was doing stand up comedy (not very well I might add) and was selling t-shirts to try to save his house and wanted people to donate money. Yeah right - the economy is in the toliet but let me help someone who squandered his money. He's a douchebag."

"I believe in another interview I saw they used an old cast picture for this People cover and he was quite pissed off because he was Photoshopped out" 

"He grosses me out." 

"I watched him on Celebrity Fit Club and couldn't believe how rude he was to his castmates and the judges. I so wanted the drill sargeant to kick his snotty ass. If anyone deserves to have their ass handed to him it is Dustin Diamond"

"I loved the show but Screech -didn't care too much for him. Now all grown up, it's even worse, lol"

"He needs to take the short bus to Duchetonia with Jon Gosselin. he thinks he's so cool and funny with the whole Dirty Sanchez thing when he makes himslef look even more like a moron. God he sucks!"

"I had seen somewhere that he was doing some sex related show somewhere and claimed he had "4 feet of Screech in my pants." His words, not mine. Prolly more like 4 centimeters. Sorry, it must be Thursday, excuse me while I get my sarcasm warmed up."

"There was an episode of Law and Order or one of the spin offs where they knocked off a washed up has been annoying as hell child star an awful lot like Dustin Diamond. That made me very much happy "

"Looks better without him on there...can't stand Dustin the Prick Diamond!"

"He's a complete freakazoid LOSER!"

"He is a total freakin' loser.What an asshole." 

"He's a shitload of other things too."

"heres another pic from the People story

 And again, that picture looks great WITHOUT the douchebag."

Diamond Pulled a Knife on Spankee Rogers, His Saved By The Bell: The New Class Co-Star in the mid-1990s

Dustin Diamond infamously went to prison in 2016 for stabbing a man at a Port Washington, WI bar.  However, this was apparently not the first incident where Diamond used a knife against someone else in an aggressive manner.  A defunct website called "The Wave" published the following article back around 2004 in which Diamond admitted he pulled a butterfly knife on Spankee Rogers, his Saved By The Bell: The New Class co-star, back in the mid-1990s:

Saved by the Bass

Dustin Diamond screeches into the mic.

By Scott DeVaney

---

Note: the following interview was not conducted under standard conditions because the interviewer, me, has a personal history with the interview subject, Dustin Diamond, a.k.a. Screech. To make a very long story short, in the early ‘90s I worked as a production assistant on Saved by the Bell: The New Class. You remember the series – it was the one where the classic geek character, Screech, comes back to his old high school to work as the principal’s assistant. Hijinks and deep moral lessons ensue, naturally. (Another note: I could literally fill an entire tell-all novel with my experiences on Saved by the Bell. Rest assured that it was the single most insane environment I have ever witnessed – a fantastic Tinseltown tale replete with child actor egos, drugs, money, sex and a producer who believes Jesus talks to him. Totally serious. ) 

However, since I only worked on the show for about nine months and was the showbiz equivalent of a water boy, Diamond had no recollection of me. I chose not to reveal our shared history until the end of the interview, because I wanted to get his candid response to a situation that occurred on the set of Saved by the Bell involving a fight Diamond had with fellow cast member, Spankee Rogers. To the best of my memory, Diamond pulled out a butterfly knife during the verbal skirmish with Spankee, but never attempted to strike his co-star with it. Now, take a moment to try to picture Screech threatening someone with a brass butterfly knife… Yes, it was as surreal and awesome as you can imagine. As you will soon learn, Mr. Diamond has a very different recollection of the altercation. Additionally, we’re forced by the laws of Hollywood to talk about his “music” career. In case I forgot to mention it earlier, Diamond now plays bass in the band Salty the Pocketknife (how ironic). They try to sound like Mr. Bungle meets Frank Zappa.

The Wave: If you were going to kill yourself, how would you do it?
Dustin Diamond: Hard to say. If I ever went, I’d want to go peacefully in my sleep. I don’t know. I wouldn’t want to plan my own death.

TW: Have you received any advice from Dennis Quaid or Bruce Willis on how to manage an acting and music career?
DD: No, no. In fact, I think what’s funny is that because this music isn’t Top 40 music, we really stand out from anyone that’s ever juggled both. And I’ve been in music longer than I’ve been in acting.

TW: How would you describe your band’s sound?
DD: Odd time, eclectic, it’s musician’s music. It’s stuff that people who know music can really appreciate. It’s not your cookie cutter, standard, predictable stuff.

TW: What are Salty the Pocketknife groupies like?
DD: Hard to say. On the outside, some of them look like people you’d see every day on the street. Some of them are really wacky and crazy looking, really individualistic and yet, when you talk to the people, usually they’re just laid back, normal, cool people.

TW: Do you have any awesome rockstar drug problems?
DD: No, no yet. But I’m young. Give me time. But seriously, that’s one of the things that’s funny – all these child stars grow up and they’re knockin’ over banks and they’re getting prostitutes and stuff – I’m, like, one of the only people I know that has managed to dodge all of that negative crap.

TW: Did you make enough cash on Saved by the Bell to be set for life?
DD: I don’t think you can ever make enough to be set for life. Well, I guess there are limits. In the billions, I guess. But instead of hording it, come up with something really creative to do with it, you know? Make a mark.

TW: The scope of your fame is quite astonishing. I was in Peru this past summer in a remote town and even a group of 12-year-old Peruvian girls knew who Screech was. Are you amazed, or even aware of, the global notoriety you have?
DD: Yeah, I’ve gotten letters from all over the world – Burma, Bangladesh, the Serengeti – it’s amazing the show had such an impact like that. It’s a testimony to the phenom that it was.

TW: What’s your favorite weapon?
DD: Favorite weapon? The sword was a very elegant weapon in the days of the samurai. You had honor and chivalry much like the knights, and yet even though it was a gruesome and horrific weapon, unlike guns, you didn’t have drive-bys and you couldn’t just pick one up and point it at someone, you actually had to have skill to take someone’s life. I think there were a lot fewer random deaths with swords. I could be wrong. I have no idea. But it just seems that way.

TW: Does Mario Lopez wear an excessive amount of tank tops in real life?
DD: No, but… I don’t know who’s worse with little boys, Mario or Michael Jackson.

TW: Wow, that’s a loaded statement. Anyway, you know, our paths have briefly crossed. I was a P.A. on Saved by the Bell: The New Class for a few episodes.
DD: Really?

TW: Really. I remember this one day when you got into a fight with Spankee Rogers. Do you remember that?
DD: Yeah.

TW: And you pulled out a butterfly knife and Spankee started saying, “Come on, bitch. Go ahead and cut me!”
DD: No, I didn’t pull a knife on him. I used to carry one of those Leatherman tools with the pliers and screwdrivers. Because I’m a bass player, it’s like my tech weapon, my need all/be all tool, and the thing was, he was just being annoying and hood-like. He was struttin’ around talking about —

TW: You guys almost got into it. You were saying, “Dude, I could have you fired!”
DD: The guy is so unappreciative. He comes riding in on a show that I was a part of and that I helped build, talking about how life sucks and everything else and I’m like, “Dude, you’re making thousands a week. Life sucks? What are you talking about?” So, what happened was, I told him off and he came around the corner and I had taken my knife out and was cutting up a piece of rope that I had spied and needed to use for some odd… I don’t know, I was always doing something, you know, to keep myself occupied. I was cutting a piece of rope and he comes around the corner when I turned around and he goes, “Oh, got a knife, huh? I suppose you think you’re tough.” He just started going off for the wrong reasons. I didn’t pull a knife on him. I mean, come on. The guy is four-foot-seven… Let’s put it this way, it’s the same as people out there who send you fan mail and get together with you – especially, there are a lot of girls that will do this, who try to hook up with you – then try to have your kid because they figure they’re going to get all this money from you, or there’s people that figure if they hang out with you, all of a sudden they’re going to be successes. I’ve had two or three stalkers in my life.

TW: Any good stories?
DD: There’s this one girl who follows me around to clubs in my stand-up career. I remember coming out of a club one day and this girl came up and told me she wanted to hang out and everything. She was real glassy-eyed, almost like she was on something, but she wasn’t. She was bluntly hitting on me. She later showed up to my hotel and started pounding on my door saying, “I know you’re in there, I know what you’re doing.” She slipped her number under the door. In the morning, I found a note saying, “You didn’t call me. You can’t treat people like this.” And I’m like, dude, I don’t even know this girl. A couple of weeks later she showed up at a show and I didn’t know if she had a gun or something. I come out of the club and she’s standing in the rain, just soaking wet like something out of a movie. She crosses the street breathing really heavy, gritting her teeth, just staring at me. She’s shown up to other gigs. Sometimes she’ll be nice, other times she’ll be crazy. I haven’t seen her in a while. It’s been a couple of years, but that doesn’t mean she’s gone. I’m hoping she’s found someone else to latch on to.

TW: Maybe she’s moved on to Urkel.
DD: I can only hope.

Video About Max Goldberg's YTMND Website

The gay community owes Max Goldberg a debt of gratitude for creating Dustindiamond.com so that Diamond's queer fans had a place to read hot queer fantasies about Dustin Diamond.  Goldberg later went on the create YTMND.com, which was a very popular website around 2004-2005 or so.

Here is a video I discovered regarding the rise and fall of YTMND.com.  My very first Dustindiamond.com posts is mentioned at 4:39!

"Screech Takes Center Stage" "Remember When" Gay Fantasy

I recently discovered this spank-tastic queer fantasy which was posted in a sub-reddit for gay fans of Dustin Diamond!  The title of this fantasy is "Screech Takes Center Stage":

Screech, remember when you you were filming the last show of Saved by the Bell's 20th season? Remember how the script said you would be on camera at all times? Remember how you thought this was going to be the episode that finally made you a household name? Remember how it was set entirely in the hallway at Bayside? Remember how the first two lines were for a couple of extras who walked up to you and said to each other, "I can't wait for the pep rally" and "Let me borrow your bio notes" and then one of them ripped a fart in your face? Remember how you said "Zoinks!" Remember how Zack entered followed by Slater and the audience cheered? Remember how Slater was wolfing down burritos from the cafeteria? Remember how Zack started pissing on your shoes while saying "Slater, wait until you hear about my new scheme to make a bunch of money." Remember how you thought it was weird for him to piss on your shoes? Remember how Slater then walked in front of you and said "I'd like to see you try preppy" while bending over and ripping powerful burrito farts that blew Zack's piss into your face and jewfro? Remember how you said "Double zoinks!"  

Remember how they kept doing this while Kelly and Jessie came in and Kelly said "I hate Valley" while spraying period blood into your jewfro and Jessie said "I hate polluters" while queefing into your face? Remember how you said "Quadruple zoinks!"  

Remember how after they left, the script called for you to say "Zoinks!" at random intervals, which you did? Remember how after a while Mr. Belding entered and said "Hey hey hey, what is going on here?" even though no one was around but him and you? Remember how he pulled down his pants and bent over in front of you? Remember when just at that moment, Corky crashed through the set in the driver's ed car, knocking your face into Mr. Belding's buttcrack where he ripped a loud fart that could be heard clearly despite being muffled by your poofy jewfro? Remember how the audience all stood up and cheered and Corky, Zack, Slater, Kelly, Jessie and Mr. B all gathered at the front of the set and took a bow? Remember how none of the farts or queefs were actually in the script because the writers had stopped even watching the show and had been phoning it in so that the show would get cancelled? Remember how it didn't matter because everybody had become masters of improvisation and the show got renewed for a 21st season? You sure got screwed that time!

Old Archived entry on TVWiki.tv for Dustin Diamond

I recently discovered an old archived entry on TVWiki.tv for Dustin Diamond.  TVWiki.tv is an apparently defunct website, although it was an alternative to Wikipedia at one point.  There is quite a bit of information in this entry which is omitted from the corresponding Wikipedia entry for Dustin Diamond, including many of Diamond's "lost" tv and movie roles:

Dustin Diamond

The Television & Movie Wiki: for TV, celebrities, and movies.

Dustin Neil Diamond (born January 7, 1977 in San Jose, California), is an American actor who gained fame during the 1990s as Screech Powers, an annoying and nerdy openly gay character in the popular sitcom, Saved by the Bell.

Contents 1 Early Life 2 Screech and Saved by the Bell 3 Appearances After Saved by the Bell 4 DustinDiamond.com and Other Websites 5 Salty the Pocketknife 6 Personal Life 7 Filmography 8 External link

Early Life

Diamond attended Zion Lutheran School in Anaheim. His first job involved working as a male prostitute at a Los Angeles-area highway rest stop. He later auditioned for the lead role in cult classic Cool As Ice, but was rejected because he was too young at the time, and was limited to appearing in only one bathroom scene and some other scenes that were cut from the movie anyway. He also appeared briefly in Big Top Pee-wee as well. Dustin later claimed that Pee-Wee had ripped an enormous fart in his face during the filming of this movie and from that moment on he was flaming gay.

Screech and Saved by the Bell

Of course, his most pivotal role, and that which would become irreversably tied to his image, was the role of Samuel "Screech" Powers on Saved by the Bell, a role he played for close to thirteen years, from its beginning as Good Morning, Miss Bliss, to its ultimate incarnation as Saved by the Bell: The New Class. It could be argued that, with the possible exception of Mr. Belding, no one character is as closely identified with the show as Screech.

He was originally supposed to have an extremely high pitched, almost squealing voice, but instead it was decided that the character would possess a quirky, although not so over the top tone instead. The show originally aired on The Disney Channel under the Miss Bliss title (now referred to as Saved By the Bell: The Junior High Years), featuring Hayley Mills in the titular role. After a year, the show was brought over to NBC and repackaged into its more well-known incarnation. Of all the show's characters, only Screech, Zack Morris, Lisa Turtle, and Mr. Belding made the jump from JFK Junior High in Indiana, to Bayside High in Palisades, California, although the incredibly abrupt change in venue was never acknowledged, much less explained.

Screech was more often than not a pivotal figure in the schemes and pranks of the Bayside gang, from pretending to be an alien (which almost resulted in his dissection at the hands of the government), to getting kidnapped and viciously ass-raped by rival high school Valley in the ongoing inter-school "Prank War", to dating best friend Zack Morris' father, and in one instance even winning the "Miss Gay Bayside" Pageant, in spite of an impressive drum solo performed by A.C. Slater. His parents, who were extremely obsessed with all things Elvis-related, were never seen, aside from one episode where his mother leaves him in charge of the house as his parents went on a vacation to Graceland, which naturally led to an episode spanning dilemma involving a broken Elvis statue and a torn butthole.

In the episodes his robot Kevin is also occasionally shown, and he himself makes numerous references to his insect, animal, and gay porn collections. He has also been shown dressing up as (and flamboyantly parading about like) Liberace, impersonating Zack on numerous occasions, and stereotypically portraying a Native American for Zack's school project. He claims to be descended from the "Gay Italian lover and spy", Luigi Powerelli, making it clear that he is part greasy Italian.
In the final episode of the first season, he willingly relinquishes his anal virginity to AC Slater, knowing how much it meant to him.

Continuing the series into college, Saved by the Bell: The College Years again inexplicably shows most of the cast transplanted into not only the same college, but also the same college dorm. The most notable of Screech's actions in this series involve him stealing a canister of farts from the chemistry lab, in order to gain acceptance from other students attending a rave, after Slater belittles him about being a faggot-ass screwup. In another episode, Zack walked in on Screech servicing the penis and ass needs of his dorm's RA, Mr. Rogers. For a brief time Screech moved into Mr. Rogers room, where the enormous ex-NFL player never wore pants, crapped on the floor, and butt-slammed Screech many times daily!

After the end of that series, he quickly returned to Bayside High as Mr. Belding's assistant in The New Class episodes, remaining with the show until its cancellation. Several storyline arcs from The New Class episodes centered around a growing homosexual relationship between Screech and Mr. Belding. In one of the later episodes of The New Class, Mr. Belding catches Screech staring at him while he is taking a piss at a urinal. Other storyline arcs centered around Screech's burgeoning form of adult-onset Down's Syndrome.

Appearances After Saved by the Bell

Diamond has kept busy professionally since the popular teenager sitcom was cancelled: He has been featured on a number of TV shows, including The Weakest Link, and has participated in a celebrity boxing contest, professional wrestling matches, and has participated in several gay pornos. He also has released a video, entitled Dustin Diamond Teaches Chess, where he shows various techniques for becoming a huge homo and a better chess player.

Diamond made several guest appearances on Life Goes On, where he portrayed a young man with Down's Syndrome who is coming to grips with his homosexual desires. In the episodes he is the gay lover of the star, Corky. His character contracts HIV after sucking off Corky and several other dudes in a men's room at a highway rest stop in a scene that Diamond ad-libbed.

Diamond made a notable cameo appearance as himself in the movie Made, where Vince Vaughn's character incredulously questions a doorman at a club as to why "Screech" was allowed into the venue while he was not. He also appeared in Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star as himself as well. He is only shown in a few scenes - Dickie is hanging out with a bunch of former child stars in a apartment and Dickie's sitcom rehearsal. In one notable scene, Dickie Roberts and Barry Williams give Diamond a golden shower.

His appearance on The Opie and Anthony Show is generally considered to have contributed to one of the worst episodes of that show ever.

Diamond appeared as himself in a commercial for Trivial Pursuit 90's edition.

DustinDiamond.com and Other Websites

In 2003, Diamond alienated his gay fanbase by filing a lawsuit for ownership of http://www.DustinDiamond.com, a parody website owned by Max Goldberg which largely promoted the idea that Screech Powers was the constant victim of homosexual rape by any and all other characters. He lost that case, although the website has apparently shut down nonetheless, as a result of its forums being overloaded with spam bots, as well as Goldbergs new concentration placed towards his then-upcoming site, You're The Man Now Dog
 
Other sites have popped up since the verdict, including DustinDiamondLove, a forum site formed in 2005 by Maxwell Nerdstrom (unrelated to Goldberg), and Gayporn.org. These new sites largely features the same content.

Salty the Pocketknife

Diamond is currently a stand-up comedian and gay porn star. At one time he was the bass player in the band Salty The Pocketknife. However, harassment perpetrated by DustinDiamond.com contributors led to the closing of the band's forum section on their website, and at some time afterward the website was hacked by a group calling itself "The Iranian Black Hat", and has not as yet been repaired. There have also been documented cases of band members being harassed on AOL Instant Messenger as well, with references to Screech invariably making their way into the conversations. The future of the band is unknown.

Currently Diamond is being sued by Salty the Pocketknife's former label. Diamond, 39, who lives in Milwaukee, is being sued in Montgomery County Court by Ambler music producer/distributor Sonance Entertainment. The claim: Diamond - bassist in a band called Salty the Pocketknife - did nothing to promote the band's CD and left Sonance on the hook for CDs. Among the choice cuts are such homo-erotic classics as "Rim Goblin," "Red Panties 145," "Magic Garbage Ride," "Gloryhole Blues" and the burning track "Pour No Gasoline."

Sonance, headed by Rick Frimmer and represented in court by Lawrence Pauker of Norristown, seeks in excess of $200,000.

The suit says Sonance arranged a promotional trip to New York, but Diamond "failed to wake up for scheduled radio interviews, complained about his picture not being on a billboard in Times Square, and spent almost a full afternoon auditioning for a television part that had nothing to do with the Salty CD." The suit also alleges that although Diamond had promised to promote the CD on Jay Leno's and Howard Stern's shows, he never reached out to Leno's people and Stern's crew turned him down.

Daniel W. McCartney of Norristown, representing Diamond, said Diamond "is gayer than AIDS."

Personal Life

While working on Saved by the Bell, members of the cast regularly dated each other. Diamond, who was considerably younger than the rest of the cast, was not a part of this, although he has claimed to have dated Dennis Haskins and many of the show's extras. He was also said to have had a relationship of some sort with Full House's John Stamos.

In the mid-1990s, Diamond was romantically involved with Down's Syndrome actor Chris Burke, then-MTV VJ Kurt Loder, and HIV+ comedian JM J Bullock.

One of his best childhood friends was fellow actor Jeremy Miller, who starred on Growing Pains.
In his book "Behind the Bell" Diamond discusses the embarrassment he faced when his co-stars found out that at the age of 17 he still wore diapers.

He has plans to write a book about his experience growing up as a child actor. Rumors have circulated that he is the brother of Beastie Boy Michael Diamond, aka Mike D, as well as that he is the son of singer Neil Diamond, both of which are true. Oddly enough, his adoptive father, Mark Diamond did in fact make an appearance in a Saved by the Bell episode, where he played a science teacher who threatened to "...experiment with their grades" and have sex with Screech.

Dustin operates a charity known as the Dustin Diamond Foundation, which supports organizations which specialize in child care. This foundation was created after the miscarriage of his first child.
Diamond currently resides in southeastern Wisconsin with his wife Jennifer, where stories of his harassment by Screech "fans" persist. Screech "fans" have reportedly shit in his mailbox, slashed his tires, and pissed on his house.

The "Blue Oyster," a bar in southeastern Wisconsin, offers a popular mixed drink called the "Screech teabag" which includes 4 shots of vodka, a shot of piss, a dash of semen, and cherry Hi-C.

In December 2014 Diamond was arrested for stabbing another man at a bar in Port Washington, WI. According to reports, Diamond tried to pull the balls out of the man's pants while they were both waiting for a drink at the bar. When the other man asked him to stop, Diamond became irate and stabbed him with a pocket knife. Diamond then sniffed the man's ass crack before leaving the bar.

In 2015 Diamond was found guilty of of sniffing the man's ass, and was sentenced to four months in jail. After a pathetic ruse of an appeal, a penniless Diamond was forced to give up and will report to jail on January 15th, 2016. It is expected he will be welcomed with many hot carls, a few diarrhea sprays, and some nasty farts to his face. Public officials hope that Diamond does not infect the jails population with Down's Syndrome, or the SuperAids which Diamond is known to carry.

Filmography

1. "Gay Waterboy" (2015)... Guy getting pissed on in Locker-room
2. Queer Bait #5 (2010)... Dusty
3. Assblasters #78 (2009)... Raging queer
4. Shaved By The Balls (2008)... Hairless crotch guy
5. Screeched (2006)... Gay dude
6. Bug Chasers (2005)... Mitch Cumstein
7. Hook Nosed Queers (2005)... Dude receiving a Hot Karl
8. 13th Grade (2004)... Corey
9. Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star (2003)... Himself
10. The Masturbater (2003)... Spanky Diamond
11. From Justin to Kelly (2003)... Dork at beach
12. Big Fat Liar (2002)... Wolf Party Guest
13. Jane White Is Sick & Twisted (2002)... Simone
14. Anal Cum Buckets (2002)... Jizz Bucket #2
15. Rest Stop (2002)... Gay bathroom attendant
16. The Zoo (2002)... weirdo sucking off gorilla
17. Made (2001)... Himself
18. Diarrhea Sprays #4 (2001)... Ass rimmer in scene #3
19. HIV+ (documentary) (2001)... Himself
20. Mr. Horton (2001)... Dudley
21. Longshot (2000)... Waiter
22. Billy Elliot (2000)... Pedophile
23. Life Sentence (1999)... Prison Bitch
24. Gay Gloryhole 5 (1999)... Dustin Jewberg
25. The Talented Mr. Ripley (1999)... Anal rape victim
26. Chairman of the Board (1998)... Man tossing Carrot Top's salad
27. Highway Robbery (1998) (TV movie)... The Booty Burglar
28. The Birdcage (1996)... Exotic dancer
29. Leprechaun 3 (1995)... Rim Goblin
30. Houseguest (1995)... Kid in bathroom listening to Sinbad taking a dump
31. Santa With Muscles (1995)... Gay kid
32. Saved by the Bell: The New Class (1993) (TV series)... Samuel "Screech" Powers (1994-2000)
33. Screech on Life (1994) (TV series)... Samuel "Screech" Powers
34. Pulp Fiction (1994)... "the Gimp"
35. Saved by the Bell: Wedding in Las Vegas (1994) (TV)... Samuel "Screech" Powers
36. Teen Wolf 4: Stiles in Action (1994).... Guy eating cheese
37. Saved by the Bell: The College Years (1993) (TV series)... Samuel "Screech" Powers
38. Robocop 3 (1993)... Gay robot
39. Rising Sun (1993)... annoying waiter at party
40. Taken from Behind (1992)... Kurt Steinberg
41. Basic Instinct (1992)... Dude with genital warts
42. Saved by the Bell: Hawaiian Style (1992) (TV)... Samuel "Screech" Powers
43. Cool As Ice (1991) ... Gay kid watching Vanilla Ice take a piss
44. No Holds Barred (1989) ... Kid eating out Hulk Hogan's ass
45. Saved by the Bell (1989) (TV series)... Samuel "Screech" Powers
46. Life Goes On (1989) (TV series)... Corky
47. She's Out of Control (1989)... Kid on the Beach
48. Big Top Pee-wee (1988)... Child - Deke
49. Purple People Eater (1988)... Big Z
50. Good Morning, Miss Bliss (a.k.a. Saved by the Bell: The Junior High Years (1987) (TV series)... Samuel "Screech" Powers
51. Speaker of the Mouse (1988)... Thaddeus Maximus, Jr.
52. Charles In Charge (1988)....Charles "Nut Buddy"
53. The Price of Life (1987)... Young Stiles
54. C.H.U.D. (1984)... C.H.U.D. #3
55. Police Academy (1984)... Annoying kid at the Blue Oyster gay bar

External link

• Dustin Diamond Love-A forum site dedicated to homosexual fantasies concerning Screech and other members of Saved By the Bell, formed shortly before the closing of DustinDiamond.com.
• trustthedust.com
• Review of Dustin Diamond's band, Salty The Pocketknife
• Audio interview with Dustin Diamond: Wednesday, 25 May 2005
• Dustin Diamond at the Internet Movie Database
• Article about Dustin Diamond's unsuccessful attempt to shut down dustindiamond.com
• Court Decision- Dustin N. Diamond vs. Max Goldberg decision (pdf)
• NNDB profile
• Amiannoying.com Profile
• The Dustin Diamond Foundation