Diamond Admits That the Screech and Mr. Belding Characters Were Gay!!!

Dustin Diamond's "Behind the Bell" autobiography/expose on his Saved By The Bell experiences hit store shelves in September 2009 and has been universally panned. I have not yet read the book myself, although I did read a recent review of the book in the Onion's AV Club. According to the Onion AV Club article, Diamond admits that his character Screech had a gay relationship with Mr. Belding, as Diamond's queer fans have suspected for years!

The article recites:

Diamond writes about how he suspected that the writers of The New Class deliberately tried to undermine him and co-star Mr. Belding (he has a name, yes, but neither you nor I should ever invoke it) by making their relationship not so much homoerotic as explicitly homosexual. According to Diamond, they’d write stage directions where Screech and Mr. Belding gaze into each other’s eyes and soulfully embrace. If Diamond is being truthful—I assume everything he says is at the very least a big exaggeration—then that is officially the most awesome shit ever. Rock on, subversive, anonymous Saved By The Bell: The New Class scribes.

Picture of Rick Bawls' "Mother"

It is well-established that my obsessive Internet stalker, a Toronto resident who calls himself "Rick Bawls," is a raging homosexual who apparently masturbates several times away while thinking about me. It is also known that Rick Bawls is the son of notorious necrophiliac serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer. However, not much was known about his mother until recently.

New information has been brought to my attention about Rick's "mother." Apparently Rick's father anally deposited his unusually potent seed into the colon of a cross-dressing man known only as "Jizelle." A recent picture of Jizelle is shown below. I heard that Rick Bawls' fetus grew within Jizelle's rectum until one day when Jizelle thought he was taking a massive dump only to look down into the toilet and see the baby Rick Bawls looking back at him!

Video Clip of Rick Bawls Getting Knocked Out

Rick Bawls started a riot in Toronto last week after the closing of his favorite rest stop and then traveled to Vancouver to participate in the Vancouver riot this week! Rick is seen in this video hitting an overturned car over and over with a metal club. Rick is the one with the black hair wearing the long-sleeve blue shirt and the plaid newsboy cap.

Rick Bawls walked away for a little bit when the Good Samaritan in the black Adidas jacket ("the Adidas guy") showed up and told him to stop. However, Rick returned and attempted to light the car on fire, enraging the Adidas guy. Rick finally turned to leave after the Adidas guy threw a haymaker at Rick but missed. Rick had a disgusted look on his face as he walked away and was clocked on the side of his head by another guy. Rick apparently has a glass jaw, because he immediately crumpled to the ground. Rick totally deserved what happened to him in this video - maybe next time he'll think twice before participating in a riot! I have it on good authority that Rick woke up 45 minutes later in a gas station bathroom covered in shit and semen and his blue shirt was soaked with piss!

Riot in Toronto After Rest Stop Closure

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More Spankworthy "Remember When" Posts From The Dustin Diamond Love Forum

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More Classic "Remember When..." Gay Fantasies

I recently discovered these old "Remember when..." gay fantasies that had been originally posted in the now-defunct Dustindiamond.com guestbook:

25th July 2005 - 10:27:56 AM
59411 : RememberWhen
Hey, remember how your acting was likened to a piece of wood? Remember how you got pissed off and sent a piece of wood dressed up to look like you for one episode? Remember how it became a super-duper Acting movie star? Remember how you angry you got when it implicated you in homosexual relations with Mr Belding? Remember how the newspaper screamed "SCREECH GETS WOOD!" in its headline? Remember how you were chased by an angry mob down the street with piece of wood in thow? Remember how you finally escaped to Canada to do your "comedy" routine? Remember how the crowd got angry when you didn't produce wood? Remember how you got annoyed and pulled out your dick to the amusement of the crowd? Remember how your schlong got more laughs than any of your jokes? Remember how you cursed your career on that piece of wood and tried to sit on it to break it? Remember how you sat on it all wrong and it ended up half way up your rectum? You sure got wood that time Screech!



13th July 2005 - 11:58:32 AM
47721 : RememberWhen
Remember when you first watched Porky's and you saw that kid stick his meat in the shower hole? Remember how you thought it'd be a good idea to do so that you could lay a girl? Remember how you got lost in the backrooms of the school and stuck your dick in to a hole what you thought lead to the girls shower room? Remember how your dick filled something tight and squishy? Remember how good it felt? Remember how you pulled your schlong out and saw it covered in diaorrea? Remember how you looked through the hole and saw Max Nerdstorm wiping his fart-licious butthole and when he saw you he dumped his ass-load into your face? Remember how you ran out into the overweight class and the fat kids thought you had chocolate on your face? Remember how the fat kids all jumped on you and eat your face, biting it? Remember how one fat kid bit your schlong? Remember how they began to to do the 'truffle shuffle' and you got turned on and jizzed all over one fat kid's face? Remember how the kids parents bitchslapped you?



13th July 2005 - 10:56:05 AM
47720 : RememberWhen
Remember when the school returned from France & Belding got the crazzzy idea of putting everybody in French uniforms? Remember how he used to look down Kelly's shirt and peek under the desk when Lisa was in his class? Remember how you wish it was you with the skirt and your shirt Belding was peeking down? Remember how you got your way with him when you pretended your penis was on fire? Remember how he sent you to Slater's class? Remember how tight Slater's muscly ass was in that uniform? Remember that 7-minute long pre-recorded "WOOO!" track that saluted his ass whenever he bended over? Remember how you 'accidentally' slipped inside? Remember how you dumped your fluid into his ass? Remember how Slater was a wannabe Steven Seagal & broke your legs, arms and cock? Remember how you ran into the schools governors office and cried like a baby? Remember how shocked they were when you creamed all over their faces? You sure got expelled that time zubaz!



11th July 2005 - 04:40:34 PM
46219 : RememberWhen
Remember when you Jessie asked you to "poker" you thought meant she meant "poke her"? Remember how you poked her, despite her crying she hated "males, the pigs"? Remember how later on that year the feminist became a cheerleader? WTF was all that about? Remember how Slater found out and drafted you into the school wrestling team? Remember they put that stupid helmet on your head? Remember how you got all excited at the prospect of rubbing your dick against Slater's inner thigh whilst wrestling together on the sweaty mat? Remember how you thought "this must be what WWF wrestling must be like" and you went on to become a lazy, drunk wrestler? Remember how in the match Slater threw you to the ground, breaking 2 of your ribs and broke your leg in 3 places? Remember how you ended up black and blue? Remember how Slater tossed you off & threw you in the college football locker where every jock creamed you in the face? You sure got dressed up as a slut and got dumbfucked that time you deadbeat of asswipe!



11th July 2005 - 07:03:42 AM
45639 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember how you guys watched Animal House? Remember how you turned up in a toga the next day yelling "Toga, Toga... 2000!"? Remember how everybody tried really, really hard not to laugh at your scrawny chicken legs? Remember how Zack yanked down your toga and you ran off blushing profousily? Remember how you ran into that punk girl Tori? Remember how firm her abs were and how prominent her adam's apple was? Remember how she stuffed her dick down your throat until you wined like the weiner you are? Remember how Belding caught Tori in the act and got her suspended? Remember how Belding took you to the nurse's room and proceded to buttfuck your ass with his schlong? Remember how you he kept calling you his "screechy boy"? Remember how he dumped his load? Remember how your anus burnt for ages? Remember you got worried that the burning sensation in your ass made you think you'd get pregnant? Remember how you didn't? You sure got fucked over that time, loser!



11th July 2005 - 06:57:30 AM
45638 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember when you stuck your dick into a yummy warm tortilla? Oh wait, I meant Slater's ass?!



07th July 2005 - 10:36:23 AM
42339 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember how Santa came down your chimney? By chimney I mean throat, and by Santa I mean Belding.

Remember how KITT used to do turbo boosts over dykes - and by dykes I mean Zack, by KITT I mean slater, and by turbo boosts over I mean dumping his load into...

Remember how the tooth fairy used to give you $ for teeth? By the tooth fairy I mean Belding and by teeth I mean unprotected anal sex? Remember how he never paid you?

Remember how the air force wanted to take you away for being an alien? By take you away I mean probe you deeply, by alien I mean a sick sob.

Remember how Lisa got drunk and crashed her mercades? by crashed her mecades I mean got pregnant by Zack...

Remember how you used to have sex with goats?



07th July 2005 - 10:30:46 AM
42338 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember how you got diareria from eatting Zack's mom's home-made apple pie? Remember how you shat all over her kitchen floor, splashing her with your mucas? Remember how she had to take a shower? Remember how you caught a glimpse of her hot milf body naked? Remember how you felt uneasy when she started to jack you off with her pussy? Remember how Zack found out and invited his brothers to beat you up, then beat you off? Remember how Zack's mom gave birth to Mirth, your illegatimate son? Remember how you'd often go round to her house for your son to bone your ass whilst dumping your diarerria down Zack's mom's mouth? Remember how Belding found out and joined in too? Remember how the school nurse told you that Zack and you were, in fact, brothers? Remember how sick you felt as you recalled each time you shafted the milf? Remember how you thought nothing of it and kept going back for more? You sure were into in-bred back then!



07th July 2005 - 07:23:06 AM
42336 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech,remember how you were drugged by Jessie? Remember how you ended up feeling up her chest during History? Remember how the teacher got pissed off? Remember how you accidentally called the teacher "mom", despite the teacher being Mr Smith? Remember how everybody laughed at you? Remember how you got sent to detention? Remember how Mr Smith stuck cue sticks up your ass? Remember how you dumped your load all over Smith's face, exclaiming how much you loved "mom" -- remember how Jessie filmed the whole thing and got History banned because it was filled with males who she referred to as "pigs"? Remember how you saw that tape and got pissed off and replaced Jessies homrone replacement tablets with no-doz? Remember how the druggie Jessie got hoooked on the shit? Remember how she said "I'm so scared?!" Remember how you said "Ah shut up you pill-popping feminst cheerleading hypocrite!" Remember how Slater was right next to you and gave you a black eye, before jabbing a pencil in your penis eye? Jackass!



07th July 2005 - 07:17:33 AM
42335 : RememberWhen
Hey Kelly remember when you used to be a cheerleader? Remember how Jessie was a feminist cheerleader? Remember how Belding used to inspect the cheerleading team up close and personal? Remember how he had you, Jessie and Lisa in his room being inspected for any "creases" by his schlong? Remember how he'd fill your zoink hole with his zoinker? Remember how Screech found out and told to the whole school, including the foreign exchange students? Remember how Belding lost his job, hair and blow-up doll? Remember how Screech became prinicpal for a day and insisted that all the guys be cheerleaders for a day and got them all ready for inspection? Remember how you walked in wondering what happened to your soiled cotton panties and jersey when you saw Slater ravaging Screech's butt-hole? Remember how you faited and woke up with every guy dumping their load into your hussy pussy? You sure got pregnant that time!



06th July 2005 - 08:41:36 AM
41244 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember how Zack fleeced Kelly's parents out of millions to buy a racehorse? Remember how Kelly couldn't understand how her parents got broke and became a depressed unemployable hack? Remember how Zack told you to look after the horse whilst he dumped his load into Kelly's twat? Remember how you used to be jealous of the horses dick and cut it off and stuck it top on your own? Remember how the horse died and Zack blamed you for interrupting his first time with kelly? Remember how Kelly walked in seeing Zack beating off your horse cock? Remember how Kelly suddenly jumped on the horse cock? Remember how much of an ass you felt when you realised she didn't have sex with you, but with the horse cock instead? remember how Zack stuck the cock in your mouth and dumped you at Valley high school with a note saying you eat their prized horse? Remember how they beat you up and returned you to bayside with the words "ZOINKS" on the sign? Remember how this became your trademark cliched catchphrase?



06th July 2005 - 08:35:45 AM
41243 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember how in the New Class you seemed to spend an inaudimate amount of time in Belding's office? Remember how you used to have a goatee in that series? Remember how you seemed to be making a lot of the school's announcements ending with the words "ZOINKS!" just as Belding penciled in to your gaping rectum hole? Remember how at the year's end the school had a fancy dress competition and you came in a robin costume to Belding's Batman costume? Remember how Belding repeadily raped your ass whilst in full Batman costume? Remember how you used to say "Holy anal sex Batman!" Remember how Adam West found out and had a schlong fight with Belding? Remember how you expected lots of Biffs and Bops to explode out of Belding's face? Remember how this didn't happen and only blood came out? remember how afterwards he took you from Behind as an "old chum".. remember how you couldn't sit down afterwards? You sure got hepatics C that time screech!



06th July 2005 - 08:29:58 AM
41242 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember when you were in deep shit with Belding's school's creditors when you blew all the money on a blow up Belding doll with a massive 10 foot penis? Remember how you tried to pretend it was a bouncy castle and people used to jump up and down on the bouncy penis, especally Zack and Slater? Remember how you wish they were bouncing on your penis instead? Remember how ended up escaping to Mexico when Belding found out what you did? Remember how you returned the next year as Raul? Remember how you pretended to be Slater's long lost boyfriend so you could rub dicks with him? Remember how you creamed into his jerry curl and he kicked your ass when he found out you were Screech? Remember how you ended up paying for the massive debts outta your failed comedy routines whilst being labotomised by Belding's dick? No wonder you failed at getting laid in the entire series of Saved by the Bell.



06th July 2005 - 08:23:38 AM
41241 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember when Fred Savage, Winnie and that kid in the glasses came to your school? Remember how Fred could never get with Winnie and you thought you'd have a try? Remember how it was halloween and that kid in the glasses came dressed as a decapitaded Winnie to scare the bejesus out of Fred? Remember how you got really hard at the thought of dumping your zubaz into her anus? Remember how you began to ram her up the ass? Remember how Kevin screamed and kicked you in the ribs to get you off his ass, which he said was only for Fred? Remember how you were surprised to find it was Kevin but carried on screwing him anyways? Remember how Belding said "hey hey hey, that's your brother?!" Remember how you shrugged your shoulders and dumped your herpes loaded cream into the ravaged anus of Kevin? Remember how he never appeared on The Wonder Years after that? Remember how people used to think he grew up to be Marylin Manson? Remember how he beat you to a bloody pulp? You sure got zoinked good that time!



06th July 2005 - 06:29:00 AM
41240 : Mr. Y
"Hey Max Goldberg, remember when you were a little kid who loved nothing more than to watch Saved by the Bell episodes after school? Remember when they had the contest where you could win a trip to the set and visit all of your childhood heroes? Remember when you sat in front of the TV all week, waiting with incredible anticipation for each day's secret code word? Remember how, after watching all week and getting all five, you entered the contest? Remember how surprised you were when you won? Remember how excited you were, sitting on the plane, flying all the way across the country to Los Angeles? Remember when you finally got to Hollywood, how taken in with the glitz and glamour you were? Remember how when you entered the NBC studio lot, you were so excited that your hands wouldn't stop shaking? Remember when the big moment came, when you finally fulfilled your childhood dream and met the cast? Remember when your dream turned into a nightmare when Dustin Diamond, pretending like he was about to shake your hand, instead brought his knee up into the bridge of your nose? Remember how you went down like Mrs. Powers at an Elvis convention? Remember how Mark-Paul Gosselaar and Mario Lopez repeatedly kicked you in the ribs while Dennis Haskins tore your Zubaz from your twitching body? Remember how the girls laughed as Screech positioned himself behind you and screamed "THIS IS HOW A WEST COAST KIKE GETS DOWN!", and proceeded to violate your virgin anus in ways that your shattered young mind couldn't even begin to comprehend? Remember when Brandon Tartikoff slapped you in the face with his flaccid, coke-numbed dick? Remember how Mario Lopez made you suck off his Chihuahua? Remember how Hayley Mills just happened to walk by, and stuck a Q-Tip in your pisstube? Remember how the entire crew filled up an entire trash can with shit and semen? Remember how Dennis Haskins put his hand to his ear, as if to soak in the cheers of the crew, as well as your cries of agony, and then gave you a piledriver into it? Remember how you bled and screamed and cried, and as security dragged the trash can off the lot you swore that you would get revenge on the entire cast? Remember when you made dustindiamond.com and exposed Screech to the world as the flaming catrapist that he really is? Boy, you really got him good that time!"



28th June 2005 - 01:12:00 PM
33289 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember when Zack used your nerdy computer skills to salami slice the school funds into his private account and used the funds to buy and race a thoroughbred horse? Remember how you were strangley attracted to the obviousily male horse? Remember how you used to ride it to school, home and work? Remember how your dad used to lecture you for hours how he didn't go to WW2 so that you could ride a horse? Remember how you nicked the horse and made it ram you, repeadley? Remember how much people used to complain that you used to smell of horse shit but couldn't tell the kids why? Remember how the next day the horse couldn't run and Zack lost all his money on the track? Remember how Belding found out and sent Zack to 9 months in Military school? Remember how when he returned he smiled, accepted your apology and then broke both your legs? Remember how you looked up to his blue eyes and said "zoinks" just as he pulled out his meat & dumped his load on your face? Remember how he made you eat your horse?



28th June 2005 - 01:06:40 PM
33288 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember how you got you launched a reality TV show called "Punching Dead Celebrities" Remember how everybody thought you were dead, but said "meh" and punched you anyway because you were screech? Remember how you went from this to launch a multiple of reality TV shows like "You've been shot" and the homo-erotic "Screech and Belding's Jail house rock" where each episode you'd get anally raped by Belding and his cellmates for at least 3 hours? Remember how the series ended with you in a hospital with your ass hole wider than Roseanne Barr's waistline and a cricket bat up your ass? Remember how they pulled it out and you said "Zoinks!" Remember how everybody cried with laughter as the series ended... Remember how people in the street used to laugh right up to your pathetic face?



28th June 2005 - 01:01:31 PM
33287 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, Remember how the Navy took over fitness? Remember how they made you climb up ropes, scrub the latrines with your dick and suck donkey cocks for breakfast? Remember how the Navy decided to make you their official mascot? Remember how they made you poster boy for the 1980s? Remember how everybody laughed when the poster showed you smiling your ass off with the caption "Join the navy and fuck screech in the ass, for free?!" Remember how you don't remember agreing to that? Remember how your agent screwed you out of ten dollars just to get the deal? Remember how you ended up replacing some blonde girl as the official navy girl of choice? Remember how each navy cadete would pledge alligance to the flag whilst dumping his load into your unsavory ass? You sure got fucked over that time, jackass!



28th June 2005 - 12:56:22 PM
33286 : RememberWhen
Hey zitface, Remember how you got tons of facial warts and zits? Remember how Belding used to jack off over your face in a futile jesture to rid you of your zits? Remember how the milk drenched your screwed up face? Remember how one time you ran into the Chemical lab screaming your face off pretending that your face was being attacked by a chemical virus? Remember how the students pissed themselves and ran out of the school? Remember how you thought your cum-drenched face prank was the funniest thing since sliced bread? Remember how the kids found out and dumped you into a vat of toxic waste of some local industry baron? Remember how the press got wind of the story and turned you into the cock sucking toxic waste bastard? Remember how you took them to court to sue 'em for libel? Remember how you lost? Remember how they came all over your face giving you acne for the rest of your pitaful life? You sure got aids that time.



19th June 2005 - 12:19:31 PM
24329 : RememberWhen
Screech, remember how you came to school dressed as Michael Jackson? Remember how people thought it was strange how you used to come a lot in the Jackson pants? Remember how the local papers used to accuse you as "being Jackson" and hung around with all the kids of Bayside - remember how Jackson sent Lotia Jackson over to kick you in the nuts and serve you with a legal writ? Remember how you wanted to settle out of court? Remember how Jackson "agreed"? Remember how he invited you to his house to "mutally agree the deal"? Remember how you reappeared in school with your pants down? Remember how your face was a ghosty white? Remember how you promised you would never drink a glass of wine ever again? Remember how Belding overheard you and used to poision your milk carton's with wine, got you drunk and used to anally shaft you whilst you were in his car? Remember how you became the anal jockey you are today because of this one mistake? You sure got screwed that time punk!



19th June 2005 - 12:14:02 PM
24299 : RememberWhen
Screech, remember how you guys graduated but nobody told you, leaving you to return the next year? Remember how it was a totally "new class" and you wondered what was going on? Remember how Belding used to dress you up in his soiled leather jacket in a futile bid to make you hip? Remember how you wanted to be the "Fonz" but ended up being a 40-something honors student that "hung" around all 6 of the school's students? Remember how Belding used to keep you in his room hours on end whilst he dumped his load into your backside whilst you had his jacket on? Remember how the new class used to call you an assclown? Remember how they used to throw cow pies at your face? Remember how it kinda tasted like Belding's poo? Remember how you stood there for 30 whole minutes getting cow pies thrown at your face? Remember how a major manure company got you to be their sponsor and you ended up being shat directly upon by cows in a futile bid to show the public that "cows are safe" - remember how you couldn't stop itching for years after that? You sure got dumped on back then didn't you?



10th June 2005 - 11:27:01 AM
17608 :
Hey Screech, remember that Zack Attack episode on Save by the Bell that was hosted by Casey Kasem? Remember when you guys first began playing in a garage and then made it big and got a record contract and went on tour and got that new manager chick who caused the band to become divided? Remember when she helped Zack's ego become inflated and he went solo as a result? Remember when Slater became a racecar driver and ended up in the hospital and Zack heard about it and dumped the manager chick so he could be by Slater's side? Remember when you showed up and you and Zack and Slater had sweaty unprotected makeup sex back in the garage and then Mr. Belding showed up to find out why nobody had shown up for school in over a year and caught all three of you and personally performed his own version of the 'Zack Attack' on you while covered in maple syrup? I wonder why NBC deleted that scene, I thought it was funny.



10th June 2005 - 11:17:21 AM
17607 : RememberWhen
Hey Zack remember when you and slater got drunk and started to watch the complete works of Russ Myer? Remember how you thought Slater wouldn't bat an eyelid for when you got your schlong out for the "big titted women"? Remember how Slater proceeded to grease up your flute with his greasy mexi-mullet jerri-curlled hair? Remember how you shot your jism into his hair? Remember how he smiled and sucked the rest of your feebleness off? Remember how the next day you ratted on Belding and he forced Slater to wear a tu-tu? Remember Zack, how Slater got into his favorite college? Remember how you forced your way into his college too by getting James to tickle your cock with his fake 'tache? Remember how Belding never could understand what on between you two? Remember how much of a jockstrap you were to Slater's flute? God you were pathetic back then...



10th June 2005 - 11:11:59 AM
17604 : RememberWhen
Hey, Zoinksboy, Remember when your school held its annual soapbox derby? Remember how you built your shitty car from old hubcaps and boxes of Cornflakes? Remember how you had to pawn off your grandma's necklace to get the money to enter? Remember how you had to get anal with the local scrap-metal merchant to get the front bumpber for your car? Remember how you dreamed of taking Slater up the rear whilst in your car watching some 50s horric film? Remember how on the day of the derby you were locked in your garage by local schoolkids? Remember how you nearly choked to death from the car fumes? Remember how Belding came around to give you the kiss of life? Remember how you enjoyed it and began responded by steadily growing erect against Belding's inner thigh? Remember how Belding made you "headboy" of the school - a medal only bestowed unto one of "Belding's Boys"? Remember how the next year you set fire to all but your car so you could win Belding's schlong milk? Those were the days!



09th June 2005 - 02:21:54 PM
16596 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember how Zack would come up with a zany scheme to make money in every episode much like Sgt Bilko? Remember how one time Zack set up a lemondade stand? Remember how he'd force you to get up early to crush all the lemons? Remember how you ran out of stock and decided to supplement the lemons with your piss? Remember how kids from all over the state used to come over and drink your mucas urine? Remember how you told Zack it was your secret formula & patented as being "Golden Shower Lemonade"? Remember how the kids used to pull pubic hair from their mouths? Remember how many got zits, boils and ill from your piss? Remember how Belding rumbled you & forced you to shower in his "juice"? Remember how your skin became a zit-ridden, diseased pasty-cretin you call a face? Remember how you stupidily tried to use industrial bleech to get rid of the zits but the toxic chemicals burnt off half your face instead? Remember how much of a total jackass pansy you were back then and still are? Jackass.



08th June 2005 - 02:18:08 PM
16050 :
Hey Dustin, remember the episode where Screech entered in the Miss Bayside pagent? Remember how in the show Screech's robot gave him a shinner? Remember how the producers had to write that in because you came on set with a black eye one day? Remember how they asked about how you got it and you started to shake? Remember how your leather starfish loosened up and you let out a stream of bloody shit and cum? Remember how the producer told you to tell them what happened for "your safety?" Remember how you started talking about how Mario Lopez called you into his dressing room? Remember how he was listening to UB40's greatest hits? Remember when he asked you if his pink tank top looked cool? Remember when you said he looked like a beaner? Remember how he became enraged and busted you in the face? Remember how your eye started to swell and you said you were gonna tell? Remember how he said "loose lips sink ships you fucking kyke!" Remember how after he yelled that he pushed you over and pulled down his acid washed jeans and whipped out his throbbing cock? Remember how he ripped down your pants and slammed his cock in your pimply ass? Remember how he used his grease from his hair as lube? Remember how he fucked your ass to the beat of UB40? Remember how you squeeled and wiggled around and he tore up your rectum as a result? Remember how he started to pound you harder? Remember how you thought it'd be over soon and then you felt self start to shit? Remember how he scooped it up and put his hand on your mouth so you are forced to eat it? Remember how he let out a scream in his mexican language? Remember how he then blew his load in your ass? Remember how he shoved cotton in your ass to keep your shit and blood and his cum in your ass? Remember how he said that if you were to tell anyone he'd repeat his actions? Remember how you made your way to your dressing room and cried yourself to sleep and you made yourself forget it? Remember how after you told the producers your story you thought that they were gonna do something about it? Remember how they started to laugh at you? Remember how you felt when you poured your heart out and they stepped on it? Remember how they claimed Mario was "joking?" Remember how they took you to his dressing room to show you that he was "kidding?" Remember how they locked the door behind you? Remember how the producers and Mario took turns fucking your ass and mouth? Remember how Mario ate out your filthy ass? Remember how you tried to will yourself to death? Remember how you just passed out? Remember how you woke up in your trailor with a shaved head and dressed in rags? Remember how you walked into Mario's dressing room? Remember how Mario and the producers were watching a video of how they role played with your passed out ragdoll of a body? Remember how disgusted you were when you saw that they roled played you as an Auschwitz victim? Man, they sure raked you over the coals that day!



07th June 2005 - 12:24:02 PM
15046 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember how Zack and Slater used to fight over Kelly every episode? Remember how they beat each other off literally and methaphorically? Remember how Belding said they should sort it out like "men"? Remember how they proceeded to a swordfight with their dicks? Remember how they fought over Kelly in your ravaged, gang-banged, cockfucked hellhole you call your bumhole? Remember how you exclaimed "Zoinks!" when Kelly saw your tiny scrawny body being savaged? Remember how she joined in? No wait, this was one of your fucked up drug-fuelled dream sequences... Remember how you still wet the bed today? Remember how your mom took you onto Jerry Springer? Remember how you exclaimed to Springer that "Hitler was right!" Remember how he began to beat you up? Remember how his bodyguards joined in? Remember how you ended up celebrating your 18th on your own in some asylum somewhere called New Jersey? You sure got zoinked big time fuckwit.



07th June 2005 - 11:28:29 AM
15044 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, Remember when you married a male chimp? Remember how you'd put it into diapers? Remember how you'd tease its genitals with your dick? Remember how you dreamed you were on the Planet of the Apes? Remember the dream sequence had you screwing male apes every which way but lose? Remember how you wanted to get their "damn dirty hands" on you? Remember how by at the end of the dream you realised that Planet of the Apes was really Earth? Remember how you exclaimed the death of all humanity by proudly saying "Zoinks!" before coming all over the burnt statue of liberty's face? Remember how you shrugged your shoulders, woke up and kept screwing your male chimp wondering if Planet of the Apes would ever come true ... You sure were a dumb fuck back then weren't you?!



07th June 2005 - 11:12:07 AM
15042 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember when the school held its annual movie competition? Remember how you decided to dress up as MC Hammer, complete with baggy trousers and gangbangable hole for your poop-shoot? Remember how you made a really crappy rap with a close up of your face screaming "ZOINKS!" every five seconds? Remember how Zack thought it'd be funny to intersplice hardcore gay pornography before every cry of Zoinks? Remember how you played the tape in music class? Remember the tune? "Go Screech! Go Screech! Go (cut to interspliced image of hard cock rammed up Slater's ass then a close up of Screech's face)... ZOINKS!"... Remember how you were barred from school? Remember how your tape made you the 80s version of the Star Wars Kid? Remember how Belding used to come around to your house late at night to give you homework? Remember how he anally pleasured your ass with his bent dick whilst you were dressed up as MC Hammer belching "ZOINKS!" Remember how you remain the social dickwad you are today?



04th June 2005 - 02:44:40 PM
14302 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember when you lost your memory? Remember how you couldn't remember the hot anal goo that Belding deposited into your sweet cherry pie? Remember how you couldn't remember how Zack pre-recorded your "ZOINKS!" and put it on a loop and made you share his genital warts whilst he played the song repeadely? Remember how you forgot the time when Slater brought his military dad to come over and sodimise you? Remember how you forgot to suck him off and straddle his military missile? Remember how he forgot to wear a condom and got the same warts as Zack? Remember how he shipped you off to Cuba on a Naval frigate? Remember how you forgot the proud naval tradition of celebrating your entry hole with pale and circumstance? Remember how you forgot to leave your backdoor open to every passing navy merchant? Remember, when you returned home that no-one cared? Remember how you forgot to get your passport and you were promptly dumped back to Cuba? Remember how you forgot what an idiot you were back then?



04th June 2005 - 12:34:38 PM
14299 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember when you discovered Zack kept a cardboard cut out of Kelly under his bed? Remember how you also discovered his secret stash of gay pornography? Remember hot you became when Zack began to stroke your schlong with his noticable erection? Remember how he punched a hole through cardboard Kelly's pussy with his fist? Remember how he positioned the cut-out over your ass and began, repeadily, to butt-fuck your ass for well over 9 hours? Remember how he treated it like a machine? Remember the milky dross he spilt into it? Remember how he wailed in extasy the words "Oh Slater!!!" Remember how you told pretty much everybody else in the school? Remember how in Gym Zack became the social dickwad he remains today? Remember how Zack became a drunk with your phone number? Remember how he'd call you late at night and molest your asshole over the phone? Remember how you had to grow a goatee and become a strugglin' stand up comic? Remember how this didn't work out and you became Zack's love-play-toy?



04th June 2005 - 12:26:06 PM
14298 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember when the school stuck oil? remember how greasy the oil workers got? remember how much the thought of oil men drilling it deep turned your ass on? Remember how you tempted the men to drill your ass and plunder it? Remember how, one by one, the men backed you in? Remember how they accidentally turned their oil drilling machine on and it began to rip your asshole a new one? Remember how it struck oil? Remember how the oil was really blood? Remember how much mess you made? Remember how much you bled all over the blueprints? Remember how this pretty much ruined Bayside's attempts at getting rich because they didn't photocopy the plans? Remember how the entire school held a big party and lined up to one by one kick you in the nuts? Remember how they sold T-shirts and made money off your name? Remember how you got revenge by exposing kids to "laughing" gas? Remember you forgot to load the n2o? Remember how they were laughing at you and not with you? You sure were a muppet back then!



04th June 2005 - 12:15:49 PM
14297 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember how the school's budget meant they had to cancel sex ed? Remember in your sexual frustration you asked Belding to "do" something about it? Remember how he taught your ass to sing to the many tunes of Frankie Goes to Hollywood? Remember how Belding replaced sex ed with a pirated tape of Teen Wolf? Remember how much the Teen Wolf was seduced by the hot blonde? Remember how you assumed when she escaped out of frame, she'd escaped for more hot and hairy bestial wolf love? Remember how much you screamed ZOINKS! as you sure the wolf howling at the blonde's tits? Remember how you came all over the TV from 15 yards away? Remember how you damaged the only TV in the state? Remember how it couldn't be fixed? Remember how you ruined the class? Remember how they tied you up to some trees & tempted wolves to come over to you as the meaningless carcus you are? Remember how you the idea of hot wolfal love began to turn you on? Remember how the wolves bit you off and you nearly bled to death? Assclown.



04th June 2005 - 10:49:23 AM
14296 : Maxwell Nerdstrom
Hey Screech, remember the school prom? Remember how you were unable to get a date? Remember how Zack was going with Kelly, Slater with Jessie, and even I had a date, but you couldn't get one because you were so worthless? Remember how Belding told you to cheer up and said you could go as his date? Remember how you had to borrow your dad's old wedding tux from the 70s? Remember how everyone laughed at you and started calling you names when, on prom night, you turned up in your brown corduroy tuxedo with huge lapels and flared trousers, with Belding leading you by the hand onto the dance floor? Remember how Belding said "Don't you listen to them, you look hot" and started to do the lambada with you? Remember how aroused you were by Belding grinding his crotch against you, and you pitched a noticable erection, which Belding kept fondling? Remember how the two of you were voted "king and queen" of the prom, with you as the queen? Remember how Belding whispered in your ear, "time to consumate the marriage, BITCH" and dragged you out into the janitor's closet, where he proceeded to have violent, unprotected buttsex with you for a full hour? Remember how afterwards, you were staggering down the corridor when you heard strange sounds coming from the nurse's office, so you went to investigate? Remember how you burst in and found Zack and Slater fucking on the bed? Remember how you said "ZOINKS!!!" and your erection shot through the fly of your trousers and fired your love goo all over the two of them? Remember how they were pretty pissed off and held you down on the bed and proceeded to swordfight inside your already well-ravaged asshole? Remember how afterwards you wearily climbed into your limo, only to find Milo the janitor there, who forcibly sodomized you all the way home? Remember how, by the end of the evening, your asshole was hanging open like a Chinaman's sleeve? ZOINKS!!



03rd June 2005 - 03:44:05 PM
14290 : RememberWhen
Hey screech, remember Jessie's stepbrother Eric? Remember how dark & evil he was? Remember you used to rub cocks with him whilst plotting the downfall of Zach/Slater? Remember how Eric made you his NY Bi'atch? Remember how he destroyed Slater's car and you took the fall? Remember how he put in you in a bunch of tyres? Remember how the darkness reminded you the way belding used to do it to you? Remember how Zach/Slater punched the snot of you for no real reason? Remember how you got Eric back by kicking him in the nuts? Remember how he stripped you naked and threw you into the girls locker room? Remember how the girls laughed at your scarny body? Remember how much it hurt to see Lisa uncontrollably slap the floor in jest at your puny muscles? Remember how she pissed herself and couldn't stop laughing? Remember how this laughing was heard in the males locker rooms? Remember how they joined in to laugh? Remember how it was all taped & you became a laughing stock for 3 generations? You sure got screwed that time!



03rd June 2005 - 03:31:57 PM
14289 : RememberWhen
Hey screech, remember the episode where if you failed a test by an obnoxious teacher, you wouldn't be able to go on a class fieled trip. Remember how Belding's brother Rod took over? Remember how he was called Rod for a reason? Remember how Belding introduced you to Rod as the local nerd with Hasselhoff hair? Remember how Belding instructed you to bend over and you did it without questioning? Remember how Rod began to ram you on 3 non-consequtive occasions? Remember how Belding gave you a reach around? Remember how they threw you out of the room with no clothes and covered in goo? Remember how all 6 students of Bayside gathered around you and laughed their asses off at your pitaful attempts to get better grades? Remember how you tried killing yourself by throwing yourself off the top flight of stairs? Remember how it failed because there was only 1 flight of stairs in the entire school and it didn't go anywhere? Remember how you wandered into the kindergarden school and got promptly arrested and jailed? Idiot



03rd June 2005 - 03:23:07 PM
14288 : RememberWhen
Hey screech, Remember when you got struck by lightning? Remember how you were then able to see into the future? Remember how you saw flying cars, people wearing baking foil and people on mars? Remember how none of that shit came true? Remember how Zack made you bet on the winner of some horse race? Remember how he lost all his money? Remember the pain he inflicted on your tiny, puny and weak ass? Remember how he made his money back by selling you to the horse track to help the horse's breed? Remember how this involved getting very anal with horses? Remember how sore your stupid ass became? Remember how the track manager heard about your talents and used to jolt you with his electric cow rod? Remember how he used to stick it firmly between your but cheeks? Remember the mess it created all over your pants? Remember how the cow rod was electified and this was how you got your crappy foresight powers in the first place? Remember how much the kids laughed at you being prodded like the cheap male whore you are?



03rd June 2005 - 03:17:40 PM
14287 : RememberWhen
Remember when Lisa's dad gave her a credit card? Remember how she went overboard and her payment was due so she had to find a way to earn some money? Remember how you spent years accumlating money for such an occasion? Remember how you earnt this money from loaning your ass to Belding and every other teacher to purposley ram? Remember how you bought Lisa? Remember how she promised to suck you off? Remember how she lead you to a dark room? Remember you felt someone sucking you off? Remember when they put the lights on it was nothing more than a vaccum cleaner? Remember how your dick got stuck? Remember how Lisa remarked "It'd be a cold day in hell before she sucked you off?" as she counting the money in her hand? Remember how much of an ass you felt? Remember how you had to walk around school in a skirt for a whole month to hide the vaccum cleaner? Remember how Zack sold you to the chess club as a girl who would do Anal? remember how you loved every second of it? Remember how diseased your ass became?



03rd June 2005 - 03:09:21 PM
14286 : RememberWhen
Remember when Jessie got hooked on no'doz? Remember how she exclaimed "I'm so exicted... I'm so excited.. I'm so scared!"? Remember how she stole these lines from you when she overheard you exclaim the same exact words to Zack before he introduced his penis to your ass? Remember how much milky goodness he spewed all over your rectum? Remember how Zack was gonna get transfered to Stansbury but got James with a fake mushtache to get him out of trouble? Remember how James used to tickle your dick with that same exact mustache? Remember how the 'tache used to come off his face unexpectely and James/Zack couldn't keep a straight face? Remember how you came all over James' face to glue that fake tashe to his rather old, weather-beaten face? Remember how this meant you couldn't go to your favored college and you had to go to the same college as Zack/Slater and endure months of unprotected buttsex with that overweight "gym" teacher? You sure got screwed that time!



03rd June 2005 - 10:46:18 AM
14284 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember when you guest-starred on tv's Happy Days? Remember how much you wondered why a 40-y/o guy (the Fonz) hung around with teenagers? Remember how, one night, he showed you by riding your ass like his prized motorcycle & how he told you he rode Marion Cunningham? Remember how much you liked licking his meat? Remember how you got the hots for Joanie? Remember how you got it on with her? Remember how you, in your drunken state, mistook Joanie for Chachi? Remember how much you soaked his face with your creamy mucass? Remember how he let you wear that stupid wrist braclet he always had on around your cock and let him ride you, repeadely? Oh wait... that was Robin Williams.. My mistake.



03rd June 2005 - 10:39:02 AM
14283 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember when ALF was a special guest on the show? Remember how Zack told you he was a puppet? Remember how you said you didn't believe him? Remember how upset you were at the very thought that your favorite ALF was a puppet? Remember you asked Zack to prove it by showing you how the "puppet" was operated? Remember how Zack yanked down your pants, turned you over and shoved his hand up your ass? Remeber he didn't lube up his hand? Remember how much it hurt? Remember how Zack said "This is how ALF works... by someone sticking their hand up its ass!" Remember how much of a dork you were? Remember how much the puppet operator busted you two and proceeded to butfuck your smiley ass with his meat and oodling at the top of his voice at how your ass was much better than ALFs? Remember how the producers cancelled the ALF show the next day because they found out you tried to dump your load in its backside? Remember how you ruined the only show you ever loved? Remember how ALF's operators beat you up?



03rd June 2005 - 06:12:34 AM
14280 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, Remember when you saw Teen Wolf and you got a hard on whenever you saw MJFox wolfing out? Remember how much you wanted to be in his place when Pamela Wells showed off her bra to Fox? Remember how you remember in a basketball match you thought you could get laid by wearing a Stile's Teen Wolf T-shirt and in full Teen Wolf costume? Remember how much of an idiot you looked? Remember how everybody thought you were just going through pubety? Remember how they played the song "Win in the End" and you thought it'd be cool to recreate the basketball dribbles that Fox did in that movie? Remember how nobody played along and it just looked like you were being really, really stupid by constantly giving the ball away? Remember how the other players beat you up after school and came all over your teen wolf costume? Remember how it cost $300 to get it all out? Remember how you had to sell you're ass to Belding to earn money? Remember how you forgot to collect the money but kept going back for more?



03rd June 2005 - 06:04:46 AM
14279 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, Remember that time when the school had its Karate championship and you thought it would be cool to dress up as Daniel Laruso from the movie Karate Kid? Remember how much of an idiot you looked in the kata suit that was one size too big for you? Remember how it was the smallest size they had? Remember how much you taped the end music "You're the best around" and played it when it was your time to fight? Remember how you, in the first round, your opponent broke your kneecaps? Remember how Belding took you to your room and played the "You're the best around" on the loud speakers with him squeezing his dick in your ass? Remember the loud squishing noises? Remember how the tune kept blaring "You're the best, around" whenever Belding pounded you? Remember how this kinda reminded you of that scene when Miyagi healed Laurso's knee in a similar fashion? Remember how you got back in the competition & tried to do the Crane Kick? Remember how it didn't work and you ended up in hospital for 3 weeks?



02nd June 2005 - 08:09:18 AM
14083 : RememberWhen
(from below)
Hey Screech, remember how he licked and enjoyed it? Remember how you exploded all over his face? Remember how Belding's wife came into the room and saw you two? Remember the shock on her face? Remember how she was like 6 months pregnant and you got a real big hard-on? Remember how she allowed you to systematically punish her entry hole? Remember how you remembered 6 months ago doing this? Remember how the kid was really yours and not Beldings? Remember how angry Belding was when he found out that his bastard son was in fact your spawn? Remember how he sold your sister on the black market? Remember how, in a few months time, she returned as Tori Spelling? Remember how much you wanted to screw her when she returned? Remember how you forgot she was your sister? God you sure were an idiot back then.



02nd June 2005 - 08:02:04 AM
14082 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember when you lot went to Hawaii and Zack got a new girlfriend? Remember how bitchy she was to you? Remember how Kelly was in heat and would take anything in? Remember how she hooked up with some little kid? Remember how you wish it was you instead? Remember how, in your petculance, you screwed Zack's new girl? Remember how Zack found out and beat you within an inch of your life? Remember how Kelly found out and felt sorry for you? Remember how you felt like Kelly was gonna suck you off, but instead gave you that cardboard cut out of her from under Zack's bed? Remember how you snuck it home, cut out a hole between its legs and began to repeadily screw it? Remember how you forgot that you had mistakenly walked into Belding's room with the cardboard cut-out and was pummilng Belding's ass instead? Remember how Belding looked at the cut-out after you finished and remarked "I haven't tasted kelly before" and began licking your spew from the cardboard cut out hole you made in the picture of kelly?



02nd June 2005 - 07:24:58 AM
14081 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember when everybody decided to do a murder mystery weekend? Remember how you dressed up as the French maid? Remember how comfortable the dress felt against your oily, greasy skin? Remember how Belding paid you to clean his room and whenever you bended over you got to feel his thick one up your pipes? Remember how Zack had a fake moustache which made him look a member of YCMA? Remember Slater's smoking pipe and how much you wish he was smoking your dick instead? Remember how everybody got real scared when somebody was murdered for real? Remember how they brought in TV's Columbo? Remember how scruffy he looked? Remember how he asked you tons of questions? Remember he kept saying "Just one more thing"? Remember how this "one more thing" lead to you being alone with him in his room? Remember how he took out his glass eye and precedded to let you fill up his eye socket with your cock? Remember how bony it felt? Remember how he used this as evidence against you and you got framed for murder? Idiot



02nd June 2005 - 06:40:40 AM
14080 : RememberWhen
(from below...)

Remember how you were left there with no means of escape? Remember how, when you thought everybody had disappeared, you got out only to be confronted by a load of school children? Remember how they covered their eyes? Remember how much of a hardon you got from all their stares? Remember how you came, unexpedely, all over some fat kid? Remember how you were thrown in prision of 30 days for publically flashing? Remember how the school never went swimming again and you became the social priar that you remain today? Remember how much of an ass you felt when your picture was splashed on the front cover of all the local newspapers as "Fat kid takes it on the face from local flasher?" - remember how the picture captured the spew covered all over the fat kid? Remember how, in the picture, he sorta looked like chunk from the Goonies doing his trademark "truffle shuffle"? Remember how much you loved that scene and posted it on your wall? Remember how much of your spew you deposited on that picture?



02nd June 2005 - 06:34:26 AM
14079 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember when the entire school went swimming? Remember how much you enjoyed watching the guys get changed in front of you? Remember how much you tried to hide your pecker as it stedily grew erect at the sight of Slater's tight Mexican ass? Remember how he smelt of colone? Remember how much you want to buttfuck Zach's blonde ass too? Remember when all the guys saw all the girls in their swimwear? Remember how hard every guy got at the sight of Kelly in tight swimwear? Remember how everybody got in the pool? Remember how you tried to rub yourself against the guy's todgers? Remember how you in your efforts you forgot you couldn't swim? Remember how everybody laughed at you? Remember how you farted underwater? Remember how much it stunk the air? Remember how the guys were pissed because Belding had to evacuate the pool because of your stinky underwater fart? Remember how the guys ripped off your shorts and threw you in the pool totally naked? (Continued above)

01st June 2005 - 04:07:48 PM
14069 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember how in the prank wars against valley you stole their pig and ate it? Remember how they responded by setting off stink pheromen bombs during gym and all the girls and guys were in the middle of a field with only towels on? Remember how they all suddenly got it on in front of you and you were the only one left holding his piece? Remember how you tried to jump into Slater's big manly arms but he knocked you out for 4 hours? Remember how when you came to you were in Valley's school, kidnapped - and was being anally ratified by their new mascot... an elephant? Remember how no-one came to save you? Remember how Valley seem to lose every pointless wrestling match from then on? Remember you knew why? It was because they were having too much fun laughing at your poor undeserving ass being rammed by an elephant... Remember how you escaped by drugging the elephant with the same phermones - remember how it got incredibily horny? Remember how much you paid the price for your stupidity? Remember how many laughs Valley had at your expense?



01st June 2005 - 04:01:36 PM
14068 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, remember how scrawny you were? Remember how you ran like a girl with your arms all over the place? Remember how you really, really wanted to get bigger muscles and decided to take Slater's after-school class and even took steroids to get the muscles? Remember how Slater fooled you into believing the steroids were making you a muscle-bound freak when, in fact, they were slowly turning you into a girl? Remember how the hormone replacement tablets made you very open to suggestion? Remember how Slater inserted all sorts of gym equipment up your rectum? Remember how he made you wear a liotard to school? Remember how tight it felt against your sore ass? Remember how much you hated your dick being in the way and got yourself drunk in humilation? Remember how, in your drunken state, you tried to cut it off but failed because your muscles ached too much? Remember how you collapsed and when you awoke Slater was depositing his load all over your face? Remember how sticky it tasted? Remember how you flushed the hormone tablets down the loo but kept going to his class for extra lessons, despite the fact you hardly grew a single muscle and remained a scrawny ass for the rest of your life?



01st June 2005 - 03:47:16 PM
14067 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, Remember when you finally got a girl in the shape of Tori Spelling? Remember that screwed up face she had? Remember how much of a nerd she looked? Remember how she sorta looked similar to you? Remember how she felt when you first zoinked her up her tight anus and pussy? Remember how you thought of Slater each and every time? Remember how you got her pregant? Remember how a few weeks later your reclusive dad turned up and told you that Spelling was in fact your sister? Remember how much you hurlled down the toilet? Remember how you kept screwing her anyway? Remember how you remarked .. "You know if I was Luke, I'd bang Leia" and it came true? Remember how your demon son tried to get you killed? Remember how you had to kill the only son by wearing making him watch reruns of the munsters? Remember how much of a hardon you got whenever Frank Gwyane got on the screen and had that funny expression on his face? Remember how it kinda reminded you of Spelling whilst you were zoinking her every which way but lose?



01st June 2005 - 03:40:43 PM
14066 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, Remember when Lisa, Kelly and Jessie got all really drunk at your place and started to get all undressed? Remember how they were all lying your bed, aching to get zoinked by you? Remember how tight Kelly looked, how juicy Lisa looked and how anal Jessie was? Remember how you couldn't get a stiffy? Remember how Kelly asked "I wish slater was here?" Remember how the very mention of the word of Slater got you raging hard? Remember how your pecker burst all over the girls without you even going in? Remember how your premature ejaculation screams were heard by your reclusive Dad? Remember how he came up there and asked what was going on? Remember how you turned up the next day thinking you were the big man on campus for "doing" the three girls? Remember how the girls told everyone over the main school audio system that you were the worst ever lay in history, bar none? Remember how you cried to Belding the next day? Remember how he promised to fix things? Remember how hard he punished your ass? Remember the announcement he made to the school of how good you were? Remember how embrassed you were? Remember how you got beat up by the guys for the lazy gay drunk you are?



01st June 2005 - 03:35:35 PM
14065 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, Remember when you saw an episode of Star Trek:The Next Generation and thought it'd be cool to make your own Data like robot to pleasure you anally? Remember how the actor who played Data found out and sued your pants off literally? Remember how you begged and grovelled at his feet, telling him how you'd do anything rather than get sued? Remember how he disappeared for a few minutes and returned in full Data costume and began to ram your ass with his penis? Remember how painful it was and how you cried? Remember when he quipped, in his data-voice, "I think I just experienced my first emotion?" wiping away the milky dross away from your puny ass?



14052 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech,Remember when Zack and Slater beat you up for no reason? Remember how this happened in every episode? Remember how one time, in music, they stuck a flute up your ass? Remember it was really a clarinet but they didn't care? Remember how you farted and it started playing music? Remember when Zack heard it and thought it would be a good intro into the rather lame Minni Vanilli rip-off band Zack Attack? Remember how every episode you'd hear that fart on the loudspeakers and get the runs? Remember how you'd run to Casey Kasem asking him to clean your butt? Remember how he said no way but did it anyway? Remember how he used to stick up a microphone up your butt and it was live? Remember how you farted and it was broadcast around the world? Remember how it caused the breakup of Zack Attack, costing Zach and Slater millions? Remember how Zach/Slater were pissed off and decided to beat you up, again? Remember how awful you felt when they bought the copyrights and made millions on ebay on your runnings?



01st June 2005 - 12:29:29 PM
14051 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, Remember that time when you dressed up as Robocop? Remember how Zack tried to get you to date his Fridge? Remember how there wasn't a metal part to cover your penis, but loved sticking it into things? Remember how one time Zach and Slater got together to get you to stick it in a dating lottery machine - promising it would make it land on a certain number. Remember how they didn't tell you that you were the prize? Remember how that black chess guy with the crocky voice won? Remember how he took you outback to play with your Robocop dick? Remember how he stuck it in a blender and switched it, ripping it off and showed it to the science class the next morning claiming it to be an alien fetus? Boy, you sure were stupid in those days.



01st June 2005 - 12:19:20 PM
14050 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, Remember when you had to stand in for David Hasselhoff for an episode of Knight Rider, and you thought it would be cool to drive to school with the obviousily gay KITT? Remember how every cool Jock used to drive a KITT replica to school and you thought it would make you cool? Remember how the jocks were secretly gay and the KITT replicas were a symbol of this? Remember how they forced you to suck KITTs exhaust pipe to the utter delight of KITT? Remember how KITT spewed oil into your mouth and all over your body? Remember how you choked on the fluid but couldn't help sticking your dick into the exhaust (to find out what it felt like) Remember how Hasselhoff caught you with your pants down pleasuring his on-screen partner and systematically beat you up then forced you to cum into his mouth? Remember how you thought this would be a great way to get onto Baywatch and be around all those red shorts... remember how you enjoyed watching Hasselhoff run in slow motion? Remember how you badly you came?



01st June 2005 - 12:13:15 PM
14049 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, Remember when Zack told you to be his drug courier for the episode where Jessie got hooked on no doz? Remember how you asked "where am I gonna put it?" - Remember how Zack plundered your tight gay ass and rammed up a few G's up there for safe keeping - remember how he dumped you in Columbia - having to orally and anally pleasure the local townspeople to strike a big score with the local drugs baron - remember how when you finally got back into the states you were probed for hours on end by US Customs but found nothing? Remember how Zack paid you $1 for your trouble and sent you back to Columbia to get more? Remember how insulted you were at being paid $1 and decided to set up your own drug ring yourself? Remeber how, though, that it ended in tragedy when Zack paid a Greek "hitman" to "do" you for the next 3 months repeatedly in the ass? Remember how good it felt? Remember how you broke Zack's drug ring by telling Belding and the press? Remember how he was on it and raped you for telling?



01st June 2005 - 12:04:57 PM
14048 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, Remember the time when you had to dress up as an Alien to get the school into the press and to help Zach make money? Remember that evil FBI/CIA guy who wanted to take you away to be probed and analyzed by the USA's best? Remember how you really, really wanted to go - but Zach et al wouldn't let you? Remember how the FBI guy used to hand you secret tapes and his private phone number? Remember how he used to give you information regarding Watergate and gave you the secret code of "Deep Throat"? Remember how some really old guy got all the press? Remember how you contacted the authorities to find out more - but they laughed in your face telling you how he was never an FBI agent? Remember how you later found out he was your long-lost uncle who tried to get it on with you when you were younger? Remember how stupid you felt when you went off with him anyway to find out if you were really an alien and just got a bumfull of navy filf? You sure got screwed that time!



01st June 2005 - 11:57:56 AM
14047 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, Remember the time when you had to dress up as Sineod O Conner? Remember how exicted you were? Remember how you enjoyed being dressed up as a girl in a felt skirt - remember how you jacked off in the girls toilets, but forgot it was the guys toilets? Remember how the guys promptly raped your ass of all its worldly goodness? Remember how you ran off crying into the hands of Tori? Remember how firm her abs were and how prominet her adams apple was? Remember how she asked you to suck on her cock? Remember how it was all filmed on camera and you were the laughing stock of school? You sure got screwed that time!



01st June 2005 - 11:52:25 AM
14046 : RememberWhen
Hey Screech, Remember the episode when Kelly needed help with her homework and she was dating Zack? Remember when Zack got pissed when he found out she was with you night after night, studying into the late nights? Remember how upset he got when he found out she always wore her favorite cheerleading outfit - one she promised only ever to wear for Zack? Remember how fucking pissed off he was when he found her soiled panties in your locker? Remember how Zack got Belding to suspend you from class to be his desk jocky, remember how he used to get you to bend over and take it up the rear - Remember how Zack set about getting the geeky, spot-riddled Chess Club to go against you and lead them into a sneak, night time attack on your home? Remember how they were armed with baseball bats, golf clubs and chess sets? Remember how they snuck in and found you masterbating into Kelly's panties and then beat and raped the sh1t out of you, repeatedly. Remember how Kelly realised you were gay and kicked you in the nuts?



18th May 2005 - 07:31:18 PM
13585 : Fagbusters

I HAVE RETURNED, YOU VILE FUCKING SCUMBAGS.
YOU'VE MANAGED TO OFFEND THE ALMIGHTY AGAIN... IT'S TIME TO TOSS YOUR SALADS WITH HELLFIRE AND BRIMSTONE.

LET'S GET SOMETHING STRAIGHT... OR AS STRAIGHT AS IT CAN GET IN THIS PASTEL-COLORED EQUIVALENT OF A WEST HOLLYWOOD ANAL CUM DUMPSTER.
THE DISGUSTING BEING KNOWN TO THE WORLD (OR AT LEAST THIS ANALLY DILATED ONE) AS "PRINCESS PEUSSIE", WAS ACTUALLY A THIRD-RATE NERD WHO DID TIME IN THE HALLWAYS OF BAYSIDE HIGH UNDER HIS CHRISTIAN NAME OF LESTER POSEY. AS NO CHILD WANTS TO GO THROUGH HIS PUBLIC EDUCATION EXPERIENCE WITH A NAME THAT HAS TEN BILLION POTENTIAL METHODS TO MOCK IT, YOUNG LESTER, WHO DESPITE HIS THIN, NERDY FRAME HAD VERY LITTLE INTELLIGENCE AND WIT TO SPEAK OF, DECIDED TO BESTOW UPON HIMSELF THE QUESTIONABLE CANONIZATION OF "PRINCE", AFTER HIS ALREADY MENTIONED LOVE OF PURPLE RAIN. AND LET US NOT FORGET THE SCENE IN PURPLE RAIN WHERE JEROME TOSSES A CRAZY BITCH INTO A DUMPSTER... A SCENE THAT NOW SCREAMS LIKE AN ANALLY-RAPED TODDLER OF IRONY.

OBVIOUSLY, FAGGOTS, LESTER'S ATTEMPT TO COME UP WITH A SWEET NAME, AND THE ACCOMPANYING EYELINER AND ASCOTS, DIDN'T HAVE THEIR INTENDED RESULTS.
THE BAYSIDE GANG, ONCE THEY FINALLY STOPPED LAUGHING AT "PRINCE'S" SWEET NEW NAME, BEGAN CALLING HIM "PRINCE POSEY", TO SUCH A DEGREE THAT ONE WONDERS IF BEING CALLED "MO-LESTER" WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN SUCH A BAD THING AFTER ALL...
PRINCE POSEY TRIED TO FIGHT BACK... BUT BEING THAT HE HAD A SEVERE SPEECH IMPEDIMENT THAT MADE HIM SOUND LIKE SLOTH FROM THE GOONIES, THAT ROUTE OBVIOUSLY WASN'T GOING TO WORK... AND IT DIDN'T.
ONE DAY, AS PRINCE POSEY WALKED DOWN THE HALLWAY AND SLATER WAS APPROACHING FROM THE OTHER DIRECTION, PRINCE, SEEING THE OBVIOUS SMIRK ON YOUNG A.C.'S FACE, STOPPED, FLIPPED SLATER THE DOUBLE BIRD, AND SCREAMED.
"SLATER RULES FER FUCKING SURE!"
THEN HE TURNED AROUND AND RAN FOR HIS LIFE... BUT SLATER CAUGHT HIM AND SLAPPED THE SHIT OUT OF HIM AND SET HIS ASCOT ON FIRE. MR. BELDING JUST WATCHED, ARMS CROSSED, AND LAUGHED THAT FAMOUS BELDING LAUGH.

WHAT FOLLOWED WAS AN UNPRECEDENTED DELUGE OF ABUSE AND DEGRADATION, WHICH HAS YET TO BE MATCHED, EVEN BY WATCHING "SAVED BY THE BELL:THE NEW CLASS" IN ITS ENTIRETY.

NATURALLY, THERE ARE MANY LEGENDS CONCERNING HIS CASTRATION AT THE HANDS OF HIS FELLOW BAYSIDE HIGH CLASSMATES AND THE SCHOOL'S FACULTY. THE FACTS WILL (HOPEFULLY) BE DEBATED BACK AND FORTH UNTIL THE END OF TIME. THIS ISN'T THAT STORY.
BUT WHAT IS KNOWN IS THAT, FOLLOWING THE SEPARATION OF PRINCE'S "CHURCH AND STATE", HE LAY IN A POOL OF BLOOD (AND ASSUREDLY, OTHER THINGS), SURROUNDED BY A MASS OF HUMANITY, ALL LAUGHING AT HIS CATASTROPHE.
ONE OF THEM BROKE FROM THE CROWD AND APPROACHED HIM, AND SPOKE.
"PRINCE HAS A PUSSY! PRINCESS PUSSY!"
AND THEN, IN A MOCKERY OF THE EX-PRINCE'S SPEECH IMPEDIMENT, THE STUDENT CURSED HIM WITH THE NAME HE WOULD FOREVER CARRY FROM THAT MOMENT.
"PRIIINCEEEESS PEEEUUUSSSSIEEEEE!"

THAT STUDENT'S NAME WAS KURT STEINBERG.

THE END, FAGGOTS. PREPARE TO BURN.



15th May 2005 - 07:09:25 PM
13554 : Maxwell Nerdstrom
Hey Screech, remember the time Mr. Belding came into your class and said he was putting on a magic show, and was looking for an assistant? Remember how overjoyed you were, because you idolized Belding and wanted to spend lots of time with him? Remember how he asked for volunteers to put their hands up, and you puts yours up just as high as you could? Remember how he said 'OK Screech, meet me in the gym after class', and you almost spooged in your pants?

Remember how you went to the gym after class, and Belding was there with Zack and Slater, who he said would be supervising? Remember how you immediately sported an erection when you saw Belding in his magician's tuxedo? Remember how he said it was time for the first trick, and he needed to give you a blindfold? Remember how you were suprised when Zack and Slater grabbed you by the arms and pinned you to the ground? Remember how Belding said he was going to give you a 'chocolate blindfold', and he dropped trow, squatted over your face, and laid a nice meaty log over both of your eyes? Remember how the bacteria from the shit caused your eyes to swell up? Remember how Belding, Slater & Zack said they'd "wash it out" and then pissed all over your face, causing your eyes to swell up so much you couldn't see anything at all?

Remember how, just as you started to get your sight back, you heard a voice say "hey there, snowflake", and you were able to make out Milo the Janitor standing over you? Remember how Belding said "time for Milo to use his magic wand", and as your sight returned, you saw that Milo was sporting an enormous erection, and they had painted the helmet of his penis white, so that it looked like a magic wand? Remember how Milo said "I dunno Belding, it looks like Screech might want to try some 'sword swallowing'" and without warning he thrust his Pringles can-sized cock deep into your mouth? Remember how Belding, Zack and Slater stood there masturbating, and then Slater stuck his dick up Belding's ass, and he bent over, and Zack stuck his dick in his mouth, spit-roasting him? Remember how Milo exclaimed "oh shit, here cum de MAGIC!!!!!" and blew an enormous load down your throat? Remember how Slater, Belding and Zack then proceeded to blow their loads down your throat? Remember how your stomach was so full of jizz you thought it was going to explode, and you passed out? Remember how, when you came to, most of the school was stood around you, pointing and laughing, because I had called them all there to point and laugh at you? LOL!!!!!!1!!

PS fuck off Peussie, you shit-sucking monkey rapist