Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Important Questions for Diamond - Part I

I have written some important and serious questions for Diamond over at the Dustin Diamond Love forum over the past few years, but Diamond has yet to respond to any of these for some unexplained reason:

Posted: Apr 10, 2006
Diamond, is it true that for your 22nd birthday, Belding and you took a tour of San Francisco? Is it also true that Belding would force you into public restroom stalls and then tore off your Zubaz and buttslammed you while making you lick the various HIV+ juices off the toilet seats which hadn't been cleaned for about 15 years?

You haven't been good at answering the questions in this message thread, so I must humbly request that you show some respect for your queer fans by getting back to me quickly.

In case Diamond doesn't get back to me, do any of the other queers who post here know if these allegations are true? I'm dying to know!


Posted: Apr 3, 2006
Diamond, my balls are full of sperm. Let's meet up at a gas station bathroom stall immediately so that you can drain my balls for me! Are you up for that? Thanks buddy!


Posted: Mar 27 2006
Screech, I have a question about the times when Rod Belding visited Bayside. Specifically, did Rod ever give you a reach-around when he pounded his schlong into your ass? Also, did you ever tell him it was ok with you if he ass-slammed you (I would bet that the answer is "no" - that would have taken the fun out of it for Rod)?


Posted: Mar 7, 2006
Diamond, is it true that Belding used to carve swastikas into your queer hairless chest while assraping you?


Posted: Mar 6, 2006
Diamond, is it true that you, Belding, and Tuttle are going to star in a made-for-adult-tv movie, "Brokeback Bayside"???


Posted: Mar 6, 2006
Diamond, is it cool with you if I pick you up after one of your shows and drive you over to a spa? Would you mind if we sat naked in the spa I tied you up with rope so you couldn't get up and leave? Is it also cool if I unleashed an enormous shit in the spa and then got out of the spa and wiped my ass clean with your jew-fro leaving you alone by yourself to sit with my watery waste? Please get back to me soon!


Posted: Feb 22 2006
Diamond, is it true that Mrs. Powers had an affair with Mr. Belding while she was pregnant with you, Screech? Is it also true that the first time you saw Belding's penis was when you were in Mrs. Powers' womb and he had rough sex with her? Is it true that his massive principal schlong almost poked out your eye when you were a tiny growing fetus? Is it true that he trusted himself so forcefully into Mrs. Powers that your fetus self was twisted completely around and Belding splattered his load all over your fetus body? Is it true that the contact between your tiny fetus head and Belding's potent jism somehow caused a mutation in your DNA that resulted in pubic hair growing on your head, eventually resulting in your trademark jew-fro? Please get back to me and let me know what happened.


Posted: Feb 21, 2006
Diamond is it cool with you if we play a queer "fireman" game together? I envision drinking a gallon of Mountain Dew and pretending that your huge gonzo nose is on fire. I will also pretend that my penis is a fire hose and put out the imaginary fire on your nose with my piss. Are you interested? I hope you're thirsty (for my piss)!!! We can also light your nose on fire with a blowtorch if you think that will make things more realistic.


Posted: Feb 13, 2006
Diamond, is it true that the Kennedy family used to pass you around as a gay sex toy? Is it true that Ted Kennedy used to get piss drunk, eat some Taco Bell, and then unleash a drunken spray of smelly diarrhea all over your face and jew-fro? Is it also true that were were under John F. Kennedy Jr.'s desk sucking him off all of those times that he failed the NY Bar exam, and that he was butt-slamming you right before his plane crashed down in 1999 and that you narrowly cheated death by jumping out at the last second with a parichute? Is it also true that you were bare-ass naked as you parachuted to the ground and suffered a painful burning on your skin due to the air resistance and that you punctured your hairless nut-sack when you landed in a tree with pointy branches?


Posted: Feb 7, 2006
Diamond, is it true that when Belding took you, Slater, Zack, and Mr. Tuttle to the L.A. Zoo you were really looking forward to seeing the giant sea turtle? Is it also true that Slater told you he had a "turtlehead" in his pants? Is it true that he then pulled down his pants and showed you the shit-turtlehead sticking out of his butthole and then made you eat it?


Posted: Jan 24, 2006
Diamond, where does Belding rest his lit doobie when he's ass-raping you? Does he stick it in your jew-fro?


Posted: Jan 6, 2006
Diamond, is it cool with you if I take a huge Taco Bell shit in a bag of little chocolate donuts and then make you eat all of the shit-covered donuts while jagging you in the ass with a baseball bat?


Posted: Jan 4, 2006
Diamond, is it cool with you if I have sweaty unprotected buttsex with some random dude at a rest stop "gloryhole" and then drive over to your place and make you lick that dude's shit off my cock? This is a very serious question and I would greatly appreciate your prompt response.


Posted: Jan 3, 2006
Screech, remember when you contracted all of those STDs from Belding, Tuttle, Dewey, James the Actor, Max, Slater, and Zack's dad from all of the times that they ass-raped you against your will? Does it bother you knowing that that none of them ever gave you a reach-around while defiling you? Does it piss you off that your mom, Mrs. Powers, never believed you when you told her that you were a victim of homosexual rape because she just assumed that you were a flaming queer? Please contact me to discuss.


Posted: Dec 19, 2005
Diamond, is it cool with you if I eat some burritoes and then take a huge Taco Bell shit in your frying pan? Also, would you mind if I heat the shit up on your stove and made you inhale the fumes of my frying shit? Would it also be ok if, after heating up the shit, I left the stove on "high," forced your face into the flame to ignite your neatly trimmed beard, and then left the flame on until your house burned down? Please contact me to discuss and let me know if you are "hip" to my plan.

P.S. Which would technically be considered to be more "flaming," your stove or you?


Posted: Dec 19, 2005
Diamond, is it cool with you if I take a huge shit on your chin and then scoop up the shit with a spoon and lodge all of it up into your nostrils? Also, would you mind if I teabag you after my shit hardens inside of your nose, making it impossible for you to breathe from your nose? Please get back to me immediately, as this is a serious and important question!


Posted: Dec 15, 2005
Diamond, is it cool with you if I heat up some hot bacon grease in a frying pan and fire it right in your face and then smack you in the face with the pan? Would you mind if I dumped a gallon of boiling hot water on your tiny cock and balls and then stuck a couple Barbie Dolls up your ass while my stereo plays the song "Barbie Girl" by Aqua?


Posted: Dec 15, 2005
Diamond, is it cool with you if I stomp on your hairless pre-pubescent nutsack while wearing golf cleats? Also, you you mind if I stick a red-hot fireplace poker up your ass? Please contact me to discuss!


Posted: Dec 12, 2005
Diamond, you can call me "Fred Flintstone," because I will make your "bed rock!!!" Call me, you gay icon!

Do you like fast food? Because I've got a nice big "whopper" in my pants for you! I'll feed it to you rectally!

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