I recently discovered that there are greeting cards being sold by a company entitled, "Fart By Mail." Apparently, customers can purchase a greeting card which emits a fart sound when opened and which also smells like ass! This is a great idea and when Corky finds out about it, he is going to throw A-Rod a beating for missing out on this business opportunity.
Here are a couple videos posted on the Fart By Mail website:
156 comments:
Corky definitely had that idea recently, so A Rod is in for another beating and torn anus. Maybe Corky and Mr. B could disrupt that market by delivering the farts in person. Just imagine paying a service where Mr. B and Corky show up and belch and fart in someone’s face for you? They really should go on Shark Tank with that! Mr. Wonderful would likely get turned on by Corky’s amazing physique, then jizz himself when Mr. B ripped a nasty wet fart in his face!
Boys, good ole Pig Pen sure has a dilemma on his hands. Now I support the truckers convoy. We truckers stick together. I am currently sitting on a load of gay porn I’m supposed to have in San Francisco by Friday. Now I’m against the mask mandates and other mandates as they hinder my ability to party in dumpsters, restrooms, and the vax restrictions have kept me out of Canada until recently! This needs to stop. The issue is I will let down thousands of deranged queers if I don’t deliver this load on time! I’m thinking of hitting up DC to help the convoy. But if I do I won’t make my drop in San Fran! And I’m not just talking porn. I have a few pallets of buttplugs! What should I do boys?
Pig pen…have you ever considered piling all your deranged customers like cattle into one of your trucks and let them join the convoy? That way your customers will realise their dream of being in a closed container full of buttslamming and the smell of anus being magnified, whilst also enjoying the gay porn AND accompanying you to Canada for what surely would be one of the wildest dumpster orgies on earth?
Just think, you could also put cameras on the floor of the truck containers and get a nice show yourself? If there’s no space, you can even attach trailers onto the back of the truck so your customers can have some open air action as well! I’d charge for this
Corky found out about these greeting cards the other day. A-Rod was terrified that Corky would kick his ass but was relieved when Corky said what a great idea it was. Corky then added that he thought it would be cool if you could open a greeting card in which Screech is inside the card. Corky also said that people receiving the card would then rub the card against their asses and then the Screech would say "Zoinks!"
A-Rod replied that it was yet another stupid idea from Corky. A-Rod pointed out that Screech is dead and that the Screech clones are stuck on Mars. A-Rod also said that Screech would be far too large to fit into a tiny card and envelope. Corky got angry and slapped A-Rod in the face and told him he was a dirty Mexican. A-Rod replied that he was Dominican, not Mexican, as he has previously told Corky about a hundred times. Corky then punched A-Rod in the balls and said that obviously a full size Screech wouldn't fit into the card. Corky also said that it would be a miniature Screech. Corky also said that by mass producing the cards, A-Rod could save money on the cloning and shrinking of the Screeches. Corky additionally said that people would pay extra for these cards because the mini Screech inside could be inserted into people's asses for sex reasons. A-Rod replied that the mini Screeches would need to be fed food. Corky said that the mini Screeches would eat a steady diet of farts and pee. A-Rod then said that even among 'tards, Corky was an idiot. A-Rod also said that Corky should shut his mouth and pull down his pants and diaper so that he could fondle Corky's enormous dong. Corky then flew into a 'tard rage after hearing A-Rod's rude comments and viciously ass-raped A-Rod while Mr. Belding ate three pizzas and took a huge dump into A-Rod's underwear drawer in his dresser!
Did you guys see this?
https://www.findagrave.com/memorial/8010480/fred-berry
I have an idea that would make queer for Screech fans rejoice. I believe we need to get some of Screech’s ashes from that stupid girl that somehow got some. Then we need to give Screech a proper memorial, so that we grieving queers have a place to congregate and remember our gay icon. For the headstone I got some great ideas from Re-Run. The picture used would be that hot pic of Screech saying “Anal Sex is Hot”. His middle name would be replaced with Screech. And at the bottom it would say “Zoinks”. Maybe we could have it made from petrified feces or something. Just imagine a queer Mecca that would surround Screech’s grave! Mr. B and Corky would likely show up regularly as well! What do you guys think?
Gary, Corky’s idea is fantastic! I would pay big bucks for a mini Screech I could fart on and shove up my ass! I’m sure millions of other raging queers would as well! Just imagine making Screech be an alarm clock, and waking you by yelling “Zoinks”. You could then flick him across the room with a finger, or wipe boogers on him! I would make mini Screech tongue my butthole every time I took a dump. A Rod is so disrespectful to Corky, and deserved both Corky’s beating and Mr. B’s shit in his underwear drawer. Thank goodness Corky has Mr. B with him to offer his support.
Actually, after reading some of the demented comments that some of you retarded weirdos have been posting in here, I think that I need a drink, & you need a shrink - That's what I think!!! peace.
Penis-Face, we are now the normal people in President Biden’s country. Thankfully he has made it so that wanting to squat down and rip ass in another man’s face, while he tounges your butthole is more normal then not wanting to do so! Your comment is likely being investigated by numerous agencies right now. Expect a knock on your door tomorrow and a long jail term for your hate crime. I’ll be out trying to steal Screech’s ashes so I can make my dream of having a queer Screech shrine a reality.
Barf, I expect If you keep your eye on eBay that girl will post them there for a few bucks any day now. Hopefully she hasn’t already traded Screech for a few nickels or crack rocks.
Ralph I wish you never said that…I just typed in ‘screech saved by the bell’ on eBay and blew my 100k of saving and S&P 500 stocks on screech funky pop dolls, trading cards and t shirts on the hotly contested auction for at!
There are some particular spankworthy signed trading cards and one of Mike Rodger’s in acid washed designs where you can see the full package!
Penis-Face, take your hate somewhere else. The gay community will tolerate your anti-gay agenda. Just because many of the regular posters here read the comments with our pants down while rubbing one out doesn’t make us bad people or “weirdo.” The mere thought of a middle-aged ‘tard like Corky using A-Rod as a sex slave is a huge turn on to the regulars. If you take issue with this, please return to one of your Nazi websites
My lover and I were reading posts on this website while jerking each other off yesterday. I hope you guys continue posting hot fantasies. My nuts are completely drained right now
Oh Yeah?.. well I'll take my f**kin' hate somewhere else, all right - Along with my hate-paste.. RIGHT UP YOUR ASS!!!... hahaha!!!
Full Disclaimer:I am in no way affiliated with piss-face but his opinions do somewhat reflect my views - Sincerely, Penis-Face
Piss-Face, that kind of dirty talk about ass play will go a long way in here. Let’s hook up! I’d like to shit in your mouth, before loosening up your anus with a 2x4. Then a band of about 25 deranged homeless dudes will run a train on your gaping asshole! I bet you’re jizzing yourself already just thinking about this amazing offer! Let me know when we can make this happen!
Piss-Face, your dirty talk is turning me on! Pencil me in for a 2AM rimjob in the men’s room at the Taco Bell on 5th street! We’ll have a cock sword-fight first and then I will sit on your face and drop ass while you tongue my anus! I’m sure you will blow your load when my stinky warm and wet fart hits your nose like a freight train!!!
Last night Corky ordered deep dish pizzas for dinner which he ate with his best friend, Mr. Belding. He and Mr. B also each drank several 2-liters of Mountain Dew. After eating dinner, Mr. Belding felt sick and went to bed early. Corky, on the other hand, locked himself in the den and watched old WWF wrestling matches from the 1980s for a couple hours. While watching the wrestling, Corky was constantly ripping ass as a result of all of the pizza and and soda he had consumed. After a couple hours, the den reeked of the smell of ‘tard anus. Corky ran to go find A-Rod and told him how he had farted in the den for two hours straight and now that room was really smelly. Corky assumed that A-Rod would be proud of him for stinking up the den and would quickly lock himself in the den to smell the stench. Instead, A-Rod told Corky that he was disgusting and that civilized people didn’t behave like this. A-Rod also said they nobody wanted to smell the stench of the den and that Corky should open a window to let some fresh air in. A-Rod also told Corky that was disgusting. Corky was outraged at A-Rod’s rude comments and punched A-Rod in the balls! Corky then grabbed A-Rod by the ear and pulled A-Rod’s head down next to Corky’s ass and ripped a nasty fart in A-Rod’s face. A-Rod then fell over and started flopping around on the floor while jizzing his pants in exquisite homosexual pleasure! Corky told A-Rod his was a dirty faggot and then ass-raped A-Rod to teach him a lesson!!
Wow, there are some Uber-hot posts here! Thanks guys, I’ve been rubbing my crotch all night reading the queer fantasies. I want A-Rod to crawl underneath my nude body so that his balls go through my legs. Then he will start licking my butthole whilst giving me a reach-around. I will fart in his face just for fun and will “accidentally” release a diarrhea spray into his mouth. I shall conclude this encounter with hard anal. After I’m done, Wade Boggs will spit chewing tobacco into A-Rod’s ass crack!
Today Corky woke up to find A Rod sharing the top bunk with him. He grew angry when he realized A Rod had his hands down the front of Corky’s pajamas and was fondling his massive dong. A Rod was also spooning up against Corky’s bubble butt! Corky immediately took action and donkey kicked A Rod in the balls, causing him to fly off the top bunk and land on the ground next to Mr. B with a thud and a groan. Mr. B awoke at this and was annoyed, so he rolled over to aim his ass at A Rod’s head and ripped an enormous 17 second fart. Once the stench hit him A Rod began flopping around like a fish out of water and jizzed his Brooks Brothers pajamas. I find A Rod’s sexual harassment of Corky worse then Putin invading Ukraine!
Today Corky and Mr. B were watching news about the war in Ukraine. Corky said he liked the Ukrainian people and wished he could go “full ‘tard” on the Russians. A Rod walked in during this and Corky informed A Rod that since Mr. B was a bit too old, and he was far too lovable, A Rod needed to head to Ukraine to get a gun and go fight a Russian tank. He said A Rod was always telling tales about his athletic abilities and he could prove them to everyone by dodging Russian bullets, grenades, and bombs. Mr. B let loose a nice 9 second belch in approval. A Rod said he had no interest in fighting for Ukraine and wouldn’t Corky be sad if he got hurt or died? Corky stood up at this and said no, he wouldn’t be sad, he then karate chopped A Rod in the throat and called him a commie lover. He then strangled A Rod with his filthy diaper while mangling the “Star Spangled Banner”, before giving A Rod some rough anal. After jizzing on A Rod he called him Commie trash and started flexing while yelling “USA, USA”. He and Mr. B then left A Rod laying in a heap while they went off to get some brownies and watch Rocky IV. I’m hopeful we will soon see A Rod on CNN fellating a Ukrainian bum while also dodging explosions.
It would be pretty funny if A Rod headed to Ukraine and joined their military. Many times troops have picture of their wives or girlfriends and share them with each other. A Rod would pull out a picture of Corky!
Mr. Belding would be a tremendous asset to any army if there was a parachute strong enough to support his massive weight. Can you imagine him jumping out of an airplane and eating pizza and cake as free falls to earth? He would rip powerful farts while falling which would paralyze enemy forces! He would also leave garbage and food crumbs everywhere. I envision him eating a Papa John's pizza while hurdling to earth and then dropping the box when his parachute opens - whomever on earth gets hit in the head with the pizza box would be in for a rude awakening!
I could also see Corky tandem jump with A-Rod. Corky would strangle A-Rod with a dirty diaper in mid-air and ass-rape A-Rod during free-fall. Enemy troops would see this hot display and would jerk off so vigorously that they forget that they are fighting a war!
Ass Breath, that would be so homoerotic if A Rod and Corky jumped out of a plane together in a tandem jump. I’m wondering if that might even surpass the eroticism of Mr. Belding and Screech’s tandem bike ride. The one that ended then falling off their bike, and Screech winding up with a torn anus? Russian troops are known to be pretty fruity and would definitely focus their gaze skyward to watch Corky really pound A Rod’s anus while simultaneously strangling him with a filthy diaper. I’m certain the parachute would go wildly off course and likely crash into something hysterical. It would be great if they landed on a Russian tank and Corky plugged the barrel of the gun by taking a nasty dump into it. This could be a fantastic idea if somehow it was coordinated with the Ukrainian military! If they could avoid being entranced by the homoerotic scene they could spring a surprise attack while the Russians were looking skyward and vigorously jerking off! Once Corky landed he would turn into a raging ‘tard fighting machine. He’d be shitting everywhere and no one would dare try and hurt him as he’s just too darn lovable!
I want to fart in A Rod’s face. I saw him eating at Panera Bread by himself yesterday. I went and stood by him and pushed as hard as I could to rip a fart, but my ass let me down big time. I was so discouraged. I worship people like Mr. Belding who can rip ass on demand. I feel like such a loser. Is there anything I can do to help my farting prowess? Next time I see A Rod I want to crop dust him.
A couple nights ago, Corky wore one of A-Rod’s jock straps and nothing else. When he walked into the kitchen, A-Rod was staring at Corky’s massive bulge. Corky saw A-Rod staring at him and said that A-Rod was jealous of his perfect body. A-Rod asked Corky what the hell he was talking about and pointed out that Corky was obese and had a big fat belly from all of the junk food he eats with Mr. Belding. A-Rod then started fondling Corky’s enormous dong. After 15 seconds of groping, A-Rod realized that Corky’s ass was completely exposed in the back of the jock strap. A-Rod asked Corky to go put on a diaper before he makes a mess on the floor. Corky was angry at A-Rod for that comment and for groping his junk. Corky got even by opening the refrigerator door and spraying diarrhea into it! When A-Rod protested, Corky viciously ass-raped him to teach him a lesson!!
Steve Anus, that is one erotic story. I think I speak for all deranged queer men that I would treat Corky like the God he is. Why is A Rod always so concerned about Corky wearing his diaper? I can only imagine how hot Corky looked wearing just a jock strap. A Rod is always so entranced by Corky’s monster schlong, but doesn’t seem to appreciate the rest of Corky’s amazing physique. He constantly puts Corky down, and although Corky has been potty training acts like there could be a shit explosion at any second. Corky certainly has control enough to be able to open the fridge and fire a diarrhea spray all over it. Corky was right to react to A Rod’s abuse with that shit spray and anal pounding!
With people buying stuff like NFT’s and other fake crap I wonder if there is a market for Mr. B’s pee stained underwear, Corky’s diapers, or maybe a shit log from one of them? I’m guessing many deranged queers would love to have a memento like this. I also think they best buds should start up a phone service kinda of like cameo. But they would call you, or someone you told them to call, to rip farts and belch into the phone. That would be so amazing. I’d love to pay to have Mr. B call me and treat me to a ripe fart! What do you guys think? I’m hoping Corky sees this and demands A Rod fund this can’t miss business!
Spork, A-Rod has been telling Corky that he needs to get in better shape and that he’s too fat. He’s also been lecturing Corky on the importance of eating healthy fresh vegetables, fruit, and other foods. The other day he was telling Corky this whole Corky and Mr. Belding were chowing down on Doritos, cake, and jumbo hot dogs while watching cartoons. Corky got mad because A-Rod was distracting him while he was trying to watch an episode of Thundercats. After A-Rod finally left the room, Mr. Belding told Corky that they needed to get some payback on A-Rod and said that they should go to the bathroom on A-Rod’s food and then A-Rod would understand why it is better to eat junk food than healthy food. Mr. B then belched to motivate Corky to get up off the couch. They went into the kitchen and Mr. B opened the refrigerator door and then suggested that it would be cool if Corky and he had a farting contest into the refrigerator! Corky said that was a great idea. Mr. B went first and ripped a 15-second fart into the refrigerator which caused a head of fresh lettuce to quickly turn from fresh and green to brown and rotten within seconds! Then Corky pulled down his diaper and sprayed diarrhea all over the refrigerator shelves!! Mr. B laughed and then reminded Corky that he was only supposed to fart, not go dookie! He and Corky laughed and laughed for the next 30 seconds. Mr. B then told Corky he was glad that they were best buddies and then said that they should go into A-Rod’s bedroom and pee in the sock drawer on A-Rod dresser! Corky said that was a great idea and then asked if they could also open A-Rod’s closet and take dumps on the floor. Mr. Belding said that was a brilliant idea and that they could wipe their asses with A-Rod’s silk pillowcases when they were done! Corky and Mr. Belding truly are the best buddies in the world!!
Direct feed from the latest C-Pac conference: "My fellow Republicans, a very little known & highly under-publized truth about this latest stolen election, that the dems would also like to quickly & conveniently sweep right under the rug just like everything else they screw up, is that, when all of the votes are properly audited and counted, it will be (justly) determined that 4 out of every five menopausal old white republican males occasionally suffers from bouts of cramping and explosive diarreah in their golden years but that, conversely speaking, that must logically mean that one of these five fellows actually enjoys it!.. (p.s. my wife heidi is hot..)
Yesterday night Corky walked into the bathroom while A-Rod was taking a shower. Corky opened the shower door and then ripped ass and quickly closed the shower door. A-Rod uttered, “Zoinks!” while Mr. Belding laughed and ate spoonfuls of chocolate cake frosting from a can. Mr. Belding then unleashed a 15-second belch to show his support for Corky’s fart. Corky then opened the shower door and told A-Rod that he had a tiny baby dick, unlike the massive dongs of he and his best friend, Mr. Belding. Corky also said that the stupid health food A-Rod eats obviously is why A-Rod’s peepee was so small. Mr. Belding pointed out that A-Rod’s steroid use also shrank his cock and then farted. Corky the pulled down his pants and diaper to reveal his enormous cock which dangled down by his knees. Mr. B did the same, revealing his huge cock and enormous belly. A-Rod told them to pull up their pants and said they were a couple of faggots. Corky then raped A-Rod for calling him a faggot while Mr. B ate a large box of donuts!
I’m one of the few who refused to believe that a rod was capable of cheating on Corky until I heard a story doing the rounds on a well known retro gamers group chat.
Apparently, when corky was out, A Rod approached Mr B who was swimming in his full sized garden pool with armbands on and asked if he ‘could help teach him some wrestling moves’ he ‘could surprise’ his lover with and begged to learn the tombstone manoeuvre. Apparently, all this time he was speaking he was leering at The Big Boppers huge bulge and undercarriage.
Mr B readily agreed as it would help his friend and acted out A Rods demands to tombstone him ‘eight or 9 times’. What the Big Bopper didn’t know however though was that with each tombstone, A Rod was burying his nose into his crotch and cleft of his bumhole and inhaling deeply each time!
Yeah, whatever.. fuckin' cottage cheese-ass lookin' bitch..
Guys, I asked for help with my farting prowess and no one answered! Now I blew another chance to fart on A Rod. Today I was at a Mobil station in Miami and A Rod was there buying a Snapple. I maneuvered myself near him and grunted and strained to release a fart. But my ass once again had stage fright! A Rod just gave me an odd look and went off to pay for his drink. The only positive was that I did see Corky and Mr. Belding in A Rod’s Bentley. Corky was yelling at A Rod to hurry his ass up as they were hungry and needed to get to Pizza Hut. I then saw Corky open the glove box and take a dump in it as A Rod rushed out to the car. But Man I do need tips on how to have on demand farts like you studs!
BallWhipper that is scandalous! I can only imagine the look of sleazy joy on his face as he was turned upside down, held vicelike between the Big Boppers sweaty brown stained thighs and repeatedly tombstoned!
I wonder what other wrestling moves have been used for fruity purposes? I remember once seeing some unlucky dude on the receiving end of Rey mysterioso hurricanrana once and he instantly lost his load
Burt….have you ever tried using a funnel up your ass? You attach the pipe to your brown eye then put the funnel bit near to his face whilst he is not looking then spear one out…it allows more air to pass through and if he is looking you will Give him a pebbledashing
Burt’s comment made me think there could be a real money making opportunity here. There are millions of deranged queers like him, and the vast majority are unhappy with their current farting, and diarrhea abilities. Imagine if there were training classes across the country, with a heavy focus on the queerest areas? People like John Pepperoni, Steve Anus, and Mr. Belding amongst many other of our heroes could train people to learn their craft. I see it resembling a karate dojo, with a tiered system as students moved up in skills. Hurt, I bet you’d pay good money to have a real professional teaching you how to fart like a champion. I could easily see this being larger then karate studios in the US with farting schools in every strip mall across the country! What does everyone think? I’m hoping Corky or Mr. B sees this and gets A Rod to invest!
Karl, i see the advantages of this, especially with international competitions...Do you think the US would have what it takes to beat the Mexican and Canadian national teams?
Also, to combined two threads into one here...is there also scope to introduce some wrestling maneouvres into this ancient japanese art of fart aikido?
Imagine contacts with traditional karate farting techniques, and hulk hogans leg drop of doom? (which incidentally was created when Hulk oversaw one bum perform the move whilst farting and crashing down on another dudes eye.
Also, wasnt this a martial art that Frank Dux and Steven Seagal once endorsed?
Just a teaser here guys. The new season of SBTB on the ISS is well under way. We are thinking of renaming it SBTB on Mars, as much if this seasons action will take place on Mars with the Screech clones. Anyhow, I wanted to tickle your fancy by letting you know we’ve secured big cat fan, and demented queer, Joe Exotic as a special guest star. We had to negotiate for months with the bureau of prisons but we got him! We can’t wait to release new episodes soon!
Karl, if you re able to get those farting, and diarrhea schools up and running while incorporating UBO’s marital arts ideas NBC would be very interested in producing a “Cobra Kai” like show. Our research has shown that the viewing public is sick of young, and in shape people doing karate, and would prefer to see out of shape, obese dudes, in their 50’s to 80’s gorging on child dogs and other greedy foods, then farting on each other. Make this happen guys, and it’s the next SBTB on the ISS. I’ve already set aside a $1,500 budget for this!
Buttsucker, it’s polite when trying to schedule a “pencil me in” to offer a few times and places you will be available for hot man action. Or, You could just hit up any rest area, or truck stop bathroom. Without doing those basic things you have a low chance of success.
(Doing my best jim carrey dumb and dumber impression) "So you're sayin' there's a chance.. ;) "
I was at the gym the other day when someone turned the tv near me to CNN. It was both awful and weird. I was in the middle of a treadmill run and was really hauling ass, so I couldn’t stop and change the channel. After a news segment went to break, everything quickly got weird. There was a Taco Bell commercial where a customer kept farting and belching while eating tacos- when he got up to throw out his garbage, he ripped ass in some other dude’s face! Apparently this type of commercial plays well to the CNN audience. I also saw a commercial for Ford trucks where Mr. Belding was test-driving a truck with Corky and they had a belching contest while throwing garbage out the windows while driving on the highway - how exactly does a commercial like that make anyone want to purchase a truck???
Gary, apparently that truck is an EV, and that makes it ok to toss all your trash on the road. When you aren’t polluting from the tailpipe liberals feel it’s ok to throw trash on the roads to not only show how progressive and better you are then people who don’t drive EV’s, but to also let people know to follow you to the next Rest stop for some hot man action while you’re truck recharges! I believe the Biden admin used taxpayer dollars to fund that Ford commercial!
I can support Rat Fart’s story. Last week I was in DC and was following a hot pink Tesla with the license plate BUTPLG, when all of sudden the driver through a bag of Taco Bell, and a bag of McDonalds trash out the window. It made an enormous mess on the road. I was pretty sure that was a sign so I followed him to a gas station, where I saw him run into the bathroom. When I entered my bathroom to my surprise I found Pete Buttieieg! He immediately ripped my dong out of my pants and the next thing I knew I was buttslamming him against a filthy urinal! He begged me to flush the urinal as I shoved his head under the water. After I jizzed on him he got on all fours like a dog, lifted his leg, and ripped a little fart. He then began sniffing my ass and I let loose a nice blast that knocked him over backwards. He began jizzing wildly while I washed up and got out of there. It was very erotic. Be on the sign for this how new queer hookup signal!
Last night Mr. Belding had horrible diarrhea after gorging on tacos for lunch and deep dish pizzas for dinner. At around 10 pm, Mr. B rushed to the bathroom to expel the contents of his bowels. As he sat down and repeatedly loudly farted and sprayed diarrhea, A-Rod heard the noise and snuck into the bathroom. A-Rod then started jerking off while listening to Mr. B fill up the toilet with his diseased feces. Corky was walking down the hallway looking for his best friend when he opened the bathroom door and caught A-Rod pleasuring himself. Corky was disgusted that A-Rod was such a faggot! Corky then ass-raped A-Rod to teach him a lesson!
A Rod is a deviant that only Hunter Biden can compare to. Mr. B was suffering from gastrointestinal distress, and A Rod took advantage of that to get off, and jerk his tiny cock. I’m so happy Corky found him and taught him a lesson!
NBC executive. The ‘buff stud plus’ package on spice is getting stale as it is the same old sbtb, life goes on and ISS ARod lead SBTB revival runs. It even had some ‘classic’ games from A Rods baseball career as well which ruined my buzz. I pay 29 dollars a month for this!
There is a gap in the market. Have you ever considered reprising the ‘too hot for tv’ Forever Friends show with corky and the demasi twins, Screech’s ‘insurance king’ commercials, his celebrity fit club appearances or the first few seasons of home improvements? I heard there was once a scene where Tim gave Albert a polish bikeride during an episode of ‘tool time’ I can only imagine how your prime time viewing figures would look!
What do you say Mr. Exec?
Hey everyone. Joe B here to ask for your help. As you may be aware we have having an energy crisis. Now I had nothing to do with it, but I need to solve it. Instead of reaching out to CEOks of large oil companies to see what we could do, I’ve instead been here reading these hot posts! It also gave me an idea. A fart powered car! I think farts are combustible, my son Hunter, who is the smartest guy I know, used to light them on fire and send me videos. Now I want the deranged queer community to retrofit their cars so that the occupants can eat fast food and rip ass to power their cars. We will call these cars Biden mobiles, and soon everyone will be Ridin’ with Biden! Let me know your thoughts. I told my wife about this idea and she kicked me in the balls and called me a faggot. I think that’s a good sign!
Ass Hawk, right now I am ensuring Russia cannot watch old episodes of Punky Brewster. They don’t deserve Punky, and it’s how NBC is standing with the Ukrainian people. The Buff Stud package has some hot Easter eggs, and every show is chosen with care. Those old A Rod baseball games have post game “shower action”. In one Derek Jeter urinates on A Rod in the shower, while Mariano Rivera shits on A Rod’s foot. That alone is worth $29 a month! But don’t worry, beyond that new programming will be hitting the airwaves soon.
NBC Exec,, I salute you for doing your bit. My friend works at Warner and he also took the painful decision to stop pressing Salty and the Pocketknifes' eponymous album in Russia. Apparently, its limited run EP which had 'red panties', 'senor gonzo' and 'rim goblin' on it sold over 12 million copies and launched an absolutely rabid ass play scene that the Government had to clamp down!
I hear you on the Buff Stud package, but i am talking about the stud plus package which costs 5 dollars more. Why did you show the whole match, rather than the erotic pissing session at the end? take tonight for example. Its got a re-run over SBTB Hawaiian Style, then straight after there is another screening of the film with 'cast commentary' included. After that it is a crappy late season episode of home improvement that is only rated '15' then finally an 'at home with the Rodriguezs' which is soft core of A-Rod and the best buds at best.
I am thinking of cancelling tomorrow morning unless you can persuade me that the new programming will hit the mark. I await your response eagerly.
Joe Biden thank you for doing an amazing job. I converted my pink Geo Metro to run on farts today to support Ukraine. I merely hooked a plastic tube to the gas tank, sealed it up, and put a nozzle to insert into my ass on the other end. Then my lover Pepe and I went out for a drive. We could only hit a top speed of about 6 miles an hour on our way to Taco Bell as we barely had any farts. People were beeping and yelling, and a guy through a bag of feces at us when he passed us. But we just yelled. “Ridin’ With Biden” at them to show our patriotic spirit which showed them! At Taco Bell I had about 14 soft shell tacos, a mega burrito, a Baja blast drink, and some cinnamon twists. My lover had the same. Within minutes I had both heinous gas, and we held hands as we skipped out to our car. We then took turns sticking the nozzle up our asses and filling up the tank with farts. Some haters with a little kid yelled at us, but we yelled back “Ridin’ With Biden” which confused and likely humiliated them for their hateful comments. After ripping dozens of farts we jumped in the car and what was an empty tank was now nearly 1/4 full! I was able to get the car up to almost 15mph on the way home, but the car did sputter a few times, and stalled once. I think that will improve as the engine gets used to running on farts. For a mere $40 in Taco Bell food we helped save the environment and bring down the gas prices! If everyone does the same we could be green by tomorrow! Thanks again Joe, I’m off to buttslam Pepe while we watch the episode of Mr. Belvedere where Mr. Belvedere is Kevin’s prom date!
NBC, i hear you and i understand you are doing your bit. Right now, i have a friend at Warner who has just had to pause operations in Russia. Apparently Salty and the Pocketknife had a retrospective EP out which had 'rim goblin', 'red panties' and 'senor gonzo; n it that went quintuple platinum in a week in Russia! He said tons of horny young men had been buying the tracks even though the government were trying to crack down on this queer scene!
However NBC Executive, i have to tak umbrage at your offering - i am talking about the buff stud plus package here which is 5 dollars more than the standard price. How can you justify 3 hours of a 7 year old ball game before 1 minutes fo wild shower scene antics?! Take last nights schedule for example, You showed SBTB Hawaiian Style (again) then played it again JUST AFTER with cast commentary. You then went straight into a later season episode of Home Improvements with only some soft core action and then had an entertainment piece on Spike from the Buffy Vampire slayer, that had a small segment on him showing off his underpants. Even the centrepiece which was an admittedly hot episode of forever friends with Corky dressed as Elvis, grinding up against audience members was not an exclusive.
Why arent you producing new shows? I am sure there are many on here who are with me as well - i demand to know what new shows you are delivering before i cancel my subscription outright!
Ass Hawk, this weekend we will have a live belching and farting contest being held in Abu Dhabi. The farting contest will have special guest star Christopher Castile, who played nerdy Mark Foster on “Step by Step”. He will huff each contestants farts directly from their anus, and will give the winner a lovely rimjob. This is an example of how we are branching out to other cultures. Each contestant will gorge themselves on greasy kebabs, and other middle eastern junk food to produce nasty farts. I hope you enjoy it!
Ass Hawk, that is amazing if true about the salty renaissance. I always thought Eastern Europe was 20 years behind in terms of US culture, so as we are now enjoying Lil Yachty, they are still getting hot over Fred durst, the dudes in Gilmore girls and salty and the pocketknife.
Do you know what the scene is like out there? Are there many dressing up as the band members and creating fruity queercore bands of their own?
Last night, A-Rod was sitting on his couch watching a basketball game when Corky pulled down his sweatpants and diaper and started jerking off. Corky stood up on the couch and positioned himself so that his giant cock was mere inches from A-Rod’s face. A-Rod asked Corky what the hell he was doing and said to leave him alone. He also told Corky to go watch cartoons in another room and to stop bothering him. Corky had assumed that A-Rod would enjoy watching Corky jerk off in his face and was outraged at A-Rod’s terse response. Corky got really mad and turned around while standing on the couch and pretended like he was stepping down off the couch. However, as Corky turned around, his ass was about eight inches from A-Rod’s face and then Corky ripped s heinous-smelling fart, causing A-Rod to utter “Zoinks!” and lean back onto the couch while gasping for fresh air! Corky then proceeded to jerk off in A-Rod’s face and jizzed on his head! Corky then kicked A-Rod in the balls before farting in A-Rod’s face again. Corky then went into the kitchen and drank chocolate milk while watching Sesame Street!
NBC Exec, that belcging abs farting contest show sounds awesome! Back when there were only three major tv networks, the networks would show special such as “Battle of the Network Stars” abs other crap like that. I’m glad NBC has evolved its programming to the point at which rim jobs are performed by washes up former child stars. If Screech was still alive, he’d be the go-to has-been for stuff like this. Have you considered upping the ante and having the guy who played the little boy on Who’s the Boss lick the buttholes of the contestants? That guy has AIDS and is a raging homosexual now.
I saw A Rod again at a record store. He just collect vinyl like I do. When I saw him I ran out to my car to get the funnel another poster had recommended. I then returned to the store and stuck the tube in my ass while aiming the funnel at A Rod. He gave me a look and asked if he’d seen me before. By this time I was grunting mightily as I tried squeezing out a fart. Sadly by ass let me down again and A Rod walked off with a Barry Manilow record, leaving me standing there with a tube in my ass, while holding a funnel. I have to say I’m disappointed guys. I need a surefire winner!
Gary, we loved the idea of getting the Who’s the Boss kid and we’ve already contacted him. He will be and fluffier at this years Pepperoni Farting Competition that will be held in Chicago. He said he’d love to huff the masters farts and tongue their buttholes for the cameras. We are trying to get Tony from the show to come as well to see what a deranged faggot Jonathan turned into. It’s sad that the Dad from Alf died or we would be contacting him as well. He could smoke crack, and huff farts simultaneously. So many legendary queers have passed on. The death of Screech really hit the industry hard.
On Sunday A Rod took Corky and Mr. Belding to the movies to see the new Batman Movie. On the way there Mr. B said he was sure it would be no “Saved by the Bell Hawaiian Style” but hoped it would decent. Corky announced he needed a large popcorn, 6 boxes of milk duds, a jumbo icee, and a few hot dogs, and a jumbo Mountain Dew. Mr. B said Corky had the right idea and A Rod could just double his order. When they got in the theater they were happy to find there were large reclining chairs that Mr. B could fit into. A Rod soon showed up with enormous piles of food and Corky and Mr. B ate like animals as the movie started. Within seconds Corky belched loudly and then began laughing. A few seconds after that Mr. B rolled onto his side and ripped a 11 second fart that shook the theater. Within seconds the stench caused many people to relocate to other areas of the theater. A Rod told Corky they needed to settle down so others could enjoy the movie. At this Corky belched in A Rod’s face, and told A Rod he and his best buddy were actually adding some action to the movie and everyone loved it. At this Mr. B let loose a 7 second belch. This went on for about 20 minutes with Corky and Mr. B ripping ass and belching until the entire theater reeked of ass. A Rod again yelled at them to be quiet, and Corky became enraged, saying A Rod’s interruption had made him miss a good part of the movie. He then smacked A Rod in the face as he crawled out of his chair. He bodyslammed A Rod to the floor and ripped off his Yankees uniform. Seconds later he was giving A Rod some rough anal as the patrons of the theater cheered on lovable Corky and Mr. B ripped a 16 second fart that cast a haze over the theater. Many of the male patrons jerked off to this display and the arousing aroma of Mr. B’s latest fart. Corky then jizzed all over A Rod and kicked him, before getting back into his seat and reclining it. Corky and Mr. B then continued watching the nearly 3 hour movie while ripping farts and belching the entire time. A Rod just laid on the floor moaning from the beating Corky deservedly gave him.
Barf, that's a heartwarming story about Corky, Mr. B, and A-Rod at the new Batman movie! A-Rod deserved to be beaten and raped for being rude to Corky and Mr. B while they were having fun and trying to enjoy the movie. A-Rod got off easy - he's fortunate that Corky didn't make him rent out a scooter to use to go back and forth from the concession stand with more food for Corky and Mr. B. I could see Corky viciously beating A-Rod and then driving over A-Rod with the scooter! Also, if Mr. B sat on the scooter, his immense weight would cause the tires to pop and if A-Rod started laughing at the sight, Corky would throw A-Rod another beating for making his best buddy feel badly about his obesity, which Corky believes is something that Mr. B has no control over.
Ay Yo, funnel guy! Ain’t you gon’ tell dat foo’ Burt bout whit gwahn on dat fart ish?! ManDem need to kno how he gon’ fart using dat funnel! he ain’t asking for no goddamn reason ma’fuka
Gents, I just got back from a trip to Mars. Right now Mars is full of former Senators and the Screech clones are kind of studs! I saw a Screech whipping former senator and massive RINO John McCain being whipped in the testicles with a rusty car antenna by Screech. He kept begging for more. Then Screech took a dump in his mouth! A few minutes later I saw Harry Reid being buttslammed by a Screech. It was kind of comical as the Screech still has a micro penis and Harry kept asking “is it in yet” which annoyed the Screech who stood up and farted in Harry’s face causing him to go into convulsions and spray jizz everywhere. I feel if this continues the entire stability of the fabric of the universe could be in jeopardy!
Last night Corky was butt-slamming A-Rod when Mr. Belding walked into the room while eating spoonfuls of a large can of chocolate cake frosting. Mr. Belding walked right up to A-Rod and ripped a 15-second fart into A-Rod's face which had the stench of rotten eggs. A-Rod yelped, "Zoinks!" and then flinched. Corky got mad that A-Rod moved while Corky was using A-Rod's butthole for sexual purposes, as A-Rod had thrown off Corky's rhythm. Corky yelled that A-Rod needed to stop moving and stop being such a demented faggot. Corky then donkey-punched A-Rod before blowing a massive load of his diseased 'tard semen into A-Rod's orifice!!
I wonder if Corky would mind if I came over with my funnel so I could get tips from him and Mr. Belding. Then when he was ass-slamming A Rod I could put the funnel in A Rod face and let loose a good blast. Anus Goblin you’ve given me an amazing idea! My desire to fart in A Rod’s face has only grown, and I could learn from two true masters. Can anyone get me in contact with them?
BUrT. STay aWaY fROM mY mAN!! U SOunD Lik fAGit!
Corky that wasn’t very nice. I’m a big fan of your ‘tard work. I have all your albums and a complete collection of Life Goes On. I even have a collectors edition copy of the never aired episode where you ran over and old lady in the drivers Ed car, then backed over her before doing a burnout! I never understood why Alf was in the front passenger seat as the Drivers Ed teacher?! Now I just want to fart in A Rod’s face like you and Mr. B do. I have no interest in your man except to rip a blast in his face. It’s my life’s only goal. Please help me attain this. It’s my Mount Everest. Uggghhhhhh, I just lost a massive load thinking about ripping a pepperoni fueled fart in A Rod’s face!
I like to fuck and suck off dudes at random truck stops.
Platypus Man, I’m gonna fart in your face with my funnel. When can we meet up?
I would enjoy making A-Rod dress up like Screech for a role-playing game. He would sport a Jew-fro wig would wear rainbow colored Zubaz pants. Then I would pretend that I am Zack and would give him rough anal and he yelps in pain and homosexual pleasure. Mr. Belding would be in the room eating a pie while ripping ass to cheer me on. Corky would overflow his diaper and would then strangle A-Rod with the diaper. The currently obese Kelly Kapowski would be eating a bag of Doritos while also fingering herself as I really give it to A-Rod’s version of Screech!
Ass Plunderer, is there any doubt that within a few years A Rod will be traveling the country to lurk in truck stop and rest area bathrooms as an unpaid bathroom attendant? I cannot wait for that to happen, as I too would love to fart in his face, and butt-slam him while flushing his head in a urinal!
Guys I’ve been practicing for my next run in with A Rod. I don’t have a job currently so I have a lot of free time. Today I hung out a gas station. They have so many kinds of junk food. I ate piles of snacks and some gas station chili dogs. Within an hour my stomach was rumbling and then my target entered. Some little 90 year old lady. She was so shrunken her had was at my ass level. I decided I didn’t need my training funnel and as she opened the cooler door to get a bottle of water I backed my ass an inch from her head and really pushed. I let loose a really nice wet fart right in her face. Full disclosure, I also sharted a bit. She recoiled and began coughing like crazy. It was the proudest moment of my life. Soon afterwards the gas station clerk kicked me out, which sucked as I didn’t get to use the bathroom and had to drive home sitting in my shart. But it was totally worth it. Tomorrow I’m going to continue training mat another gas station. Next week I’ll train at Taco Bell and Pizza Hut restaurants. Thanks for the encouragement guys! At this rate I’ll be competing in fart contests by next year!
Hey everyone. Just here to report another good day of training. Today I was at a Shell station, and really wolfed down some Doritos, chili dogs, beef jerky, an icee, and some Mountain Dew. I had some really good belches which I think impressed some people. The clerks kept watching me which I think means they were impressed with my moves. I put in a full shift starting at 9am and leaving at 4pm. An old man came in to use the ATM and I stood right by him and grunted out a squeaky, but potent little butt bomb. When it hit him he made a face and wacked me with his cane. It didn’t hurt much so I found it funny. He really got annoyed at my farting prowess. Later on a little kid was near me and I let a good burp fly right in his face. He seemed stunned and his Mom looked annoyed, so I headed to the bathrooms to hide out for a bit. Thankfully they were gone when I came out. I also ate some bugles which gave me a quick but pungent flutter fart that I let loose near some middle aged obese lady. She looked so mad as she stood there sweating and huffing my stink. I spent about $50 on junk food and Mountain Dew which I think was necessary to put in a full day of training. It’s nice to have the funnel training wheels off, and to be able to increase my talents. Tomorrow I’m going to get a large pepperoni pizza, and a two liter of Mountain Dew. Then I’m going to ride the bus around town to treat the passengers to some amazing beaches and farts. I’ll try and report back. I hope I run into A Rod!
Burt, that was an amazing field report! Keep up the good work and let us know which food and drink concoctions give you the most powerful farts and belches. When I was in my mid-20s, my company had a nice summer event for the young professionals like myself. We played golf on a short course during the summer heat while drinking beers - I distinctly remember sweating all afternoon while playing a boring game of golf. After the golf, we all went to a Mexican restaurant where I ate some greasy tacos and had a few Corona beers. After dinner, we all went to a bar/dance club. All of that beer and Mexican food I had eaten was mixing in my stomach and I suddenly had to expel some gas while I was in the middle of a bar. So I let loose a long silent fart and figured nobody would notice anything. However, I suddenly realized that it smelled heinous - it reeked of the smell of rotten eggs! A hot girl in our group put her fingers on her nose to try to block the stench and I pretended to be disgusted, hoping everyone would assume someone else had cut the fart! So anyhow, I suggest greasy Mexican food and Corona beers if you want to really stink up the place!!
Don’t give up on the funnel play too early burt.
I am a pro at it and it allows precision fart attacks whilst also turning on lots of studs who see my brown stained funnel poking out of my shorts.
Me and ‘seafood’ Sammy Sosa worked on a technique I called the ‘Miami VIce’, where I used a jockstrap on its side to lock my buttcheeks in place with the funnel, then we created a diet called the ‘Mississippi Mud Pie Sunrise where you eat a undercooked seafood pizza, a packet of tums and then the dessert - apparently a lot of macho baseball players swore by it! Anyhoo, the combination of both…plus a funnel makes you an Uber stud and is a guaranteed way of delivering potent farts in someone’s face.
Think about it…the methane gas for your anus hasn’t even interacted with the air and oxygen yet so it is super powerful. I also recommend that you put the funnel directly over ARods nose next time, or a large one over his head and give him a Mexican shower. Because you are at a distance you can turn round and watch the action full frontal if you need to - I have been begging Mr B to try a funnel for years. However, last time he tried he clogged it up with shit and couldn’t get good purchase
Eating poo-poo is a fun thing.
Rocco, your funnel technique is equivalent to that guy on the Penn swimming team who is pretending to be a woman and is blowing real women away in the NCAA swimming finals. He obviously enjoys freaking people out and getting his rocks off. It is akin to how ripping ass and using a funnel to direct the fart into someone’s face would freak that person out!
What a weekend everyone. On Saturday I had my Mom take me to Little Caesars where I got 3 large pepperoni pizza’s, and 3 two liters of Mountain Dew. She then dropped me at the bus stop so I could start my training. Once on the bus I took over a seat meant for two people and put my pizzas on the other seat. I then began chowing down! Impressively within a few minutes my stomach was angry. I don’t normally eat pizza that early. I had a few nice small blasts that I expelled by leaning my ass into the aisle and grunting. I was discouraged when it didn’t stink much. But I kept chowing down and also guzzled some Mountain Dew. This caused me to have a really nice 3-3.5 second belch. I was proud of how loud it was, and the rank odor it produced. By this point the bus has really filled up, so people really got to enjoy my training performance. Then disaster struck. My tummy got really angry and within seconds I knew I was going to have diarrhea. Before I found this board, and entered training, I would have panicked. Instead I was calm and collected. I dropped my pants and underwear, leaned into the aisle again, grabbed another slice if pizza, and let loose my very first diarrhea spray! I think by the mayhem this caused I can say I impressed a lot of people. The bus came to a screeching halt and I was put off the bus right there. As I left some of my fellow passengers began clapping, which made me so proud. I had really connected with them, and many were saluting my performance. I had an all day bus pass so I walked to a local gas station and used their bathroom to clean myself up. While there I treated an old man to a fart, and he called me a “huge faggot” which I took as him hitting on me. I told him he was too old for my tastes but was happy he enjoyed my fart. I then gathered my two remaining pizza’s and soda’s and got on another bus. I found another nice seat setup and continued eating and drinking. I found that after that diarrhea my stomach settled down and soon I was regularly producing some nasty farts. These were complemented by some generous belches. Some little kids kept running up and down the aisle annoying everyone so I decided to teach them a lesson. The next time they came by I stuck my ass into the aisle and ripped a blast of at least 6 seconds. They fell to the ground and began crying. The next thing I knew some obese Hispanic woman was yelling at me in Spanish. I don’t speak Spanish but I’m pretty sure she was thanking me for controlling her stupid kids with my amazing farting skills. I said “you’re welcome” and she gave me a funny look and got off at the next stop. I bet she farts on them whenever they get out of control after seeing how I did it. The rest of the day continued on like that, with me eating pizza, and drinking Mountain Dew while ripping farts or varying lengths and stenches. I took a few pit stop breaks at gas stations, and to get an ice cream cone. Then when my shift was done I got off and called my mom to come get me. She is so proud I’m training to be like Mr. Belding and Corky, and totally supports my dream of farting on A Rod. I took Sunday and today off. But tomorrow I’ll be back in training at another gas station. I’ll put in a full day and report back. Hope everyone is having a great day!
Hey everyone. You may remember me from the 90’s show “Step by Step”. I’m here to announce that this spring I will be joining the cast of SBTB on Mars! I will be reprising my Step by Step role, and will be play a meathead astronaut that’s in search of hot alien poon-tang. Who knows what will happen when to my surprise I get to Mara and discover it’s full of raging queer Screech clones!
Hey Dudes! You might remember me for my role as the Code Man on “Step by Step”. I was booted off the show for some drug abuse, and for karate kicking my wife a few times. Thankfully the good folks at the Peacock network have given me a fresh start on SBTB on Mars. I’ll be back with JT and man will things get crazy. Pair us up with Mr. Belding, Corky, and a bunch of crazy Screech clones, and you have the makings of “Must See TV”! I plan on using my karate all the time and the van I lived in on Step by Step will be back in the form of a Spaceship. I saw an early script and let’s just say the Code Man gets a lot of man ass on Mars! If my van is a rockin Don’t come a knockin!
Burt, that was a fantastic summary of your experience on a public bus. It has been many years since I last ate Little Caesar’s pizza, but I’m sure it was great fuel for potent farts. I find that really cheap pizzas tend to include low grade ingredients which are perfect for one’s colon to produce noxious odors!
I’m sure that the people giving you weird looks and calling you a “faggot” we’re just jealous that they couldn’t produce magnificent heinous-smelling farts like you can. I bet that old man was rubbing one out thinking about your fart after he got home after your encounter with him as the gas station men’s room.
Corky was watching Inside Edition the other day when he saw a report about a woman from Brazil who suffered from internal gastrointestinal issues because she refused to fart in front of her partner, as discussed in this article: https://nypost.com/2022/03/22/singer-told-her-15-7m-followers-all-about-her-gas-crisis/
Corky then told A-Rod that he cared about his own health and that is why he was always farting in A-Rod’s face. A-Rod replied that Corky was always farthing because of the unhealthy junk food he ate daily. A-Rod also said that Corky was a disgusting pig and that the only reason they were together was because A-Rod liked Corky’s enormous dong. Corky got mad and slapped A-Rod in the face! Mr. Belding briefly paused shoveling deep dish pizza slices down his throat to lift his leg and rip a 15-second pepperoni fart to support his best buddy, Corky. Corky then rubbed his ass against A-Rod’s face while ripping a 17-second heinous-smelling Taco Bell fart of his own! Corky then ass-raped A-Rod to teach him a lesson!!!
Anus Goblin, A Rod is such a liar. He could easily find another stud with a massive package. He only pretends to be disgusted with Corky so Corky will manhandle him, and pound away at his anus. A Rod must love being humiliated by a ‘tard whose shirt is covered in pizza sauce and crumbs. Corky and Mr. B do have amazing farting and belching skills that are only ever found at the very top of the pepperoni fart echelon.
I was thinking about a time I ate deep dish pizza past summer in my backyard with family for a July 4th get-together. I was sweating profusely during the 90 degree heat and drank several cans of Mountain Dew that cool off. After eating a few huge slices of sausage deep dish, I remember going inside to use the toilet and practically peeling my sweat-soaked underwear off my ass and ripping several farts during this before taking a smelly dump. I think it would be hot to sweat profusely while having bad gas and then feel A-Rod’s expert lips on my butthole. Then I would feel A-Rod’s tongue up and down my sweaty ass crack as I continually fart on his tongue! Any other weirdos into this type of thing?
Guys, I ran into a poofy headed, Zubaz wearing, fruitcake last night at a truckstop in Macon Georgia. He was working as a bathroom attendant and serviced my p and a needs like a pro. He really dug his hook nose into my asshole giving me some exquisite pleasure. When I ripped a nice fart as a rip he fell to the floor, went into convulsions. and jizzed all over the place. Now for the kicker. He told me his name was Screech, and that he recently returned to earth after being “born on Mars”. What the hell is up with that? Is there any way one of the Screech clones has escaped and is now sucking off random dudes at a Georgia truckstop? I’m wondering if during the filming of the upcoming SBTB on Mars one of the clones was able to stowaway on the spaceship back to earth?!
Anus, are you not exaggerating? Count to 17. That sure is a long time for a fart and Mr B is typically only capable of averaging 15 second farts outside of competition. A 17 second fart by corky, if true, makes me think he is coming close to being ready for the national cham pionships?
UBO, the old adage when you want to be the best you train with the best is coming true for Corky. Spending years learning Mr. B’s eating habits, while watching him let loose amazing belches and farts has paid off big time for Corky. If A Rod had only done the same he could also be a superstar belching and farting champion by now, instead of being Corky’s cum dumpster.
Beefcake, I think you are correct and are onto something, however, I remember once, coming across a guy in 80s headphones and a blue cap who was without pants and trying to leapfrog over another dude who was in a match worn cubs outfit. He started boasting to me that he ‘has been around athletes’ and that is why he was so good at leapfrogging. However it seems that he wasn’t able to get fully over the guy and drop a fart mere inches from his face as he wanted to.
Perhaps there are some exceptions to the rule, huh beefcake?
Hey guys, I was a grip during the filming of Saved By The Bell. I was friendly to everyone on the show and still have fond memories of my time working on that set. Zack and Slater were ladies men who were always getting busy with random girls in their dressing rooms. Screech, on the other hand, was really into playing video games and typing on a computer. I used to play him in games of Pac-Man on his Atari 2600 during breaks. Eventually I told him that the game was getting really boring and that he should consider getting some new games. Screech then began handing out with Kevin the Robot. At first, I thought that they were just good friends. However, this one time I walked past Screech’s dressing room and heard him uttering “Zoinks!” repeatedly. I looked into his window and happened to notice that Kevin the Robot had what appeared to be a large metal penis and he was really giving it to Screech right in the ass! I always knew Screech was a dork and a weirdo but I hadn’t realized what a demented faggot he was until this point! I also witnessed Kevin remove his metal penis from Screech’s ass before shooting a large amount of hot motor oil from his metal penis into Screech’s Jew-fro! Kevin then rotated 180 degrees so that his back was facing Screech. Kevin then expelled what looked like a cloud of battery acid into Screech’s face, causing Screech to again utter, “Zoinks!” Kevin’s release of the cloud of battery acid resembled a fart - that must be how some robots fart? Screech and Kevin sure were a strange couple of faggots!
Ass Hawk, it certainly won’t work for everyone. You still need basic abilities to be able to progress in anything. It seems in your comparison that loser lacked basic coordination and physical skills needed to do a decent leapfrog. No matter how much time he spent with true pro’s he likely never would get any better then just passable. Corky on the other hand already enjoyed eating all kinds of garbage. He has a fantastic can do attitude, and he hasn’t rushed his progress. He’s spent years honing his skills under the tutelage of Mr. Belding. Now it’s paying real dividends.
Larry, that is one hot story, and made me really miss that depraved lunatic Screech. He was such a loser no one wanted to hang out with him. So he hung out with a robot. Now he’s where it gets strange. I’d think most people would want there robot to be their servant and do what they wanted. Instead Screech preferred being Kevin’s bitch, and being ass raped and covered in scalding oil repeatedly. I’m not sure if that was Screech is design, or if something else occurred. There have been many theories regarding Maxwell Nordstrom reprogramming Kevin to be a deranged homosexual robot whose only mission was to violently attack and assault Screech. What’s weird is you said Screech seemed to enjoy hanging out with him. I mean what kind of weirdo wants to be sodomized by a robot, then have battery acid “farted” into their face? I miss Screech.
Beefcake, Screech was a weird one. He actually thought that his Jew-fro made him look cool - he was oblivious to the fact that everyone laughed at him behind his back because of that poofy ‘fro. Screech was really annoying on the set. The producers bought him Kevin the Robot to be his friend because nobody else wanted to hang out with him. Screech was good at computing but instead of playing chess or having Kevin perform math problems or serve him in some other way, as you suggest, Screech instead programmed Screech to be his sex robot. Initially Kevin had a tiny hold in his back but Screech couldn’t bring himself to insert his micro penis into that hole. So Screech instead teamed up with Maxwell Nerdstrom to install a metal penis on Kevin and to add-rape Screech. Screech loved being Kevin’s sex slave and was manhandled by Kevin on a daily basis! I’m not sure who programmed Kevin to fart battery acid, but Screech enjoyed being humiliated sexually! When Screech was on The New Class, Kevin the Robot and Mr. Belding would double-team Screech in Mr. B’s trailer in between takes on that rowdy set.
Larry, I kinda disagree, but I know that theory has been doing the rounds since 1996. I recently re read ‘Behind the. Ell’ for the 50th time and there is a passage in there where screech said he had mistyped some code on his Windows 3.0 notepad and accidentally created a robot penis. However, he had also programmed it to take advantage of new AI algorithms, and naturally Kevin started to react to his surroundings on the rowdy saved by the bell set and turned into a cross between Coach Sonksi and Rod Belding. These were the cast members he hung around with the most.
I’ll admit, I’m a gamer, I wear black cargo shorts and I am overweight. Additionally, I spend my times in goodwill looking for big box windows 98 games and retro tech. I have however hit on a new money-making scheme where I get paid by demented freaks to lead them round the goodwill furniture aisles and I point out old chairs and sofas that still smell of farts. The one thing I hope above all else is that I one day find the seats he used to sit in at the max or his office desk in sbtb the new class. I’d make thousands!
Have you also seen that behind the bell is no longer on sale?
AssGamer, Behind the Bell was full of lies and cannot be believed. If you believe Diamond inadvertently “created” a robot penis, you’d also need to believe he got laid by hundreds or thousands of the female extras. We all know that didn’t happen. I’m a firm believer in the Nerdstrom theory. I could see Slater and other members of Coach Sonki’s shop class welding on a giant metal cock, while Nerdstrom programmed Kevin to be a raging homosexual robot with eyes only for Screech. Screech of course would try to cover his “best friend” ass raping him non stop, by pretending he did it himself.
That side hustle you have sounds super erotic! I’ve never been in a goodwill and had no idea it was such a bastion of depravity!
AssGamer, Behind the Bell was full of lies and cannot be believed. If you believe Diamond inadvertently “created” a robot penis, you’d also need to believe he got laid by hundreds or thousands of the female extras. We all know that didn’t happen. I’m a firm believer in the Nerdstrom theory. I could see Slater and other members of Coach Sonki’s shop class welding on a giant metal cock, while Nerdstrom programmed Kevin to be a raging homosexual robot with eyes only for Screech. Screech of course would try to cover his “best friend” ass raping him non stop, by pretending he did it himself.
That side hustle you have sounds super erotic! I’ve never been in a goodwill and had no idea it was such a bastion of depravity!
Does anyone know where one can get a raging queer robot with a huge metal dong? If I remember correctly they used to sell those in the “adult” section of Radio Shack. But now I’m not sure where to get one?
This summer I will be traveling the country in a 1982 Conversion van. I’ll be staying at rest areas and truck stops while on my “Hairy Ass Tour”. For $10 you can by a little bag of my fecal chips. I will also be charging people to watch me piss or take a dump. $20 to watch me take a masterful piss, and $35 to watch me unleash a monster shit. I will also be teaching classes on taking big dumps. There will also be pop-up opportunities to smell my farts. The charge for that will be determined later. I will soon release a more detailed tour scheduled. I can’t wait to meet you deranged faggots.
Joey, what an announcement! This sent shock waves through the gay community. It’s the equivalent of a legendary rock band announcing a summer tour! Do you still wear Zubaz pants, and sport a magnificent Jew fro? My phone has been buzzing non stop with people texting me about this. The queer community has plenty of spare cash for deranged entertainment like you’re offering.
I just saw the episode of Charles in Charge where Corky showed up as the Powell kids retarded cousin. When old man Powell took “Cousin Speedy” in to meet Charles they found he and Buddy Lembeck 69’ing on Charles bed! Within seconds both Mr. Powell and Speedy had erections and joined in for what I have to say is likely the most erotic queer foursome to ever be shown on Saturday morning TV!
I heard a rumor that A-Rod is going to fill in for a movie role originally meant for Screech because of Screech’s untimely passing. The movie has been on hiatus since 2020 because of Covid. The title of the movie is “Anal Jizz Buckets” and A-Rod will play the role of “Cum Bucket #2.” This could be A-Rod’s big acting break!
Joey Buttafuoco, your “Hairy Ass Tour” is sure to be a huge hit. Many demented faggots will undoubtedly pay to watch you take a long piss or a smelly dump. It is too bad that the former wrestler Chyna committed suicide - remember when you kicked her ass on Celebrity Boxing??
Steve Anus, I do remember that. She talked such a big talk, but I taught her a lesson. I really wish they had allowed me to fight that loser Screech. It would have made more sense for Horschak to fight Chyna, Screech to fight me. I was still older then he was by over a decade, and we were both about the same height. So why the hell he was allowed to fight scrawny ass Horshack made no sense. I would have broken that guys hook nose with my first punch, and he would have ran out of the ring crying. I’m counting on the queers of this country to make me some fast cash this summer. I’m already bagging my fecal chips, and plan on drinking a lot of beer and water so I have insanely long pisses. I have my own proprietary concoction that gives me some of the largest dumps known to man. It will definitely be worth the money. If Screech was still around I would have brought him along as an unpaid bathroom attendant and used his mouth as a urinal. He would have made a few tips along the way that would likely have been the most he earned since SBTB went off the air.
Joey, it would have taken maybe 20 seconds for you to connect with Screech’s hook nose and knock him out. It would have been awesome if Mr. Belding suddenly rolled out from under the ring and then climbed into the ring with you. Then you and Mr. B would fart into Screech’s face to wake him up, kind of like smelly salts. Once Screech was revived, Mr. Belding would help Screech up to his feet only to have you run up and clothesline him! Then you and Mr. B would press your assessment up against his face and rip ass over and over again until you could fart no more. At that point you two would spit roast Screech as he repeatedly uttered “Zoinks!” to the cheers of the Celebrity Boxing crowd and the announcers! Then Mr. Belding would pull a VHS copy of “Dustin Diamond Teaches Chess” from his massive ass crack and you would break it over Screech’s head! You and Mr. B would leave the ring to cheers and then go across the street to eat dinner at Pizza Hut!
Hey everyone. My training has continued and I have a nice little tip for everyone. Friday night I had a nice meal that included a generous helping of Brussels sprouts. On Saturday morning I went to a local Sunoco station for my shift. I ate a few gas station breakfast burritos, a bag of funions, and drank a two liter of Mountain Dew. A few minutes later I ripped off my first 10 second fart. It immediately stank up the entire gas station. I believe it was the Brussels sprouts that did it. People were coughing and wheezing, and I stood there basking in glory! One elderly lady who was buying some gum went outside and puked. To say the gas station staff didn’t recognize a true stud was in their midsts is an understatement. I spent the rest of the morning hanging out, mostly benching, and ripping off some less potent butt blasts. After my lunch of two gas station chili dogs, and a bag of cool ranch Doritos I headed to the bathroom where I released a shit so magnificent it nearly topped out above the bowl. I flushed, and immediately left, knowing what was coming. A minute later I heard a commotion as someone noticed water pouring out from under the bathroom door. Their toilet was unable to handle my monster shit, and as a true treat two of the gas station employees got to clean it up. I have to say I really trained hard at that gas station. I wish someone would make a montage of my training like they did in Rocky. They could show me gobbling up junk food, ripping amazing farts that made an old lady puke, and my monster turd that caused a tidal wave of shit water. It’s amazing how far I’ve come in such a short period of time! I’ll be back at it tomorrow guys. I’m going to start adding some hot sauce to my diet along with more Brussels sprouts.
Joey, I tried to get a ticket to your “Hairy Ass Tour” in Baltimore over the 4th of July but all tickets are sold out except for the VIP tickets at $495 a piece! All it says to describe the VIP ticket is “ extra bag of fecal chips, and a an overnight pass for the van”. Is that all you get?
Hey everyone, I recently discovered an “Easter Egg” on my DVD of the second season of Saved By The Bell. There was a director’s cut version of “The Fabulous Belding Boys” where Rod Belding made his first and only appearance. In the episode, Screech was in a stall in the boys bathroom being on the receiving end of rough anal sex with Rod Belding. Suddenly, Principal Belding walked into the bathroom to lift weights when he heard some groaning. Principal Belding assumed that the groaning was just someone taking a loud dump, as students normally fart and take dumps while he’s getting in a weightlifting workout. However, when he subsequently heard the distinctive sound of buttslamming followed by a few utterances of “Zoinks!”, Principal Belding knew something was up and walked into the stall and caught Rod really giving it to Screech. At this point, Principal Belding told Rod he had to leave the premises and wouldn’t be able to take the SBTB kids on their rafting trip. Apparently, the NBC censors back in 1990 wouldn’t allow anal sex to air on Saturday mornings , so the episode was rewritten to have Rod meet up with a stewardess as his excuse for not taking the kids rafting. But in the hidden episode, after Rod is made to leave, Principal Belding viciously ass-rapes Screech at the end of the episode while Mr. Dewey sits on a locker room bench jerking off!
Elliot, that really is a shame. It’s sad that the censors ruined what would have been an amazing whitewater rafting trip all because of their closed mindedness. Thankfully nowadays that would never happen. If the reboot was in any way accurate a Zack character would be taking advantage of the liberal laws and would totally be identifying as a girl so he’d have access to the girls locker room and showers. If anyone complained they would be arrested for their bigotry! Slater would be cleaning up on the girls swim team as well as the girls track and field. After each victory he’d run his junk in the faces of the losers, and if they complained, off to jail they would go. Rod Belding ass slamming Screech in the boys bathroom would he openly celebrated, and likely shown in sex Ed classes across the country to show normal, healthy, sexual behavior. What an amazing new world we live in!
Today Corky was very excited and rushed into A Rod’s bedroom and belched in A Rod’s face before telling A Rod he and Mr. B had come up with a another million dollar idea. He demanded A Rod come to the game room to see it. When A Rod got there he found that the pool table and other games had all been moved outside, and there was now a stage with some giant speakers and other musical equipment. At the front of the stage were 4 microphones. Two at normal height for singing, and then two directly behind them that were much lower and were facing the wrong way. Corky told A Rod to take a seat and get ready for the “show”. He then went into a little room off the main room and when he returned it A Rod saw Corky and Mr. Belding in matching sequined jumpsuits, as well as a sound technician who headed to the mixing table. A Rod asked what the hell was going on and who had paid for all the equipment, but quickly piped down when Corky threatened him. Corky and Mr. B then got in front of the microphones and Corky said “Hit it”. The sound tech then began playing the. 80’s song “I think we’re alone now” by Tiffany, and both Corky and Mr. Belding began signing. At one point they simultaneously belched part of the song, and then Corky began hopping around on stage, really showing off his moves. Then they both leaned back so their asses were right in front of the microphones and let loose insanely loud farts. The speakers were so loud A Rod’s ears began ringing and he covered his ears angering Corky. But as true professional do they continued on, belching and farting to the song until Mr. B did a 19 second solo fart to finish out the song. The tech then turned off the music and Corky and Mr. B high fived. Corky then yelled at A Rod for covering his ears and asked him what he thought of their new band? Corky told A Rod he’d used his credit card to rent all the equipment and pay people to move if all in. He said A Rod needed to work on getting them booked on a summer tour and that all of their shows would sell out in seconds. A Rod said that of all Corky’s ideas this was easily the worst. He said no one wanted to watch he and Mr. B burp and fart to some lame 80’s song, nor did they want to see uncoordinated Corky jumping around. At this Mr. B let loose a 9 second fart to show his disapproval. Corky was even angrier and grabbed a metal folding chair and bashed A Rod over the head with it. He yelled that everyone wanted to see he and the Big Bopper perform, and he knew this because he had played packed park pavilions and a few elementary school cafeterias with his former band and people always clapped for his dance moves. He told A Rod he had no musical taste and was just jealous Corky was going to be a rock star. Corky then ripped off A Rod’s Yankees uniform and gave him some rough anal. During this Mr. B wobbled down and got his ass a few inches from A Rod’s face before letting loose a nice 4 second wet fart. Corky then jizzed all over A Rod, got up, grabbed a pool cue and wacked A Rod over the head with it. He and Mr. B then went off to get a well deserved snack and discuss potential names for their new band. During this their roadie/engineer took a nice dump on crumpled up A Rod’s head. A Rod sure learned a thing or two about good music that time!
I would enjoy meeting up with Corky to watch tv at A-Rod’s house. I’m not gay or anything like that, but Corky and I would each sit bar-assed on A-Rod’s pillowcases while eating greasy pepperoni pizza and constantly ripping wet farts. Afterwards, we would start watching heterosexual porn and jerk off while still sitting on the pillowcases. We would jizz into the pillowcases and then put the stinky jizz-soaked pillowcases back on A-Rod’s bed pillows. We would then put our pants back on and go harass A-Rod while he works out in his home gym. Corky would punch A-Rod in the balls and then kick up the ass before ass-raping A-Rod! Then A-Rod would crawl into bed and lay down on the fart and jizz-soaked pillowcases while Corky and I go watch a ball game. Corky, please make this happen soon!
Today I was out doing some food shopping with my mother. She’s been so proud of me for keeping up my belching and farting training. She never thought I’d amount to anything, so she’s over the moon that I’m on my way to becoming a world class burp and fart master. Anyhow, we were in the frozen food aisle, and some obese woman came riding down the aisle on one of those motorized shopping carts and bumped into my mother almost knocking her over! Normally I wouldn’t have been able to do anything. But thanks to my training, and the encouragement from members of this fine board I now could. I sauntered down the aisle to where the beast was loading up on pints of Ben and Jerry’s and found that her head was nearly at my ass level. I opened the cooler right next to her, bent my ass in her direction, and ripped a beauty of a 6-7 second Brussels sprouts, slim Jim, Tabasco sauce, and pepperoni pizza fart right in her face. She immediately crinkled her nose and started to yell, but then started to cough and fell right out of the scooter. As I walked back to my mother she was beaming with pride. She called me her little farting champ and even got me some extra treats! I’m on cloud nine boys!
Inside Man, what the hell was A-Rod thinking?? He should support Corky’s dream of becoming a music star. I’m sure that millions of people would pay to watch Corky and Mr. Belding sing, belch, and fart their way through hit songs! A-Rod is lucky that Corky tolerates him. A-Rod needs to be far more supportive of Corky and his best buddy, Mr. Belding.
I just watched an episode of the show Cheers. I was surprised when I saw Screech’s name in the credits, and after some research I saw he played a “fart gobbler”. So I went back and really watched and episode closely and you could clearly see him lurking beneath the bar in different spots. Many times he was right near Norm, squatting down against the bar where Norm always sat. Sometimes you could clearly see Norm lean a little off his chair and Screech would get all excited as Norm ripped some kind of fart. You could barely make out him huffing the stink, but that Jew fro was unmistakable! I wonder if it was one of his earliest roles? I do wonder why the writers had a 10 year old in the bar, lurking around huffing farts? Does anyone here no what was up with that?
Years back I was at a high school basketball game in Port Washington. While cheering on my son I noticed Screech under the bleachers. He had positioned himself right under an obese man, and was in a state of ecstasy when I saw him. It was obvious he was huffing that man’s farts, and deriving some twisted sexual pleasure from them. I went under the bleachers to accost him, and he ripped down my jeans, tounged my anus, and gave me a masterful handjob. Now I’m not a gay man, but I have to say he really took care of my sexual needs. We exchanged numbers and he would occasionally call to beg me to fart into the phone, or to set a time to meet up under the football stadiums bleachers so he could service my penis and ass needs. I miss that poofy headed fruitcake.
Bobby, could you please refrain from using less than inclusive language like ‘twisted’, we should all celebrate diversity.
Anyway I have a question for you / all As I am HR lead at liberal arts college and I am doing an impact assessment on intersectionality amongst our Lgbtqiax*++ colleagues and have one question. What is the most important characteristic amongst you lot in the dumpster scene. Is it being able to belch loudly, fart over 10 seconds, being obese or having a huge dong?
I am having a hard time trying to work out what is the most and least most important characteristic here.
Bobby Butthole, that is a fantastic story and I have read similar things about Screech. He was apparently notorious for stealing sweaty jock straps from the football team and would sniff them while touching himself inappropriately. One of the janitors also caught him loitering under the bleachers during high school basketball games which occurred on “taco night” and most spectators had heinous gas. Screech would sniff the farts and allegedly also filled up gas mason jars with some of the smellier farts he encountered
Last night Corky and A-Rod were watching a tv show about 1980s music videos when the music video for the “Super Bowl Shuffle” played. An announcer said that the artist was “The Chicago Bears Shufflin’ Crew” and was filmed in 1985. Corky really liked the song and told A-Rod that he wanted to see that band the next time they come to Miami. Corky also said that he liked lead singer Jim McGwire. A-Rod asked Corky what the hell he was talking about. A-Rod said that the singer he was thinking about is Jim McMahon, not “Jim McGwire.” A-Rod also said that it was a novelty song and that the Chicago Bears Shufflin’ Crew was actually the 1985 Chicago Bears football team. A-Rod then told Corky that he seemed to get dumber every day and that he should keep his mouth shut and let A-Rod fondle his enormous dong. Corky got mad and accused A-Rod of lying to him and of being a “dirty Mexican.” A-Rod replied that for the 100th time, he is Dominican, not Mexican. Corky was outraged at A-Rod’s rude comments and slapped him right in the face before yanking off A-Rod’s pants and ass-raping him!
Gary, A Rod gets more insulting by the day. A Rod could easily have put together a band to do the Super Bowl shuffle that adorable Corky loved so much. Instead he had to make fun of him and reduce him to just being a ‘tard with a massive dong. A Rod absolutely deserved that ass raping!
Anonymous, I’d probably speak for most here when I tell you being obese is the biggest pull factor on the dumpster scene. You combine the visuals with the butt smell and sweat.
Ballwhipper, you raise important issues to which I wholeheartedly agree. When I was young I used to be attracted to women and would check out their face and bodies. However, about 15 years ago I was an an oasis-type truck stop when the man at the urinal next to me ripped a loud and long fart while he was peeing in his urinal. I immediately became aroused at the stench and turned gay, a common experience among those of us in the gay community. Now that I’m gay, I’m more aroused by ass stench and ball sweat than I am by someone with desirable body by a magazine standards.
Ballwhipper and Ass Breath, most of what you say is accurate. I would say that farting prowess, and stinkability, is most important. Now those are traits normally found in the obese. But there are times that skinny people surpass the obese. In a notorious case the “Problem Child” is known to have BO so rancid it can be smelled 25-50 yards away! I have met numerous skinny guys that produce farts incredibly potent. In face, much like Ass Breath I was totally hetero with a wife and kids only 20 years ago. Then one day on my way home from my corporate job I stopped at a truck stop to get gas and use the bathroom. In the bathroom I stood at a urinal next to a tall skinny trucker who was wearing jeans and a giant belt buckle. He aimed his ass at me while I pissed and ripped what was likely a 10-12 second fart. Seconds later the stench hit me and my brian instantly rewired itself, changing me from a hetero family guy, to a raging deviant queer. A minute later I was in a bathroom stall getting my ass tounged. By the next day I had a abandoned my family and got a job as a long haul trucker. For me it’s all about the stink. I would take a 10 second fart over just an obese guy, with the caveat being normally the obese guy is the most likely to stink like an anus, and be able to produce rank 10 seconds farts. I hope this helps Anon.
Crotchmaster, that is a fantastic story about how you had a personal epiphany and turned gay. It is almost as though you were hypnotized by that trucker's epic fart!
By the way, has anyone here seen the movie "Anus Stench #7"? It is a gay porn flick which was released in 2015. One of the characters has a poofy Jew-fro and looks a lot like Screech! I cannot be certain it is him, but that guy was on the receiving end of some loud and wet farts expelled by several fat and sweaty men! He was also on the receiving end of some rough anal while a nude obese man ate a pizza and continually ripped ass in his face. It was a spank-tastic movie which I highly recommend!
I just saw an episode of the show Small Wonder. Screech guest starred as a nerd who fell in love with VIKI the robot. Even though she was a robot she hated him and left robot farts in his face, and also gave him electric shocks. The entire Lawson family hated him and Jamie threw rocks at him, while the parents cheered him on and yelled Jewish slurs at him. Screech ran from them and tried to get on his bike but found that Jamie’s black friend Reggie had stolen it! Right before the credits rolled they showed Screech living in the sewer and peering up from a storm drain while Reggie and Jamie pissed on him. That was a pretty dark and twisted episode!
Stink, do you think that Screech was originally hired to play that character on the episode of Small Wonder? Or did the actors just ad-lib those scenes? It is strange that so many roles for demented faggots during the 1980s and 1990s were played by Screech.
Toilet Clogger, when you look at Small Wonder they never had a show where anyone yelled racial slurs and whipped rocks at another character. The show was family friendly, and the biggest nerd on the show was this fat kid named Warren who fell in love with VIKI. There was some light hearted scheming, but nothing compared to the Screech episode. I have to say the writers likely wrote a fun loving episode to portray Screech as a new nerd, but he was so obnoxious the director and actors began ad-libbing and rewriting the episode until instead of a nice lesson about treating others nicely, it became about throwing rocks, pissing, and farting on Screech.
Hey guys. Really good to see everyone having such a good time in here. This weekend I continued my training. I decided to spend an entire day at a Pizza Hut. I’ve noticed that Mr. Belding and Corky use Pizza Hut when they really need some high powered farts. I got there just as they opened so I could get a booth and told them to bring me a large deep dish meat lovers pizza and a pitcher of Mountain Dew. I found it really fantastic, and while I chowed down I watched gay porn on my phone. It was nice to have the recommendation of “Anus Stench #7” which I can confirm definitely had Screech in it. I got a lot of funny looks, and a family asked to be moved, but I took that as a sign of respect that rather than be behind me they wanted a better view of what they knew would be coming. After just a few minutes the Mountain Dew kicked in and I began letting loose some serious belches. From then on my amazing waiters knew when I pointed at them and belched it was time for a Mountain Dew refill and another Pizza. After 30 minutes my farts began kicking in. I really would lean out of the booth so my ass could entertain everyone. My first fart was only about 4 seconds but it was extremely loud and juicy. I watched as people made faces as the stench hit them, knowing how impressed they were. I would follow that up with a belch or two, then get back to watching some gay porn and continuing to feast. After few hours of this my farts became nastier as the pizza was processed and created what I’ve deemed “filtering”. As a shift potato formed in my ass it forced all farts to filter through it. Creating an unimaginable stench. I could see how impressed everyone is was as I would dangle my ass over the edge my booth seat and let loose cannonball like farts. I made sure to aim my ass in different directions in order to ensure all patrons enjoyed my butt blasts. By late afternoon I’d been there for 5 hours and felt a massive dump ready to give. I thought about releasing it onto the floor, but decided I needed to hit up the bathroom scene. Upon entering I first took a piss of at least 45 seconds. I was bummed no one else was there to see it and cheer me on. Then I had a great idea brought about by stories from this fine board. I dropped my pants, turned around, and shit in the urinal. I did that so everyone could be impressed by it, as well as get a kick out of dookie in the urinal. It was pretty amazing and the rest of the evening I enjoyed seeing people go into the bathroom, then come out with a weird look on their face, before heading to their table to tell their companions about the amazing turd in the urinal. One person told their family they believed a dinosaur had been in the bathroom. I beamed with pride. I continued my feasting until they closed at 9pm. Farting, belching, and watching hot Screech porn the entire time. I got a lot of impressed looks from the waiters when it was time to head home. I’d say it was another successful day of training. Can anyone give me a few tips as to other places I should hit up to train. My mother is super proud of me for sticking with my training, and said maybe this summer we should head to Chicago on vacation so I can train with some real professionals!
Burt, that was another fantastic field report! I bet that the Pizza Hut smelled like baked ass by the time you were done eating there. Heterosexuals might not appreciate what you did, but gay guys know how impressive it is for one customer to be able to fill up an entire restaurant with noxious odors.
Have you seen the gay porno, “Ball Sweat #17”?? I think it was filmed a few years ago. I recall that in one scene a big fat guy sat naked in 90 degree heat on a chair which had holes in the seat. The fat guy was munching on thick slices of pizza while sweating profusely from his balls and ass and farting loudly periodically. There was another dude laying on the floor below chair and was getting doused with fart juice and sweat from the fat guy’s balls and ass. The guy on the ground looked kind of like Screech, although it was hard to tell. That guy had a massive hook nose and appeared to be experiencing exquisite pleasure while lying on the floor under the chair.
I saw that Albert Pujols has signed a contract with the St. Louis Cardinals and is planned on ending his career there. I heard that he has been chowing down on greasy burritos and planning on overflowing the toilet in the Cardinals clubhouse with his patented "green doodoo water" before the April 7th home opener against the Pirates.
Today A Rod was watching a Netflix documentary about the Fyre Festival while fondling Corky’s rhinoceros penis. As they watched it Corky said that he wanted to have a festival like that where a bunch of stupid people sent him money and he tricked them. A Rod said that was a horrible idea and that the guy who did it went to jail. Corky said A Rod was an idiot and that Corky was far to lovable to be thrown in jail for tricking people, and he even had thought of a cool name. Corky Fest. He said that he would lure people in with promises of his and Mr. Beldings band, as well as lots of other bands like Jimi Hendrix, and Liberace. When A Rod said both of them were dead Corky slapped him across the face and said that didn’t matter at all as no one was going to be performing. He said he might say Abe Lincoln was going to be there. Corky said that he was going to post about his festival and that he and Mr. B would take tantalizing photos of themselves in their band outfits, and would even have their dongs peeking out of their zippers. He said he would likely have millions by the end of the day. He told A Rod he would need to help, and could take pics and get the, posted to the website A Rod needed to create. He also told A Rod he needed some celeb power and that he needed A Rod to contact J Lo, and Derek Jeter, and that he would call John Pepperoni and Steve Anus. A Rod then said he wasn’t helping at all, as he didn’t want to go to jail, and wouldn’t be calling anyone to participate in Corky’s scam. At this Corky lost it, and told A Rod he never supported anything he did. He then punched A Rod in the face, and ripped off his Yankees pants before giving him some rough anal. Corky then sat on A Rod’s face and jizzed all over his head. He then ripped a 14 second fart on A Rod’s head that included a nice dookie squirt. Corky then went off to tell his best buddy Mr. B all about his amazing idea. I for one hope Corky Fest happens!
Burrito, Corky is correct that he could have pulled off that scam and gotten away with him because he’s a lovable ‘tard who still wears a diaper - who would ever prosecute him? However, I don’t blame A-Rod for not going along with the plan as he would have probably been blamed for enabling a retard to commit fraud and would have been criminally charged. What A-Rod should have done is helped Corky while concealing his own involvement- this isn’t rocket science and A-Rod should have figured out how to get this done. Corky obviously ass-raped A-Rod in order to provide the necessary motivation to get A-Rod to do the sensible thing and help him.
Hey everybody, I just jerked off to “Stinky Buttholes #14”. There was one actor who sported a huge poofy Jewfro - he had his entire giant hook nose inserted in another guy’s asscrack when the other guy ripped a loud fart and the Jew-froed guy jumped back and uttered “Zoinks!” The actor with the Jewfro looked kind of like Screech. I looked at the credits and saw that the Jewfroed character was played by “Dustin Powers.” Does anyone think that “Dustin Powers” could be Dustin Diamond, who played the character “Screech Powers” on SBTB???
Toilet Clogger, Screech starred in thousands of gay porn movies, but never used his real name. He did this first, as he couldn’t use Screech or he’d be sued by NBC, and he didn’t want to use his real name as he felt him huffing farts, eating feces, and jamming his massive hook nose into an obese man’s asshole would hurt his chances at more serious cinema such as Insane Clown Posse’s “Big Money Rustlas”. If you see what you think is Screech in a gay porno it’s almost certain it is.
ComE tO CoRky FesT! SeNd ME $$$!
Corky, I really want to come to Corky Fest, even if it’s a scam. But you don’t list a website, or any way of buying tickets? Is Elvis still performing? I personally own one of his last jumpsuits, from when he was at his most humongous. After Over 40 years the scent of baked ass and BO still permeates it as it did the day I bought it. I’ve jerked off while huffing it’s magnificent stench thousands of times! I’m hoping to get “The King” to autograph, and maybe refresh it with a fart or two, at Corky Fest!
I love corky with all my heart & soul and want him to assfuck me and then spooge up my anus-hoal and then the next time I go poop all of his rotten semen will come out with the shit and then I can drizzle it on top of my pancakes and cereal & it will be very yummy..
Wow, that sounds like a really tasty treat.. does it come in lime-flavor as well?
Yeah, it's called our mommy's slimy green gash, and I have to agree it is quite tasty & also very fragrant.. :)
Alrighty, c'mon now boys.. you know darned-well that yer momma's cootchie is all mine & strictly off-limits to you boys - but her ass is most definitely fair-game, so please feel free to hit that as early and often as you'd like!..
I graduated from California University in 1997. When I was a freshman, I lived across the Hall from the dorm room where Zack, Slater, and Screech lived. The floor’s Resident Advisor, Mike Rogers, was often in their room trying to put a stop to Zack’s hijinks. Near the end of the second semester, Zack has busy dating Kelly and Slater was busy working, wrestling, and dating Alex, a girl who lived in the next dorm room. Screech, on the other hand, wasn’t dating anyone and was often alone by himself in his dorm room. One day during early April 1994, I was taking my small garbage can to the floor’s big trash can when I walked pst Screech’s room and heard a loud fart followed by some moaning. Not sure what was going on, I stood in the hallway eavesdropping. All of a sudden, I heard some lout butt-slamming coming from the room as someone whimpered “Zoinks!” - it sounded like that person was in pain! A few minutes later, I heard a voice say, “yeah, take that” and it sounded like someone was blowing a load of semen. I felt a little freaked out, so I walked down the hall to dump my trash. When I walked back, the door opened to Screech’s room and I was immediately hit the the stench of anus and ball sweat. I saw Screech limping around and he appeared to be covered in semen and a light coating of diarrhea juice. What was that all about???
My brother, Bob, played "Mike Rogers" on Saved By The Bell: The College Years. I once visited him during a taping and noticed that Screech seemed to be enamored with Mike. Screech was a goofy-looking young man and had an enormous poofy Jew-fro and would follow Bob around like a puppy dog. I went up to AC Slater and asked what the deal was with Screech and was informed that Screech had been servicing Bob's penis and ass needs for the past few months. Slater also told me that he heard that Bob enjoyed the feeling of Screech's massive hook nose in between his sweaty ass cheeks. It was all shocking to me, seeing as how Bob wasn't even gay, although apparently Screech had that effect on many straight men. I ran into Mr. Belding on the set that day, which was kind of weird seeing as how he wasn't even on that show. Nevertheless, after the taping, Mr. Belding and I went to Bob's trailer and caught him having anal sex with Screech. Mr. Belding and I then pressed our asses against Screech's face and ripped smelly farts while Bob really gave it to Screech right in the ass!
Wheres that Bart dude, boasting about 4 second farts?
I demand to know three time pressing answers to some important questions ths board has.
1) How much does he weigh?
2) Does he gobble deuce?
3) what clothes does he wear?
Bart, you had better give these responses RIGHT NOW so i can make a judgement
Anon, those are entirely correct and sensible questions to ask. These are the type of hard hitting questions any stud has to answer before he can graduate to the dumpster scene.
I’d go further and say he should be aiming for 280 pounds before he can even start boasting about farts. The third question is also crucial. If he is going around in normal fabrics and clothing, then he’s not going to get much ‘fart dividend’. For 30 years, Zubaz or something stretchy has been CRUCIAL in heinous farts. He has to give a serious answer
Not sure about gobbling duke. I don’t see it as necessary. But hey, I’m a corky or an Ox, not an A Rod or a Bartman
Wow California buy, I just saw your spankworthy post! You sure must have some other hot stories to tell, huh? What’s the sleaziest thing you ever saw?
Hi fans. As soon as I get out of this jail cell I’m going to be making the best gay porn anyone has ever seen. I’ve found a Screech look alike, and I’m gonna really rail his butthole, while dudes dressed in Tiger costumes take dumps on him. If this is giving you a boner please write to President Biden and tell him to give good ole Joe Exotic a pardon! Maybe Joe Biden can guest star in my hot porno!
I just saw the episode of Saved by the Bell the New Class where the gang was in Paris. While riding their tandem bike Mr. Belding suddenly had to take a shit. As he didn’t speak French and didn’t see a McDonalds or gas station nearby he realized he’d have to take a shit right there. Not wanting to shit his own pants he made Screech come over, turn around, and squat down behind him. He then had Screech pull the back of his cycling pants out, then pulled down his own cycling shorts. He then took a huge dump that went from his asshole and fell into the back of Screech pants. He told Screech that as his assistant being a toilet was part of Screech’s job. He then wiped his ass on Screech’s Jew fro and said he felt much better. He then told Screech to get back on the bike so they could head back to the hotel. Screech protested a bit and yelled “Zoinks” when he sat on the seat and shit squished out of his cycling shorts. Belding told him he shouldn’t have shit himself. When they got back Mr. B pointed at Screech’s ass and seat and told all the students that Screech had shit his pants. As everyone began laughing and pointing at him Screech started crying and then ran into the hotel. As he ran in everyone laughed even harder and began yelling “shit pants” while ripping rocks ar him. The writers really nailed that episode!
Nick, that was one of my favorite episodes of the New Class. It was great comedy whenever Mr. Belding would do something disgusting and then blame Screech for it! But Screech was Mr. Belding's unpaid assistant and being a makeshift toilet was one of Screech's duties. Screech is lucky that Mr. B didn't use Screech's hook nose to scoop out any chunks of doodoo from his anus.
If I remember correctly, Mr. Belding and Screech returned the bike to a bicyclye rental shop later that day and the shop owner was angry that there was dookie on the seat where Screech had been sitting. Mr. Belding told the shop owner that Screech was an idiot and had shit himself. The shop owner then said that Screech needed to clean up the mess he had made. The shop owner proceeded to drop his pants and then peed on the bicycle seat and used Screech's Jew-fro as a sponge to mop of the urine and wipe clean the seat!
I met Screech back in the summer of 1999. I was in my Kenworth hauling logs from upstate Washington to Sacramento, CA when I got on my CB to let other truckers know about a speed trap I had seen on the I-5 in Northern California. About a minute later, someone got on a CB who used the handle, “The Zoink Man.” He thanked me for telling him about the speed trap and said that if I needed to relieve myself, I should use a rest stop about 15 miles further down the I-5 because there weren’t any other ones open to the public for the next 200 miles. I thanked The Zoink Man for the info and said I’d visit the rest stop to go to the bathroom. The Zoink Man said he’d be there as well. So about 15 minutes later, I stopped at the rest stop and went into a stall to take a huge dump. After sitting down on a toilet seat, I ripped a loud fart and started expelling the contents of my colon into the toilet. Al of a sudden, I heard a knock on the stall door and saw that there was some weirdo staring at me through the gap between the stall door and the wall partition. The weirdo said that he was The Zoink Man and asked whether I needed any breath mints or anything like that. I asked him to go any and leave me alone. Then, suddenly, the guy got down on the bathroom floor and craned his head under the space below the stall door and said, “Excuse me, sir. Can I help you wipe? Are you sure you don’t need anything?” The guy had a huge Jew-fro and massive hook nose and I immediately recognized him as Screech from Saved By The Bell. I asked for an autograph and then he suddenly managed to open the door from the outside. He said he could give me something better than an autograph and asked me to stand up so he could wipe my ass clean. I was getting freaked out, but I agreed hoping he would help be get out of there more quickly. But instead of using toilet paper to clean my ass, Screech inserted his hook nose into my ass crack and started moving his head up and down, inhaling chunks of doodoo. Screech then asked me to wipe my ass with his Jew fro. I unleashed a massive fart during this, at which point Screech fell over and had some type of homosexual seizure while jizzing his pants! I’m not gay or anything like that, but it was a surreal moment which I’ll remember for the rest of my life.
Trucker Joe, Snap! I had a similar experience but this time it wasn't just someone with the 'Zoinkman' handle that came on, but then there was a rival call on the CB from 'Milton' apparently, they knew each other and started squabbling over who had the biggest cock over the airwaves. I left them to it and drove right on past them both!
Second thing, I am sure i saw two people looking similar to Anthony Rizzo and Aaron judges on all fours circling each other and sniffing their anuses in the electrical aisle of a goodwill recently. I overheard one of them saying 'he doesnt want to get caught doing this' but it was disgusting!
I was watching a special about notorious molester Jimmy Savile on Netflix. I was surprised to see an old episode from the late 90’s of “Top of the Pops” which he hosted. In it he introduces a “good friend from across the pond, The Big Bopper” and Mr. B then comes out to thunderous applause. Tagging along with him is Screech who someone throws a partially eaten apple at. Jimmy regales the crowd with tales of he and Mr. Beldings escapades, and then announces a special musical guest. Moments later Gary Glitter comes out and “Rock n Roll Part II” blasts from the speakers. Gary goes over and punches Screech right in the nose, as Mr. B and Jimmy rip off Screech’s Zubaz pants. The crowd goes bananas as Mr. B presses his ass to Screech’s face, exclaims he just ate some rotten fish and chips, then let’s loose a 19 second fart so loud the speakers distort! By then Gary and Jimmy are spitroasting Screech who keeps trying to yell “Zoinks”. The crazy thing was this was shown by the BBC on regular TV, and no one seemed to care?! After Jimmy and Gary jizzed all over Screech Mr. B bent over, dropped his trousers, and let loose a monster shit spray, completely coating Screech in dookie juice. They then panned to the crowd and we could see all the male guests were jerking off wildly while everyone else cheered Screech being abused. Mr. B, Gary, and Jimmy then high fived and Jimmy ended the show saying he needed a good drink after such a nice buttslamming, and they we’re heading to the local pub. They then left as the crowd cheered and the PA system played some loud farts. Screech was left laying in a heap on the floor. What was up with all that?!
What the hell is wrong with you faggots who post here? You are sick perverts. You are all going straight to hell for posting this garbage. Can't we have an Internet which is free is this filth?
- WTF
P.S. I want Corky to strangle A-Rod with a diaper while I violently butt-slam him!
Nigel, Mr. Belding certainly hung out with some perverts! They certainly had fun violating Screech and the crowd clearly throughly enjoyed the show!
Hey guys. I enjoy this board and all its amazingly erotic stories. I’d like to know if I’d be accepted into the community at large. I’m a straight man who enjoys crop dusting people. I spend nearly all of my time hanging out in elevators and other crowded places, where I can really crop dust people, and make them smell my farts. Today I hung out at a nursing home, where I just randomly walked into rooms and ripped ass. Those old people really got fired up and eventually security tossed me out. Is this level of deviance acceptable for your queer community?
Hey A-Rod, please pencil me in for a rimjob at the Exxon gas station men's room near your house on Wednesday night at 10:45 PM. I will be wearing black Nike sweatpants and a gray Nike cap. I meet you in the second bathroom stall. Please be sitting on the seat in that stall at 10:45 PM and I will enter the stall, drop my sweatpants and rip a wet fart in your face. I then allow you to tongue my asshole while I force out a few more farts. I am willing to provide you with a can of Mountain Dew and a shiny quarter for this service. Let's hook up.
Xoxo
Joel Cumstain
Does anyone else believe much of the behavior towards Screech was likely scripted? I remember seeing that “Top of the Pops” episode when it originally aired and thinking it was like pro wrestling. I mean why bring Screech along at all, unless he was there to be abused, ass raped, and shit on? I’m now wondering if much of this was set up by deviant queers trying to indoctrinate the youth? If so, I find that pretty erotic!
I hope everyone is having a great week full of loud farts. I saw a question aimed my way and I’m honored to answer. Im 6’1 and 180 pounds. I don’t eat turds. And I normally wear jeans or jean shorts and a T-shirt. Although I am considering getting some sweat pants or trying to find some of the legendary Zubaz pants spoken about so reverently. I hope this helps.
I’ve been training almost non stop. My mom made a meatloaf the other night that gave me horrible gas. I decided that I needed to make use of that gas and went right down to my local Shell gas station. I just stood there ripping fart after fart, impressing everyone. Most of the farts weren’t very loud or long, but the stench was unimaginable. The cashier seemed really impressed and kept asking me if I was going to buy anything. I just told them I was good, and then would lift my leg a little and crank out another juicy blast. There was a weird guy there who kept following me around and telling me he “liked my style”. When I would rip a fart he would start breathing deeply and seemed to really get off on it. He seemed pretty deranged, but I assumed I’d attract some interesting characters along my journey to greatness. Near the end of the night I ripped a wonderful 6 second fart that really had some power behind it. There was an old lady who looked at me with a mean look and said “excuse you” while the weird guy crawled around behind me right near my ass. You guys will be proud of what I did next. I went right up to that old bag and belched in her face. I’d been chugging Mountain Dew all night and it produced a really nice belch. I left her there stunned by my amazing skills and headed to my car to drive home. All in all it was a great night. Mom’s meatloaf is a winner.
Burt, that was a lovely field report. Who was that weirdo following you around? Was it a gas station employee or just some random guy? Can’t you show off your farting prowess without some damn fruitcake following you around and harassing you? What is this world coming to?
Last night, A-Rod took Corky with him to watch the Tigers play the Red Sox in Detroit. During the game, Corky asked A-Rod who the DH was on the Tigers. A-Rod replied that it was Miguel Cabrera. Miguel Cabrera’s career stats were displayed when he came to bat and Corky told A-Rod that Miguel Cabrera was a much hitter and had way more homers than A-Rod. A-Rod disagreed and informed Corky that he almost 200 more home runs than Cabrera and also won more MVPs. Corky replied that if that was true, he’d still be playing. Corky also said that Miguel Cabrera had the same body type as his best buddy, Mr. Belding, and said that was why he was so good. A-Rod asked Corky what the hell he was talking about and pointed out that Miguel Cabrera probably weighs 120 lbs more than when he was a rookie and that he’s a big fatso. Corky got mad and then punched A-Rod in the balls! A cameraman at the game say the incident and the video feed was displayed on the stadium Jumbotron! Everyone started laughing at A-Rod and cheering Corky on, including the PA announcer! Miguel Cabrera then climbed over the wall up into the stands. A-Rod breathed a sign of relief because he thought that Miguel Cabrera was going to save him from a vicious beating. However, A-Rod’s relief quickly turned to panic when Miguel Cabrera dropped his uniform pants and underwear and then pressed his bare ass up against A-Rod’s face and ripped a nasty 15-second wet fart as all of the men in the stands started jerking off while the women gingered themselves! Corky then ass-taped A-Rod while Miguel Cabrera ripped another 10-second fart in A-Rod’s face!!!
Hi all, i came across this site by accident and as soon as I read the name Screech i instantly got a shameful flashback from my past. Way back in 92-93 i was a marketing director for Sega and had just released a couple of new games and Sonic 2 was our Big Push.
Anyway, i was doing a tour of malls trying to get the public to see the game close up with mobile test stations and it was going pretty well until i need to drop a duke. I had been in hotels and motels and all that greasy breakfast food had made my anus reek and I was brewing up every time i was on the podium.
One time at a New England mall i could feel a turtle head coming and was touching cloth so i quickly made my excuses and ran to the nearest toilet, in there i unleashed the most heinous, sweaty duke i'd ever managed! I was just crimping the last bit out when i realised i didnt even shut the door and saw a nerdy looking guy with a queer look on his face who then begged if he could 'do the honours' I told him to get out of there and called him a weirdo, but before i could shut the door he was in the booth gobbling my shit like a pro, it turned out it was none other than screech who was super famous around that time!
Sensing an opportunity i said as i had done something for him, he had to do somethin for me and he agreed. I then made that sucker do my job by going into the Mall and selling Sonic 2 to all the kids! I made a quick buck on that day, and even better, the sonic mascot got a round of high fives as he dropped trou and unleashed an AC Slater style diaorrhea spray over screech on the podium!
Bud that makes absolutely no sense. This is the one story I have read on here that I can categorically say is bull shit!
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