Tuesday, June 30, 2009

More Fantastic Spank-worthy Posts From Dustindiamond.com!

15th February 2007 - 11:44:49 AM
79502 : 911 Stock Analyst
I want you to buy some airline stocks because I'm gonna buy a plane, fill it with prison sperm, then crash into your anus, thereby creating a tsnaumi of cum that will be as big as 9/11 -- does the thought of a plane load of cum being dumped into your hole whilst you make money off the airline stocks turn you on? Well does it? It'd better bitch - cause the airforce creampie one is heading your WAY!

29th March 2005 - 01:59:48 PM
12942 : Gay Zack
So I met Dustin at a bar, he was asking me if I knew where he could buy an 8 ball of coke. I told him I could probably hook him up if we went back to my place. We got home and I offered him a nice stiff drink, which he slammed down. I called up a guy that I fuck sometimes and told him that Dustin Diamond needed an 8 ball of coke. He dropped it off, while Dustin downed a few more drinks. During that whole time Dustin and I got to talking about chess and his comedy, I really think we hit it off. He asked me if I would have a problem if he smoked some in my house. I said it was cool. He took out a little cloth bag that had a glass pipe that looked just like a penis. He kind off smiled when he saw that I noticed the penis pipe. He lit up and smoked and offered me some. I refused so he smoked more. After a while he sat by me and started to make out with me. He shoved his tongue down my throat and began to stroke my now fully erect cock. He took my pants off and began to suck my off. He got naked and put his ass up to my mouth and I gave him a Russian trombone. I made him cum all over the floor, than I put my cock deep inside his ass and pounded him like I’ve never pounded before. He let out a whimper like a little puppy as I slowly took my cock out and penetrated deeper. We fucked all night long until he started having trouble getting hard, so he said he needed more coke. He dumped some on my cock and began to snort it off, than licked off the rest. He slammed down some tequila and began rimming me. I asked him to hold on and I went into the bathroom and changed into my Screech outfit. When I went back out he instantly got hard and began pounding me to the point that shit leaked out of my ass. He got on the floor and asked me to let my juices flow on his stomache. I took a big runny shit all over his stomach, than I started to let it drip on his face and goatee. He stroked his dick until he came, while he also fingered his ass. The whole room smelled of coke, cum and shit – it turns me on just thinking about it. We stayed up all night and in the morning we took a shower together. He left and told me he would call me next time he was in town. I’m sure he says that to all the guys, but even if he doesn’t return, at least we had that one beautiful night of homo erotic pleasure that gets me hard and dripping every time I think of it.

29th March 2005 - 11:04:15 AM
12940 : Maxwell Nerdstrom
Screech, remember the time Belding was sodomizing you over his desk and, unbeknownst to you and he, I was hiding under the desk the whole time? Remember how, just as the two of you climaxed, I reached up and turned on the microphone for the PA system and the whole school heard the following dialogue? -

Belding: Oh yeah! Take it all the way in, you faggot!
You: Zoiks!
B: Uhhn!! Oh God! I'm gonna cum!!
You: Oh yeah, do it in my ass, big daddy!
You (climaxing): UH-OH, SPAGHETTI-O's!!!

Remember how you had no idea why you said that when Belding came inside you, but for about 6months afterwards, whenever anyone saw you they said 'UH-OH SPAGHETTI-O's' until you tried to kill yourself?

LOL j00 goT PWNED FAGG0rt!!!11!

29th March 2005 - 08:29:38 AM
12936 : Maxwell Nerdstrom - continued from below
Remember how Belding was so incensed he pulled his dick out of Slater's ass, walked over to you and shouted 'LEARN TO KNOCK, YOU PUFFY-HAIRED FAGGOT!' in your face before slugging you in the gut? Remember how you groaned and went down, and Belding thrust his still-erect penis into your mouth? Remember how it tasted of burritos and guacamole from being in Slater's ass? Remember how you were shocked at first, but then remembered your feelings for Belding, and started giving him the blowjob of a lifetime? Remember how Slater said 'Hey preppie, where's mine?', went round behind you and stuck his smelly mexican erection up your ass? Remember how they spit-roasted you for a good 15 mins before showering you in semen? Remember how you thought you had died and gone to heaven? Remember how that was until you discovered that I had secretly video-taped the whole thing, and one day I rigged the video up to play over Belding's school-wide PA system and put captures from the film up all over the school? LOL I PWNED J00!!11

29th March 2005 - 08:18:27 AM
12935 : Maxwell Nerdstrom
Screech, remember the time you first realised you had feelings for Mr. Belding? Remember how it was after we'd had computer club, and you and I were walking down the corridor of Bayside, when we saw Belding strutting towards us? Remember how he had a bad Village People mustache and was wearing a brown corduroy suit with a pink shirt, wide lapels and slightly flared trousers? Remember how you were stopped short by his beauty, and stood there with your mouth agape? Remember how your teeny-tiny little cock went instantaneously hard? Remember how you had a major crush on him for a few weeks, until one day you finally decided to go to his office and come clean? Remember how you burst through the door of his office and walked in, only to see Belding ass-fucking Slater over his desk? Remember how the sight was so arousing, you shouted 'ZOIKS! I'M GONNA CUMMM!!' and pulled down your pants and immediately blew your load all over the two of them without even touching yourself? Continued...

29th March 2005 - 12:19:57 AM
12932 :
screech, did you really star in a gay porno called "screech's sausagefest"?????

28th March 2005 - 12:29:04 AM
12912 :
remember the episode from sesami street where screech visited? remember when grover invited screech into his trailer and then ass-raped him? remember when 'the count' counted the number of loads lost in screech?

05th November 2004 - 12:03:09 AM
10840 :
when is diamond going to grace us with his presence here? i want him to post some of his own homo fantasies. please post such fantasies, u brillo-headed faggot.

04th November 2004 - 10:46:06 PM
10837 : SB
Whoever "Roger Rimjob" is, thank you for your courage in infiltrating the STPK board.

I did a lot of the other posts (Gay Farrier, Gay Fez, Gay Sexton, Felch Slurper, The Filthiest Queer, Gay Dustin, Admiral Cockenballs, etc.)

We've done good so far, but it's really getting intense now. It actually looks like Dustin has taken personal offense. It shouldn't be long before Dustin Diamond is personally cleaning out our dirty shitholes with his long, gay tongue.

Who cares if our posts get deleted? We have a clear and determined mission. If every sick fuck who posts here would post on the saltythepocketknife.com forum, we would be unstoppable, and Dustin might finally get the message! That he needs to suck his own sperm out of our fart chambers!

PS: Thanks also to Gay Zack, wherever he may be. Zack, you are totally queer.

04th November 2004 - 08:57:12 PM
10835 : Buck Studly
My National Toss a Stranger's Salad day was very erotic as well. The fags down at The Rainbow Lounge (my favorite queer haunt) celebrated by holding an 'identify the asshole' contest. Basically, the contestant had to eat out a row of bent-over queers and identify the asshole owners by taste alone. The prize for doing so was a salad tossing from the all the participants, followed by cleaveland steamers and chocolate twinkies all round!!

04th November 2004 - 08:48:25 PM
10834 : Flaming Gay Dustin\'s automatic writing
Queers! Smelly butts! Gaylords! Marcia's sex-change operation! Sales on leather-wear at Merv's! A.C. Slater's erect ding-dong poking through his wrestling leotard! Cleaveland Steamers! Poop! Big Bird's smelly crotch! Runny doo-doo! The Zack Attack covering The Village People! Belding gives a chocolate twinkie to Maxwell Nerdstrom during detention! Gay! Licking stale urine from the floor of the men's bathroom! Condom spelunking! I'm flaming gay!

04th November 2004 - 04:31:05 PM
10833 : Rim Slippersly
I met up with a decent looking Puerto-Rican Slater. He had a neon pink muscle shirt that accentuated his pert nipples so. First I had to taste his cock. It was throbbing inside his workout pants. I unveiled it to see a bead of glimmering pre-cum. I devoured his Jumbone. He must have been hot, because after only a minute, he blew about thirty ounces of warm Slater-spunk right down my throat! I then began prodding his puckering brown anus with my tongue, but when I momentarily look up, a long line of Slaters, Zacks, and Screeches had assembled, all wanting a good rimming! Well, let me tell you. I've never tasted so many different man-holes in my life! It was truly a free-for-all of shitter sucking and knob rubbing. How did your day go?

04th November 2004 - 04:24:55 PM
10832 : Rim Slippersly
How was your National Toss-A-Stranger's-Salad Day? Mine was FAB-ULOUS! First I was in line at the bank. I had the cutest little "Zack" costume. A large Samoan man in front of me farted, and the aroma was intoxicating. I hit him in the head with a hammer, rendering him unconcious, and then proceeded to eat out his dirty ass. After that, I went shopping for pretty curtains, and what do you know? The store owner in the spitting image of Dustin Diamond. Zoiks! I munched his shithole furiously. He had tuna casserole the night before, with green beans and corn. Then, it was off to the pride parade to find some more tastey pooter meat. There were so many Slaters and Zacks and Beldings and Screeches, I didn't know where to start! (Continued)

04th November 2004 - 03:11:08 PM
10826 :
Today is National Toss a Strangers Salad day! Go out and toss some salad to any queer whom you share a "moment" with - look out for any SBTB costumes that's a sure give away that you can toss their salad. I already had my asshole cleaned out 3 times today!

28th October 2004 - 08:08:13 AM
10636 : ritual abuse
dustin, remember the episode where you tried to slip lisa a roofie at the max? remeber how slater noticed you dropping the pill into her cup and switched it with yours when she wasn't looking? well, if you don't remember that, one thing is certain, you definitely dont remember much of anything other than waking up with a bleeding asshole face down alongside a highway the next morning... but believe me, slater and his gang of greasy latinos had a great time with you that night!!!11!!

20th October 2004 - 10:27:12 AM
10449 : Angie =coolbeans@leroy.com
Oh good Lord in Heaven.

This is a guestbook where people come to sign it innocently, but end up working themselves into a sweaty, crazed frenzy as they empty their deep and dark subconscious fantasies, delving deep into their inner sanctum - a psyche so raw and untouched - and leaving with such inconceivable filth. They sit down, their fingers lashing over the hotly tapping keys, their mind racing as they frenetically whip up another disturbing and depraved anecdote, dredged from their troubled minds. Spilling forth from their imagination comes torrid line after torrid line of fanatical rubbish, an intimate portrait of their most-needed hopes and fantasies, a sick sexual adventure is psychomania.

...And how odd for this all to happen on the fucking cheap knockoff Dustin Diamond site, for cunting out loud. THIS IS SO FRIGGEN BIZARRE.The Internet warped your social skills, dude - and Ox, get a friend and a forgiving God, son, you're headed for Hades. No doubt.

x Angie

30th June 2004 - 04:16:36 PM
8110 : Corey Haim
Hey everyone its me, superstar Corey Haim! Just wanted to give everyone the scoop on Fart Patrol! So far this week things are going very well! We shot a scene at a local bowling alley where Rudy (Dustin), and I (the wizard) think that we have located an amazing amount of farts in a bowling alley. The people at the alley were a little suprised to see two beefcakes show up in their shitty little part of Toronto but that didn't stop Dustin and I from being the professionals that we are. The manager came down to tell us that we couldn't film on the premises. This is where Dustin really shined! He started yelling do you know who I am you asshole, Im screech motherfucker! He then jumped in the air and flatulated in the mans face rendering him unconcious. Big D then looked at me and said, "hit it". The camera began to roll and Rudy (dustin) went over to the snack bar and stood there waiting for a fart to be left. We didnt wait long when some slob left a squeaker. Dustin karate chopped him and screamed fart patrol!

21st June 2004 - 07:03:19 PM
7865 : Jizz Master-P
Yo - I be bustin yo lilly white ass screech honkey - I put my black lips on your little white cock and pretend it's a white owl and I'm toking a blunt - Me and tha niggas gonna pull a train - we call you amtrack you little bitch - you be sucking my big 10 inch and rubing my balls

26th April 2004 - 12:25:45 AM
7215 : spa owner
dustin, i operate a chain of spas across California, with a number located in San Francisco. these spas are for for mens only!! we charge patrons $50 apiece to come in and sit in one of our huge spas. usually we fit about 10 guys in one spa. then we pop in the sbtb dvd and play a couple episodes. by the time 3 episodes are completed, the spa water is very cloudy and jizz and shit are floating near the top of the water level!! also the men all look really tired by the end. thankx for the pleasure. my business is up 10-fold since your first sbtb DVD came out!!

19th April 2003 - 02:49:42 AM
2907 : Larry Bolton
Hort, let's hook up for gay sex! We can play a tie-up game with ropes and whips - Dustin will tame you, you wild man!!! Dustin and I will then each blow our loads on your face! We'll try to time ourselves so that we blow our loads at the same time - we'll make sure we don't cross the streams! (Remember the "don't cross the streams" conversation from Ghostbusters?)

Call me! I love you, Hort!

- Larry

19th April 2003 - 01:08:54 AM
2906 : Emma
Seriously, how come screech never left the show? my roommate saw it today for the first time and asked if he was mentally challenged or something

15th March 2003 - 07:27:35 PM
1924 : Dellavedova
Dustin, when is a Saved By The Bell DVD going to cum out? I've been waiting to purchase all of the episodes on DVD for some time now.

It would be great masterbation material for me!!! I would pop it in my DVD player, play an episode and start tossing off once you walk into a scene. One time, when I in college, I was naked and touching myself while watching a Saved By The Bell episode when my roommate walked in on me. My roommate got naked and then tossed my salad while we watched the episode!!!

04th December 2002 - 01:54:05 PM
1573 : angel
vengeance is mine screech... i shall tie you to a tree and beat your teenage ballsack with my grandpa's smelly slipper!

die screech die! take that! *whack whack*

blue ballz bitch

05th October 2001 - 11:40:20 AM
338 : The Violator
HAHA, thanks for the intro, MrSarcasm.

Uuuungh! Ah yeah, that's right Screech, take it hard up the butt like a good little boy. Uuuungh, uuungh, uungh, oh god Dusty, I could do this all night. Hell, why not, I've already been doing it all day anyway. Uuuuungh, uuungh, uuungh, damn, your ass is even tighter than Kelly's! Oh, brace yourself, here it comes. UUUUNNNGH, UUNNGH, UUNGH, SPLOOOOOOG! Aaaaaaaahh... you know Screech, I don't think I could ever tire of shooting thick rope after thick, creamy rope of my steamy white demon seed up into your warm, smelly bowels. I wish you wouldn't cry so damn much though, you little buttfucking fagget, you're worse than your mother.

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